Ugly American Ch. 01

I sat back in my chair before speaking. "This has nothing to do with my soon to be ex-wife Anita, and her consenting or not consenting. I intend to go after your firm in civil court for breaking into my house, trying to cause me bodily damage."

"Darrin the firm had no knowledge of Wesley's actions that day, nor did we condone or approve of any such behavior of the people Wesley had contracted as a private matter between he and your wife."

I adjusted my seat cushion, then answered. "Let's see if I got this right. A senior member, Wesley -of your firm shows up with two employees-also of your firm, in a moving van owned by your firm. Wesley was holding paperwork notarized by a firm's employee, for a firm employee, during business hours, and was acting as a supervisor with the two firm employees. Yet Wesley made no attempt to stop the assault by his two firm employees he managed. Hell Wesley unlawfully charged into my house, then refused to leave. I about got it right?"

He motioned to the waitress for a coffee refill. "Darrin while I am not admitting Wesley may have acted rashly, civil court cases can sometimes take decades to play out."

I shrugged. "I am not going anywhere, several law offices have already expressed an interest in taking this case on a contingency basis."

I named a well know firm, that caused an intake of breath from him before I continued. "The question you need to ask yourself is how are you and the firm going to deal with the constant depositions, endless legal proceedings, not to mention court time, cutting into the bottom line? Think of it as a 'Stupid Tax', a fee or fine if you will -that Wesley, and your firm need to pay for allowing this to happen."

"Darrin what are you looking for-Revenge? Take some friendly advice from an old man, it is not going to make you feel any better."

"I am not looking for revenge. Just my little piece of Justice. Some say there is no justice-in or out of court. But in this country, Justice means you get a check. The way I understand it, the bigger the check, the more the justice."

He picked up my napkin with the figure before looking at his watch --a very nice Rolex. "Darrin I will take your suggestion up with the other members of the firm."

I got up to leave, pulling some bills from my pocket, throwing them on the table. "Just to make sure there is no communications error. That number is neither a suggestion nor open to negotiation. You may have the watch, but I have the time."

++++++

I thought I was in for a long legal battle. Yet Monday morning brought a court server bearing a thick folder that included divorce papers as well as a large check in the amount I have written on the restaurant napkin. A long contract was attached, so I spent the afternoon with an attorney friend. The contract had the firm admitting no guilt, but required I not interfere in any extracurricular legal matters of its senior partners concerning the event at my home. The divorce let Anita walk away with only her personal possessions and no attachments or funds, but she got half our debt. Joint custody of AJ -with me as primary caregiver. No alimony, or child support on either side.

I was advised to sign the papers as quickly as possible. The Divorce was the best deal I could hope for. The check would pay off debts, get me and AJ some spending funds. As far as "interfere in any extracurricular legal matters of its senior partners concerning the event at my home." I could care less what happened to Wesley. It was the Assistant States Attorney's call anyway -not much I could do but make a lot of noise. Besides any man that takes your wife deserves her. I recall an old Groucho Marx saying that when a man steals your wife there is no better revenge then to let him keep her. I hoped that was true, at least I would at least get that Karma payback.

+++++++

About a year had gone by since the divorce from Anita was made final. All visits with AJ were made thru my brother who had Anita pick-up and drop off AJ at his place. This was at my request. I still loved Anita, and I knew it would tear my heart out each time I saw her. I hoped some time with distance between us, would eventually lessen the pain. My brother and sister-in-law tried to fix me up on a few dates with some nurses at the hospital, but I was not ready for the dating scene. My right hand took care of most of my needs, the good thing about masturbation is at least you do not have to get dressed up for your date. However at the end you are just screwing with yourself. I threw myself back into working out to fight off depression. I found swimming to be relaxing, a good way to tire myself out so I could sleep at night. Our local gym had a nice indoor pool, I spend hours there just swimming laps, losing myself in the water.

Naturally there was trouble in Paradise. AJ was at the age of normal teenage rebellion, then add in resentment at his mother.. well you had a combo for problems. It did not help that Anita kept sending postcards to the house of all her "travels". I had to laugh as they never seemed to venture beyond the tri-state area. No exactly the globe trotting I had expected. However these trips several times made Anita miss her scheduled visits with our son AJ, that built up his resentment toward her. I warned Anita thru my brother that if this kept up I was going to ask the court to give me sole custody of AJ. As much as AJ was upset with what his mother Anita had done to our family --her blowing off her visits with him were taking a toll-as with this last visit.

