To Have a Sweetheart - David Ch. 02

On the other side of her was Luke who was busy with a book, my latest reading. He had trouble reading it without his glasses. Noticing I was awake he closed it and said smiling "Your sleeping habits are a mystery to me."

"And you are a lovely cuddle Mr.Serene." I murmured crawling over Jemma, gave him a little kiss and snuggled my head in his lap. "Can I ask you something?" I asked after a moment in thought over the stunning man in my arms.

"You know you don't have to ask me to ask something?" he said with a little head rub.

"Okay-okay, uhm... well you are a very handsome man..."

"Not really a question David." he smiled down at me. Oh, he looked beautiful.

"No, uhm... haven't you... hadn't you really had anyone besides your ex-wife?"

"Oh, that one. Uhm, well... I guess my mother set quite an example with never moving on from my father." he admitted sheepishly.

"But even before?"

"No, I mean there were a few kisses here and there, but it didn't feel too right, I guess the reason is a little obvious now." he said as he played with my hair.

"Is it?" I asked and regretted my choice of words immediately, "No, uhm, I mean... sorry, that came out wrong."

"You're alright, I guess we haven't really talked about that. I guess I still have some interest in women, but not really - if that makes any sense."

"I guess - you were married to one. I don't think I could even fake it, not that I'm saying you were... I mean..."

"No, I get what you mean. I think the best way to put it is to say that I had romantic interest, but not sexual interest, like sex was basically the last thing on my mind, I just thought I wasn't much of a sexual person at the time."

"Huh..."

"How about you shoo the audience and I'll show how I feel now?" he murmured bringing my attention to the arousal under my arm, tugging me up to him.

I snickered a little laugh and tickled Jemmas back foot - a sure gesture to get rid of her.

I climbed up to Lukes lips, him pulling me closer from my neck and saddled his hips. He grabbed hold of both of us and stroked us as we made out. I let my hands roam his broad chest, unable to resist giving his nipples a little pinch, earning a howling yelp from him.

We both chuckled a little laugh over his reaction and resumed our battle of the tongues as we humped lightly against his work on us. Like me, he was a quick finisher in the morning and soon we both erupted on his chest.

After having a joined shower we chatted a little of the big and small, helped ourselves to some breakfast and decided to meet before my work the next few days when I didn't have rehearsals as I finished a little late for his liking.

...

The next few days we met for every breakfast and slowly turned more public with our relationship. Greetings turned into hugs, goodbyes into brief kisses and walked holding hands.

He invited me to his place one night after work. We sat on the couch and I cuddled into his arms. God, he felt so homey. We talked a little, he said how he has a fair few interviews lined up and how plants intrigued him almost as much as cat behaviour and that he's considering getting one. I talked of my work days and how I was beyond growing bored.

I climbed up on him, stealing a kiss. I hadn't properly touched him for days, his closeness suddenly made my body tingle. I turned my little soft kiss into passionate making out in an instant, tugging my hands under his shirt and pulling it off.

"Sixty-nine me." I whispered on his lips, pulling my own shirt off.

We kissed our way to his bed, undoing our pants along the way, swiftly stepping out of them before laying down on our sides and making out with our dicks.

God, I loved a good sixty-nine, it was like having your two favourite activities together in one.

We sucked and moaned in unison, savouring each others work on each other. I gently prodded his hole, asking for permission and felt him nod on my dick.

I wet my fingers and he did the same, both of us adding fingers to our play. He found my sweet spot with ease and massaged it gently, making my bliss build fast and I was determined to make him catch up with me.

We were both rocking our hips against each other, eagerly lashing our tongues around our dicks, doing our best to pleasure the other and build our own.

I was so focused with my own boiling pleasure that I was surprised with cum suddenly flooding my mouth, the taste of him in my mouth triggering my own release. I lapped up his juices and felt him struggle a little doing the same.

"Sorry, I should have warned you." I apologised immediately as I pulled off, panting for air.

"That actually was quite erotic." he softly replied.

We laid there for a few minutes, bathing in our post sex glow. He offered a quick clean up before we snoozed off and we climbed up, him leading the way to the bathroom.

