Valentine Gift to Loving Wife

"You want it bitch," Russell grunted as he slapped Lisa even harder.

"Please no, a love tap is one thing, but this hurts." Russell did not stop but spaced out his slaps. Lisa had her face buried into the mattress. Without facing Russell, Lisa realized that she was waiting for Jared to flip her over where they would passionately kiss as they reached mutual orgasm. 'No, not again. I am with Russell, why am I thinking about making love with Jared?'

* * *

Jared also woke that Saturday morning without Lisa next to him. Lisa did not come through the door and did not call. Jared grabbed a yogurt, and then drove to his office which was empty on a Saturday. Jared wanted alone time. The combination of the solitude of the office and the mind-numbing research that he was doing helped to avoid thinking about his changed life. He called his brother and invited himself to dinner that evening. He got along well with his brother and his wife, Natalie. She was smart and successful in her profession, but also arrogant. Many people, including her family, viewed her as rude and had difficulty dealing with her. But Natalie got along quite well with her brother-in-law, and she and Lisa accepted each other as sisters-in-law although they were not close friends.

Jared brought his brother and Natalie up to speed. They listened and said all the usual expected things. Natalie challenged Jared because he so quickly surrendered her to Russell and had not fought harder for Lisa if he loved her that much. "What do you think is going through Lisa's head right now dear brother-in-law?" Natalie asked, and then answered her own question, "I imagine that she feels that you abandoned her. I would be hurting if I were in her shoes."

Jared understood Natalie's point of view, but the deed was done. "If Lisa is hurting, she will get over that soon, because this is the way it had to end. She will eventually relegate me to a distant memory, hopefully a pleasant one." The three talked a bit more before Jared went home to another quiet night in an empty home.

Sunday morning Jared picked up the Sunday morning paper. Lisa and he always enjoyed Sunday mornings with a cup of coffee, a bagel or a muffin, and sitting next to each other to solve that Sunday's crossword puzzle in the paper. He tried to do the same alone, but the coffee tasted bitter. He did not pick-up bagels or muffins as there was no one with whom he could share them. The crossword puzzle no longer seemed fun without the banter and touching that accompanied trying deciphering of the puzzle. His emotions were in turmoil, but there was a sense of finality and completion. Lisa was willing to sacrifice her happiness with Russell so as not to betray him. She dropped Russell to be with him, although she had clearly loved Russell and not him. It was proper that Jared should return the sacrifice. He remained comfortable that he did the right thing.

After attending a Zoom church service, Jared went for a long jog leaving his mobile at home. Upon returning he saw a missed a call and voicemail from Lisa. Her message surprised him. "Are you hiding from me you pathetic asshole? Pick-up the phone you sniveling coward. How could you have abandoned your wife like that? I was a good wife, and you had NO RIGHT to kick me out. I am not a CHEAP SLUT to be circulated between you and Russell. I am not stupid. You just want to be with someone else. Go ahead and pick-up some WHORE. I don't care because that SLUT will never love you the way I did. You are not a real man. Go live your fucking life with your stupid whores and I never want to see your pathetic face again. Do you hear me you BASTARD, BASTARD, ASSHOLE, FUCK YOU."

Jared could hear sobbing on Lisa's end before she terminated the call. He sat down and stared at the phone thinking 'What the hell? What brought that on? What did I do wrong? What did she mean when she said no one would love him the way Lisa did? Lisa never said she loved me.'

Jared thought of calling back, but decided to let things to calm down, and he would text her later to find a time to chat. He showered, and then did the laundry to make sure that all of Lisa's things were cleaned and folded, and in her closet so that she could take them away when she came to take her stuff.

The phone rang, and it was Lisa's mother. "Jared, Russell brought Lisa here. Please come." Lisa had indeed come to her mother to pick up what Lisa saw as the pieces of a destroyed life.

* * *

After getting out of bed and showering on Saturday morning, Lisa and Russell had a late breakfast, and went on hike through the local forest, a favorite pastime that she and Jared had also shared. Russell and Lisa held hands and talked. It was OK but the conversations did not flow as easily as when she had hiked with Jared. It seemed like both felt that they had to say something, anything, to break silences that went too long. During those silences, Lisa found herself again thinking of Jared. In her mind, while holding unto Russell's hand, she was making up a conversation with Jared that they would have had if he was there.

