There Must Be A Mistake Ch. 22

"Don't worry about it Gordon, neither have I. It was going to be my question when you finished talking to your brother."

"I didn't know what else to call it dad, but it's a weird thing when you watch it at work."

"How did you see it working Richard?"

"The scientists moved Hubble to look at the Black Hole, because they believe the Sagittarius 'A' Star is going to collapse, within the next 10 light years or less. When it does, the explosion is going to be so massive, it will double the size of the Supergiant or more. They want to watch it happen."

"I wouldn't want to be anywhere in that quadrant when the shockwave hits. It will destroy everything in its path, including planets."

"You're right dad. All eight ESA telescopes will be focused on that area of the sky, when Hubble confirms the explosion has occurred. The Europeans will be looking to see what the shockwaves do to the planets and the stars in that system. They will be looking not only for the damage that is done, but also for the change to their orbits. It could change the entire Sagittarius cluster."

Gordon got that grin on his face, and I immediately said, "Don't even think about it."

"Come on dad, it will be like a walk in the park."

"That's one hell of a walk Gordon."

"Dad if Delicious can get us up to Warp Eight, we point the nose of the ship directly at the Supergiant. We can turn our antennas towards it, and record everything that's happening. We can transmit it back to earth in real time.

We can plan our approach to stop at 30 trillion miles from the Star. If it hasn't exploded by that time, like a Kansas tornado, we turn 125 degrees from it, and run like hell, while still transmitting back to earth."

Jennifer said, "Come to me Richard."

Richard stood in front of her.

"Yes mommy?"

"I want you to count to five and start humming anything you want for 10 seconds, and then you can stop."

"Okay mom, one, two, three, four..."

Jennifer covered Richard's ears tightly and said, "Gordon, you've got giant size brass balls."

When she finished she uncovered Richard's ears.

Everyone in the room was laughing, but Zoie was laughing the loudest. She climbed on Gordon's lap and kissed him.

"Oh my God, not those too?"

Zoie blushed as she nodded her head.

I looked at my wife. "Are you sure we didn't have accidental sex, while you were in college?"

"I'm sure Even. I would remember that elephant trunk of yours even if I were drunk out of my mind. It would've killed me when I was 19."

Zoie put her head into Gordon's shoulder and giggled.

"Girl, you have to stop that. By now you should be quite familiar with the male the species."

"Mom not only is she familiar, she has already taken charge of that area of my body. She took an indelible magic marker and wrote 'Property of Zoie Luck on it.' After we get married she is going to have it tattooed."

I flinched. "That is really going to hurt my son."

"It is okay dad. I've already got it figured out. If we get married late in December, and I keep her in bed until the night of the 24th, I am safe. We have to board 'The Best Luck' first thing Christmas morning, and everyone will be busy completing his or her checklists. There won't be time for me to get a tattoo."

Zoie snuggled against him.

"Sometimes men are so dumb. My mom has two picks. One of them is going to be a tattoo artist."

"I hate you Zoie Schneider."

"You won't when I'm Zoie Luck, and I'm carrying your baby."

"Mom, dad, help me."

"Gordon, I asked you in the drugstore if you were sure about Zoie, and you answered my question, with a question. I'm going to ask you another question, and this time I want an answer. When you saw Zoie for the first time, did you fall in love with her using the big head, or the little head?"

"It was the big head mom. The little head came later, and it came a lot."

"You're disgusting Gordon. I didn't have to know that."

"I thought it would be your next question, so I answered it for you."

"Can we get back to the problem at hand? If we are not going to go to Kepler 62E, what was our next option?"

"We are going to be on the other side of the universe dad. I have to start another search."

Richard asked his brother if he could help in his search for our new home.

"You caused this problem Rich; you should be part of the solution. It's time we tested you out of school; don't you think so dad?"

"How do you feel about that Richard? Would you like to stay in school, with your friends, or start working with us at our laboratory?"

Richard winked at me so his mother couldn't see. "I'd like to work with you in the lab dad, but there is this one little girl I'd like to bring..."

Jennifer yelled, "Oh no you don't. You are not nine years old yet, and I will not have it young man. There is no way on this earth you are going to bring a nine-year-old girl into this house, with the intention of having sex with her."