I hung off the phone with my brother and swore to myself. "AJ!" I yelled "Come in here now please."

AJ appeared at my door. "Yea Dad?"

I motion AJ to sit down before I began. "I just got off the phone with your Uncle. He said your Mom was very upset with how you acted on your visit. You want to tell me what happened?"

"Dad I hate going over there when Wes is around. That guy is a dick!"

"AJ you do not call adults by their first name. No matter how you feel about that..man. He is your mothers friend and you should at least try to be civil."

"See you cannot even say his name. He is still a dick Dad."

I tried to speak but AJ rushed on. "Dad he said Uncle working at the hospital as a pediatric nurse was not real "manly". The assclown keeps making stupid comments about 'girly' jobs. I thought college made you smart. He is sooooo stupid."

I was amused by that bit of information. My brother had a purple heart from the Gulf war. He had also been awarded the bronze star when his medevac chopper went down and he fought off an insurgent attack staying with the downed bird while keeping his wounded comrades alive until help had arrived.

It was hard to keep a straight face after AJ little speech. "AJ I know you think that man is an idiot, but look at this as a lesson that college just makes you educated-it does not make you smart. Only a fool talks like that. We both know your Uncle is more manly then the Pittsburgh Steelers defensive line."

AJ tried to say something , but I held up my hand to stop him.

"AJ did you tell your Mom you were going to put her in a second tier nursing home in Mexico when she got old?"

AJ grumbled something, so I told him to speak up. "Yea Dad --but their computer blows chunks. I think you gotta shovel coal into that relic to get it started. They don't even have a flat screen monitor! I try to use my laptop but the wi fi connection sucks-if the download speed was any slower we would be going backward in time."

I let AJ vent for a while. When this whole visitation thing started I explained to AJ I would prefer he not give any information to his mother concerning my private life. I also let him know I did not wish to hear any details about Anita's life. However being a typical kid this just went in one ear and out the other. Between him and the details my brother kept letting slip from Anita's rants during her visitation pick/up drop off -I knew more then I cared to about my ex-wife's tribulations.

For instance, Anita complained endlessly how Wesley's wife had really raked him over the coals with the post nuptial agreement. During the divorce he lost the house, forfeiting a large portion of his share of the business. Wesley's wife had sold her share to a group of venture capitalists-which had demanded some measures that did not sit well with the firm. The other partners had not been pleased with the "Stupid Tax", they were making Wesley pay for it out of his share of the profits and bonuses. This put a considerable crimp in Wesley's life style.

Anita had threatened to go "Sexual Harassment" on Wesley if he did not put a significant carat ring on her finger. Anita was planning on the gala wedding she always wanted-our marriage event being a small family only affair. Wesley was fighting the "shotgun wedding", arguing for a week in Vegas, with a wedding chapel, due to financial constraints

By now AJ had run out of stream, he was merely whining.

"Dad I do not want to be in Moms wedding. It is the same day as the Salander swim meet. Can't I just skip this one and go to Mom's next wedding?'

I had to cover my mouth to stifle a laugh. This was going to be a long conversation.

+++++

You know the law of unintended consequences? How everything affects everything else-the butterfly flapping its wings causes a hurricane in the Caribbean kind of thing.

Well mine started with a simple question from my Manager. "Darrin you got a valid passport?"

"Sure both Anita, I and AJ got one before he got sick, then um well.." I just trailed off.

My manager was a good guy, he had cut me a lot of slack during the marriage difficulties, so he just jumped right in.

"Well look Darrin we just got an urgent call out from the suits at HQ. There was a car accident that injured our team from the South Florida Division. You are going to leave Friday to fill in with an engine job on a cruise ship." He grinned at me. "Not bad change of climate considering the weather." We were in his office so he motioned at the window outside where snow was piled up, while the temps were well below freezing.

"Um thanks..I think. Why me?" I stuttered. My company has been bought out by a large Multinational organization a few years back. Why they would want a small specialty control machine engine shop in an even smaller northern town I could not understand. But I was grateful for the improved health care and benefits they brought.