His back looked much better already, the scabs having almost completely faded away, mostly welts covering him, even some of the welts were starting to fade.

"Think that'd fit two?" I asked, gesturing at his soaking tub.

"Two me's - no, two you's - yes, me and you? I guess I'd have to try and be as tiny as you." He answered jokingly.

I smacked his arm playfully and responded with a little pout.

"What? I like your size, suits you well." He said apologetically and kissed my forehead.

"Fine, you're forgiven, but it's still a sensitive topic." I pouted.

"Okay, but really, I find you quite sexy." he said looking me over with a appreciating look.

"You should see yourself, I don't think I could ever take you to a gay club, they'd be all over you like you'd stepped into an ants nest."

"Sure about that? I'd be more worried about you, no one could possibly resist that sweet smile of yours." he murmured and gave me a little kiss.

We made our way back to bed, him declaring that it's his turn as he snuggled up to my collarbone draping his leg over me.

Could not wait until that turned into an everynight occurrence.

...

I woke up to struggling, Luke tossing next to me, talking through his sleep. Mumbling something about not hurting someone, constantly chanting 'no'.

"Luke!" I started off with, "Luke, hon, wake up, you're home." I said and reached to caress his cheek.

With a deep gasp of breath he woke up like he'd been shocked back from the dead, limbs flexed out in all directions and his head thrown back before collapsing back on the bed panting.

"Luke? You alright?" I whispered softly as I caressed his cheek.

He grabbed my hand mid-move, him seemingly still not registering his current environment.

After a few more gasped breaths he started shifting, his look moving around and staying with his hand that was gripping my wrist. "Sorry," he muttered releasing my hand, "just a bad memory."

For the first time it dawned to me that I had no idea on how to handle his past, having paid no thought to the fact that he very possibly had some form of PTSD. Even as I'd been in a similarish position, sort of, I had no idea what was the real 'right' thing to do.

I couldn't tell the expression on his face due to the darkness, just the hue from his digital clock lighting the room. I reached out again and caressed his shoulderline, softly asking "Do you want to talk about it?"

"No." he answered sharply, sounding fairly distressed. His blunt answer threw me aback, but it wasn't a moment to get offended.

I just laid next to him, our arms in contact, my further hand resting on his shoulder, listening to his breaths slowly normalise. After a bit he turned into me and nuzzled his forehead into the nook of my neck, his slightly sniffled breaths brushing against my collarbones, and wrapped his hands tightly around me.

I met his embrace softly and let him find comfort on his own accord, I had no better idea what to do. I remembered how I'd hated when anyone said anything remotely close to "everything's okay", "you're okay" or "it'll be alright" and couldn't think of a thing I'd wanted to hear, so I kept quiet.

We stayed like that for minutes, until he abruptly pulled away and said "I need a run. Go back to sleep." with an uneasy demanding voice as he sat up.

"It's three thirty Luke." I said questioningly, who the hell exercises at three in the night?

"I need a run." he said again and fumbled around to find his training gear in the dark.

"Okay." I said deciding to go with whatever he thought he needed - it was a run, not a bottle of bourbon as it was in my case anyway, so why the fuck not?

Yet I turned in bed uneasily, the entire situation was odd. Push me away, then almost desperately cling onto me and then just jump up and say you're going for a run? Something seemed off about all of it, but three thirty in the night wasn't really a time to wonder over life problems, so I decided to pay some thought on the question the next day when my brain actually functioned.

Pulling the duvet tightly to my chest, I snoozed back off soon enough. I registered him get back some time through my sleep, replace the balled up duvet between my hands with his hot showered body and snuggle up to me closely.

...

I woke in the morning alone again. I actually smelled... burning? I quickly raised up to see what's going on, just to see Luke in the kitchen and hearing muffled annoyed groans from him.

I fumbled out of bed, groggy as always, and made my way to him, embracing him from behind, trying to figure out what the hell he was doing.

"Luke, hon, what are you doing?" I asked sleepily as the kitchen really looked like it could have been anything.

"Sorry to wake you, I wanted to make you breakfast." he said, sounding a little sad.