I clapped my hands and laughed at my wife. Gordon and Zoie played innocent. Jen looked at Richard as he smiled. Jen realized she had been played.

"You are going to get such a spanking."

"Jen what you give our son, I will give to you in spades, hearts, diamonds, and clubs."

"Come here Richard."

"Okay mommy, I'll count to five and hum."

^^^^^^^^

"Fuck you Even."

"Darling, after your rear end is bright red, you will, and for a very long time."

"Way to go dad."

"Shut up Gordon, or I'll take the door off your room."

"It would be okay with us now mom. We are very comfortable with one another. Your problem would be with Richard and Holden. They would get an advanced lesson in sex, at a very tender age."

"What did you do to my wonderful son Even? Logic, that's all I get from him. I never get a straight answer any more. He wraps it around a psychological answer, and ties me in knots. I don't like you. Go to your room, you're being punished for the rest of the day."

"I'll go to bed when Tammy tells me to, and not one second before."

"It's time for you to go back to bed Doctor Luck."

"You're doing that because you heard my wife threatened me."

"You're partially correct, but it has been two hours, and you need your rest, and medication. If you aggravate her anymore, she could become violent, and hurt you severely. I am in charge of your body today, and I don't want that on my record sheet. Bed, Doctor Luck, don't make me say it again."

"Yes warden, I'm on my way. If you need a relaxation session Jennifer, come with me. If not, you are coming with me anyway."

"You're not getting off my shit list that easily."

"How much would you like to bet?"

"We will discuss that later."

"Lily livered-chicken shit."

"If you keep talking to me like that I'm going to bite it off."

"You would break your jaw trying."

"Men, I am surrounded by men. Don't you leave me Zoie; I will hate you forever if you do."

"If you said that to my mom and dad 10 years ago, they would have given you $1 billion."

"You have a lot to learn Zoie. Regardless of how trying a child is, a parent would throw themselves in front of a bus trying to save them."

"Mom, my mother or father would have been driving that bus. I was a bitch on wheels."

"From the day I was introduced to sex, I was the queen of bitches. I could teach you things about sex you never heard of before, and your parents would jump over the railing voluntarily."

"Go inside Gordon, mom and I have to talk."

"Great, because Richard and I have to talk also. Come on little man, let's talk science."

"I'm not so little anymore."

"Okay, I'll just call you Richard from now on."

"You can call me Rich too."

"Anything you want is fine with me brother. Show me what you found on your computer, especially what the 'White Hole' looks like."

As they left the room, I heard, "It really is funny looking. It's like two megaphones. The large ends are facing in opposite directions. The small ends face each other, but they don't touch. That's the weird thing about them. If you fight the force going in, and don't gain enough speed, you can't make the jump from one side to the other. You crash and burn for lack of a better explanation."

"However, if you anticipate entering the Hole, and you are moving at more than light speed, you can make that jump, and come out the other side.

You can estimate where you will exit, but don't plan on it being exact. At this point, the closest I can figure is between five and eight light years away from your predicted exit point. I don't know where, inside the White Hole, you can safely start to slow down.

There is another problem with this form of transportation. Both sides work both ways, and there is no double line separating the flow of traffic. I don't know how it does it. I don't know if it knows.

If you enter one side, and I enter the other, at approximately the same time, and at the same speed, what is going to happen to us when we make that jump in the middle? What is going to happen to us if we are in the same cone going in opposite directions? I don't know.

I do know you do not want to get hit by a space rock after it exits the White Hole traveling at light speed or more. It will ruin your spacecraft, and your day."

"I have a question Rich. Is it worth the risk to go through this thing of yours to see a planet as it gets sucked into a Black Hole, when telescopes all around the world are going to see it?"

"All the best telescopes in the world are going to see this event using x-ray telescopes from Earth. The U.S. has Chandra in space, and it will take the best x-ray pictures of the Sagittarius A Star collapsing into the Black Hole. Then they will have to colorize it using their best guess theory."

"If we do it, we will see it live, and in color. Our telescopes, radar, x-rays, and other devices will record it from less than 100 trillion miles away. It's the difference between a bunt, and a Grand Slam Home Run."

