All Comments on 'Was She or Wasn't She...My Daughter?'

@anon below me: LoL, do you have any idea what you're even talking about? First, it's really quite difficult to actually prevent data mining if somebody is determined to do it.

2nd, you just mentioned a russian fool. Do you really think a russian fool is going to care about copyright? While I haven't looked at the agreement between writers and literotica, I'd be very surprised if the authors are assigning copyright over to literotica. A site copyright probably isn't what you think it is. So, yeah, it's a more complex situation than you realize.

This story was just ripped off by one of those YouTube "cheating wife story" websites, and the Russian fool (she does the intro) is too stupid to realize she only stole the first two pages. I suspected since most of their other stories are stolen from here, so I searched the names, and, "Voila!" Why the Bimbo that owns/runs Literotica (Lauren?) allows these plagiarists to mine this site for material the thieves can monetize is beyond me. Yeah, this website has a site copyright. This is one of the most well-written stories I've ever read.

I do like this story. She admits she would never be a good mother, but she wasn't a good wife, either. In the end I really like the family as it ends up and even the ex redeems herself.

The only place for Lois is beneath a rosebush. The end.

I think the delightful way that this story was laid out was terrifying at first, tense second and heroically fabulous in the end. anybody who seems to think there were too many coincidences is a very shallow reader. (probably just reading for wanking material)

Well done. I would have made one change. The red Maserati would have been stolen at night during a car jacking resulting in the death of the driver. But that's just me.

I thought he had a Ferrari, but ended with a Lamborghini?

Too much coincedence.

That Loius and Jerry where despicaable people, why should they make friends with them?

jopstorm1945

The two children seemed to end up withe right parents in the end!

5

Damn 33, this tale is rife with coincidences, I can almost see Jimmie Stewart and the apprentice angel talking this one over, tis maudlin and I like it 5-stars worth - unbelievable or not.

Story had potential then went to crap. Not for any BTB but why would parents want to expose their kids to two deceitful, selfish, rotten adults? I think the writer went too far to concoct a United set of circumstances. He also went over board with the male M/C’s goodness.

A FIVE UNTIL THE LAST PAGE.

A charming story. It felt real to me. The characters jumped off the page. Thanks for this.

Just no.

Good job, from another Nam Vet. Four stars. JPB

Second read, by accident.

I think I liked it more this time, and even though the 'bump into the ex-wife' at the end was a bit contrived, the entire story was, in my humble opinion, well-written.

All things considered, I gave it 5 stars, mentally putting it into the "RAAC" category of stories, albeit somewhat 'bent' !

The Lois character was portrayed as a disreputable cheating bitch who fraudulently used the kindness and generosity of a loyal husband and father to her illegitimate baby, ended up ridding herself of said unwanted child while getting back with the shallow Jerry and his collection of imported cars. No redeeming qualities whatsoever

Both Lois or Jerry are immoral, self-obsessed, dishonorable, reprehensible human beings. They certainly make abysmal role models for young children.

If Brian and Chris will permit contact with the children they should minimally limit Lois and Jerry's time with the girls and be sure that one of them is always present when they visit. This is not an act of revenge but one of love for and recognition of their parental responsibility for the controlling the environment they will allow their children exposed to. It would be wise to make this clear to Lois and Jerry as a condition of their relationship.

Great Story!! I Loved It!!

I keep telling myself that readers are supposed to base their ratings on two things, both having to do with the "writing" of the story.

So: --1) Was the actual writing of this tale competent and the construction consistent with the criteria any writers' workshop instructor would think necessary for a clear understanding of what was being conveyed without distraction from mis-spellings, awful grammar and syntax, confusion in who the main characters were and did they remain logically relevant as the story progressed.

Conclusion: Yes, at a 5 star level.

2) Was the idea which served as the basis for the tale creative? Imaginative? Actually possible in real life and therefore believable, providing a context within which the story could play out without the author having to turn corkscrews to make an ending plausible? Or did the author have to play with the "deux ex machina" ("God in the machine, so to speak) which would magically appear and make everything turn out the way it should be-- which in this case was "happily ever after". Conclusion: Well...no. It looked like the plot development was going to fall into the "excellent" category (in my estimation)...and then along came Chris in the pizza parlor and suddenly the two sweet innocent little girls were united not only with the "right mother" for them both, but the "wicked witch of the west" Lois becomes all sweetness and light and dutifully transitions into a loving "doting auntie" for all the little kiddies. Sorry--not in the least believable...but sweet.

Conclusion: For most of the story 5 out of 5. For the "pull it out of the ass" ending from The Outer Limits of Credibility...being generous maybe a 2.

Averaging it out it becomes 3.5 which...because I actually liked the damn thing--4 out of 5.

But who cares what I think. You write well BaMuoiBa. Keep doing it. More please.