As they passed a lichen-covered rock, to make conversation, Lisa pointed to the rock and commented "I always love to see the strange things natures does." Russell looked and responded "Yes, it is pretty moss."

"It isn't moss it is lichen."

"What's the difference. They are all just plants."

Lisa did not respond but recalled a conversation with Jared when she had also pointed to such a rock "Jared, look at that beautiful lichen on those rocks. I love those plants."

"Mosses are plants. Lichens are not plants but a mixture of fungi and algae that live together sweetheart. The algal cells provide food for the fungus, while the fungi protect the algae from drying out and sun damage," Jared explained. 'Jared is so smart" Lisa thought. 'It is always fun to be with him because he knows so much.' She thought of the saying "Live in the present and make it so beautiful that it's worth remembering." But the present seemed to still involve Jared. 'I need to talk to Jared. But what will I say? Will I say that I miss him, that I am thinking about us fucking? No, that cannot be right. I am with Russell the man I always loved.'

After hiking, the couple ended up in a pub. Over a couple beers, they talked about Jared and his unilateral decision to let the two of them have the life they wanted. Lisa opined that Jared's action was typical him at his loving best. Russell's response struck Lisa like a 2x4. "If Jared loved you so much, why was he not man enough to fight for you?" Lisa now had another thought process further clouding her mind. Why had Jared so quickly surrendered and not fought for her? Her mind was confused as her brain jumped between contradictory thoughts, 'Jared loved me so much that he offered himself as a sacrifice for my happiness,' and 'If Jared really loved me, he would never had let me go,' and 'If he did not let me go because he loved me, then he would have proven that he did not love me because he was leaving me unhappy,' and 'I wonder how Jared is doing ... what did he do yesterday ... what is he doing today ... is he hurting or is he happy?'

Lisa made dinner. Lisa noted that Jared knew his way around the kitchen and the two often made meals together. She did not know if Russell could do anything because he did not volunteer kitchen duty. After dinner, the two made love again.

Lisa wanted, needed, to confirm that she belonged with Russell. They kissed. Russell dropped his mouth to her nipples, and then down to her sex. As good as Russell was and as hot as Lisa was becoming, she could not help but still think about Jared. Jared would place his tongue on her labia, and would kiss, lap and lick it, and then press his tongue as far as he could, teasing, playing, probing and impregnating her with his tongue. He would suck on her clitoris, twirling his tongue around her clit in the same way he made love to her nipples. 'Why isn't Jared's face in my crotch? I had shaved and waxed my pubes for Jared. Why isn't he accepting my gift to him? Why is he rejecting me?' Jared had devoted himself to her happiness, and had regularly satisfied her. Lisa again pondered why had she not thought of Jared in those terms before.

Lisa's thoughts were interrupted when, after the short ministration, Russell removed his face from her vagina and flipped her over and started probing. Russell wanted Lisa's anus. "No," shouted Lisa. Jared had invited Lisa to anal sex a couple times in their history, but never pressed after Lisa refused. She would say something like "Two out of three ain't bad," and then made sure Jared's cock found another target. Russell was insistent, however. "Lisa, don't put up a fuss. I have always wanted your ass. It may hurt a bit at first, but all girls eventually like it." Lisa now saw this unwelcome monster as he ordered her "Get on all fours." Lisa feared Russell's big cock piercing her sphincter, but could not stop him. He started to push his big cock into her asshole as Lisa's entire body shuttered with pain and with no pleasure. All she cold think was how Jared was patient and tender, and had always given her pleasure.

With Lisa not cooperating, Russell eventually gave up his attempted anal impregnation, and repeated fucking Lisa from behind. Lisa was no longer turned on, but still Russell's big cock in her pussy did feel good and gave her some satisfaction with multiple orgasms. But after Russell pulled out, Lisa did not feel anything.

