The Unspoken Society Pt. 04: Members

"Eric too. We'll have to suss out where that came from."

We walked back and got caught up on studying and other things over the rest of the weekend. Of course, we left a little time for private lovemaking, and it continued to burn bright in the face of all the other things going on.

I saw Monica later in the week and fell into step beside her.

"Traci tells me that I have a second girlfriend."

Monica blushed. "I hope you don't think—"

"—No. But I like teasing you. And I think she's kind of right."

"Traci is so perceptive. Okay, when Eric and I were first brought into the club, we also had a mentor couple that became more than mentors. We essentially put ourselves in their hands, like you are doing, and they enriched our lives greatly. They encouraged us to do the same if we could. So, we were super excited when you and Traci gave your trust to us. We have a lot of plans for you."

She stopped and looked at me.

"But, Justin, I kind of got carried away. So did Eric. We just synced with you two so quickly. So, Traci is right. I didn't plan on it, but I think of you like a boyfriend. Is that okay?"

"Yeah, Monica. I care for you a lot. Traci and I have a strong relationship, and we discussed this with each other. We're cool. But you have to understand that I give away a piece of my heart to a girlfriend. You have a piece, Monica. I'm going to think of you all the time. So use it well."

"You love me, don't you?"

"Yes. I've told Traci that I'm too inexperienced to really know what love means. But to the extent that I know what I'm doing, I love you, Monica. I always have, but it's come to the surface in the past few days. Especially when you peered into my soul last Friday night."

Monica pulled me close and hugged me. She whispered into my ear.

"Justin, I love you too. And I love Traci. So you do have another girlfriend. Maybe even desperately dependent—is that how she put it? So I'm yours, and Eric's, and Traci's. Does that make sense?"

"A lot of sense, Monica." I got a gleam in my eye. "So, does that mean you're going to beg?"

She pulled back and looked straight into my eyes.

"Oh, I'll beg all right, Justin. So will you."

"Well, let me start right now. I'm begging, you, Monica. Take care of me, and Traci. We are innocent and trusting in so many ways. We will follow you and Eric. We will care for you two as girlfriend and boyfriend."

"Justin. You and Traci are so trusting. And that's why you're so demanding. I will try to live up to your trust. Eric feels the same way. Remember Traci in the dungeon Friday night? She took over. So we're trying to mentor a couple who are naturals."

She started walking again.

"Justin, I'm going to blame you for what happened Friday night. Yes, I laid on the seduction, but it went out of control as soon as I looked into your eyes. I now know what happened with the erotic meltdown at your club interview, and I totally understand what happened with our resident good-girl Brianna. Justin, you and Traci are dangerous. You just open up to people and take them way further than they planned, and they love it. So, you and I are more than I expected. I'm not in Traci's way, but I'm your girlfriend too."

"I know, Monica. And I'm happy you are. Although now I have to please two women in my life. One was hard enough."

Monica laughed. "Baby, you have to please every woman in the club. That's the dark side we didn't mention before you committed. And all of us women have learned high standards. You might have been able to keep your girlfriend in the dark, but now she's going to learn everything about what to expect."

I laughed ruefully. "I guess I never thought about that."

"How could you, with our interview girls fucking your brains out, and your own girlfriend attacking you as well? But don't worry, we'll teach you how to please us. And we'll teach you how to make your little girlfriend even more desperately dependent."

"Now we're talking!"

Monica punched me in the arm. "I figured that would get you going, you goat. Anyway, I wanted to ask you a couple of things. First, I want to more seriously mentor Traci—just the two of us. I will learn more about her in the process. Do you trust me to advise her, and you, based on what I know about each of you? Do you trust me to suggest some things to her, or you? Do you have any boundaries on how I work with you as a couple? Think about it for a minute before you answer."

I walked along for a while, thinking. Were there any boundaries? Traci's "time to fly" discussion floated around in my mind.

"Monica, when we put ourselves completely in your hands, we meant it. I'm going to trust you and say no boundaries. Maybe there's somewhere that we won't want to go, but I'm okay with you pushing to broaden our horizons. And I trust that you want the best for our relationship, so go ahead and use what you learn about us."

