All Comments on 'Toxic'

This story left me speechless with how many relatable and heartbreaking experiences were in it. Amazing, amazing work by an incredible writer.

Easily five ☆s, actually it's worth so much more than that.

Super story!

5

This story is so powerful it would stand up in a world outside of literotica. Congratulations on an excellent achievement.

This was a truly great piece of writing, dealing well with a tough topic. Thanks for sharing this with all of us.

You can be neither a misogynist not a feminist without at least some hate. The portrayal of low quality men as normal shows that you spend to much time with the wrong people. It's funny that you ask men to protect you from jerks but you don't want them to be the type of man who would. If you want to be around good men you have to be where good men are. Good people of either gender don't spend much time in bars or nightclubs. Alcohol tends to create bad behavior and good people know that.

Powerful story powerfully written. Prose with a purpose. Great to see that happening here. Good to see some fearless writing taking place. Good luck in the contest.

Excellent and very lovely story, Jez, with Gigi being a professional feminist who wants what’s right without making the character going overboard in her actions for her cause, giving the reader just the right mix of positive female empowerment without casting all men as evil idiots. Some certainly are, as we saw in a number of examples in the story, but most of us want women to be treated well, to be treated fairly, and to be respected as people and in regards to their wishes. As a male and father of daughters, that’s my only relatively-minor concern with the story; it could have used at least one other positive male (besides Ben and to a lesser extent, his dad) who didn’t come across as a misogynist. For example, I was hoping that Mr. Daniels would have taken Ben’s message to heart. On the other hand, including Candice as an initially somewhat-hostile interviewer and showing her transformation as the story unfolded was a great example of the point the story made and showed how people (unlike Mr. Daniels) can change. Finally, the background story with Michael Troy/Mickey gave it an emotional jolt that made it even more compelling, and the ending with that tie-in was perfect. Great job!

Beautifully written. And I love the comment about wanting equality not equating to an invasion of Poland

Equality.

Today's unicorn.

Women's lot changed mainly because of the industrial revolution.

Electricity and the internal combustion engine.

A woman can drive a 450 ton dump truck (and they do better than men at it) and do the work it once took the muscle power and stamina of thousands of men.

Trying to be more equal is a power struggle where power is gained by making others less equal.

Insecure people hurt others and themselves.

I:E men who feel powerless sometimes hurt their women by word or deed.

Not good.

But how do we empower all to live life to our best?

Chasing unicorns isn't it.

I'm not going to attempt to say what I could.

I like what SouthernCrossfire wrote, so I won't repeat it (except to state that I too was surprised how many of the men were Neanderthals, but maybe that's because Kate and I live in the NW US). Gave you 5 stars for a well-written, interesting story. Thanks.

A great story. Enjoyed it immensely.

One tiny nit and suggestion. In some of your stories you feature many, many characters and some of us feeble minded readers lose track of who is who. Maybe having fewer characters or somehow weaving their title/relationship/history into the narrative in an ongoing basis would help. Looking forward to your next effort.

You are one of my favorite authors. You write far more about the struggles of relationships, which is far more important to me than than reading about sex. I can see that a lot of men won’t like this story. It may make them think so hard their brains explode. Maybe that’s what a lot of guys need.

Very nice story.

To the other anon below, the point is that women (and men) should be able to enjoy a drink in a pub or a nightclub without being subject to harassing actions or comments. Telling people that they should avoid such places is another form of saying it’s the victims fault.

I agree with views expressed in this story, and I am a man. There are many good men out there, but there are also many others . While I do not harass women I have been guilty on occasion of not calling out inappropriate behaviour in other men. To do so can be difficult, and sometimes dangerous, but I agree that it is necessary to end harassment.

This is not just a story. This is an education. It held my attention from the first sentence and I nodded all the way through it, recognising similar people in 'my world'. Thank you for wording it so well.

Strong writing with a powerful, well developed MC. Well done.

You've created something really special here. You know it won't please everyone but you should be really proud of this. Thank you.

I loved your story. I think I’ve found soul mates in all of the stories by Australian authors. I really relate to Ben because I deeply love my wife who suffers from depression and anxiety.

Excellent writing, capturing a considerable amount of nuance in a short story. So much to unpack and I’m sure most, if not all readers will recognise most characters in your story from their own lives. Perhaps uncomfortably so. Five stars.

