The Unlikely Quarterback Ch. 13

When they got home, we had dinner while they all regaled me with stories of their swimming adventures. After dinner they all ran off to their respective internet play areas, Jr. was likely playing World of Warcraft, and Luke was probably playing Call of Duty on his Xbox. Leia was probably on Instagram or something, I had a hard time keeping up with the latest social media crazes.

I was just settling down to catch up on this cool new show on HBO called "Game of Thrones" when my phone started buzzing me.

"Hello?" I asked, not sure who it was since their phone did not come up on Caller ID and I wasn't expecting a call.

"Hey, Mikey. How are ya?" a familiar voice greeted.

"Fine. How are you Simi?" I said, trying not to sound sarcastic.

Simone broke up with her girlfriend a couple of years after she abandoned Stephy. She still came to visit from time to time, but she was always auntie Simi to all my kids. When she turned thirty, she finally found a nice guy to marry and now had fraternal twins aged seven from Tom, her husband.

When Candy got sick Stephy inadvertently found out that Candy was not her biological mother. The doctors were looking for blood donations and she figured it out after the doctors revealed Candy's blood type to her.

To her credit, Stephy never stopped calling Candy her mom, but she did confront me about who her real mother was, so I told her. When Candy died, Simone started coming over more and more to help both of my girls with their girl problems. She was the one to take them clothes shopping and got them their feminine products. She was also there to comfort them in their grief since at the time I was completely useless.

My girls needed a mom and Simone stepped up and filled in that gap from time to time. To tell you the truth, I was a mess for the first year after Candy died and not much better the following year so having her around was a godsend.

It is funny, on reflection, on how changed Simone had become. She was now everything she ran away from initially. She was now a typical soccer mom, she had a minivan, and drove her kids to T-ball and soccer, was part of the PTA and even taught Sunday school at the church she was now a part of. She absolutely adored her family and even packed on about fifty pounds of mom weight. She was still a beautiful woman but in a way, I was glad that she wasn't as attractive to me as she was before because it made us better friends.

"Oh, I was planning on taking the Munchkins to Disneyland on Saturday," she said.

That was code for, "and do you want me to take your kids too?" I bought her, her husband and her two kids year-round passes to Disneyland, along with passes for me and my kids. Yeah, they were expensive, but she took my kids off my hands so much it was worth it.

Simone's fraternal twins were named Michael and Lillian. I often wondered if she named her boy after me but it didn't matter because they didn't call him Mike so it was easy to distinguish between Me (Mike), Mike Junior (because everyone called him Junior) and Michael because no one used the shortened version of his name. I loved them like they were family after all they were Stephy's siblings. And just like my kids called her Auntie Simone, her kids called me Uncle Mike.

Her husband Tom was an accountant and was maybe making 60 thousand a year. He was a good guy, but they were not exactly living the high life. They lived in Long Beach in a more rundown part of town, but the houses were cheap relative to everywhere else and they were living within their means.

I offered to buy them a better house, but I think that hurt Tom's pride. But I did have small victories here and there, I did actually get to buy Simone her minivan and, although Tom complained, I was able to convince him that Simone drove my kids around so much that it was only right that I get a car that could fit everyone in it comfortably, (which was all true by the way). We had become good friends over the years, so he relented.

"I'll have them ready for you. You want me to drop them off or do you want to pick them up?" I asked.

"I'll pick them up at eight," she responded.

"OK, I'll wire you some money for lunch and stuff," I said.

I usually gave her enough to buy the whole group lunch and dinner, since they were usually gone all day. And since they were essentially babysitting my kids for me, Tom did not complain when I chipped in either.

That is not to say it was not a two-way street. I sometimes took my kids and her kids to Disneyland myself, but that was rarer since it was much harder for one parent to keep track of five kids than two. I usually only went when I could get Lorry to come with me; but she, being a bigwig over at Amazon, was usually pulling down eighty-hour work weeks so it was hard to get her time.

There were even times when we all went as a group, but that was even rarer, not because we disliked each other but because it was hard for us to sync our schedules. Tom was a 9 to 5, forty hour a week guy and my schedule was all over the place.

