To My Senses Ch. 05

I wanted to be around people. Humanity. To get lost in, drown in a crowd. I wanted to feel anonymous.

I didn't feel the cold in my jeep as I drive through the cold winter evening. My need for people felt desperate, hungry, almost panicked.

The acidic orange streetlights glanced off the hood, dazzled the windshield, glided away behind me as I drove. I felt unhinged, disconnected, the black streets, white snowbanks, peaceful houses disappearing on either side of my windshield like I was watching them on a television.

Not real.

I pulled into the multi-level parking garage under lights as bright and white as a hospital operating room. The gray concrete garage was frigid, and I hurried through it to the sliding doors.

The inside of the Mall Of America was warm, and I could feel myself relaxing as I walked through the crowds of people. Even after Christmas, even late in the evening, the mall was still filled, and I wandered aimlessly, staying in the multitudes, floating along, letting the familiarity, the advertisements, the feel of being in an unthinking moving mass calm my mind. Nothing else existed.

I didn't exist. I wasn't me.

I was just a guy in a crowd.

I wound up in the food court after wandering the hallways and balconies. I leaned against a pillar, looked across the sea of tables. That, right there, had been our table. Me and Cady and Mike and Colette and Nina. That's where we'd spent uncountable hours talking, eating, laughing.

That's where Mike and I had planned our assault downtown. Where my life had gone wrong.

If I had just said "No" a little earlier, if I'd decided to let the authorities handle it -- or not, if I'd just let it go... I'd be with Cady right now. Married, definitely.

I'd have someone.

I wandered past the sandwich kiosk, and looked for Amy, knowing she wasn't there, looking anyway. Nope, a whole new crew of high school and college students.

One of them saw me standing, staring somewhere between the menu above and the staff below. "Can I help you?"

I laughed, feeling disconnected. Responses flitted through my mind, all of them witty, none of the jokes graspable by the young woman asking the question. I waved dismissively. "No thanks."

There was a liquor store on the top level, and I glanced over the bottles, looking for something familiar. What was it my dad drank? Had drunk? Knob Creek Nine?

It didn't speak to me, particularly at the price point the store sold. I saw a frosted white glass bottle that triggered a memory, and I chuckled, laughed stupidly. I took it from the shelf, turned it around and around in my hand. The spidery black writing said "Chopin."

I bought it.

###

Back at my parents' townhouse, I set the bottle on the kitchen counter, contemplated it close up.

I felt drunk already.

How did one drink vodka?

Fuck it.

Ice clinked in the glass and I covered it with the clear, slightly oily liquid.

Time to drown.

The vodka was slightly sour. Cold. Tasted of bitter flour. And water. At least it didn't burn like the whiskey my dad drank.

I drank some more.

At some point, I called Tori, fingers stumbling on the screen of my phone. Her voice was tired when she picked up on the fourth ring. "Yeah?"

"I've never been drunk. Is this what drunk feels like?" I laughed long and hard and hollow.

###

"I'm gonna miss this," Colette said with a gasp.

"Me too," Mike replied.

He kept rutting back and forth, prick held between her tits. He came with a groan, streaks of pearly white jetting across her clavicle. She flinched as it splashed her neck, again and again.

I turned my attention from my friends and focused on the tiny Latina beneath me. I thrust hard, violently flesh slapping against flesh, driving depending into Tori's snatch, pulling almost all the way out, filling her completely, withdrawing to the head. Each slam brought a shouted squeak of pleasure from her.

I drove deep and held there, prick throbbing as it spat cum into her quivering vaginal depths. Tori arched and cried out as she felt my climax, clutching me to her. Only letting me go once she felt my erection start to soften inside her.

I withdrew, flopped off onto the living room floor, groaning repeatedly at the ceiling, the plant-stacked shelves around us.

"Dammit..."

Colette practically dove over to the Latina, covering her body with hers, thrusting her tits into her face for the smaller girl's questing tongue. Pink muscle stroked against pale skin, cleaning it of Mikes's spending, and once the clear and white liquid was wetly stroked from skin, the blonde flipped around loudly tongued my spending from her girlfriends snatch.

I rose and watched the sapphic display for a moment, headed into the kitchen. Two bottles of blue Gatorade for my oldest friends, a bottle of water for Tori, and half a tumbler of Chopin vodka in the rocks for me. I took half of it in a swallow, coughed gratingly as the alcohol scorched nerves in my throat I wasn't ready to have burned.

