Tied Up in Knotts Ch. 06

For the most part, Lenny and Tia had left me alone. I could tell they were dying to pry my life open but they bit their lip. They watched me come and go, they waved, we had small talk, and occasionally they forced me to the main house for a family style meal and television with them and the kids.

A week after moving in we were lounging on the couches watching the Safeway Open. I had an affinity for Sam Ryder and was happy to see him playing well. Lenny and Tia were on one couch. Lexi had her legs hanging over the arm of an overstuffed chair and Jay was curled up on the other end of my couch with his iPad.

"What are you doing Sunday?" Tia asked. I gave a noncommittal shrug just as Sam sank a putt. Damn, he made it look effortless.

"Then you'll come by."

Tia was confident. Her version of asking politely was letting you know exactly how things were going down. I found her assertiveness oddly comforting in a time when my life was a bit upside down. I lacked motivation to live a productive life outside of work and had no reservations about taking up space on their couch. A lazy Sunday didn't sound so bad.

I let them fill my belly with the soup that had simmered and smelled good all day before I made my way back to the cottage.

Tia gave me a kiss on the cheek as we hugged goodbye. "I'll see you Sunday." Len stood next to her patiently waiting his turn. They were affectionate. Hugging was casual as a handshake and a requirement for every arrival and departure. Adapting was easy for me, I thrived on physical touch.

"What time?" I asked.

"They'll trickle in around three but you can come whenever you'd like."

Urrrch. Back up. They'll trickle in? No. I was not ready for that. Tia and Lon were one thing but they? Nope. I was hardly keeping myself together. The last thing I wanted to do was be around the same people who I'd unfriended for not liking Lee, the man who was cheating on me like a stray dog.

Facing them meant facing my own embarrassment and I wasn't ready for that.

I was embarrassed they'd been right, embarrassed I'd been wrong, embarrassed I'd been played a fool, embarrassed I hadn't seen it coming. I wasn't ready to admit to anyone what was going on, that I was married to a complete stranger. They'd ask questions I couldn't answer, like why I hadn't kicked him out of my life like a normal person. Then they'd find out that starting Wednesday, I'd be meeting with said scheming, conniving, soon-to-be ex-husband for lunch and marriage counseling—for no other reason than to appease his guilt-filled, slutty heart.

So yeah, I didn't want to be around people who might ask questions about the wreckage of my life. I just wanted to sink to the bottom of the ocean in peace and, in a year or two, float back to the surface looking slightly worse for wear.

****

When Sunday rolled around I did the only thing I could do and hid out in the cottage. Maybe they'd forget about me. I had a bunch of work to do anyway. Weeks' worth of videos that needed to be edited and uploaded to the local Yevo social media.

I was slipping, I could feel it. I was less engaged when I was around the kids, I relied on volunteer leaders more than normal, and I found myself wanting to skip out on school events. I even found myself putting my phone on do not disturb so I wouldn't be bothered by anyone. That wasn't like me. I loved my job.

If I dragged myself to the main house I'd have to deal with more than just my personal life, I'd have to deal with the Knotts.

I hadn't responded to any of their messages—and there were many. Especially Penn, who had reached out to me every day since I left Lee. They had made their feelings of Lee known and I had defended the damn prick. Hell, I ended our friendship over him. Just add them to the list of things I wasn't properly dealing with.

As a failsafe from whatever the day would bring, I locked the cottage doors and got to work. It was tedious working trimming videos and timing music. It took an incredible amount of patience and focus and it just so happens I had those in spades. Didn't hurt that it required so much focus that I didn't have time to think of Lee.

"Cushman, you damn sonofabitch," Ryan yelled. He and Penn stormed into the small bedroom, scaring the shit out of me.

"What the hell—" I scrambled. Penn rescued my laptop from hitting the floor just as Ryan immobilized me in some sort of voodoo lock hold.

"What the hell," Penn mocked. Unlike his brother, Penn didn't look amused as he brandished a handful of zip ties and quickly locked my hands behind my back then repeated the action to my feet. "I've been trying to reach you for a month. I've called, texted, I even left notes on your car. I don't know what's going on but you straight up avoiding me ends here."

When he'd finished his handy work, he picked me up and huffed me over his shoulder like a sack of flour. I had to hand it to the guy, he was one strong man.