"Thanks, Mikey. You're the best."

"No. Thank YOU," I said, and she blew me her customary kiss over the phone before I hung up.

After her call, I got as far as the theme song for GOT before I received another call.

"Hello?" I asked, a little annoyed because of the constant interruptions.

"Well hello stranger," Laura cooed. I was kind of confused because I did not remember giving her my phone number, but then I remember, duh, she's my kid's dentist.

I paused the show once again and my attitude perked up.

"I know, I haven't seen you in what? Since this morning," I chuckled, and she giggled. "What can I do you for?" I asked, trying to be funny.

"Well, I was wondering if you would be up for a beach day on Sunday? We can camp out next to one of the firepits, cook hot dogs, roast marshmallows; the whole shebang."

Her kids were friends with my kids, and because of that we went to a lot of the same functions. I guess I must have started acting like a douche to her at one of those get-togethers, because we really did not have much to do with each other otherwise.

"That sounds good. Uh, who'll be coming?" I asked.

"Just me, my husband and our kids," she said. "Oh, my hubby says he'll bring the firewood."

I do not know why but I was kind of hoping her husband was not coming.

"Do you mind if I take my ex's kids with us? She is going to be watching them for me on Saturday with her husband. I figure I could give them a little break, also."

"Oh, I don't see why not. I'll pack some extra food for them. How many kids are we talking about?"

"Just my three kids, and her two," I said, "and of course me."

"Great!" she said, "Look forward to it," and hung up.

So I called Simone back and let her know my plans for Sunday.

"Oh, that would be great, Mikey. Tom and I haven't had any 'alone' time in quite a while, if you know what I mean."

Yeah, I knew what she meant, although it made me think of my own monk like conditions. I had not had sex in over four years.

"How about you drop your kids off here after Disney and they can sleep over here. That way you two can..." I suggestively offered.

"Oh, my God. I can try out my new lingerie!" she said.

"Yeah, TMI," I laughed, then hung up.

With Stephy and Ryan out of the house, my kids no longer had to share rooms. I had a five-bedroom place but with Linda using one of the rooms and me in the master, we only had three bedrooms for five kids for a long time. I could have moved to a bigger place, I certainly could afford it, but the kids loved living next to the beach, so they put up with sharing rooms for years.

I got halfway through GOT when would not you know it, another phone call.

"Hey, Mikey," Delilah greeted.

"Hey Di. How's things?" I asked.

Delilah moved in with my mother years ago after her mother died. I never understood why she never found anyone, granted she was a single mom and all but she still had a killer body and although she wasn't rich, she still had enough money from her settlement that she hadn't worked a nine to five job once since I'd known her. Granted she was surprisingly frugal and even clipped coupons, (something her mom taught her).

Still, her living with my mom had been very good for the both of them. They just clicked together. Mom took her to church every Sunday and like Simone, she found Jesus, I guess. Regardless, Di and Mom did everything together, so much so that I suspected there might be something else going on. If that were true, it would totally blow my mind, My super-conservative Christian mother, a lesbian. Nah, I doubted it; however, I would not be surprised if it were true either.

"Not bad. Hey, your mom's been down in the dumps a lot lately and I think it's time she went on vacation," she said.

I was not surprised by her manipulation. Delilah did not like spending her own money, but she did not mind spending mine.

"How about you two stay at my timeshare in Maui?" I suggested.

"Oh, that would be perfect!" she screeched.

"OK, I'll book you two some tickets out of Long Beach. JetBlue has a deal with Hawaiian Airlines, and I can use some of my points," I said, heading her manipulations off at the pass.

In some ways she was taking advantage of me, sure. But the way I saw it, she was doing me a favor taking my mother to Hawaii. Not many people are willing to put up with her. And I sure as hell did not want to take her.

"You're the best, Mike. Love you," she said.

"Love you too. And have fun," I said.

I gave up watching GOT and went to bed instead.

*

I decided to go running the next morning at the same time as the day before. I figured if I was going to run with Laura every other day, I might as well get on a schedule. It was only Thursday and I didn't have any meetings or anything going on until Friday.