"Thank you, Justin. Now, I also have a request, and it's big. If I'm your second girlfriend, I want girlfriend privileges. This goes beyond the club. I want your consent to talk to Traci about this. Like right now, I'm hot and bothered talking to you about all this stuff. I want to take you back to my room and have my way with you. As a girlfriend, I don't ask permission. And, I expect that Eric is going to ask the same thing of you. If Traci is his second girlfriend, he's going to make love to her when the mood strikes the two of them. Again, we're not here to get in between you two. But, if I'm your girlfriend, there's an emotional connection, and I'm going to act on it. Are you okay with that? Do you really want me for a girlfriend? I can also just be your sexy mentor and playmate."

She continued. "Don't answer now. Talk it over with Traci. We actually didn't expect this level of intimacy with you two. We're not even sure what it means. So we won't be crushed if you decide on a 'good friends with benefits' relationship with us. I know that a girlfriend/boyfriend relationship brings a lot of complexity. Like right now. We're having this relationship conversation—the type that all boyfriends dread."

I laughed. "And what is our anniversary first date? I better get that straightened out now."

Monica stopped walking. "What do you think?"

Suddenly, I wasn't laughing anymore. Monica had my full attention.

"When we looked into each other's eyes that night. That's when I knew."

"You better believe it, boyfriend. Be very careful with your decision about this. I'm not Traci. You are going to have to figure me out, too. Some things are more important to me, some things less. I think you just figured out that I want you invested in our relationship. You had better know when I'm sharing my soul with you."

Monica started walking again.

"See what I mean about complexity? I know this is getting deep pretty fast, but I don't take this girlfriend stuff lightly. So, Justin, just to make things clear, we talked about two separate things. The first was me corrupting your girlfriend. And I got the feeling that you were all in on that."

"All in."

Monica laughed. "Smart boy. The second is us really being in a relationship. Yes, it would be secondary to your primary relationship with Traci, but it is still a relationship. I expect emotional connection. Is that what you want? Is that what Traci wants? Remember, you get to fuck me either way."

"But I only make love with a girlfriend."

"Well said. But love is complicated. Neither one of us knows where this will go."

I walked for a while, thinking about that. Then a thought popped up.

"What about you, Monica? What do you want?"

"About time you asked that question. What do you think?"

I walked a little more. Then, it hit me.

"You want a relationship, or you wouldn't be talking about it. But it's a big step. Even you can't foresee where it will go. You're trying to get that across to me. Traci joked that you'll become my 'work wife,' but this goes deeper. And she's in this just as much as we are. If you and I are in a relationship, it affects her. It's not just that some of my love will go to you. It's that my love for her will change."

"Justin, now you understand why I want this relationship. You get me, and you get Traci. At least after a little prodding. But it lights my fires to be around that kind of man. I get all the sex I want. I only get true intimacy from Eric. That's enough, but suddenly I have the opportunity for more. And I may take it, if all the other implications work out."

She stopped.

"Justin, you need to go, think this through, and have a discussion with your girlfriend. I don't want to go any deeper on this subject until we bring her into it. I already feel a little guilty."

I looked up into her conflicted eyes. "I understand, Monica."

I gave her a hug, which she returned tightly. Then I walked off and immediately texted Traci.

Can I share a walk with you and then take you to dinner? Stuff to talk about

A boy wants to have a "talk" with me? I can't pass that up

"Hey, boyfriend!" Traci said when she opened the door.

"Hey, girlfriend," I answered, giving her a big hug.

We set out for the park.

"Two things to talk about, Traci. I saw Monica earlier today. She asked if she could 'fully' mentor you." I made air quotes with my hands. "I think that means she will get you to spill a lot of things, and she will evolve what she does based on what she learns. And she will be stronger with her suggestions to us. I said I'm okay with that, so expect her to talk to you about it."

"Not enough to ensnare you—she wants both of us, huh?"

"Pretty badly from her body language. And she asked me if there were any boundaries. I said no—that we may decide not to do something, but she was free to suggest anything."

Traci laughed. "Thanks for the warning. Yeah, I'm okay with it. Kind of figured something like that would happen after we put ourselves into their hands and all that."