"I'm sorry!" I laughed. What else could I do? The kidnapping had undoubtedly become their signature move and they'd thrown me for a loop.

"Little too late my friend."

"This is abuse," I groaned. The position was mildly uncomfortable and, with my arms secured behind my back, I didn't have any leverage to move. "And you wonder why I haven't answered your calls?" I mumbled.

He laughed under his breath, it was quiet but I heard it and smiled. Penn made his way out of the cottage and to the house. I couldn't see anything except his ass but I could hear the chatter as we entered the kitchen through the garage. It sounded like the usual suspects. I tried to maneuver so I could see what was going on but no dice.

"Glad you could make it," Logan said with a smug twang.

"Well, you know, I had some free time and decided to wander this way—voluntarily, of course," I quipped, limp and hogtied on Penn's shoulder.

"Of course, of course," he laughed. "You always were eager to hang with us. Funny we had to come get you. I guess there's a first for everything."

Even I had to laugh at that given their history of taking me against my will and all. Penn flung me off his shoulder while simultaneously setting me on my feet with care. The blood rushed from my head and I struggled to find my balance. Once I was steady, Penn let go of my shoulders.

"Sit," Ryan gestured to an empty chair. "Eat."

Everyone was mingling around the table, munching on enough food to feed an army. I wiggled my hands to remind everyone that they were still tied. No one seemed bothered by it. I looked at Penn, hoping he'd have mercy . He smiled, it was big and genuine and, despite the shit month I had, it made me happy.

He walked over. Just when I thought that the big beautiful smile meant he was going to untie me; he began to fill his plate with food.

"Seriously?" I looked around to the others, "No one's going to untie me?" Other than a few taunting smirks, I was grossly ignored. I found myself wanting to be annoyed. They kidnapped me, tied me up, and were forcing me to socialize during a time of great emotional turmoil. I should've been upset. I wanted to be upset.

I was surprisingly not upset.

"Oh, hey—" Ryan said in a sudden rush of remembrance. "We have something to celebrate."

"Yessss" Jane smiled. "A proper celebration is in order."

Jane and Ryan looked at one another then rushed to the kitchen. I was confused. I thought, maybe they knew about Lee? They never liked him so it made sense they'd want to celebrate our separation. But how did they know? No one knew the details except Wayne. Not even my parents. I had no desire to talk about it in front of everyone and, as far as I was concerned, there was nothing to celebrate. What? Being a fool? Cheated on? Beaten down? Tricked into hanging on to a stupid string of hope? No thank you.

But they weren't stupid, they had to know what was going on. I was staying in the cottage by myself. It wasn't hard to piece together if you tried. Ryan and Jane came back with a tray of champagne glasses full of bubbly and passed them around.

"Here's to Nash," Ryan lifted his glass. "Lincoln's well-deserved Man of the year. He's humble, selfless, and wicked fun to be around."

"Nash!"

I was flooded with relief. If I had to choose between being praised, which I hated, or explaining to the room how Lee had cheated on me with Paul...well, I was more than happy to lift my glass.

"It's not that big of a deal."

Penn gave me a stern look. "It is a big deal,"

"Okay," I raised my glass in defeat. "To me."

They ignored my self-deprecating sarcasm and raised their glasses once more. It's hard to say it without sounding like a total humble brag but I had been congratulated hundreds of times since being nominated and then winning. I would never assume the compliments weren't real but the difference between the people in the room with me now and everyone else, was the level of sincerity. It was the first time in a while that I felt deserving.

I sipped my glass and smiled. Ryan had his arm slung around Jane, who was laughing with Logan and Abby while Ryan talked to Len. I glanced at Penn, he sat at the table watching me. There was something in that intense and paralyzing gaze of his. Contentedness, maybe. Like everything in the world was exactly as it should be. Oh, how jealous I was. While he sat with his friends and family; laughing and living carefree, my world was the definition of shambles.

In a private moment between him and me; he lifted his glass in celebration. We were the friendship version of the Prodigal Son. I had taken my riches and left him only to lose it all and return with nothing. And yet, here he was accepting me back with arms open.

I did my best to stop worrying about Lee and enjoyed being around people who cared. That was what my wounded soul needed. Genuine relationships.