I started to run to the bridge that took me to PCH when I felt a sharp pinch on my ass. I turned and was surprised to see Laura laughing her ass off.

"OK. Just don't complain if I reciprocate," I said. "Turnabout is fair play."

"We'll see," she smirked, as she started running alongside me.

"I thought you only ran Monday, Wednesday and Friday," I commented. "Not that I'm complaining, mind you," I smiled.

"Usually, but after yesterday I was embarrassed by what shape I was in. I figured it wouldn't hurt to run more," she said, looking me up and down lustily.

"Great," I said, looking at her knowingly. "I don't know what you're so embarrassed about anyway. You look great."

"Ahhh. That's nice of you to say. But I've been feeling kind of sluggish at the office lately anyway. I figured it wouldn't hurt me to use you as a motivation to get in better shape."

"Well, I wouldn't try too hard. I have a lot more spare time than you and I work out at least three hours a day."

"I can tell," she said, once again checking me out.

I did not know how I should feel about it. We were obviously attracted to each other, but I would never interfere with her marriage and I am pretty sure she would never cheat. There was a time when I was used to girls shamelessly flirting with me. But that was decades ago, and I had lost contact with most of the cheerleaders from my clique in high school.

"What do you do, besides run and paddle board?" she asked.

"I teach a couple of martial arts classes twice a week. I lift weights at the gym, do some yoga, and occasionally I'll go surfing when the waves are just right, and the beach is not blackballed," I said.

"How are you still single?" she asked. "I've some sexy single girls that work for me that I'm sure would love your number."

"No thank you. That's the last thing I want is to be set up with a woman my daughter's age," I said. "Besides, I have had a few offers here and there. I'm just not very interested in dating right now."

We finally reached the running path along the beach and we picked up our pace.

"It's been four years," she said. "It's time you got back out there again."

I wanted to tell her to fuck off and mind her own business. I had been doing that for years. The only people I could not ever do that to, were my sisters. Luckily for me, Lorry was a workaholic and Stephanie lived in New York with her husband.

Even with the distance between us, Stephanie was pretty busy, she often worked long hours as a Pediatrician. She still had no children though which made me somewhat concerned considering how much she loved children and used to tell me how much she wanted a large family.

"After Candy passed, I was inconsolable for a couple of years. My sisters and my daughter Stephanie finally confronted me with an intervention of sorts and got me to see a therapist. It's only been recently that she suggested I try dating."

"Have you?" she asked.

"Not much. I've talked to some women on a few dating sites, but they all had so much baggage that I never got past the first date."

"Oh? Give me a 'for instance'," she prompted.

"OK. For instance. I was set to meet this one woman after we were matched, and we traded our questions and finally got to the point of meeting each other. Our first date was a disaster. I don't think she lied directly about anything, but she did lie by omission. She was getting a divorce, fighting for custody of her two kids - which I didn't know about until that date - and she was a recovering overeater."

"What does that mean?" she asked.

"She apparently used to weigh over 300 lbs. and lost 160 lbs. through Overeaters Anonymous. They have a 12-step program and part of the process is having me meet her sponsor. Don't get me wrong, I admired the strength of will it took to lose that much weight. And she was a very pretty woman, but she also had excess skin hanging from her arms and stomach from all the weight loss. I'm not a shallow man, if I were to encounter any one of these issues by themselves it wouldn't be a big deal but all of them together was just too much."

"That sounds horrible."

"Yeah, and she wasn't the worst one."

I guess she wanted to change the subject, because she asked "What was it like being married to a blonde bombshell? She must have had guys chasing after her all the time."

"She was a gorgeous woman, that's true, but there was no jealousy between us. We only had eyes for each other," I corrected.

"That all sounds so perfect. Too good to be true," she commented.

"Maybe. We were both human and had our problems... All I'm saying is that jealousy wasn't one of them."

"OK. Give me an example of a problem you two fought about," she said.

I felt like I was being interviewed. I knew that could not be the case because she was happily married but it still didn't pass the smell test.