Thanks for creating this story, You've stomped on a lot of personal issues with this one. But that's not what I'm taking away from it. Putting it in perspective; It's the little things that you bring up, like the shotgun comment that to me as a then young dad, never sat well with me but couldn't pinpoint as to why it didn't sit right or how I could politely right that wrong comment. Or that stupid comment; "What is it a boy or a girl? Girl? Well as long as it's healthy...." and they never came from mean, controlling, aggressive or imbibed men, they were just ignorant repeating comments they'd heard all their life. Thank you for writing stories that provoke thoughts, put life around us in perspective whilst still giving us hope that a better world can be possible if we all think a bit more and deeper and do "our little bit" at times. .

5 stars

It would have been nice if there was a short dissertation on the birth control pill at some point. Also, the sex scene was short.

But it was a great story and I liked how you were able to twist a comment about 'not all men'. I saw what you wrote in the forum, I thought your tale was going to in some other direction.

Hopefully, people will read these things and take away something that will be meaningful in their own lives. It was good that it showed that not everyone is an evil idiot but that there are plenty who are. it is sad that the experiences in the story are relatable to so many women.

I really like the tags 'some readers will not like or get this' and 'feminism 101'

I finally read the whole story, the first two times I got interrupted and ten minutes later my mind doing it's automatic delete, wiped away all memory. I've added it to my favorites so I can read it whenever I want.

WOW. Tight and the letter made me cry. 5*

"I'm more intersectional" I laughed at that, I've used that line myself. <3

I found the story to be very descriptive but having a few issues with lacking positive opinions of self or lacking ideas of positive control to improve oneself.

One thing in the story I found to be sex-positive and empowering was near the end, when the main female character deleted the last text message from her former lover. THAT was making the better choice and taking control of her own destiny! But it didn't require her former lover to change, it required HER to change. So, in that regard, it was a good finish.

I struggled through page 1 and then gave up. The emancipated woman, complete with that nonsense of "gender studies" in college. I rarely will complete a story where I dislike all the characters. I really need someone to root for when I read a story of interpersonal relationships. Through page one there was no one, absolutely no one, worth thinking about, let alone root for. A main character who doesn't consider her welfare enough to invest in birth control pills? Has two abortions? I really hope this was not an autobiographical story because the "heroine" was not a very worthwhile person. 2* and generous at that.

Good story.

The one that bothered me the most after I had my daughters was, "too bad you couldn't put the stem on the apple." Assholes.

Sorry really boring. I made it to page 4 until I realized I just didn't care for any of the characters.

Well this story made me think, and that’s always a good thing. The first page or two seemed to drag on for me, but I stuck to it, and I really did enjoy the story. I’m not sure that I really liked any of the characters, except maybe Lou, but I ended the story with an overall good feeling. The letter at the end was a clever device to sum up the story.

You took me outside my comfort zone. For that, thank you for writing, and thank you for sharing your work.

Terrible. The way your characters behave is unlikely. Not everything in life has to be watched through feminist lenses, but when someone does chose to do so, it is just boring and inefficient.

It’s like using a hammer as a screwdriver.

Also, the self righteousness of G is simply appalling; she lacks humbleness. Her way of looking at things are just the measure of everything. Fortunately... Ben and her disagree on nothing (inbuilt bs) and everything they do, say, think goes back to the boring gender thing. Let me put it like this, food is good, but you don’t eat all the time, and don’t talk about it non stop, do you?

The sex part .... come on, who does build a teachable bs like the no means no and yes hell yes into it? I would probably just run, if I was still there.

And I say it’s bs because would you go to bed with someone who needs to get that reminder?

There was a funny part though: when Lou arrived while they were showering. Of course it was ruined by ‘excuse me for lying’ or something like that.

Going back to the character thing, each of them immediately show their colors in the gender topic you obsess about. That doesn’t happen. And they are too much black and white- no nuances.

And Ben in his confrontation with the school teacher... come on. He really is pussy whipped, in the sense he, too gives a boring speech instead of inviting the asshole to talk about their differences in a dark alley, which is what any civilized man would do.

What a thoughtful and interesting story! The main character, stuck on the relationships chapter, is a brave choice; as others have said, she is not very likeable, but her probable move into a good relationship may one feels make her much more so. For much of the story Ben is also stuck after the failure to rescue his wife, and his natural shyness, and that combination of characters means there is no warm and fuzzy core to the story. The surrounding experiences of male chauvinism and its uptake by women, particularly the stupid and ignorant condemnation of Ben for "driving his wife away" to her death, are very well integrated. Really thoughtful writing, more than worthy of 5 stars; so unfair that the chauvinists will probably give it one and so dissuade others from reading something really interesting.

