Things We Don't Talk About

Some people say that the three things we aren't supposed to talk about in polite society are Sex, Religion, and Politics. Other people add in Money. I admit that bragging about how much money you have is looked down upon in any instance. Yet, Sex, Religion, and Politics are topics that explain who we are.

We can talk about the weather, something that doesn't take any real knowledge to discuss. We can talk about sports. But what do either of those subjects tell us about ourselves or others?

When I tell people that I had sex with another man on my wedding night, and my husband watched, I get mixed reactions. Some people are judgmental of me, and others are judgmental of my husband. But that's who we are. I like having sex with other men and my husband likes to watch.

Every one of us wants to connect with other people. But how can you do that without talking about what's important to you and who you are?

If I tell you that I am agnostic, libertarian, and enjoy having sex with men who aren't my husband, you know a lot about me. And we have a lot we can talk about. If we don't talk about sex, politics, or religion, how could you know any of this about me?

My question is, how can we know anything about another person if we don't know who they are or what's important to them?

I've been told that what people do in the privacy of their bedroom says nothing about who they truly are. I disagree. I say that what people do in private says a lot about what type of person someone is.

In this day and age, politics is one subject that can divide people. Yet, talking about your religious beliefs or your sexual beliefs can bring people closer together. I admit that talking about religion and sexual beliefs can also divide people, too, but not to such an extent.

I enjoy having sex with other men and my husband likes to watch. If we didn't tell other people this about ourselves, how are we supposed to meet people that can fulfill both of our desires?

When it comes to my husband, he's Tantric in his spiritual beliefs. Sex to him is a spiritual thing more than a physical thing. His favorite sexual practice is watching me or other people have sex, not participating himself unless it is with other men-and sometimes with other women.

Let's say that you, my husband, and I just met, and we told you that I like to have sex with other men and my husband likes to watch. What would be your reaction? Whatever your reaction, it would more than likely tell us what your sexual beliefs are, possibly your political affiliation, and most definitely your religious beliefs.

Oddly, the situation would be worse if we met at a nudist resort. As an American society that has the largest pornography industry, we Americans are prudes. And nudists are the worst.

I agree that having sex in public is often wrong, especially at a family-oriented nudist resort. But talking about sex is also seen as wrong as having sex.

We, as a society, tend to look down upon people that look at porn, but we're also afraid of talking about sex, to others or our children.

We openly express our religious and political beliefs at home but rarely are we as open about our sex lives at home, especially around friends, family, or our children.

If anything is true, it's that sex is the one thing that almost everyone wants yet knows the least about.

Where sex, politics, and religion are the most connected is that all three are subjects that people have firm beliefs about. Another thing that connects all three is that in each case we often believe what we've been told by other people.

Think about this . . . if a person were to live on a deserted island, they more than likely would have no political stand nor any religious beliefs. Yet, they would still have sexual desires or needs. We all want to feel good, and sexual stimulation often fulfills that need or desire.

We're not supposed to talk about sex, politics, or religion because conversations about these subjects can become heated. They can also make people feel ashamed or uncomfortable. We're a society that values comfort zones and fears backlash.

My husband and I are proud to be growing old disgracefully. We like to consider ourselves misbehaving royalty. We're proud of our lifestyle. I believe it was Osho that said, "The greatest fear in the world is of the opinion of others. And the moment you are unafraid of the crowd you are no longer a sheep, you become a lion. A great roar arises in your heart, the roar of freedom."

If there is one thing that we've all learned from the plandemic is that people are more than willing to give up their rights and freedoms. And sex is the last thing that I believe anyone can take from us. We have sex in private, no one talks about it, and everyone's doing it in one fashion or another.

Because of recent events, people aren't talking about politics to others, and in many places, people can't even attend church. The one thing that no one can make us do or not do is give up sex, or give up the sex that we enjoy most. Yet, people will always judge.

We. as a society, have grown accustomed to and accepting of same-sex relationships. And many people see a man who has two women as "awesome." Yet, if a woman has two husbands, or is married and has lovers, she is a slut. And it's not normally the men having sex with the married women who are complaining or judging.

You would think that a man who has a wife that other men desire would be something that other men might aspire to. And they do. Many men want a woman that other men wish they had, but they are not open to allowing other men to sexually experience the woman he is with or for the woman he is with to experience other men.

When people find out that a man's wife is having sex with another man or other men, they instantly see it as cheating. And they see the man as the lesser man. Now, some people will see the wife as a "dirty tramp" because she enjoys strange cock from time to time.

What about the wife who desires another man and gives her husband permission to be with other women? If the husband declines the offer and the wife dates or has sex with another man, who is in the right?

In the above situation, the wife offered the husband a hall pass, and he declined. The wife had already voiced a desire for the other man. So, the husband was in the know. If he did not tell her that she couldn't see the other man, then there is no foul. If the husband did tell his wife that he would not permit her to have sex with this other man, and she did so anyway, then there is an issue.

The issue is not in the fact that the wife had sex with another man when her husband told her that he would not permit her to do so. The issue is in the fact that he felt that if he didn't want to have sex with someone else that his wife couldn't, either.

Let's look at this in a non-sexual way. Would you see it odd if a husband told his wife that she couldn't have dessert because he didn't want any, or a husband telling his wife that she can't have chocolate ice cream because he doesn't care for it, or, maybe, a husband telling his wife that because he doesn't want to have two scoops of ice cream, and therefore the wife is denied the second scoop that she wants?

Let's look at this another way . . . If a husband and wife went out to dinner, would you see it odd if the husband told the wife she had to eat what he ate because he makes those decisions? This type of relationship can only last so long. And even if it does last a long time, at least one person is going to be living a very unhappy life.

Life is too short and there is too little time for us not to live life to the fullest whenever we can. If people want to be Democrats or Republicans or Libertarians, then that's okay. One is not better than another. And who can honestly say which religion is the right religion? Likewise, no one has the right to tell any consenting adults that what they enjoy sexually is wrong.

We have to live in this world together. Wouldn't it be a better place if we saw natural sexual desires for what they are . . . natural, normal sexual behaviors and desires?

Until we can accept that other people might think about, desire, and have sex differently than we do, we can never move forward. As for me, I'm not willing to take any steps back. I'm moving forward either with or without you.