I refilled what I'd drank, brought the drinks to my friends in the living room.

"It's your going away party, what do you want to do?" Tori was asking Colette.

"I think...I dunno...I think I've done everything I want?"

"Seriously?" Mike asked. He leaned in to kiss his girlfriend's shoulder. "There's nothing you wanna do, nothing you wanna try? This is probably the last time we're all together."

"Well... Maybe a few ideas..."

Colette was transferring her credits to a school in California so she could be near the ocean. She'd always wanted to surf, and when the transfer opportunity came up, she took it.

One more person leaving me.

Mike had returned from New Zealand, and while it was nice to have him back in town, he seemed different, distant.

He hadn't had a problem at all with what his girlfriend and I had been doing, and when she proposed the idea of a little goodbye group sex, it had only seemed weird to me for a few moments of consideration.

Having made my way through some really kinky circles in Minneapolis, this was nothing.

Colette wanted to be the center of attention at her goodbye orgy, and she directed and arranged us into the positions she wanted.

Tori on her back so the blonde could sixty-nine her, me between Tori's legs so I could alternate between the Latinas pussy and my former roommate's mouth, and Mike behind and inside her.

It was weird -- kind of -- seeing my best friend nude, fucking a woman I'd been fucking regularly, and fucking regularly with Tori. Somehow he'd put on even more muscle overseas, and added even more tattoos. He looked terrifying. But the gentleness with which he stroked his girlfriend's sun-colored hair after slowly penetrating her, the care in his voice when he asked if she was doing alright, was exactly what Id remembered.

It was also at odds with the scene from the corner store. The gentle giant could be as violent as he looked.

Colette jerked me off for a moment, head lowered to Tori's bald snatch for some oral attention. I watched the Latina twitch and shiver at my roommate's touch, trying to keep my eyes averted from Mike pounding her from behind.

Eventually, Colette raised her head and flashed me an erotic smile. "I can't wait to get spit-roasted by your cock..." She fluttered her tongue over my member, then wrapped her lips around it, sucking and bobbing her head as much as she could in this position. I straightened, guided her hand away from my prick, and began thrusting, holding her shoulders like Mike was holding her ass. She moaned happily and began trying to move with us, bouncing slightly between our cocks as we pushed into her from each end.

I extracted my dick from Colette's mouth and angled down between Tori's labia, shiny wet with excitement and sweat and cum. Her tunnel stretched deliciously around me, drawing a gasp from me as I filled her.

Dammit, that felt good.

I lifted her knees and began thrusting, and Colette gave me a naughty smile before lowering her mouth to where I was joined with her fuckbuddy, licking and kissing Tori's spread-open slot.

The Latina at the bottom of the pile moaned and began shifting as we fucked her, similar noises coming from the blonde's mouth as her boyfriend pounded against her ass like a jackhammer.

I pulled out of Tori, replaced my cock in my roommate's mouth, and began fucking her face again.

We changed positions after each of the girls had cum twice. More Gatorade for them, more vodka for me, and Tori disappeared into Colette's bedroom for a while, returning with a strap-on. She settled back in the recliner, and crooked a finger at the blonde. "Wanna help?"

Colette, curled up with Mike on the couch, shook her head, a cutely petulant look on her face. "This is my orgy, I don't have to do ANYTHING."

Her boyfriend rolled his eyes, and she laughed as he pushed her flat on the couch, laughed louder when he blew a raspberry on her stomach. "Git over there!"

"Nuh-uh!"

He straightened, pulled her across his lap, and gave one asscheek a hard but playful smack. "Git!"

Giggling, Colette crawled off the couch and across the floor. Tori made a great show of lifting her legs to slip into the harness, and then the blonde was wiggling her ass at us as she bent over the Latinas pussy, alternately licking it and the bulb set to slide inside it. Tori's eyes widened and she gasped erotically as one end of the dildo slid up inside her with help from her friend, and then she stood, pulling the straps tight around her waist and legs. The rubber phallus bobbed heavily in front of her, and she waggled her eyebrows and made a come-hither motion at Mike.

Eyes danced guiltily towards mine, and then he shook his head at Tori. "My baby here is the center of attention tonight."

Colette crawled back across the floor and put her head on his knee, and he petted her hair for a moment before reaching down and tickling her armpit, making her laugh and jump back across the floor. "What was that you wanted to try?"

