To Lust and To Love

"You haven't answered me."

"I mean work extra hard for you since you've admitted you're not acquainted with this business. I know it would be what Ram would want me to do."

"Great. I really appreciate that. "

For the first time he held my hand. A million shock waves electrified me. I luxuriated in his contact. He held my hand for some time. I closed my eyes and enjoyed his warmth but when I looked at him he was already asleep.

I had been tired of cleaning his suite and I wanted to rest but I don't want to end this moment. I let him hold me as I watched him so close to me agonizing in my desire to hold him too.

I dozed and when I woke up we were already lying side by side. He no longer held my hand but one of his hairy foot was draped on my hips right below my cock.

I was perspiring, both from the warmth of his bed and body. I have a tremendous hard on screaming for release from my pants. Damon was snoring softly; he must have been sound asleep. I can open my fly, release my dick and masturbate but he snuggled closely throwing his arm around me.

I was thrilled. I was petrified and the supreme urge to hug him in return was begging my senses. I forgot about my need of release. Trembling I hugged his naked body ever so lightly lest I woke him. I inhaled deeply intoxicated by his smell of sweat and cologne with woody scent. It filled my senses and I was lost as I close my eyes enjoying his warm naked body.

I felt I'm ready to die. I was immensely elated and I liked that moment to last long.

His warmth was burning me with intimacy I can't define. I simply wanted to be this close to him forever though I could have liked it best if I am also naked like him. Our crotches were touching. The lust in my mind has osmosized to my groin and I nudged my hard bulge towards him. But his cock was still limp.

I wanted to open my fly so that our naked cocks touches but he changed position and faced the opposite side.

Despite the disappointment I felt for the break in that intimate embrace, I took that chance and transferred at a sofa to avoid acting on the temptation which might break my new found attachment with the man I love.

But sleep was elusive. I kept looking at his nakedness the longing to possess and touch him strong in my wakeful mind.

But soon I surrendered to forgetfulness.

I woke up with the sun rays streaming from his glass window. I hurriedly stood up and looked at his bed. He was still fast asleep lying prone on his stomach. His hot rounded firm butt and a furry ass crack was a tempting sight. There was a wild patch of hair at the small of his back. I could see a piece of his cock sporting morning wood between his slightly parted legs.

There was still so much work to do at the office, I've decided to leave but before I left I have to relieve the stored discomfort in my nuts. I kept the door of his comfort room slightly open where I can see his naked body and fantasized stroking and laving his nakedness.

I bit my lips and masturbated faster when I felt my juice building up. I trembled as the first spurt hit the blue tiles. I hugged myself in a make believe I was hugging his body and ejaculated rope after rope of sperm more than I usually do whenever I play with my cock. I felt so weak and I sat at the edge of his bath tub as I breathed heavily.

Soon, I felt relaxed and still looking at his naked body took a paper towel and wiped my slackening dick. I was tempted to write on this same paper towel "I'll be back as soon as I finished work at the House," but opted otherwise. One of my sex partner had already done this to me once, but I can't insult Damon by doing this to him. Instead, I wrote it on a clean slate and left my message on his bedside table.

I was already deep into the scheduled activities for our forthcoming fashion show when Cynthia's personal phone buzzed. She gestured I have an incoming call from outside.

"Why have you left without waking me up?" Damon's voice roared through the telephone almost deafening me.

"I'm sorry but I don't want to wake you up. Besides, we still have to thresh out some problems with our forthcoming show which is already scheduled two weeks from now."

"Damn both of you! Haven't I told you yesterday never to discuss the house's problem behind my back? You've got an unfinished project with me which you've agreed to do. Come back, damn you!"

I was confused and was speechless for a while.

"Hey, are you coming back or not?"

As usual, I've looked at Cynthia for help. But she just puckered her lips and nodded.

"I'm coming back, if that's what you want."

"Shit. I won't waste my time calling you up if I wanted otherwise. And hurry, I don't want to stood waiting for you the whole day."

I hadn't experienced this treatment with anyone before and it smarted my ego. I wanted to just walk out of this house and Damon and be gone from his life forever. But the dictates of my heart was stronger. And I surrendered to it.

I was still smarting when I knocked at Damon's suit.