They finally untied me when I told them I needed to use the restroom but not before making a big stink about it. Penn made everyone guard an exit in case I tried to escape. I couldn't help myself, I laughed. Between everyone guarding the doors like I might charge them and Penn following behind me like the diligent Warden he was, it was impossible not to.

They were the strangest group of people I'd ever met and I loved them even more for it.

On my way back to the kitchen I made a quick motion toward the door where Ryan was standing guard. He flinched and gripped the door jam to try and stop me. I just stood there and laughed.

"Not funny!" Ryan growled. "Penn would have my balls if you left."

I raised a brow at Penn, who was leaning against the kitchen island with his arms across his chest. He shrugged, I smiled, he smiled, I laughed, he smiled bigger. Penn was killing the friend game. I squeezed his shoulder as I passed and whispered thank you.

"Okay," Len announced, getting everyone's attention. "Nash is Game Master tonight. Should be good since he does this kind of thing for a living." There were several whoops as everyone made their way to the living room

"I'm not at work," I whined. "Don't I deserve a break?"

"Nope. It's your contribution. Life is a give-and-take, Nash. We all contribute. For example, we never say no when you need to borrow the box truck for work and if you ever need help with building, remodeling, septic, or pretty much anything else, one of them," he gestured at the Knotts, "will be there to lend a hand. By trade, you know how to emcee game night. From here on out, you'll be the Game Master, unless you can find some other way to contribute," he explained.

I glanced at Penn and he shrugged like well, he ain't lying and remember who helped you with your clubble trouble?

Len's argument was not only right but airtight. It explained so much about the core value of their community and how they worked together for the greater good. Not wanting to fall out of their grace, I threw my hands in the air and yelled for the games to begin.

Coming up with something spur-of-the-moment was hard but I managed. No one cared that the game was aimed toward kids half their age as I doled out the instructions for Birdy on a Perch.

The evening was entertaining to say the least. I hadn't laughed that hard in ages. Watching a group of adults scramble around the living room before flying into their partner's arms or on their back depending on the instructions had me in stitches.

At one-point Abby tried to hold Logan on her back but ended up screaming as she slowly fell backward. Logan was laughing so hard he couldn't do anything about it. Penn learned just how competitive I was. When the music stopped, I'd do anything to get to Penn as quickly as possible. At one point I jumped over Ryan's shoulders just so we wouldn't get taken out of the game.

He clearly didn't share my level of competitiveness which is why I glared at him when we got second place. In return, he laughed.

I hugged everyone goodbye and waited for Penn to do the same. He had parked by the cottage so we walked across the yard together.

"Are you done ignoring me?"

"Do I have a choice?" I joked.

"Yes." Penn sighed and I could tell my attempt at downplaying the situation hadn't worked. "Look Nash, we shouldn't have excluded Lee, I get it. It's a mistake that won't be made again. I value your friendship more than anything else. So much that I'm willing to fight to get it back. We only hang out when Lee's available? Done. Whatever you want. Just stop ignoring me, please."

Penn was never that bold and upfront. When I first kind-of-met him in high school, and then occasionally throughout the years, he was always quiet and reserved. So much so, I thought he didn't like me. But there we were, Penn was calling me out, putting my shortcomings into the light off day.

"I should have dealt with things differently. I told myself that you guys didn't really care about friendship. Clearly, I was wrong."

"Very wrong." He looked at me and gave me a sly smile that made me feel warm inside. Ugh, I was so deprived of affection.

"What if we have lunch tomorrow, my treat?" I offered. It was the least I could do to repay him for his kindness. Hanging out with him was an added bonus. "We can even go to that sketchy Thai place you love so much."

"It's not sketchy, it's authentic," he chided.

"Whatever you say," I raised my hands. "It's actually perfect. I need to acclimate myself to the food before my trip, anyway."

Penn furrowed his brows, "What trip?"

"Thailand, Cambodia, and Vietnam," I said, excitedly. I had booked my flights right after talking to Lee. Figured I might as well get it paid for before he changed his mind or decided to make things difficult for me. That's how much I trusted Lee.

"Lee doesn't seem like the 'explore Asia' type, but I'm sure you guys will have fun."

Penn was fishing. He knew I wasn't living at home but wouldn't come straight out and ask me about it.

