The Vanilla Cake Club

I felt Noah put his arm around me for comfort, "My grandfather didn't talk about Raquel to us much after his initial meeting with her. I didn't find out until much later that Raquel wasn't a woman."

***

{I met another man, he put his arms around me. He wouldn't find out until much later about me.}

***

Living with Kirsten was getting harder each passing day. She seemed to be ignoring me and always mad. She went through phases where she wouldn't talk to me for days, she has done that since we were first married so I wasn't too surprised about that. I had a feeling she was slightly bipolar. I couldn't wait until Wednesday came and she could hang out with the people at PWC. She never talked about it anymore but I could tell it became the focus of her week. When I talked to Ronnie about it she told me Kirsten didn't talk to her either, she actively avoided her.

When the next Saturday came, Kirsten had been gone the entire day. It was nice getting dressed for the club in a nice quiet house. I couldn't wait to show off my new breast forms so I wore a dress exposing a lot of cleavage. I couldn't wait until Rosalie sees the new me, she would be so proud. She told me going to the club would start to make me more comfortable in my own body and mind, she was right.

I was brushing my long wig in front of my new full-length mirror. My dark little room got a major upgrade in the last couple of weeks. Between the new furnishings and sundries, it was a completely different space. I loved it, but Kirsten would make fun of me when she spied inside of it. She told me I was becoming too girly and it was sick and disgusting. She was constantly slamming my door. I guess she wasn't learning about acceptance at her meetings.

I was checking my dress waiting for the town car to arrive. I had on my new black cocktail dress. It had spaghetti straps and showed off my breasts very nicely. There was a slit upfront at the hem leading right below my black satin panties. I had on beige pantyhose and five-inch black platform pumps. My nails and lips were dark red and I had longer than usual eyelashes, my makeup looked very dramatic.

I had a bunch of new information to share with Meg and Rosalie, I was skipping around the room I couldn't wait to tell them.

***

Rosalie and I were in the back of a dark blue car heading to the Hahn House.

"Do you know those two portraits in the stairwell at the club?"

"Sure, of Raquel and Loretta?"

"Those are them," I smiled at Rosalie, even though I figured she knew what I was going to tell her. "Did you know Raquel was a crossdresser?"

"What? Really? No, I didn't, but it makes sense for them starting the Club and all. Was Loretta a woman?"

"She was, they were Meg's grandparents on their fathers' side."

***

Once we got to the house I was looking up at the two portraits. Meg came up and intercepted me before I went inside. "So I hear you got news?"

"I do. I learned quite a bit this week."

"That's so great, we have to find some time this week to chat, but right now there is a man in my office that wants to see you."

"Oh no. Am I in trouble? I'm being sent to the office." I giggled.

Meg's office was right next to the kitchen, and on the way, so many men, and some of the girls complimented me on my dress. It made me feel so good, showing off my breasts.

When we opened the door a man turned around. It was Noah. "Hi Donna, I'm sorry, I didn't realize there was a party going on." Meg and I looked at each other and we giggled. "I didn't have your number, and I, um, thought maybe we could go out one day. I also found this."

I couldn't believe it, he was asking me out. This was a first and he was being so cute about it. I then looked at the note he gave me. It was written on notepaper from the Lutheran Church on 6th Street.

I smiled up at him while he looked me over in my way too formal dress. "Okay. I'll give you my number, maybe." I was trying to be cute.

Meg was loving this interaction, she had a sly smile on her face. "You know, why don't you two do something today, it's so beautiful out." I was getting nervous again but once Noah put his hand on the small of my back and led me out I was fine.

"I'll take care of the cake situation!" She yelled after me.

I had made a deal with two of the local bakeries to bake cakes and pies for us, no more supermarket surprises for this club, only the best. I also got such a crazy discount when they found out whatever didn't get taken home was going to go to the soup kitchen at one of the churches. It was a win-win, and someone would even come to pick them up. Twice as easy as before.

***

I saw Rosalie as we were leaving and I introduced her to Noah, I was hoping she would tell Ronnie about my date, my first one.

"This was a great surprise," Noah said as we got into his car. "Anywhere special you would like to go?"

"No anywhere is fine with me, I'm very easy." I was.