"The next thing is a deeper discussion."

"Than turning your mentor loose to corrupt me?"

"Yeah." I took a few steps. Traci knew me well enough to know the meaning of a pause like that. And I think she suspected what I was going to say. I just spit it out.

"Monica said that if she's going to be a second girlfriend, she wants girlfriend privileges."

"Oh, and what are those?"

"We didn't spend a long time on it, but it boils down to two things. She doesn't want to ask permission to have her way with me, and she wants a relationship."

"A relationship." Traci walked some more, thinking. I knew I needed to give her some space. And I knew that the sex part was no real issue, but the relationship part was huge.

"Justin, I've got a request for you, and it's big."

"Of course, Traci."

"I need you to tell me everything going on in your head and heart right now. All of it. Don't hold back from fear. The truth will set you free. Anything else will get you into real trouble. And this is about you. I don't care about what Monica wants. I care about what you want. And I care about your feelings for Monica and myself. So tell me everything: what you are feeling, what you think she is feeling, and what you think I am feeling. I'm putting you on the spot."

"Wow, Traci, that's hard. I'll do it, but can you give me some grace?"

"I'm your awesome girlfriend, Justin. Yes, I understand this is hard. I'll help you as much as I can. But you need to figure out your heart. I'm here to help. And before you start, I just want to say thanks for talking to me about this so soon. Of course Monica let me know that your discussion occurred. Thanks for coming over right away, before you figured out a pretty way to wrap up the story for me. I'm also figuring out my heart. We need to do it together, but you need to go first."

"Okay. I'll start with the easy stuff. I don't think you're that bothered by Monica having sexual girlfriend privileges. We never discussed it, but I think we both kind of expected something like that to happen. And I expect the same with you and Eric. We trust each other enough to keep that in the right place and avoid harming our own relationship."

Traci walked along, her vibes saying obviously.

"Now, the harder stuff. I guess I'll start with the fact that I'm already in a relationship with Monica."

"You can say that again."

"And you've known for a while, even when I didn't."

"Getting warmer."

"And you've been waiting for me to figure it out."

"Bingo!"

"And now you want me to come to terms with what it means."

"Very close. I want us to come to terms with what it means."

"Good call. This is about the two of us."

"Exactly."

"So I'll start with what I think a relationship with Monica means. It means I care what she thinks. I'm emotionally available and connected to her. She has a piece of my heart. When she feels something, I feel it too. We have intimacy together. I miss her when she's gone. We don't just have sex, we make love together. And we discuss and work on the relationship together."

"That's pretty serious, Justin. You're telling this to your girlfriend, you know."

"I know, Traci. You and I have an incredible relationship, so I'm not holding back."

"Keep going."

"And if I'm honest, I've been doing all those things with Monica already."

"Yes?"

"And you've been giving me the space to figure this out. You care a lot—enough to take that risk. This is bigger than the club, and Monica is more than a playmate."

"Now tell me what you think she wants."

"I'm not sure she completely knows—the heart is driving, and we never fully understand that. I think she wants the same things I described about a relationship. She's willing to go down this road, even with the risks, because our hearts want to."

"And what do you want, Justin? How does this look to you?"

"Scary. I don't want to mess up our relationship." I sighed. "But my heart wants it also."

"I want you to define this 'it' more carefully. Let's go over to that table and share some eye contact."

She led me over and sat beside me, turning fully to face me. We locked eyes. Hers looked intensely into mine. I turned mine over to my heart.

"I love you, Traci."

Her eyes jumped, giving a fleeting glimpse into a galaxy of emotions. Then she clamped them down again.

"Interesting time to tell me that."

"I turned things over to my heart. It just came out." Another jump of the eyes.

"I believe you. Keep going."

"And I have a love for Monica. You don't want me to give you some reassurance that I will always love you more. You want our hearts to bond together. If we have that kind of love, it will carry us through anything else, including loving others."

"We always have love for others, Justin. Family, friends, sometimes coworkers."

"It's about how we nurture our own love. That's what truly matters."

Her eyes opened, and I saw her love for me pour out.

"Yes, Justin. That's what I want for us."

"You want this level of connection all the time."