"It's just me and, yes, I'm going to have the time of my life. I plan on eating all the questionable food I can find and haggling with shadiest people bold enough to approach me."

"You're going alone huh? Why isn't Lee going?"

Line casted. Shame there were no fish to bite.

"What time do you want to meet for lunch tomorrow?" I asked, changing the subject.

The porch light from the cottage casted light behind Penn, making it difficult to see his face. Difficult, but not impossible. He was watching me, trying to figure me out. He wanted to push, I could tell, but he didn't.

"How about I pick you up around noon?"

"I'll be ready."

****

"I'm surprised you're still in town. I thought you had that big contract job with an oil rig?" I asked as we ate lunch.

"I did." Penn took a bite of Pho and sucked the noodles down. "But there are more important things happening here. The job has always been an escape; my excuse to run away. I've done it for so long that it's all I know. I decided it was time to change my investments."

"Aren't most investments online? Can't you change them remotely?"

"Not those kinds of investments," he smirked. His dark eyes twinkled as he watched me. "Quality of life investments."

"Sounds like I've been making the wrong investments," I murmured. Penn looked at me questioningly but I pushed forward. "What kind of changes are you making?"

"Hmm, mostly where I'm spending my time and who I'm spending it with."

"Smart. Spending your time with the wrong people can really screw shit up." Before Penn could question me, I continued. "How long will you be in town for?"

"As long as I need to be."

"Have you taken that death trap out lately?"

"Almost every week." I shuttered and Penn laughed. "It's not that terrible. I kept you safe the entire time."

"I don't know about that," I scoffed. "I sure didn't feel safe."

"That was a gentle stroll we went on. Nothing was ever gonna happen to you."

"Now you're just being rude," I laughed. "Don't do that. Don't pretend like you didn't try and make me shat my pants." Penn looked at me with big innocent eyes and took a giant bite of food so he didn't have to lie to my face. I glared and shook my head. "I knew it. I knew you did it on purpose! And you wonder why I thought you hated me."

"I don't hate you," he said.

"Mm-hmm, suuuure."

Penn shook his head at me, making me laugh.

Lunch was exactly what I needed. I felt better than I had in a month.

***

Penn came over after work. He was just going to stay for a few minutes but then we were having dinner and time kind of slipped away.

"Where's Cam?" I asked. She wasn't at Len and Tia's on Sunday and he hadn't mentioned her since.

Penn thought about it for a second and shrugged. "I think she's having dinner with friends? I'm not entirely sure. Why?"

"I was surprised I haven't seen her. I figured she would've been at Lon and Tia's on Sunday."

"She works in Salem and spends most of her time there. She doesn't really like driving back and forth."

"Even when you're in town?"

"She comes around for a bit when I first get back, but she has a job and a life of her own. She drives over every so often and usually makes it to the kids sports stuff they're playing close to Salem."

He was so casual about it, like it wasn't strange that he and his wife had separate lives. I figured him and Cam didn't have a solid relationship, how do you when you spend so much time apart? But then I thought of Lee, who managed to do some serious damage with relatively limited free time. What would've happened if we had lived an hour apart? Good God. I shivered at the thought. Who was I to judge? Whatever their terms, they were clearly doing better than Lee and I. I decided to leave my judgment at the door. I had no podium to stand on. Lee had burned it to the ground. All I had left from my high horse was a mouth full of humble pie to keep me quiet.

It was late when Penn left and I was sad to see him go. I was so damn lonely and starved for companionship.

Lunch the next day turned into another dinner. The next few weeks were full of meals spent together. A combination of breakfast, lunch, and/or dinner. Sometimes all three. We even spent the weekends together. We were always doing something; hiking, shopping, or helping Penn with work. We even went running together. We found a balance. Some days it focused on me and other days on Penn. It truly felt equally yoked.

Between work, Penn, and his family, I hardly had a moment to myself. I went from spending most of my time sad and alone to being fully submerged in community. I wondered if you could drown from too much oxygen, it felt like I might. But man did I need that rush of affection to balance the part of my life that had become toxic and dead.

And speaking of Lee, he was really messing with my life. The fallout of Lee and Paul had rolled over to work. Where Paul and I might have had a rocky relationship before, we remained civil enough to get things done. That had changed. Now neither of us could be in the same room as the other. I had my reasons and he had his.