We ended up at a restaurant, Le Jardin, near the Passaic River, Noah told me Jonathan used to come here. That sat us near a window with a view of the river, it was early still and not too crowded. "I have pictures of this place, I want to show you."

He pulled six pictures from an envelope and laid them in front of me. One was black and white the rest in color and all of them were pictures of two men.

"This is Randall," He said pointing at the man next to Jonathan. "That's Raquel."

I looked closer, if this was her male side she looked completely different. I studied the pictures and they were definitely all of the same two people.

"I called my mother and she said they went out some nights together, this was their favorite restaurant. My mother didn't know at the time that this was also Raquel." He pointed to two pictures of them sitting at a table. One of them with the staff. "They were even in some local club together. Raquel would only stay at the house when she was dressed up. She never left her residence as a woman.

I looked up at him, Raquel was like me, she was probably like a lot of crossdressers we tended to hide in our closets. "Oh, that's a little sad." I then remembered the note, I put it in my pocketbook. It was dated September 1st, 2001, it was a reservation for the wedding ceremony in a couple of weeks. Only four people were going to come.

I looked up again at Noah, I was feeling very sentimental, I felt a little emptiness in my heart. They couldn't legally get married but they found someone in the church that would at least perform a ceremony. That was so nice. The next day I sent the church flowers and made a Donnation. I put everything in Raquel and Loretta's names.

***

I wiped the tears from my eyes. I decided I was going to forget about the two lovers for a while and enjoy Noah's company. After we ate we went for a walk around Montclair. Usually, when I come into town I run into a store in my heels and run out, I never linger. Walking around with Noah was so much different, everyone just saw a man and a woman window shopping, it was nice. I didn't even mind being so dressed up.

It was dark when Noah was driving me home, we decided we would do this again and I finally exchanged numbers with him. When we got to my house I noticed there were a lot of lights on so I had him move a couple of houses away. He wanted to walk me in but I didn't think it was a good idea, I didn't want Kirsten seeing me at all, especially not with a handsome man.

"Can I kiss you goodnight?" He asked me. He was being so polite I think if he asked to sleep with me I would have said yes.

I moved closer, "You can." We locked eyes, we were inches away and then he kissed me. Just a light touch of the lips. We pulled away but I felt myself moving closer. He kissed me again, I opened my lips and we started making out in front of the Butterworth's house. I was enjoying a man on my own block. We sat like this for another ten minutes and I was getting excited. I felt my panties getting tight and uncomfortable. I said goodnight and we kissed once more, I pushed my covered breasts into him, I wanted him to dream about my body tonight. This little bit of romance was making me so excited, I couldn't wait to get in my bedroom and take care of myself.

I got out and closed the door, I bent down, felt my breasts sway, and smiled into the open window. "Night."

"Goodnight Donna, see you soon." And he would.

***

I went up the steps and made so much noise with my heels there was no way I could sneak into the house. As soon as I started to head to my room Kirsten made an appearance in the hall, her arms were folded and she had a weird grin on her face.

"Don't you look surprised and extremely girlie? Are you coming back from a wedding, haha?" She was slurring her words, she very rarely had alcohol and when she did, she got drunk quick... and she got mean. Meaner. She once broke all of my wine glasses, one by one, because I wouldn't give her another drink after she threw up on the living room rug after a night out. I was finding the glass for weeks. "What's with that hair, did it grow overnight like your fucking tits, haha." She then grabbed my arm roughly and dragged me into the living room. I tripped on my heels against the wall.

There was a man on the couch. He got up and looked at me, focusing on my breasts.

"This is the fag? God, I never would of believed it." He moved closer, it was Buddy, Kirsten's ex-husband. She always kept in touch with him, I think he was a mechanic and he would maintain her car when she asked. Sometimes his truck was parked in front of the house but I don't think he had ever come in before, at least not with me here.

I went to turn back to my room but Kirsten stood behind me. I felt too exposed in this dress. "Say hello Donna. Buddy didn't believe you wore dresses."

I had to look at him, I never liked him. He was nasty and he had a terrible mouth. He never said anything good about anyone, especially me. Kirsten pushed me. "Go give Buddy your hand, don't be shy."