Post-coitus (Lisa could not consider it afterglow), as they lay in bed, with her leg crossed over Russell to retain their contact, Lisa closed her eyes and her attention unconsciously again turned to Jared. Lisa had achieved more and seemingly more erotic orgasms with Russell than she ever had with Jared. But it did not seem to make much difference to Lisa's satisfaction. With Jared, she sensed his total love and the calm and protection of a man that was totally devoted to her. Much more than Friday night, Lisa had images of Jared on top of her, her playing cowgirl and reverse cowgirl on top of Jared and multiple other positions, and most importantly she recalled how happy and satisfied she had been at those times.

She was puzzled about her feelings. She should be ecstatic. She was supposed to be with Russell. She had always loved Russell and had given her virginity to him, and it was only her stupidity that caused the two to separate. But then why was she so fixated on Jared and how happy and satisfied he had made her? Lisa opened her eyes stared into Russell's eyes trying to dispossess her images of Jared. She started thinking about her future life with Russell. 'We will have a blissful marriage. We will have a family, and Russell would be as good as Jared as a father.' Lisa's eyes widened. 'Wait, was I seeing Russell's ceiling as a father to be as good as Jared?'

Further trying to convince herself that she should be with Russell, Lisa tried to think all the ways that Russell was better than Jared and why she should prefer Russell. But thinking through, Lisa could not find anything superior with Russell, except that he had a bigger cock and gave better orgasms. But those gave her immediate pleasure, but ultimately less satisfaction and happiness that she had experienced with Jared. Somehow Jared kept interfering with Lisa's attempts to convince herself that she loved Russell. Lisa then recalled that she never thought about Russell while making love to Jared, but Jared had taken residence in her mind when she was fucking Russell and he would not leave.

That night Lisa dreamt not of Russell, but of Jared. They were vivid dreams of Jared fucking her in their bed, and then they were surrounded by hundreds of people cheering them on as Lisa was screaming for Jared to fuck her harder. Jared was running through every fiber of her being. She was aroused. She recalled running her hand through his hair, and she recalled how cute she thought his butt was and recalled every sinew and vein on Jared's cock.

Lisa's thoughts then returned about how Jared was doing. Jared must have been in pain, and perhaps even physical pain after he dropped her off at the restaurant. She caused that pain, and now Lisa was hurting at the thought that she was the cause of Jared's pain.

Reality had met fantasy, and fantasy was losing, badly.

Sunday morning, Lisa saw Russell's morning wood, but did not seem as interested in ministering to that affliction. She recalled the morning before, and the thought struck Lisa that Jared had tasted better than Russell. 'So why are you not here Jared? Why are you denying me the pleasure of tasting you cock?'

Still, she was with Russell, and when Russel woke, they did have sex again with Russell this time in Lisa's preferred missionary position. But Lisa no longer felt anything. She had no desire to hug Russell or to wrap her legs around his torso. She was no longer making love with Russell but was being fucked, and she felt like a toy doll sperm depository. His kisses now felt like slime, his mouth on her breasts felt like cancer, and his thrusts felt like daggers into her heart.

Russell went to take a shower. He did not suggest that the two of them take a shower together, which is what Jared would have done. In fact, Jared would help with her hair and soap her body focusing on her breasts and vagina over which he would lovingly run his soapy hands while kissing the nape of her neck.

Lisa went down to the kitchen. She was disappointed. 'Why had Jared not had the coffee brewing like he always had? Oh -- that's right he is not here.' Then to double her disappointment, Jared had not brought any bagels or muffins. After making coffee, she went outside but did not see the Sunday paper in the driveway. She was angry that there was no paper and thus no crossword puzzle, but then Lisa recalled that there was no Jared with whom to do the puzzle anyhow. She loved Sunday morning when the two would faithfully open the paper to the puzzle and engage the loving repartee that accompanied their joint wordplay. And then they would attend Sunday Service together to thank for the blessings that their life had been. 'I cannot go to our church now. I cannot embarrass Jared like that. I will have to find another church where no one knows me and does not know what I had done to my husband.' More and more of the life that Lisa had enjoyed was falling apart around her.

Sitting with her coffee, Lisa could no longer avoid the inevitable climactic conclusion. She missed Jared like she never missed Russell. She wanted to be bedded by Jared not Russell. She was constantly thinking of how much better life was with Jared compared to Russell. Russell was a monstrous delusion she had created and the first person she had lied to was herself.