"I'm sorry to say this, but I don't think you're doing it right." I said trying to make a joke, but it seemed to have the opposite effect as his body slouched defeatedly in my embrace and quickly tried to amend it by saying "But I have always wanted to cook with you, so what were you up to here?"

"Pancakes." he noted sadly.

Oh, the kitchen looked like anything but pancakes, maybe a cake? A custard? But his efforts were heart warming and I did my best to shake off my grogginess. I quickly tried to make sense of what was supposed to be what and fix his mistakes without making him feel too bad.

Tasting the batter I had to note that he'd used whole-grain flour to make a very thin batter, big no-no unless you know what you're doing, and explained what to look for in a pancake batter.

The next problem was the pan being way too hot and well, the pan being non-non-stick, meaning double the oil was needed. Plus he'd attempted to cook the cakes with toppings - like omlet style. Cute. And definitely impossible with a thin batter.

I did my very best sounding as encouraging as I could and started myself some very strong black tea - I really needed to buy him some coffee. I cuddled and snuggled him as I watched him amend his mistakes one by one, slowly starting to sound less sad.

Soon the first bit of improved batter hit the pan and I explained what he'd have to look for before flipping it. A few minutes later the first successful pancake was off the pan. He at least didn't look too upbeat anymore after that.

I pulled him in for a kiss and settled down with my tea that wasn't merely as strong to help me figure the situation in my hands. Sure it was very sweet of him to (try) cook me breakfast, but it didn't look like he was doing it to be sweet. Plus his almost bipolar behaviour last night, something was very off about everything.

Luckily he hadn't overkilled it with the batter like most people who dreamed of making a gigantic tower of pancakes for whatever reasons and he finished cooking them even before my brain started to accept the beginning of a new day - probably since I'd lost my hour of just rolling around in bed. Nor had figured out what was going on.

"Sorry about last night." he said, placing the cakes on the kitchen island joined by the toppings.

"For what?" I asked puzzled, being not able to grasp almost anything.

"Keeping you awake like that before a work day." he said meekly. Did he just fucking say that? That was what this was about?

"Luke, really, it's not something to be sorry about. Plus being there for you is definitely worth losing a little sleep." I said with the most genuine smile I could - well, I did love being there for him.

He looked a little reassured, but still said "But still and I bet you'd be dead asleep right now."

"Okay, stop." I said grabbing his arm, "No one has ever made me breakfast for as long as I can remember and pancakes are probably the most annoying infuriating thing to make, so if that's not a reason to be happy, then I don't know what is."

"Infuriating is definitely the right word for it. At least until you came and saved me." he half laughed and smiled to me.

"Really, we're good. I'd actually be disappointed if I couldn't be there for you and don't you ever dare be sorry about that, okay?"

"Okay." he offered softly and I kissed him in a little gesture of affection.

"So, I'm off Monday, do you have any plans for the evening?" I asked as a little plan formed in my head.

"Monday? No."

"How about you come over and we'll cook my favourites, dal makhani and palak paneer."

"I have no idea what they are, but being your favorites they have to be good."

"Indian lentil and cheese dishes, have you ever been to the asian markets on the south side?"

"No, I haven't."

"How about we make it a date, browse the markets, I'll bore you to death with talking about asian groceries while you pretend you're interested and then I'll show you to the magic of indian cuisine." I offered with a wide grin and a little eyebrow wiggle making him laugh.

"Sounds good, though I can't see a way you could bore me."

He eased out of his sorrowed mood as we carried on with our breakfast, but since I had work, I had to excuse myself home soon to feed Jemma and gather my gear. I promised to see him on Monday at the latest and kissed him goodbye.

I didn't meet him for the two next days as he had errands to run in the mornings and I finished too late for his sleeping habits, though we made time for good morning calls (my morning).

He was deciding between two trucks to buy, but couldn't decide, not that I could have helped him anyhow in that question and he'd actually had luck on job interviews with two companies interested in taking him on. I on the other hand was up to the same-same, complaining about customers and work - It's not like I don't like my work, it's just something that comes with the job, constantly venting and talking about work.

I sheepishly realised that I hadn't looked into soldiers PTSD or etcetera one afternoon when Kath came for a drink at my bar and asked how we are doing. But as she was the only person there at the moment and had been Lukes odd sort of a therapist for years then we had a little chat on the question.