I moved slowly closer, I was a couple of inches taller than him in my heels, but he was so much wider and heavier. He put his dirty hand on my breast and I pulled away.

"Aww, Donna is a little shy." Kirsten snickered, then burped. "Haha."

He then held me with his two hands around my arms holding me so I couldn't move. He moved his face inches from mine. "Kirsten says you wear too much makeup and too much perfume, she wants it to stop. If she wanted to live with a woman she would of become a lesbian." he laughed.

"Stop being an asshole," Kirsten told him. "Tell her the new rules of the house."

He pulled me even closer, he smelled like the cheap Clan MacGregor Whisky he was drinking. "No more fucking dresses, faggot, only on Saturday for those stupid things you go to. Starting tonight you dress like a guy. A gay guy, haha." He then pushed me into Kirsten we fell against the wall, I jogged to my room and locked the door. I heard the two of them cursing at me, hopefully, they will get drunk and pass out.

That's exactly what they did.

***

{I had a date but I didn't tell my husband, I was being a little naughty. I didn't get much sleep last night thinking about our time together.}

***

I slept in the sexiest little nighty that I had, over the last couple of weeks my wardrobe had grown. I finally could wear a different piece of lingerie every night if I chose to. I wasn't going to listen to Kirsten's ex, actually, I was going to ramp up my sexiness and sexuality. That was weird, why would she even bring him over. He was so nasty. I kept the door locked and the music on all night. I fantasized about Noah.

The next morning I texted Rosalie, I wanted to talk to her. I didn't want to see Kirsten and Buddy. But I did. Rosalie drove over and texted me she was outside, I tip-toed through the living room to leave through the back door and saw the two of them naked from the waist down on the couch. The Clan MacGregor was empty, he must have brought it because I would never serve such cheap crap. I grabbed my bag and quietly went out the door.

I told Rosalie and Ronnie what had happened when I got in their car. I started to cry, not because of Kirsten but because I had friends that would make me feel better. We spent the day together, they let me cook them dinner. I didn't want to go home.

***

{The neighbors were fighting so I went to my friends' house and they let me make dinner.}

***

The next couple of days I avoided Kirsten. Every time she saw a glimpse of me she told me to go change and threatened me with the ex. For some reason I felt the heaviness of my gender dysphoria on my shoulders again, I was fully dressed and made up and it made an abrupt appearance. I didn't understand.

That week, I ended up going to a few jobs that I had as Donna, I didn't change and I dressed the way I felt. I didn't even explain it to my clients, I think they just assumed I was someone new. It was fine. It was better than fine, there was absolutely no conversation about it. When I got home and put my feet in my wonderful heels, up on my coffee table I felt fantastic especially since Kirsten wasn't home.

I called Noah and told him about my day. He came over and we went for a drive.

***

It was nice with no agenda or a plan we just drove around and listened to music. Of course, I was overdressed. I had a long cotton gown, which hid my four-inch sandals. The dress was pink and filled with flowers, I was lightly made up and my hair was draped over my right shoulder. I was so glad Kirsten wasn't home to witness my nursery school teacher look again.

It was getting late and he drove me home, Kirsten still wasn't home so we parked in front of the house. He shut off the car and the lights, we only glowed from the amber of the street light. I slid closer to him as he put his arms around me.

"I really like spending time with you, we should do more research together." He teased.

"Mmm, maybe, but sometimes a girl just wants to let loose." I smiled at him with my perfect pink lips and then he kissed me. My hands went on his chest as his hands went around my back. I felt him run his fingers on my bra strap. I always dreamed about goodnight kisses, and sexy phone calls, and dinner with candlelight. I was totally a romantic. We played with each other's tounges in the dark. His hands even visited my breasts. I was wishing they were real, though I did make a couple of oohs and ahhs to sound like I actually felt his handiwork.

He then nuzzled my neck, he pulled me close and I felt my thigh move on top of his leg, my 'clit' was tucked but it rubbed against his leg and I started to get more excited.

He pulled me into him again. "I am so happy we met. All I can think about is when am I going to see you again. Even when I am looking right into your eyes."