Gee, that was a handy little expose by two well informed bystanders in a barbeque joint just as the mc walked in!

The bitch skank Lois still has it good

Very enjoyable story with lots of twists and turns. I think you handled the questions of the improbabilities quite well! This is a second read - bumped it up one star.

Fuck Lois and Jerry!!!!

I gave it 5 stars for interesting story, although I'm tempted to do 1 star for rewarding the shit persons with good life wirh all they want and zero punishment. So 3 stars in the end.

cucks get one star

sure let the grandparents have a relationship, but never the whore

"Mom sat there crying. My phone rang. It was Lois. I turned it off. I have never been much of a drinker, but I took a bottle of Dad's whiskey, went outside and sat on the porch. He followed me. We sat there talking about the restaurants, mom's new car, my little league baseball team and our favorite movie, The African Queen. We talked about everything but Lois and Betty. At six, Mom came out and asked if we were hungry. We both said no. Twice Dad went inside to pee. I never moved. Midnight came and we were still there. He peed two more times. We never touched the whiskey."

Good stuff!

I really like Brian! He's not wasting a second being bitter or "getting even", as though something petty and vindictive you do after the fact can make up for past actions and hurt feelings... My man said FUCK FEELINGS and stopped caring, and his life was better because he moved forward instead of clapping back. 5 middle fingers to the haters, you think everybody should be a bastard because you are? Okay, Joker!

The bit with Lois and Jerry at the end was beyond absurd. -1

No comment necessary.

While I get why some thought this was a real good story, in the end it wasn't though.

For starters the whole ending thing required so much suspension of disbelief that its easier to believe SpiderMan is real.

The other issue with this story and so many others is that the wife is so over the top stupid and slutty one cant get any emotional connection with their marriage. Yes the way you and other writers do these it get the knuckle draggers riled up but anyone that requires more than a lazy "Ill get your blood boiling because shes a slut" wife it falls on its face.

What a weak man this HERO guy.

One helluva story, love it. LP

I would NEVER let the two cheaters anywhere near my daughter EVER!!!

Well done, enjoyed it completely. Definitely a twist on a standard trope 5*

The last para fucked it up for me!!! She may hve been a shitty mom…that’s not in her hands …but a marriage based on deceit ? A fuck with ex hubby a day before marriage? Keeping the husband in the dark for so long….no way no how would I ever even allow the two shitholes ( Lois and Jerry) to even be around the kids !!!

WOW!!!!

Why would Brian have anything to do with Lois? She betrayed him and Betty and now she wants to be an aunt? MO!!! Lois can not be trusted and Jerry should be kept away from this new family.

-

Otherwise an enjoyable story.

-

Pasqual

Nope. Jerry would have gotten a great ass kicking at some point

Wow, what a twisted tale of deceit, lies and coverups. Brian go screwed over big time but in the end he got Christine and his Betty back as his daughter.

You've got to be kidding. Aside from Christine, who is an angel on earth, the kids (who are blameless) and his parents who are borderline saints, everyone else is shit. He is a spineless ass, his former wife who is super-slut, and Ferrari boy who is a fuck head, no one else is worth a shit. Even the hospital administrator, who should have had his ass sued all the way to next week. EVEN The Bear is better than that. My guy in "You're Under Arrest" Had more balls than this ,and he got snookered for 17 years. The Bear does not approve. Go nuclear on them.

The BEAR

Didn't work for me.

She cucked him, deceived him, kept up with a worthless, conceited bling merchant?

She wasn't even a mother, even though she was... and left the raising of the child to the man she continually betrayed, and then you let them enjoy being in the circle of relationships that form a family?

She's a stone cold, selfish, heartless bitch, with no legal claim, even on her own daughter. She doesn't even WANT to be a mother to her own child.

She should have been left out in the cold, and the lawyer should have had an 'accident' in the latest red pimp mobile.

I get moving past things, but how do you treat someone like that woman, who has never had to face a consequence, and isn't even sorry for the devastation she wrought?

The grandparents... fine. They deserve to know their grandchild,it goes without saying. But her? Let her reap the harvest of the seeds she sowed herself. Let her grow old with all of the love and family she deserves... none.

Wow, was that weird; a really good weird though. I'd have to give it a 5 just for creativity alone. (:

The dickhead Jerry deserved a broken nose minimum. Hopefully he is cheating on Lois already and she finds out soon.

But its not my story.

Interesting story. And fascinating. Characters are just like real life jerks. And still the good guy won in the end.

I don't know how to rate this. It is well written. The characters where believable and though the situation stretched credibility, I thought the lead character whimped out at the end. He was previously likable and sympathetic. It would have been much more satisfactory if "Uncle Jerry" had become castrated in the wreck of his red car.

Very original, but the reconciliation with the adulterers was revolting and implausible.