Lisa's brain was in overdrive. Lisa knew that her relationship with Russell was over. It was not even a difficult decision. As she later explained to her mother, "If you think of my stay with Russell as a film, my mind was on fast forward and doubling fast forward and then doubling again. I lived a lifetime in a few hours."

So why was she in Russell's home and not in the home which she shared with Jared? In Lisa's turmoiled mind the answer formed that Jared had rejected her. Did Jared love her? If he had, then he would not have sent her away, but he had even included an overnight bag! And he delivered her to Russell in the restaurant where she had intended to show off her hot outfit for Jared's benefit, not Russell's. More--Russell was already there in the restaurant. So Jared and Russell had made an old-boys deal for Jared to give away her to Russell without her consent. They had turned her into a piece of property and a slut. Would Russell be expected to return her to Jared once he tired of her?

Lisa was now internally raging. Jared had no right to decide who she loved or wanted to be with. She was not a slut and not a piece of ass to be circulated between men. Russell was not her lover who had won Lisa fair and square, but she had been gifted by Jared. How dare did Jared make such decisions for her? All Lisa could think about was that Jared would now go and make some other more-deserving woman happy. In Lisa's mind began the formation of the idea that Jared did not sacrifice himself for her, but instead Jared was freeing himself to find another woman who would be far more deserving of Jared than she was. But Jared belonged to her, and he had not right to go with another woman.

Lisa called home and tried Jared's mobile, but got only voicemail. So she left a voicemail that Jared would later hear totally surprised and totally baffled.

* * *

Having vented with the phone call, Lisa calmed down and contemplated why she had called Jared and why she was so hateful in her words. Now that she had spent the time with Russell, Lisa now recognized that that Russell was a delusion. She did not want to spend another night with him. Lisa wanted to go home and to be in bed with the man she had just cursed. She saw Jared as unique. His genial and kind sacrifice demonstrated how truly special he was.

Lisa then dressed and asked Russel to drive her to her mother.

Her mother provided the background details that led to the Valentine's Day dinner and Jared's sacrifice. Lisa, in turn, spilled her guts to her mother. Lisa talked about how Jared now camped in her head, and what should have been the best week-end of Lisa's young life was turning into a nightmare. Her mother had always liked Jared and so she was not totally surprised about Lisa's misgivings. She also understood the real cause of her call to Jared. She did what mothers do. She reminded her that it was Lisa who made the statements that Jared had overheard. Lisa had professed to love Russell and treated Jared as a duty. Jared, overhearing the two telephone conversations, made the ultimate sacrifice of returning her to the person that Lisa had clearly stated she loved and wanted to be with. Her mother encouraged Lisa to now recognize that she had to fight for Jared. Lisa had not rejected Russell when he was offered. Lisa had chosen Russell and spent two nights fucking him. She needed to talk to Jared and try to save her marriage before things got even worse.

"Why do you think that you left such an awful message for Jared?" Upon seeing Lisa hesitate, her mother continues "What were you really feeling when you called Jared -- such messages with such passion do not come out of nowhere?"

Lisa contemplated the question and then answered, "As crazy as it sounds, I think I was angry that I was losing Jared. I was having a panic attack that I would never be with him again."

"Not crazy. You were miserable and desperate, but why would you feel such anguish at losing Jared?"

Lisa stared at her mother as reality hit, "I made a terrible mistake, didn't I? I was blind and stupid. I really bungled my life. What now?"

"Talk to him."

"I can't. I am too ashamed. It was not some aberration. I wanted Russell and he gave him to me. Mom, I don't know what to do." After a moment of silence, Lisa added, "He likes you Mom, can you talk to him, please?"

"I will talk to him, but only to invite him to come over here. After that, it is up to you." She then called Jared.

* * *

When Jared arrived at Lisa's mother house, Lisa was sitting on a couch looking miserable and afraid. Jared took an easy chair opposite Lisa. Lisa's mother left the two saying she needed to go for a walk. A few moments passed in silence before either could say anything. Then, Lisa got up and knelt hunched in front of Jared. Separating his knees, she placed her hands on his thighs. She lifted her head and stared in his eyes. She had rehearsed what she wanted to say, but her quivering mouth could not form the words.