"Ah there you are Chris." I was surprised for his sudden change of mood. A while ago he was shouting angry, now he was milder and he looked gorgeous wearing a distressed bleached-denim jeans with large hole near his crotch which gives so much imagination of what was behind it.

He led me to a canvass with a distinguishable naked sketch. "This is a sketch of you I wanted to paint and will be included in my future show. You need not be ashame of having this shown, since you're not facing the crowd. Trust me, even up close they will not recognize you. Now, you can peel off your clothes and let's start."

With my heart beat thudding in my chest, I removed my shirt so slowly I seemed to be doing a strip tease for him. Then I unbuckled my belt, unbuttoned, unzipped and lowered my pants leaving a floral lace bikini by Victoria's Secret. It was the only cross-dressing I indulged on and I was really ashame to show it to him. My stiffening cock was barely concealed by the flimsy material and my penis bulbous head was distinctly outlined on my lacy bikini. I can't looked directly at him when he ordered me to remove my panty.

"I need you completely naked,." Damon said as he approached me.

I noticed a marked indentation of his crouch that makes me hornier. When I removed my bikini panty my 6 inches dick sprang up. "Hey we don't have to begin our work with this type of exhibition. If our male models can't help springing up their hardware, we allowed them to cool-off before posing. Do you need to masturbate?"

I felt my body temperature surged to my head. I turned crimson but I said "No. It's ok. I'll pose with my back to you, anyway."

Damon nodded and led me to a small stage and instructed me the pose I'll emulate. But when he was not satisfied with the pose I did, he hold my back and pushed my chest forward and raise my left hand as if I was reaching for something above me. He stretched my left foot backward and moved my right foot in an angle and so doing accidentally touched my engorged penis. My blood cells exploded into a lusting fireworks, my cock twitched sending pre-cum at its small mouth.

Damon shook his head and heaved a sigh. He backed up and scrutinized my pose. "Your pose is okey now. Just hold on that till you can then you can rest your arms while I paint your other parts."

I've posed for almost half an hour when I felt my body went numbed. My stretched hand was leaden and heavy. I persisted but for every added second my body strained with painful muscle spasm. I sighed and felt resigned. I lowered my numbed arm.

There was no complaint from Damon.

"You may rest If you wish, you may use the rest room at the end of that bar. There are new bath robe in the cabinet. Use one. After you had rested, pose for me again." He was noticeable milder and I even noticed a small smile forming in his lips though his eyes were still penetratingly glazed. I wore my pants without wearing my bikini panty.

Just then, Damon's land line rang. He looked at me as he talked with his caller. When he lowered his mouth piece, he said acidly. "That was Cynthia. Three of our models just met an accident as they drove home after the practice. A stupid drunk driver has rammed their car, they're lucky they were not killed. She insisted you return to the house since she can't solve this problem alone. You may go now."

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Ram was a close friend of Archie Herrera, the CEO of the Citywide Fashion Festival who handled most of the country's fashion shows. He directs runway choreography, the set-up, music, visuals and in some cases the models. Our house has its own contract models whom we used to present our creations to very prominent customers. But with the accident we had to rely on Archie's own models for our forthcoming show.

"Call up Archie," Cynthia suggested when I went back to the office. "You more than ever can force him to move heavens on short notice."

I heaved a sigh and shrugged my shoulders. Cynthia knew Archie's feelings for me. I have tried to shun all his advances and invitation in the past since I fell in love with Damon. I no longer have a choice now but contact him.

The fashion show opened with pomp and flamboyance, very Archie Herrera. Music, choreography and the models had given justice to all our creations and the show went fluidly glamorous.

Important socialites of the metropolitan elite with a generous sprinkling of wives of important politicians graced the occasion. Actresses and actors were with other artists, both known and respected in their chosen arts. Everyone applauded heartily as each model paraded at the ramp.

I did not notice that Damon was with the crowd if not from the announcement of the known TV host whom Archie hired as emcee. "Ladies and gentlemen, before we finally call for the curtains, Ram Rodriguez House of Fashion is proud to present the heir apparent to this prestigious house of haute couture. May we present to you his son, the very handsome Damon Rodriguez."

