All Comments on 'Timing is Everything'

Fell asleep on page one.

A nicely written little story. I was surprised that Sharon moved quite so quickly after Ray started on his tour and I wasn't 100% sure about switch from her pre-marriage morality to her abandonment of that as soon as Ray went. Equally, she knew what fans were like and she had already decided that he was going to cheat on her so she was already mentally prepared to move quickly. Shifting from a (as he was then) minor musician to a sleazy card dealer didn't seem a great move either! Despite that, I like it. It is very well-paced and the story feels believable, very natural. The way that the timing was everything added to the pathos. Thank you for posting it.

Talk about projection

Loved the story, but I it seemed stilted in its telling. Overall concept was very, very good though.

Sharon’s character made little sense, she was more of a plot point than anything else. She clung to her virginity as a matter of her ethics, and then suddenly threw away her married relationship to fuck around out of some untold, yet overwhelming, fear of loss? The shift to her portrayal was without predicate, revealing the strings of a writer manipulating a character, not from an understanding of the character written, but as a marionette to complete the machinations of the tale the author chose to tell.

Sharon’s character made little sense, she was more of a plot point than anything else. She clung to her virginity as a matter of her ethics, and then suddenly threw away her married relationship to fuck around out of some untold, yet overwhelming, fear of loss? The shift to her portrayal was without predicate, revealing the strings of a writer manipulating a character, not from an understanding of the character written, but as a marionette to complete the machinations of the tale the author chose to tell.

Well thought story. Your use of a rarely used concept was well crafted.

We thank you

Nice tight and well written...

5 stars

It's actually a pretty decent story and could be somewhat factual knowing about the music industry in the 60's and 70's. Most of the negative comments are probably based on the limited sexual content (it's there - it's just not graphic) or the fact that the woman cheated. Read the story for it's value but you have to think Elvis or Country and not rock & roll. It will help it make more sense.

Worthless slut. She kept saying there would be cheating if he left meaning him when all the time she knew it would be her.

Pretty good story, with some minor errors (e.g., one casts a die, not a dye). I can’t put a finger on why (sorry), but the story didn’t generate much emotion for me. I didn’t find myself caring about any of the main characters.

Good story but get lost in the narrative style. 3 * for the effort.

I often say “much of life is timing.” Sharon allowed her insecurities and lack of faith in her husband to push her into an affair. It was like a self-fulfilling prophecy. She now dreams she could have had it all if she waited one more day, but her transgressions would have come out and he would have dumped her anyway. Of course she might have gotten more if his money, but she still would have lost him.

Pretty well written, thanks for sharing.

Totally weird -- in a good way. Certainly doesn't lack originality and that is what I prize most. 5* from me.

This story didn't really flow and end was flat. Sharon was burned through her own stupidity but that wasn't represented anywhere. The rating is superficially high because of miserable men who want to see all women burned. At best this is a 3.

I felt the story was a little bit rushed, especially toward the end. There were some legal "misses" but overall story arc was good. 4*

Good story!

"She missed sharing his fantastic life by one fucking day!"

No, Sharon missed out when she abandoned her marriage and started living with and fucking another man. She definitely traded down instead of up. She reminds me of my best friends ex-wife. The wife was always seriously jealous of any women her husband ever interacted with as he was a very good looking guy with a great personality. My friend was a real straight arrow and never ever cheated on his wife but he found out she was cheating on him with multiple men.

“If she had just waited one more day…”

… she’d still have been a scheming bitch

not a feel good story. 3* for effort

1. The part about changing Sharon's surname is totally unnecessary and any attorney would have told him it was idiotic to try. He was being advised to accept the divorce documents as they were before she changed or withdrew them. Not only does he have no standing to request she change her name (at least in Canada but I suspect everywhere else as well) but it means there is an undecided issue, the divorce doesn't go through uncontested and she still has a chance to withdraw or amend her divorce documents to change the overly fair settlement she'd originally set out.

2. It seems Sharon is another LW example of the formerly good high character wife hit with the Martian slut-ray, going from someone who wouldn't have intercourse before marriage and wouldn't go with a musician unless there was a chance of a serious relationship to being a married woman doing two other men including arranging to have sex with one of them in a fraudulent attempt to get her husband back.

I still believe characters should be sufficiently consistent to be believable, which in my view Sharon was not.

I like it. Clever serving debacle. I like that the burn was husband living a good life and nothing else.

I don't agree with her missing it by one day. He would have found out she cheated and she would be divorced anyway. More wealthy because f the timing, but divorced.

Groannnnn

Great karma story where the cheating spouse learned a lesson and the victim was able to move on with life.

Interesting story.

Unusual and well explained.