"Before we got married, she was married to someone else and was pregnant with his baby," I said. "But we loved each other and when they divorced, we got married and never looked back... I seemed to love her more every day, never less. But, like every marriage, we had our trials and tribulations; Most of them centered around my son," I said.

"Isn't he your step-son?" she asked.

She looked like she regretted asking and was about to apologize when I held up my hand indicating that it was OK.

"Biologically, he's not my son. I know that and he even knows that. He's a smart kid and he questioned me one day, as to why he had brown hair when both Candy and I had blonde hair. So, I told him what I'll tell you, that although he technically doesn't share my genes, I considered him my son from the day he was born. I loved him so much that I adopted him. So, no he's not my stepson, he's my adopted son and he'll inherit an equal share of my wealth along with all of the rest of my children."

"I see..." she said. "So, what was it about him that was causing so much conflict?"

"He has high functioning autism. And because of that, Candy didn't want to have any more children..."

"She was afraid your children might be autistic," she finished.

"Exactly. It wasn't just that, she wanted to coddle him, and I believed he needed structure and guidance. She didn't think he would ever live a normal life. We fought a lot about the best way to raise him, but ultimately, she let me be the leader and deferred to my judgement - she loved me that much. I think the turning point for her was when she saw how successful he was in sports. Every team he was a part of went on to be champions. Soccer, Baseball, and Basketball - all were number one in their district. At the end of her life she saw him get accepted onto his high school football team. You know what she said?"

I looked at her and saw tears in her eyes, "What?"

"She said, he's just like you. The Unlikely Quarterback. The first day I laid eyes on you wasn't that day at Baja Sonora, it was at football try-outs. I thought at first, this guy doesn't have a chance. But you were so handsome, I thought, if you were to somehow make the team, I was going to rock your world... Now look at our son, following in his father's footsteps. I couldn't be prouder."

"The Unlikely Quarterback?" she asked. "You were a jock?"

"Ha! I mean yeah, I was the backup quarterback not the star. But she called me 'unlikely' because, before I got on the team, I was the biggest nerd in the school. For the longest time, I was an outcast. I was that geeky kid that skipped a couple of grade levels making me smart yet always years younger than my peers. Lucky for me I didn't have bottle glasses or pocket protectors, otherwise things might have turned out much differently."

"I can see that," she smirked, giving me the once over, once again.

After that we pretty much chit-chatted about nothing important.

We were finishing up our run and we were heading to our respective houses when I stopped her to invite her to paddle board with me.

"If you would like, tomorrow would be a great day for paddle boarding," I said, suggestively.

"Oh, that sounds great, but I will be working all day at a soup kitchen in Long Beach," she said, sounding disappointed.

"Oh yeah? Which one?" I asked.

"You probably never heard of it. It's one of the smaller ones called Lillian's," she said.

I started laughing.

"What's so funny?"

"That was Stephy's biological Grandmother's soup kitchen - before Lillian died that is. I used to work there myself every week," I chuckled at the irony.

"Why did you stop?" she asked.

"I don't know. Life, I guess. After Candy died, I stopped doing a lot of things. I stopped teaching and mentoring my Jujitsu students. I stopped working at the soup kitchen... for a while I gave up on life."

"What's stopping you now?" she asked.

"Nothing," I answered, truthfully.

"Good then come with me. I could use some backup," she said.

"Are they shorthanded?" I asked. "Last I heard they had plenty of volunteers."

"How would you know?" she asked.

After Lillian passed, her trust ran out of funds. I loved Lillian, and so did Candy, so we swooped in and took it over. After things improved, I gave the business back to Simone.

"My ex-girlfriend, Simone, runs it. She took over after her grandmother passed," I said, hiding the fact that I was the number one donor.

I guess if I said something it would make me look better but I guess those Sunday school lessons I had when I was younger still affected me. "Simone is my oldest daughter's biological mother."

"You mean THAT Simone?... Is Stephy's mom?" she gasped, in sudden realization.

"It's a small world," I commented.

"No shit," she said, and we both laughed. It was so not like her to curse.

"Well, if you do come with me you won't be working with Simone anyway. So, no excuses," she said.

"OKaaay. What exactly will I be doing?"