I've been in a lot of kinky situations. Being the young organizer for Minneapolis's kink community does tend to expose one to sexual situations the average person doesn't usually experience. Getting a blowjob from a woman while penetrating her with a carrot. Dripping hot wax on a girlfriend, while her boyfriend was handcuffed to the dresser. One chick got off on being pissed on in public -- and while I'm not a fan of watersports, seeing a hot little brunette literally chained to the pipes in a park public restroom wearing nothing but heels and a club dress around her waist while begging me to take it out certainly tripped my trigger.

Hadn't ever done anything three on one before, and certainly never with my best friend.

Colette directed her boyfriend to lie on the couch on his back she straddled his lap, reached down to guide his massive member into her slick depths, taking him fully with only the slickest hint of a wince. I watched as she rolled her hips, riding him sinuously, making petite groans as she stretched herself on his rod. Blonde hair swinging, she looked over her shoulder at me. "You wanna get behind me?"

"As in...?"

She left one hand on his chest, reached back to pull one taut buttcheek aside, stretching her little pink pucker and showing me lewdly what she wanted.

I moved to kneel on the couch, very aware of Mines Mike's body, his legs under his girlfriend. Tori handed me a bottle of lube and I squeezed some into my hand, used it to slick up my cock, squeezed out another puddle and slipped two fingers gently into Colette's back passage. She groaned as I stretched her rectal chute, pumping slowly, feeling the artificial tightness caused by the massive member moving back and forth, just a thin membrane of flesh away.

"I'm ready," Colette breathed. She lowered herself to Mike's chest, reaching back to pull her cheeks apart with both hands.

Moving gingerly, I lined my tool up with her rosebud, and leaned forward, supporting myself with a hand on the couch.

At the first touch of pressure, Colette pushed back, the little orifice flaring, holding open as my cockhead slipped in. The blond groaned again, shifting as much as she could, despite being skewered in two holes. "Keep going."

Now inside her, I relocated my hand to her hip, steadying myself further as I impaled the skinny college girls ass. The passage was slippery, but tighter than usual due to the rod filling her vagina, and I took longer than normal to completely fill her ass. Once my hips were pressed against her muscular cheeks, I began moving, trying to match the movements of my friends beneath me, while not touching Mike.

Colette was in ecstasy with the two of us sawing in and out of her, grunting and crying out incoherently at the sensation of being so used.

Tori approached, rubber prick dangling before her, and Colette leaned off her boyfriend's chest to take the imitation penis in her mouth.

That quieted her down significantly except for moans and wet glugs and slaps of bodies moving against wet holes. I think Colette came twice from our triple penetration, convulsing, back arching, holes clenching down around us so hard we had to stop moving into she stopped quivering.

As much as I enjoyed fucking her, as much as I enjoyed the domination aspect of three-holing the blonde, I couldn't get there. I couldn't finish.

It probably had to do with Mike. Fucking someone next to your friend is one thing. Fucking someone WITH your friend is another. I slowly withdrew, and Colette popped up from giving Tori's realistic strap in a very realistic blowjob with a look of surprise.

"You want to switch?" I asked the Latina. "I'm gonna go wash up."

"Sure." I rose from the couch and the Latina moved to take my place, awkwardly settling between Mike's legs, leaning forward to slowly penetrate the orifice I'd just vacated.

"Would you rather be getting a blowjob?" Colette asked, in between grunts from the reaming she was receiving.

Now that tripped my trigger, in a very illicit and kinky way. "Now?"

"Now."

I looked down at my erection, glistening with lube only. Clean as if I'd been in her pussy instead of her ass. "Sure."

I stepped over to stand by the arm of the couch where Mike had his head on a pillow, and his girlfriend turned her head to take me hungrily into her mouth. Her movements were jerky, given the momentum being applied at the other end of her body, but she slurped and tongued at my shaft, blowing me enthusiastically.

Closing in on climax, but not there yet.

I put my hand on her silky, dirty blonde hair, began guiding her face up and down my prick with a little more force than she was using, spearing the sensitive crown into the back of her throat, making her whimper as I fucked her mouth very similar to the way her boyfriend and girlfriend were fucking her other two orifices.

I looked down at my former roommate, clearly in submissive, sexual bliss from the rough handling she was receiving, couldn't help but notice Mike watching me fucking his girlfriend.