Except old friends.

What happened to them?

4 out of 5 from me.

Timing may be critical, but she missed fantastic life by being a round-heeled bitch.

A well executed and unflattering portrait of a selfish girl. Every choice Sharon made was to suit her own projected needs without consideration for Ray’s. I enjoy your writing. Thanks much.

Well, she got what she deserved. He dodged a bullet by the timing working out the way it did.

Thought the writing was good; hated the plot line. It made little to no sense to me.

The author spent the first third of the story building up two characters and showing how unusual and true they both were. He proved to be faithful to a fault always avoiding any emotionless relationship. Further, the author carefully introduced his first (soon to be) wife and made it clear she was his most knowledgeable fan of his in the whole world...and then, somehow, suddenly completely flips when he is going to Nashville...a dream they BOTH always dreamed of, and both felt he would earn. This plot drama the author suddenly introduced about her worrying that he would suddenly change and become a skirt chases makes absolutely no sense. This was a dream of both of theirs.

Yes, it was interesting to see the author play the game with the divorces, etc...but it fails at its most basic level. Neither character would have done what the author presented. It just isn't believable. I hated it. I scored it a 3 only because of the interesting games regarding the divorce the author came up with.

Cheating hypocrite got what she deserved. Failure, pain and never ending loneliness and regret.

Scores 4/5

She changed her stripes right in the middle of the story. D

Reads like a great "Country Song."

Ooops, but she did tell him their marriage would be over if he went on the road.

A very well written tale with a very interesting premise. She sure screwed herself with her doubts and lack of trust. Good fir Ray fir standing by his morals in a business where that rarely happens.

All I can say is thank God few women are actually as evil, witless and slutty as you men here think they are.

Decent enough story, it garners an extra star just because we've had the same 5 cuck writers using a boatload of names to post under this week.

should have kept her legs closed

This stories twisted conclusion to give empathy to a woeful victimized Sharon was grossly misplaced. Ray earned his rewards and did not deserve Sharon's CHEATING BETRAYAL.

\

Sharon jumped to a conclusion that happen to her mother but with absolutely no evidence Ray was of the same mold. Sharon made herself a CHEAT - she let the Martian-slut-ray hit her for greed.

\

3***, hooyah, it was a 5* but dropped for portray Sharon as victimized

She didn't miss by one day, she was overly committed by then,

Unbelievably badly written

Lucky guy ,nice story line. Another stupid women story!

"Smart" girl.

Bad timing!

4

She was lazy. She didn't even try to talk to her husband, or give the tour separation a try. What a fool. He was lucky!

Great plot, great storytelling, albeit a little on a lemonade side but then again, nobody on LE will ever write "War and Peace".

An interesting plot idea, plausibly executed. But I suspect the card dealer would have alerted Ray to her whoring after she dropped him and went back to Ray; why not, as pissed as he was at being used? So even if she never filed or withdrew the divorce action her goose was cooked when she shacked up with the card dealer. And I wonder why she didn't go back to the card dealer, at least to be his piece of ass and learn to deal cards in Vegas? She was attractive, had no morals or ethics, and loved to fuck, so she would not have been without a man, or some other sucker, for long. Her living a lonely life of regret is not believable. But everything else was. Thanks for the effort.

Convoluted and not very believable. Still you story, your words, as strange an idea of women and their thought process. Must be a USA men thing?

Good story. The ending was rushed and not interesting.

Stupid hag.

The first above-averge she saw after Ray left for the concert, she hooked up immediately.

Regret always comes last.

She should have married anyone, anything so she won't be alone.

She didn't even have cats -- what a lonely life indeed.

What happened to his buddies?????

What a moron. Didn't she know she could actually go on tour with him? Cheaters are always projecting.. they think just because they aren't worth a damn, they think everyone else is doing it too. She had no trust in him. He really should've seen that as a red flag. Unless he's given her reasons not to trust him, she had no business not trusting him.. and look, turns out she was the cheater.. just like her traveling salesman cheating asshole dad. It irked me the way she did it too. She cheated and moved out of their apartment ---- but the minute she found out he's now a star suddenly, him allegedly cheating doesn't seem so bad huh? She's definitely a gold digger. Her games afterwards equally irked me.. she could've just explained to him she was scared he is going to cheat so she wants a divorce.. there was no need to mind fuck him to believing he's the one that sent her divorce papers. But honestly, after she cheated that relationship was done done done. I would've liked for her to tell him why the games? I guarantee had he in fact fell for her bullshit she NEVER would've told him about cheating.. she would've continued to allow him to think he sent her divorce papers, she also would've been fucking other men while he's on the road. Shes clearly had gotten used to cheating in that short time.. First the guy she moved in with, and now the lawyer? She was a virgin when they met and suddenly now she's a cheating whore sleeping with 2 different men. Was she cheating from the moment he left for the road? Where did she meet bill or phill ?(whatever his name is). She had to have BEEN cheating on her husband to be able to move in with Bill so suddenly. Nobidy just moves in with someone they met a dew days ago.. no, that relationship was been going on. She went from fearing he's going to have affairs, to suddenly not caring if he is having affairs, now that he's made it. Suddenly those fake fears meant nothing as long as she is there with him soaking up the attention and abundant wealth his music is sure to bring.. a typical gold digging slut snake..