"What girl doesn't?"

I took her in my arms and hugged her. She responded. Then she pulled back and looked into my eyes.

"I love you, too, Justin."

We stared into each other for a long time, giving our hearts full control. I went on an exhilarating ride.

Finally, Traci broke the contact. Then she got a grin.

"It's not enough that you make your poor, innocent girlfriend do anything you want. It's not enough that she lets you bang other girls. You get a second girlfriend, and you want her to bless the relationship. She's a pitiful excuse for a girlfriend."

"I am tough on a girl."

"Then you let her see into your heart, and you tell her you love her. She can't help herself. She's lost."

"In her own way, she's tough on a boy. She gets him to confess everything."

"Finally figuring that out, are you? Damn, boyfriend, you need to keep up."

I laughed. "I'm lost. I love my poor, innocent girlfriend. She says I can do anything, but she knows she can get anything she wants."

"But she doesn't know what she wants, baby. She's innocent, remember? But she thinks she can figure it out with her boyfriend. If he really loves her."

"He really loves her."

"So open up with her, boyfriend. That's what she really wants. She'll give away her innocence. She'll give away everything, if she can get your heart."

"She needs to help her boyfriend offer it over."

"Oh she will, boyfriend. Just let her in. Trust her enough to let her guide you. Be a man, but let her be a woman."

"I like the sound of that." And I did. Traci was the woman for me.

"I love the sound of that."

"Let's start walking again, and let me take you to dinner."

We walked a while, then Traci bumped my hips with hers.

"Justin, most couples go their entire lives and never have that level of connection. I know—women talk to me. So if it takes a second girlfriend to get there, I'm good with that."

"Traci, we can get there without the second girlfriend..."

"Relax, Justin. Remember, it's about us. Let me rib you about her a little bit. You care for her. I know that. I always have. But you're sharing your heart, with me, and with yourself. I care for her too, Justin."

"Thanks for being you, Traci."

"The most awesome girlfriend in the world?" I nodded.

She walked a little more.

"You know why you're an awesome boyfriend?" I shook my head.

"Baby, you didn't paint me as the jealous, needy girlfriend. You told me what I already knew about Monica, then you respected me enough to focus on our relationship, not some assurance that you thought I needed. You care about me at a deeper level than just appeasing my anxieties. That's what your poor, innocent girlfriend is looking for. She puts up with you taking her to the dark side—in fact she kind of likes it—because you really care for her. Keep that up, and she will love you always."

"She kind of likes the dark side?"

"Did she say that? She's too trusting."

"Or she's a goddess in innocent clothing."

I heard Traci's musical laugh.

"So you love me, huh?"

"Yeah, innocent goddess, I do."

"Be careful, baby. No goddess is innocent."

"I love you just the way you are."

Traci smiled.

"Do something for me?"

"Of course, baby."

"Let me speak with Monica first? I'd like to work out a few things with her before we miss the opportunity."

"I think she would like that herself. She felt a little guilty when we parted."

"I can set her mind at ease. But I also want the ability to gang up on you."

"Uh-oh."

"Two girlfriends, Justin? Who know and like each other? You are so screwed, in every sense of the word."

"I guess I'll wait to accept my fate."

"Won't you?" All of the sudden, Traci lost the playful banter and got shy.

"I have one other request."

"Go ahead, when you're ready."

"Justin, I don't know how to say this, but we've been kind of innocent together? In bed?"

"And I've loved it."

"I kind of want to keep that up? We've been slowly exploring each other, you know?"

Suddenly, it hit me, and my cock lurched.

"Traci, Monica has a rule that she and I don't do anything that you and I haven't done. I think she sees some of that innocence in us, and she doesn't want to spoil our discoveries together. And I know there are things you've hinted at, and I've been taking my time on them. It's just what you said. I love exploring things together with you. I kind of want to draw out the fun of learning about each other. Traci, you are both innocent and passionate, and that's a sexy combination. But don't worry, I want to fully explore all of your secret desires."

"And I want to explore yours, Justin. Like your little video. I wouldn't have thought to do that myself, and I loved it. Kind of to an embarrassing level."

"You loved it that much, huh?"