He was so debonair as he went upstage in a dazzling midnight blue evening wear with black tie. I could hear gasped from women audience and when he smiled and waved at the crowd, he was given a thunderous applause. When the crowd quieted down, he made a stirring thank you speech. asking his father's patron to give him a chance to prove his worth as he continue Ram's legacy of stylishly dressing the beautiful glitterati of this part of the world.

I was with the models at the dressing room when Archie joined me. "Congratulations to an evening well done," before I was able to avoid him, he hugged and kissed me possessively in the mouth.

Just then, the door opened and Cynthia with Damon at tow, entered.

Damon's faced flushed and shook his head. He was about to retract when Archie met him. "Oh there you are, Damon." He extended his open arms and embraced him. "That was a beautiful show and a nice welcome speech. Ah, but I noted the women ogling at you. You were a bombshell!"

"Thank you Archie. Actually we've been looking for you. Let's celebrate my first entry to my dad's world of haute monde."

"Let's not go far then. Come on at Sage Bar. Nice place. Good foods. Lots of drinks. And I like tonight's band. Come on guys, join us," he motioned at us and led the way. He possessively held Damon's wide shoulder and guided him to the ground level. "I always have a reservation here every time my patrons have fashion shows."

True to his words, as soon as our party appeared at the bar, the maître 'd met us and guided us near the stage where a band was performing live. Archie dominated the conversation and I was surprised to see a submissive Damon laughing at his antics and stupid talks. I felt extremely jealous as he took all opportunities and chances to hold and touched Damon as he spoke. Nobody seemed to noticed but I knew Archie did these touching on purpose. He even kept toasting with Damon for the success of the show.

The bar closes at two a.m. but Archie invited Damon to his pad to continue the party claiming he has a special at his dig. When Cynthia politely declined, I was forced to go with her since I was not personally invited to join them. We all went out together and I saw them as they stopped at Archie's car.

I could have bled in jealousy since I know how Archie took advantage of the men he invited to his suite. My teeth gnashed as I drove out of the parking lot. I was not able to sleep till morning.

"Still excited of last night's success? You looked haggard and bloodshot." I smiled wanly at Cynthia's greeting when I reported for work. "By the way, please bring these papers at Ram's penthouse. Damon was asking for you."

"What? This early? I thought he was at Archie's?"

Cynthia just shrugged. "Just go up there before he holler for you."

Ram's penthouse was at the 18th floor of this building. Clutching all the leading newspaper in an arm, I went to the elevator. I noticed that almost all the papers were opened at the Lifestyle section where last night's fashion show was shown.

I knocked and when Damon answered I entered and was met with his clothes strewn at the floor of the living room. Ram's bedroom was opened and I saw him sprawled at the white water bed. As usual he does not have a stitch of clothes on. "Damn, but I'm so sick," he growled. "I should not have drunk those spirits at Sage. I just can't insult Archie by throwing all of the wine he was toasting with me. Fuck that man. He just can't hold his hand at bay. He kept touching me and my dick. Hell, what does he think of me? I'm like my dad?"

He rattled on and on till I got the picture Archie had not had his way on him after all. I felt so light-headed and elated. "Hey, get me a cup of steaming black coffee, will you. I felt the room spinning I can't stand still."

Right then, I can do anything he wanted.

I rummaged at Ram's tidy cupboard and found coffee, creamer, sugar and assorted instant noodle mixes. I was so inspired, I hummed inwardly. I heated water for Damon's coffee and when I served it to him, I found him reading the papers I've brought for him.

He smiled at me when I put the tray beside him. "These write-ups were terrific. It's almost sensational. Does dad received these same accolades each time he presented a fashion show to the public?"

I was euphoric at his change of mood I was not able to answer right away. Much more I was greatly stressed at his nakedness I kept glancing at him and looking away fearing it might change his mood.

"Mmmm. Actually, yes," I mumbled.

"So what's next now? After all these write-ups what do we expect?"

"From today, Liza's marketing department will handle everything."

"I forgot about Liza, remind Cynthia of arranging a meeting between me and her. By the way, would you see if my car was at my slot in the parking area? I don't remember driving here this morning after the party."

"I did not saw your car when I get in," I really did not saw his car in the parking lot that's why I believed he was with Archie.