We can send our information back to earth by datalink. It will take a few hundred years to get there, but what they had to color enhance to put together will look like crap compared to what we will send them. If you really want to cut that return time down even more, we can always go back through the 'White Hole' a second time, and hope to come out where we started."

Gordon laughed.

"Mom said I had 'Giant Size Brass Balls.' I have marbles compared to you."

"It feels nice to be compared to you Gordon. I've always looked up to you."

"Richard on your first try, you found something no one else on this planet has ever heard of or seen. You are going to be in all the scientific journals, right along with dad. Close your eyes and think about this: Even Luck, Delicious Luck, Gordon Luck, and Richard Luck. Soon, we will add one more name: Holden Luck. I wish mom could be added to that list. Our whole family would be there. Wouldn't that be wonderful?"

"That would be amazing Gordon, I don't think there's any family in the world that ever had everyone's name listed on scientific journals."

"Where should we start our search? Do you want to look Northeast of Sagittarius, or are we going to come back through the 'White Hole', and continue towards the Kepler's?"

"Let's start in the area of Sagittarius and see what we find. If there is nothing in the Northeast quadrant, we can fly an arc towards the South, and continue to make a complete circle. It's a very big universe Richard; we will find a home for ourselves out there."

"This is very exciting Gordon. Can I go to work with you tomorrow and search the star charts with you?"

"We are going to have to clear that with mom, but since we are going to be testing you out of school soon, I don't think she'll put up a big fight."

Jennifer said, "You are correct Gordon, she will not put up a fight at all. You can take your brother to work with you, and I will make the arrangements with the school board to have them test him out of elementary school and high school."

"Thank you mom, I'm really looking forward to this adventure. This is really going to be cool."

"Well, if it is, make sure to bring a sweater."

"Oh mom, that was terrible. You should be able to do better than that."

"Yes, I could have Gordon, but I wanted to hear you complain. Since I purchased those condoms for you, you've been in too good a mood."

"Zoie has had that effect on me, and I believe I've had the same effect on her."

"If you don't see it young man, I'm sending you to the eye Doctor. She blushes, and smiles all day long. I don't know what she is remembering, but she's having an awful good time, whatever it is. You are good for each other, keep it up and you will keep her smiling."

"It's so new to both of us, we haven't passed page 6 yet."

"You bought a book? How did you get into an adult store to buy a book on sex?"

Gordon said, "We didn't, my sister did it for us. Delicious said it would help us experiment, and understand our bodies better."

Jen yelled, "Even Luck, I am going to kill our daughter. She is having a deleterious effect on our younger generation."

"Are you talking about the book I told her to buy?"

"I'm going to kill you first, and then I'm going to kill our daughter. How could you possibly do it to them?"

"Jen, what is wrong about buying a book for the kids called, "How to Make a Marriage Happy." Its number 18 on the New York Times bestsellers list. I thought it would be good for them."

"Did Delicious get you that book Gordon?"

"Yes mom she did."

"Oh God, I'm sorry I flew off the handle at you. I apologize."

"It's okay mom. Since dad's been sick, you have been under a lot of pressure. He's not easy to deal with all the time. We all love you, and understand what you're going through."

Jennifer ruffled Gordon's hair as she used to when he was young. "My little boy is still in there somewhere. Would you tell him I said hi, and I love him too?"

Gordon kissed his mother. "He knows mom, and if you're not careful, he's going to spank you, again."

Jennifer laughed. She began walking towards the den, and back to me. She stopped before she reached the kitchen.

"No that was too easy. Come here Gordon."

Our son was standing beside her in seconds.

"What's up mom, what's wrong?"

"I want to see that book. I want to see it in my hands now."

"Sure mom, I'll get it."

It was a quick round-trip, and Gordon handed the book to her.

"I apologize again Gordon; I thought I was being played."

"I wouldn't do that to you mom. Dad told you the name of the book, and Delicious brought this book for Zoie and me."

"Thank you Gordon, you can go back to Richard now."

Jennifer continued to the kitchen, stopped for a glass of water, and joined me in the den. She was in the process of sitting down when she yelled, "Gordon get your ass in here."

Zoie and I looked at each other and knew she had finally figured it out.