Sooooo many character names to follow...!

And you can change the title to: GIRL TALK.

I loved your tags and this really was a good feminism 101 piece. Personally, I get so depressed with this much realism rubbed in my face that it stops functioning as smut. This works splendidly as literature, though! You write really well.

Thank you for participating in my event. I really appreciate it.

Great job, Sis.

Reading this, I knew not everyone was going to understand. We still have a long way to go. Thank you, Jez, for taking us a step in the right direction. This story brought tears to my eyes and you already know how I feel about it. I’m proud of you for writing this!

Thanks so much for this! Five stars from me, even though I thought it was a little rough in patches - after all, if others can loudly proclaim that they didn’t read past the first page but still presume to rate the story, some of us can sauce on some extra love to compensate.

Things that didn’t bother me… the theme, the incidents related, the QLD/Victoria divide.

Things that slightly bothered me - some inconsistencies in her character. I found it hard to reconcile her intelligence and specialisation with her wilful stupidity around her former lover - I suppose we can all be dumb when in lust, but that dumb? I found it hard to reconcile her humility in not speaking at the Reclaim rally with her lecturing of the couple at the cafe. Maybe I just cringed at that moment because that is not how you win hearts and minds in a small town and with a bit more maturity she could have handled it far better. And that made me wonder if her editors were likely being too soft on her writing… anyway, these are quibbles but thank you for putting your quill to this one.

Also, thanks for your authentic Australian voice!

Oh god, you brainwashed mental cases have slithered in here to. How does it feel, going through life not thinking for yourself? It is obvious you are all college "educated" white women. This is what is known as toxic femininity. victim mentality, no accountability and making yourselves depressed. by fictitious problems or problems that are nowhere near bad enough.

Even your name was an obvious indication.

Yes, lecture the small town cafe owner and staff, brilliant. Bless her heart. My favorite part of this whole "teach men to be better" and "teach men not to rape" philosophy/argument...the men who actually need to be "taught" that... aren't interested. And never will be interested. Try teaching the Latin Kings "not to rape" sometime. It's a positively delightful delusion that only exists in the minds of privileged women from the least oppressive societies on the planet. It's stupid, childish, and doomed to failure, but not before it's managed to cause millions of deaths and untold amounts of suffering. I wonder if her first child would have been healthy. Pity she'll never know. Rape is evil. Should still be punished with death. Sexual assault is also evil. Harassment and mistreatment is wrong, and a healthy community refuses to tolerate it. But your main character is an imbecile. All of these characters are imbeciles. (The little girl, Lou, is just a victim, the only exception, poor thing) And this story wasted an hour or so of my life. Also, the fire guy burned *himself* on the steps of the courthouse, not his kids. And was swiftly forgotten. Unless there's another story you were referencing. Either way, most (by a relatively slight margin) murdered children are murdered by their mothers, not their fathers, especially as infants, but the stats have (especially recently...how empowering) continued to lean towards mothers being more prone to filicide regardless of age, especially when death due to neglect is added in. And usually the father kills himself as well...the mothers don't bother/are able to live with it. Finally, equality is a lie. An evil lie, at that. No one is equal, in any way. No one will ever be equal, in any way. People are different. Different abilities, upbringings, genetics, the list is endless. And unless that changes, people will never, ever be equal. And if that changes, people will cease to exist, and there will only be "person". But that person will absolutely be equal. And absolutely alone.

Found it a little dry and slow in the early pages and then it really picked up and steamed through to a great ending.

The dedication to Micky was very moving and I loved the line from Lou "Pierce said she was a dirty feminist, but I told him that he was a misogynistic prick. I got that right, didn't I, Gigi?"

All told an excellent story and worthy of 5⛤.

Well if your aim was to make an extraordinarily pathetic,petty, disgusting and hate worthy character you did it in less than half a page. Bravo "jezebel".

It's NOT our responsibility as men to make women's lives easier. The entitlement is exactly why women deserve misogyny. Horrible story from a man hating feminist.

You want strong women, but want to create "compassionate"(read weak) men. You know that without weakening men, women wouldn't even have a ghost of a chance,even with all the female privilege women enjoy.

Men will ALWAYS be superior. Cope.

Excellent. Thank you for writing this as it gave me a lot to think about and imagine.

7 pages of a clueless supposedly intelligent dumb fuck Gerri/Gigi