By her words Luke was coping well and it was rather the transitioning to fully civil life and him embracing his new found sexuality I should be worried about. Apparently running or any form of a workout was his way of handling his stress levels and I shouldn't be worried unless too long training sessions started to appear.

But she did recommend to be less independent as Luke previously had been responsible for a hundred mans well being and now he couldn't even take care of me - so to say.

Monday afternoon I met Luke in front of my building, him sporting a very new looking pick-up truck. I was a little stunned that he could buy a brand new truck, but I guess as he said, he hadn't had anything or anyone to spend money on for quite some time and as a defence forces employee he hadn't paid anything close to the full price at the hotel.

And! And how stunningly good he looked! His blonde hair in a fresh fade cut, beard trimmed and shaped. Beautiful light gray marl tee shirt that perfectly complimented his silver eyes and navy shorts that hugged his full ass so bloody well that I had troubles looking discreet.

He drove us to the markets and took great interest in, I would say, absolutely everything. Everything from spices to sweets and inbetween. We browsed the markets for hours, hours more than intended, and bought way too much of everything we didn't need, but who wouldn't want to try wari gori's or momiji manju's?

Back home Jemma was more than happy to see Luke again and rubbed herself against him for minutes as he petted her.

We had a great time cooking together, maybe a little too busy laughing and cuddling each other, but two hours later then we should have been ready, we had two saucepans of indian dishes and way too much rice ready.

We dug into our meals and Jemma snuggled up to Lukes lap as we ate - traitor. Though I'd be there if I was a cat too.

"Can I ask you about your parents?" he asked mid meal - right off the top of my favourite subjects.

"Sure, what about them?" I asked with faked content.

"You don't talk at all? Not even once a year how you're doing?"

"No, they have made it very clear that I'm not their son and they haven't even exchanged a word with my aunt after the fatal supper when she offered me a home where I could live true to my nature."

"Have you tried to reach out?"

"Five years ago the last time, but since I was still gay..."

"And when did you move in with your aunt?"

"At fourteen-fifteen."

"Can I ask how you even ended up like that with them?"

"Uh, well... they were homophobic to begin with and I really wasn't a macho boy, so they were already prejudiced about me and my ways even before I myself reached the point in life when I started looking at anyone in a sexual way. They made me know all too well what was a 'proper and acceptable' way to live and well, I didn't really fit the description, so I had to change, constantly pretend and so on or learn the hard way."

"Huh... it's just... it's a question I'd never thought about. I mean sure army has its own homophobic moments, but life is a bit different when you are surrounded by almost only men, not to mention what it's like being away in war."

"Were there even any gay guys in your... whatever it's called?"

"Company. Of the hundred something men - three that I know of. Ok, one I know of and two I'm just quite certain about. The one had a male spouse listed on his file, but kept it to himself. The other two are supposed best friends, but I'm quite certain they are a bit more."

He helped me clean up and kissed me deep as the last dish was out of his hands, his wet hands cupping my face. In a way that kiss was different, a very clear intention behind it and I was more than keen to follow that intention.

I snickered a little laugh between our kiss, amused by his straightforwardness, as he lifted me to the kitchen counter and pressed his arousal against me, his lips growing even more tentative if that was possible.

"I really had a lovely time today." he murmured, breaking the kiss and resting his forehead against mine.

"I'd do this again any time." I said, caressing his cheek and found his look, god his eyes were so bright and beautiful.

"I'd love that."

"I hope you're spending the night?"

"I was hoping you'd ask." he smiled sweetly and kissed me again, pulling me off the counter.

"Well, I'd gladly make that a standing offer." I said as he dragged me towards the bed in his embrace, his hands already sliding under my shirt, slowly pulling it up as his hands browsed my body.

"You're such a sweet, kind man." he murmured, baring my torso to him.

I joined in with stripping him, pulling his long sleeve tee off of him, saying "And you are just unbelievably beautiful, in and out."

Our lips met again as we undid our jeans, clumsily stepping out of them as we refused to break our kiss, our hands pulling the other closer any possible way.