My manager leaned back in his chair. "Well you were in the Navy.."

"I served one hitch and never left Pax River after training at Great Lakes. Hell I've never been on anything bigger than a dinghy." The Navy found I had a knack for tech stuff, so I spent my military career (If you could call it that) working on Jet engines at the base in Maryland.

"So what." My Manager replied. "That's more then most guys, plus you do that biofuel thing, and this has to do with fuel additives -that kind of junk."

"But Boss -I just brew biodiesel in my garage! I am not a professional or anything."

"Darrin you do know that Professionals built the Titanic, while Amateurs build the Ark don't you?" He tossed a thick binder full of computer CDs at me. "You are the best programmer-slash-jet turbo tech we have. That combo makes you the one eyed King in the land of the blind."

"Be serious." I pleaded. "I can't leave my son now."

He leaned forward on his desk. "Darrin I know your situation, I have done my best to help you out. However I really need you on this one. Consider it a personal favor to me-calling in a marker if you want."

I did owe him, so I nodded my head, looking down at the binder full of info I'd have to learn.

"Oh Well" I thought "Either Be Good, Get Good, or Get Gone."

+++++

I learned modern cruise ships no longer use diesel engines to turn shafts with blades at the ends. Some of the current breeds have jet turbines generate electricity that powers dual electric "Azipods" hung aft below the ship like outboard motors. Theses Azipods gave the ships great maneuverability, being able to turn 360 degrees, allowing these vessels to do a complete circle within itself, or even move sideways.

While the electric jet turbines are cleaner burning then the diesels, the jet like fuel was far more expensive compared to diesel bunker fuel. Our company was testing out both camelina oil' & algae-based biofuel HRD-7. It required changes to complex sets of computer controlled varibles on the jet turbines. However a small fortune was at stake if our company could prove it works -as we also sold the controls, electric generator jet turbines, while also having a controlling interest in the biofuel refining for marine applications.

Thus the reason I was seated next to a scowling senior engineer, originally from Scotland, named Shane MacIssac. I had referred to him as "English", which from his reaction was as bad an insult as one can give to a Scot.

"Call me Mac you bloody fool." Mac told me as we sat on a plane for a set of flights headed to a port I had to look up on Google earth. "If you have anything to say-now would be the time to keep it to yourself. We are boarding a ship of the Royal Ocean line, She's called the ROYAL VIKING. "

"God I hope I do not get seasick." I muttered

Mac rolled his eyes. "This isn't no tug you stupid Yank. She's over one hundred thousand tons and is 17 decks high (16 as I found the ship had no deck 13). If she pulled aside your Statute of Liberty we'd be looking your Lady Liberty in the eye. This monster vessel has an indoor ice skating rink, Hospital, TV studio, nightclubs, conference center, movie theatre, shopping center, bars, everything you would expect from a small city-even a Farris wheel for the kiddies on the top deck, who have their own swimming pool by the way. The damn lifeboats alone are over 10 meters long-that is 30 feet to you Yanks, and they hold 150 passengers with supplies for a week."

"Mac if this is such a big deal, why not just wait until later when your team heals up from the car crash?"

"Couple of reasons laddie. Our company is not the only one in this race and we are already behind. We need to get a proven product out there on the market fast. The emphasis on "PROVEN". Ships captains and staff are a conservative lot, -leery of any new ideas. They don't trust nothing that could leave them dead in the water. Sometimes I think the damn blokes would still have sails on the ships. Second reason is it is tough to get berths on a good ship-them buggers is always full up. Any cabins they give to the likes of me and you is lost revenue. We had planed this trip way in advance because cabins would be open due to the ROYAL VIKING's repositioning and pirate fear."

"Pirates? You mean like Johnny Depp in Pirates of the Caribbean?"

Mac rolled his eyes. "Have you looked at your plane ticket you dumb bastard? The port we are headed to is near the African coast. I'm talking about them Somalia Pirate buggers. Don't you watch the news? I be talking about the kind of pirates your Navy SEALs took out." Mac stopped a flight attendant asking for a drink before continuing. "I'm from Special Boat Service myself, still we all tipped a drink or two to them SEAL lads on that operation."