I was staring at him. "You have to start living in the moment." All of a sudden I started breathing heavier and I then started to cum. I couldn't believe him talking like that would make me so excited. I couldn't imagine that a man wanted to see me again and again. I kissed him harder than before. My hands were running through his hair. My lips were on his, my tongue was exhausted, I slowly disengaged from him, what the hell just happened? "Oh, I wasn't ready for that." I came down from my orgasmic bliss and started rubbing his hard cock through his pants. I slipped in when I undid the zipper, the longer nails were no longer a deterrent. I squeezed and played with him as we kissed again. His face went into my hair and neck and I felt his cock throb and then he was cumming. I was making him cum. I was very happy as I pushed and felt his sperm spread on my palms. I cleaned him up with a tissue, I wanted to taste him but I didn't want him to think I was too much of a slut. I snuck just the tiniest bit into my mouth.

I had my cheek on his chest while I lightly scratched him with my long pink nails. I could feel his face in my hair. I decided after tonight no more wigs, I was going to get extensions or something. It was making me nervous thinking the wig was going to move, even though it had a little glue and a bunch of bobby pins in.

I was thinking how exciting this night was, all I needed was a drink, dinner, and a kiss goodnight and it brought me over the edge. It totally turned me on more than anything that had happened at the club. I had to find a way to make this my life, I needed a complete change.

"When was the last time you made out in the car?" I asked him, trying to be cute.

He chuckled, "Well since I took over the house four years ago, I find most women prefer my couch."

"Well, I'm not most women. I like maneuvering around a steering wheel, I'm all for a bit of an obstacle." I giggled and I stayed on his chest, feeling the warmth of him on my cheek. My life and everything else was running so smoothly... until Wednesday night.

***

{We made out in my new boyfriend's car, we both had incredible orgasms, he told me he was happy we met.}

***

Kirsten headed off to the PWC meeting. I had the night to myself to relax, it had been a tense week at home. Kirsten was hardly ever here and when she was she was usually pissed off at something. But I don't think it was mainly me.

Rosalie and I had gone shopping today and I couldn't wait to try on my new jeans and long maxi dresses and then play with my new Ulta makeup collection. I even ordered a vanity, no more balancing my makeup on the bathroom sink. I heard a noise, a car screeched outside in front of the house.

I heard the front door open, Kirsten was home very early. "Get the fuck out here!" I heard her call while I was brushing my hair. I then heard her outside the door. She started banging. "Get out here, can't you hear me. Fuck!" She kicked the door a couple of times, the molding was cracking. I heard her retreat back to the living room.

Something happened, I was wondering if Buddy's wife found out about the two of them. I opened the door, I didn't want to walk out, I was wearing a long red-flowered dress and I knew she would throw abuse at me. I called instead. "What's the matter?"

She got in the hall and started walking toward me very fast. She was shaking her head as she glared at me. "What did you tell Ronnie?" She pushed open the door while I held on, knocking me off my heels. "What did you tell her about Buddy?"

I was on the floor, "I just told her what happened."

She kicked at me. "What the fuck is wrong with you, shit, this is so fucked up!"

"What? What happened? Why are you so angry?"

She looked at me with such contempt, I knew I wasn't ever going to talk to her again if I didn't have to.

"I got banned from the fucking PWC meetings, what is wrong with you? Mind your own business!" She went into her bedroom she was making so much noise. I hid back in my room, she was screaming and I didn't understand the big deal. She needs those meetings to vent? There had to be others she could go to. Ronnie said she didn't associate with her at the meetings anymore anyway and Kirsten was acting a little paranoid.

I started hearing a crash and breaking glass. I stayed in my room until I heard her leave with the car. It screeched back down the block, thank god it was late and no kids were out.

I went into the living room, all my new wine glasses were broken again, actually, all of my glasses from the bar were piles of dust. There was a hammer on the bar and a broken bottle of Midori. Green and glass littered the tile. I was going to clean up and went into the kitchen, there was more glass on the table. Kirsten left her calling card along with all the lights on and the door open.

I called Rosalie

***

Fifteen minutes later I was at her house, I drove this time, she made me take her somewhere. Ronnie had the car.

We were sitting a couple of houses down from the Hahn House, there were cars parked all around the fence just like every other Saturday. All the lights were on, and I'm sure there were many people behind the doors.