"What is it this time mom. Richard and I will never get any work done, if I have to keep running up and down the hallway."

"Was that the only book Delicious brought you home yesterday?"

"Of course not, why would you go to a bookstore and only buy one book. I'll bring you in the other one, and the receipt."

Gordon brought back a huge particle physics book and a receipt for two books for $89.68.

"This is it Gordon, there are no more books."

"Mom, Zoie, and I will stay here with dad. You can check our room. Look anywhere you'd like. These are the only two books that are in our room."

"Don't play with me Gordon, I'll go in there and check."

"Mom, please get this over with. Richard wants to start looking at the star charts; and he doesn't understand them well enough to do it without me. Go into our room and tear it apart. Zoie and I will put it back together later. There are no other books in my room."

"I'm going to look."

"Would you like me to help you up?"

"Dammit Even, he's telling the truth. I thought I had him."

"You were hoping your son was lying to you Jennifer? Isn't that a little sad, when you think about it?"

"Don't you start with me too; you are the one that's causing me this nervous breakdown."

"You are free to go Gordon. I promise I will not call you again."

"Just in case you get the itch to check our room, I will leave these two books here in plain sight. You will know where they are at all times, and any other books you find, you can burn."

"Don't be a pain in the ass Gordon, just go, and be with your brother."

"Baby, I think you should come with me. There may be words said between my mother and father that a child of your tender years is not supposed to hear."

"Fuck off Gordon."

"I hope you didn't hear that Zoie."

"Hear what sweetheart?

"Will the two of you get out of here before I start throwing those books at you?"

"If you do throw them mom, please throw the physics book at Zoie. That sucker weighs 11 pounds, and it will hurt."

Zoie grabbed Gordon's ear. "Mister Luck, I have something important to say to you, follow me." She pulled him out of the room while he complained about her holding his hearing mechanism.

She pulled him into their room, closed the door, and kissed him. "Where is the book?"

"It's inside the particle physics book."

"How did you do that?"

"I watched a movie called 'The Shawshank Redemption'. They showed a guy doing it to a Bible so he could hide something in it. I knew our new book was going to cause us trouble, so I took the precaution of bringing home that particle physics book. I used a surgical blade to cut out enough pages for the other book to fit inside it. Thank goodness yesterday was garbage day, and the recycled paper is gone."

"My hero."

"Come with me my love, my brother is waiting to find us a new home. I promised I would be there to show him the way to do it."

"How did you get so smart?"

"I have an advantage. I was born with a photographic memory; and I was brought up by Doctor Even Luck. Anyone who was as lucky as I was, couldn't help but to be ahead of a lot of other people. I got you, didn't I?"

"No you didn't, I got you."

"I am not going to argue that point. Let's join Richard, and go planet hunting."

"Can I have a blue one, please?"

"I can't promise a blue planet, but I do promise it will have an awful lot of green."

Zoie pouted. "My favorite color is blue."

"My favorite color is red, and that is going to be the color of your beautiful behind after I finish using my hand on it."

"I told you that you were going to turn into a pervert, and I was correct."

"You have a luscious bottom, I love kissing, licking, biting, and spanking it. One day I am going to fuck it."

"I knew it, you are a pervert." She ran to the door, opened it, and went to Richard's room for safety.

"Hi Richard, have you found anything new, since your mom called Gordon away?"

"Hi Zoie; I may have found something interesting and scary. The Europeans will have to verify it to see if it's charted already, and how close it will come. This is an asteroid, about 860 kilometers wide, heading this way. I'm looking at the NEO (Near Earth Objects) display, and I had Big Blue run an analysis of the trajectory of this dot here. It's 182 days away, traveling at 24, 260 miles an hour. Blue says it could pass us within 4000 miles of us plus or minus 8%."

Gordon yelled, "Get in here dad, this is important."

I am faster than a turtle, but not as quick as a hare. When I heard Gordon call for me, I started walking towards Richard's room.

My warden said, "Where the hell do you think you're going?"

Thinking quickly, I said, "Bathroom."

"One day Doctor you are going to figure out you can't lie to me. I want to know what your son found too. The next time we have to move this fast, we will do it in a wheelchair, okay?"