I closed my eyes so I wouldn't have to look at him.

I finally got off, and Colette made a happy noise of arose as spurts of cum splashed the back of her throat, tightening my entire body with each pump, my toes involuntarily clenching in the carpet as she brought me to an extended orgasm. Looking down, I saw she'd been watching me, eyes cast up at me affectionately. Any other man would have loved the sight, been lucky to see it.

I pulled away and she grinned, reached out to first my erection and give it a few slimy pumps. "Have fun," I told her, leaned down and kissed her hair. How many times had I fallen asleep with my nose buried in it? How many times had I pulled it back tightly to force an arch into her spine?

How many times had I watched her comb it as I passed by the bathroom?

I retreated to the bathroom to wash off my prick, take a leak, sip my vodka. My heart was hammering, and it wasn't the sexual exertions. The room felt too small and my ears rang, the walls crowding me as a headache bloomed behind my temples. My whole body ached, hip, back, head, chest, fuck, my arm was on fire.

Bending into all sorts of positions like some kind of sexual contortionist for my roommates going away party may not have been the best idea, particularly when alcohol was numbing the complaints my body was surfacing.

I drank some more, held up my hand in front of me. It was still.

See, no problem.

By the time I'd exited the bathroom, Mike and Colette had retired to her room. Tori was waiting for me in my bedroom. I'd have to empty it soon, just like the living room and Colette's room had been emptied.

I'd had to move my life with her into the house where my dead parents had lived.

I raised the tumbler of ice-cold vodka to my lips, barely tasted the liquid as it flowed across my tongue.

The Latina leaned back against the wrought-iron footboard of the bed, gloriously oblivious to and comfortable with her nudity, her small, golden-brown body toned and tight and sending blood coursing towards my half-chubbed dick. I looked her very obviously and she smirked at me. "They took the party to another room. Privately."

As if on cute, a female voice cried out, plainly obvious through the wall, plainly in sexual enjoyment.

"I hear that." I looked her over again. Her tits were full, firm handfuls capped by dark brown nipples. Her stomach was toned and muscular, but still soft and feminine. Her bald pussy was tight and compact, the fleshy lips pressed together, and I yearned to spread them. Her eyes... Her eyes though were betraying desperation, fanaticism, fear, behind a veil of bravado. "I'm gonna fuck you so hard you drown her out."

"You're gonna fuck me?"

"Yeah." I stepped closer, took another swig.

"Gary?" There was something wrong in Tori's voice. Worry, pain, fear, a hardness, an edge like a razor.

"Yeah?"

"I..." she trailed off, stared at the floor.

"What?"

With an apparent effort of will, she raised her eyes to mine. "I know you like rough sex. I want you to go beyond what we've done in the past?"

"Ok..."

"Take me. Pin me down. Don't stop. Force me." Another long pause where she fought to hold my gaze. "I want you to rape me. Hurt me."

A better, more sober version of Gary Galloway would've questioned this. Would've tried to intuit the nature of the request, provide comfort in a situation that felt perilously off-kilter.

A better, more sober version of Gary Galloway was not in the room.

I flinched at the words but welcomed the abandon they offered. The oblivion.

"You got it."

Tori walked over to my bookcase, turned on the black strobe light sitting on top, walked over and flicked off the overhead light. The darkness that set over the room was stuttering, purple and green, making our movements look jerky and our skin look alien.

The Latina walked up and stood in front of me. "Well?"

"How do I do it?"

"Hmmm?"

I fought to get the words out. "Rape you."

Even in the dark, I could see the grim set to her lips, the tightness in her face. "You're a guy with a hard-on, you'll figure it out."

I took another sip. "I may be drunk off my ass. I may have women and men throwing themselves at me in this city because I invented an app to help them get their rocks off. I may like rough sex, violent sex, whatever. I may be drunk enough to admit I mangled a woman pretty badly to keep her from hurting kids. But the thought has never crossed my mind to even begin to figure out how to rape a woman. The idea of fucking someone and them not enjoying it, not enjoying the pain if there is any... fuck, your gonna have to teach me."

Tori looked at me for a long while, then took the glass from my hand, took a sip, and guided me to the bed. She pulled me back on top of her, the blankets and sheets rustling as we hit, and we crawled up to the pillows. Her legs opened and wrapped around me, pulling me close, and her hands tangled in my short hair as she pulled my lips to hers.