"Shit Mac I didn't sign up to be walking the plank." I was getting a bit worried.

"Now Darrin you need not be getting your panties in a wad. Our ship be so far off the coast them little pirate boats never be reaching us. Besides you being a young single cowboy there be plenty of lassies in the crew to keep your mind off any Somali Blackbeards.

"Mac I not a cowboy. I never even been on a horse."

"Just the same, you keep your pecker in your pants until we get the job done." Mac took a long gulp of his drink. "Did you bring the stuff I told you?"

"Sure Mac." I answered. "What is all the candy and bottles of Aquavit for?"

"Listen my young charge, four things are currency on a ship to get things done. Booze, Porn, Candy and Internet phone cards to call home off the ship." Mac reached in his pocket and pulled out a fistful of phone cards. "Our satellite division handles the data off the ship so we can hand these out. The ROYAL VIKING's officer staff is Norwegien and the Aquavit gets us a lot of goodwill with the Captain, Staff Captain, and Chief Engineer. If this was a Greek flagged ship we would bring Ouzo, on a British vessel the officers prefer scotch or whiskey."

"You're kidding me Mac right?"

"No my boy I am not." Mac paused as the flight attendant took away his empty glass. "Look Darrin we are asking these guys to put in a lot of work hours on top of their normal duties without any additional pay, so any bones we can throw them helps. This crew can make or break the project for us."

Mac turned in his seat toward me. "The workers from the Balkans love tootsie rolls, while the eastern Europeans go crazy for bubble gum, Philippine guys crave milk chocolate. Got it?"

"Whole different world Mac. Whole different world" I said.

"With over a hundred nationalities on the ROYAL VIKING you got that right." Mac pulled out his laptop. "Let's go over our plan."

++++

Mac knew his stuff, he was greeted warmly by his old friend the ship's Captain, a blond giant named Sven. The bottles of Aquavit smoothed my introductions, while the crew was more than willing to help as we liberally handed out phone cards. I felt like it was Halloween, passing out pockets full of candy-but I was going to follow Macs lead as he had been right so far.

Our project was going well. After the first day of trial and error, I made the necessary computer adjustments to the turbines to accept our biofuels for maximum efficiency. The Chief engineer was wary, still wishing to run on their standard modified JP jet fuel. He kept delaying operating completely on our alternate fuels, even after running short time periods without any issues.

Mac was trying to cajole the Chief Engineer into a full scale test when I turned around banging my head into a bulkhead. This invoked a round of laughter from the crew, It did not hurt but my forehead was bleeding from a small cut. Dispute my protestations, the Chief Engineer told a junior Pilipino engineer to bring me to sick bay."

At the sick bay (or "Medical Center") I was stuck filling out countless forms --so I guess the ships hospital really was just like any hospital on land. Then I heard something, when I looked up there was the ships nurse calling out my name.

Her nametag had her country as one of the 'Stan's of the old Soviet Union, it read "Zoie" with a last name that I think contained the chemical symbol for Boron. But it was not the nametag I was looking at. This raven haired beauty was stunning. She had curves in all the right places, while her face had high cheekbones below oval eyes -a gift from some mogul ancestor, that were colored blue matching her medical smock. The smock did nothing to hide a killer figure. She looked to be in her late twenties, with her shining hair swept to one side -almost covering one side of her face. A megawatt smile revealed a neat row of white teeth. When she called my name the voice had a combination of eastern europe and british accent. The pain in my forehead was instantly forgotten.

Zoie the nurse asked me to follow her into the medical center. I stared at that sexy ass that was imitating two cats fighting in a sack, vowing to follow her anywhere.

As I was seated Zoie looked at my paperwork before speaking. "So Mister.."

"Please call me Darrin." I interrupted her.

"Certainly Darrin." Zoie said, giving me a hint of her 300 watt smile.

As Zoie took my blood pressure and vitals, I did my best to engage her in conversation. Zoie was gentle and professional, but my charms seemed to bounce off her like bullets off Superman's chest.

The ship Doctor came in, another blond Nordic giant, after a quick exam proclaimed me a bit clumsy, but fit, with no injuries, except to my pride. With that he shook my hand, then left.