"Fuck," he stood up and swaying he went for his pants. I gulped when I feasted on his bubble butts without him seeing I was gaping. He rummaged at his pants and found his keys. "Ahh here they are."

He caught me again staring at his nakedness and I was surprised when he laughed mirthfully. "You keep staring at me like that and I would believe you're lusting for my body just like old man Archie."

I blushed crimson. "Come on, I know I owe you one for last night's success, do you like my body?"

I gulped drily and with tears forming in my eyes, answered honestly. "I don't know if you'll believe me Damon but I came to love you first time I saw you. I love you as a person, not as a sex object. It must be correct to say, I love your body." For the first time, I looked straight into his eyes and saw his amazement.

"Hah. What could I say? I was displaying my wares for you to love me more?" He opened his mouth and shook his head "That was mind-blowing coming from a person of my own sex. And what do you want me to say or much less react?"

"It's up to you for I really don't know your answer neither your reaction. But I have to open up my feelings for I wanted to be honest with you. I wanted to stay with you as long as you need me and I could only stay without deceiving you for what I feel for you."

He stood up but wore his pants this time.

"Let what you told me sink in me for some time, ok? You knew I am straight but I still have a soft heart for gays because I grew up with a father who was one. Besides, I can't hate you for what you just told me. You've got all the rights for what you feel." He shook his head and handed me his keys. "Let the guard take care of my car and send Cynthia up here. I need fresh faces to clear up my mind." He directed the control switch and opened the curtain overlooking Makati's skyline. The city was smog free and there was a clear blue sky.

I felt relieved and found peace for myself for his sudden change of mood. I even felt a quaint happiness budding in my heart as I told Cynthia to see him.

Damon did not see or call for me the whole day, neither the following days. I felt lost and uncomfortable at this sudden loss of contact. After our encounters in the past, I found him to be a part of my daily existence. I wanted him so much, our sudden loss of contact has tolled greatly in my emotions. Had he been mad at me for revealing my love for him?

Am I at fault for loving him?

This was answered when I received a call from him, this time through my cell phone. "I'm home. See me." Four words and he closed the line.

It seemed that every dark feelings deep inside me was lifted. I felt light-footed and gloriously happy as I drove to his condo. That was one of those rare cool words I heard from him. There was no feeling in it. But I knew, he was not angry at all.

All curtains of Damon's glass windows were closed when I entered his suit. It was dim inside there was no light on but the pin light on his bar. He was on a stool, naked as usual nursing a high ball of clear liquid I've guessed to be gin.

He stood up to meet me and to my amazement, his dick was erect, thick and erotically pointed at me swaying slightly as he walked. He grabbed me and kissed me fiercely grinding his dick at my belly.

I was momentarily surprised at his unexpected audacity. But soon returned his kiss passionately clinging to his bare body whose warmth ignited me into flaming desire I've never felt for a man before. I needed him now. I felt I needed him inside me so badly!

His mouth engulfed mine almost biting me recklessly it almost hurt. His tongue invaded my mouth, the intoxicating taste of gin inflaming my desire to respond to his kisses the way he kisses me.

I clutched at him tightly as my knees turned to jelly. He hugged me and bit my lower lip when he released my tongue.

I matched his kisses tasting him sucking his tongue which he evaded and instead sucked mine so hard I almost lost my breath.

I felt on fire as I tried to match the intensity of his hot mouth his stubbles scraping the soft flesh of my lips..

I closed my eyes and relished his sudden change I haven't expected to happen.

All of a sudden he stopped kissing me. He pushed me and lifted my silken shirt and almost tore it off my body. In a shove he pushed my pants and panty down and hugged my naked body fiercely to his muscled hairy torso.

With our mouth still fused, he stood, carrying me with him.

I was astounded; with my heart beat thundering in my breast he carried me to his bed. My God, he was so strong and for that brief moment, I laid my head on his chest and enjoyed that tender moment and his warm skin.

He laid me on the edge of his bed and with his piercing dark eyes looked intently at me as if deliberating what he'll do next. He fiercely pulled my legs till my butt rested at the edge of his bed. He spited on his palm and smeared it on my hole He sucked his forefinger and inserted it on my slit. He was looking at my face as he rotated it in my sphincter. I don't still felt pain though he did it forcefully. I smiled to encourage him to go on.