If the word if weren't, then life would be different! Good work!

Well she is definitely a selfish person, vile and disgusting

@mattenw

If the word if weren't, then life would be different! Good work!

WHAT? Doesn't make any sense.

she loves her life plan more than the men involved in it lol. u had a missing word in ur very first line in the story. do some proof reading

hmm seems neither one of them was ready for marriage but the few are. the fact that he didnt talk to his spouse about going on tour. just said yes both times without even thinking about it, weak sauce. so we have a gold digger and the immature rock star. now all u need is an editor lol

"What a moron. Didn't she know she could actually go on tour with him? Cheaters are always projecting.. they think just because they aren't worth a damn, they think everyone else is doing it too. She had no trust in him. He really should've seen that as a red flag."

to be fair during that time ppl going on tour the odds of him doing a groupie are extremely high. tbh probably 80% of males during that time were cheating lol so basically this is an exception, during this time period its was more likely for the husband to cheat on the road than the female. werent very many options for females most were too damn scared to cheat

This was fairly well written overall, but there were some time-line issues. For example, by the time answering machines became available in the 70's the Ed Sullivan Show was off the air. Pretty good effort though. Please keep trying.

I like a good btb but this was just "adequate". The story was choppy and nothing led to show she was a gold-digging wife. For her to make that quick of a change into a slut didn't seem real- even for fiction

Biggest clearing error: no answering machines in the 1950’s. Otherwise, not bad.

IF, a short word with a long meaning.

Good story with a rushed ending.

The moral of the story (I think) is that you gotta have faith in the one you love. Five stars for a well written story. I don't care about the answering machine faux pas.

Not a bad tale. I did want to mention that about the closing line of one single day, she had already sexually cheated and had emotionally cheated for a while by that time. That means she was already a slut and cheater, so their marriage was likely already doomed.

"This offer ends when we hang up the phone. I think that there may be a place for you in my Stable of Stars, but it's far from a done deal. If you are interested say so, if not, it was nice talking to you."

"I'll do it, sir, and thank you for giving me the chance."

Ray said, "I'm saying that we will talk about it and decide together."

really, that would have ended my marriage. sounds like a 1-sided marriage from that point on. not an excuse to cheat but if i had been her i would have moved on as i am now. but during that time it wasnt easy for women. idk i would have been honest but might have stay married for the security and see what he does with said honesty

We need to talk about this. We've hit the big time. were was this WE when he made life altering decisions. lol thats the problem with these old back in the day stories. the answering machine thing the story started in the 50s when he was a teen in school doesnt have any kind of time line in there but i would think by the time he was married was probably the 60s by then but have know idea the the answering machine was invented and used

There’s one thing missing: Sharon should have been pregnant by Bruce or shyster, with timing leaving no doubt that it wasn’t Ray’s.

The ending shows that she is in denial about her own nature. The timing doesn't matter. She would have cheated eventually unless she drastically changed her weak character. The opposite of love isn't hate, it's fear. She was a fearful person, and didn't fully love him.

ZK

She ended her marriage when she screwed the other guy. She was worried about his screwing around and he was not even on tour before she started. He was very lucky to get away from her.

And she would still be keeping secrets and sleeping around. Decision was not hers after her first time stepping out. Voided the contract. Done deal, regardless of timing.

Running had nothing to do with it. Jealousy, lack of trust, greed... Yeah. But not timing. She didn't bother giving him a chance. She ended the marriage when he left for his trip.

That said, this is a glaring error: 'tears in his eyes, Ray signed the acceptance document that the lawyers had prepared. It only asked for one change. It insisted that she must revert to her maiden name. She would once again be Sharon Brown instead of Sharon Reynolds.'. You don't get to sign with changed. If they wanted to be sure to ger her deal, you sign as is. Otherwise she has to sign the changes and she likely would take that opportunity to recind the offer....

Great the conniver didn't get him in the end.

She was quite the piece of work who got about what she put in.

I stopped reading when Elvis was mentioned. Now there is a worthless excuse of a human