All Comments on 'Valerie'

Hmm~

Right

Dull. Lacked tension. ⭐⭐

This is definitely not a harem fantasy. More like a horny teenager's long stroke-story. Waste of time to read if you are looking more than some average erotic scenes.

Sure it did 😎

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2 **

"Some of you will dismiss it as just another male harem fantasy."

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I highly doubt that anybody is going to think that a story without a harem in it is a male harem fantasy...

It's all very trite and two-dimensional. No real discussion of the feelings or emotions attached to the moral dilemma or implications of what they are doing.

Even the description of the sex is kinda mechanical.

And it it's complimented, not complemented in this case.

garbage!

Managed first page but couldn’t get past the fact that they became wife swappers without any discussion whatsoever. Seemingly devoid of any emotion, marriage of convenience only.

Was that an advertisement for Waffle House?

Most of the 1st page seemed to set up one more page where she fucks Cletus, no more. (Keep in mind, a page here is about 7.5 in Word.) Then I saw it there were 4 more pages. My thoughts were, "What? Hoe can there be some much more of a story that seems almost done?" Then I saw: you needlessly bloated it with adding a 3rd couple.

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You might have had a tight, concise story, but instead you wrote a mess three times what was needed.

Beats the same old tired, worn-out, cliché-infested BTB or cuck stories that clutter the bowels of LW. Fun, imaginative, and sexy. The dialogue came off as too dry and too snarky at times, but hey, this isn't the Atlantic Monthly, is it? Nice work.

Greg is a weak man and I didn't care about him nor any of the other characters. I got tired of waiting for someone with some morals or self respect to show up.

More like cuck than Chuck. You Kiwis are a nasty lot.

A nice light orgy

Fact, fantasy or fiction?

And some humor. This is one thing I found humorous,..."searching for her clitoris with my tongue and lips. I found it instinctively. It was in almost the same place on all three women." It has as far back and as many as I can remember been at that same place.

Please keep writing and thank you.

Not sure why this is called Valerie, since her presence is truly minimal.

Nicely done, and an enjoyable read. The comment on the placement of the clit was peculiar - where else could it be? Maybe my circle of friends is different, but I thought women drinking white wine while men drank whiskey, port and red, disappeared in the 60s. I would have preferred a less narrative and more emotionally involved writing style too, but overall these are details which didn’t spoil a fun story.

Great erotic loving wife story. Keep writing. Sex swinging and every body in love and showing respect to each other.

What was the point? Was there supposed to be a plot? There are lots of animals that group together and fuck each other. Just begs the question, what is the point of being married? Not being snarky, but logical. Or better yet, what is the point of being in a relationship where sex is casual, recreational, somewhat promiscuous, and has no emotional or psychological significance? Some couples fuck better than other couples. So what happens when the best fucking is found to be between two of the group who are not married to each other. And the fucking is really Really better, like out of this world better? Like we can't get enough of each other and don't want to stop and don't care if we ever fuck anybody else better? Like we are guilty and try to hide our secret fucking hookups better? And we love it better, which become we love each other better?

\

I think that's how most of these group fucking arrangements end up falling apart. Which is pretty logical and should be expected. Which means everyone gets what they deserve, good or bad. Stupid people live fucked up lives. Your fantasy and word processor can't change reality and probability.

why stay married

That was a fun romp.

I hope that the other commentators realize that the wife carolyn was actually getting some side cock long before the husband got together with valerie. I guarantee that carolyn and her daughter who was adult worth both getting a little strange on their trips and that there was a test agreement between the two ladies that the husband didn't need to be informed of this.