I wouldn't let Jerry get within 50ft of the girls. For almost 6yrs Jerry & Lois cuckold Brain. Nah, they are trash and need to stay that way. Jerry earned a 'red' baseball bat haircut and scrotum message and with hopes Jerry could never perform again leave Lois forever frustrated to dildos only!

/

Other Grandparents, had a granddaughter plus one. Brain, Chris, kids and grandparents were victims made whole. From a legal point Lois was lucky she got what she got, as she was a legal nothing. But you know eventually Jackie will be told and by then we can hope Jackie will banish Lois from her life.

/

3*, Hooyah

Not too sure how good an influence their new aunt and uncle could be, considering their morals in general, but whatever floats their boat.

what is the point of making a comment when all these stories are fiction?

Constructive criticism might assist the author in making some changes in the next story and that might make them better to read. This story was relatively easy to read but the content was more than a bit unrealistic and not believable. The main male character should have been a whole lot angrier than depicted in this story and there should have been a whole lot of anger directed at the cheating bitch. It has been my experience that anything remotely like this story would have created a whole lot more anger than this tepid story displayed.

I hated the ending. The MC was such a pussy. Why in the world would you even speak to the slut, much less let her into the children's lifes? That's just asking for trouble. You could let the maternal grandparents see the children on Sundays. However, he should have told the bitch and loverboy to get back into the Ferrari and drive away. She gave up her daughter for adoption so she has no right to try to see the child. She whorred around the entire marriage. So she has no right to try to talk to the MC. He needed to tell her to fuck off and wash his hands of her. It wouldn't hurt to let everyone know just what a slut she is also. If any guy would actually do what this character did; he needs to turn in his man card, hug a tree, and then go eat a creampie.

Very well done!

Well you two cheated during the whole time but I not only forgive but welcome you both into the family. What a crock of shit.?!?!!

jtwheels

In the second to the last line of the story, Brian and Chris has twin boys. They are "Aunt" Lois' "nephews" that she stakes claim to.

Personally I would have liked to have seen Jeff and, especially, Lois to have been punished, a bit more. Not BTB, but, some kind of payback for the deception they wrought on Brian. If it had that I would have given it 5 stars instead of 4.

Still, overall, a very good read.

Cheated out of any biological children, fated to constantly see the man who. I molded him, constantly the only one in the foursome whose genetic legacy hit a dead end. The ultimate cuckold.

Bullshit! What a pussy! Why would he let "Uncle Jerry" or that cheating whore anywhere around his wife or those kids? God, what a waste of a story!

I wouldn't let the kids anywhere near "Uncle" Jerry.

Why? It was a coincidence that his new wife had adopted his old wife’s daughter. His choice was to either accept that, and be the daddy to the daughter he had reared and bonded with, and the woman he loved, or abandon a woman he loved, the daughter he feared, and Lois’s biological daughter. It wasn’t the kid’s fault!

The main character proved himself to be a real man.

The last part about Aunt Lois and Uncle Jerry seemed contrived, and, in the end, Lois’ biological daughter is going to have some serious questions.

Stupid ending to a poor story! If I could give it negative stars I would.

Agree with other why have anything to do with Chester's

Why would you ever invite the cunt Lois and the sleezebag lawyer to lunch much less even let them come close to the children? Unless you wrote this for all the cucks out there. 1 star

Great story, a great read and I enjoyed it

Great story, really enjoyed it.

Here comes Rod Serling

I read a story where a man found "his" child wasn't really "his". For some reason the biological father either couldn't be identified or he couldn't be found. He may even had been dead. The main character in the story had been the only "father" the child could identify with. He sought a divorce from his cheating wife. But the courts made him financially responsible for the child. About the same time I read that story, I heard that several states place the financial burden of raising such children not on the biological father or mother, but on the man who had "accepted" that responsibility when the child was born.. This just doesn't seem right.

if you get passed the likelihood of the coincidence and just enjoy the story and go with it, well written

The most complex story ive read here. Excellent. 5

Another gem of a story rated to low. A Rubic's cube story that is easy to follow, but has lots of twist. Quite a unique DNA genre LW's tale.

Best of all, a nice ending. *****

Good story BUT, someone should have kicked Lois's Ass, Cheating BITCH

These stories are fantastic but like others have put we need more. You are a very talented writer and I like others have put we need more stories especially from a talented writer like you. Please stop hiding your talent and show how good you really are.

Great story dont leave the true readers hanging6

Excellent story ruined in the last paragraph. Jerry invited into their lives, seriously the guy fucking his ex-wife during their entire marriage invited into the lives. Sad ending to an otherwise excellent story.

I started to read your tale and was intrigued by the plotline. I know this type of situation has arisen in "real-life", so I was curious as to where you would take it. Truthfully, I did not warm to the characters of Lois and Jerry...that's putting it mildly. My own feeling towards Lois is that if she admittedly did not see herself as a mother, why the fuck would she be any different as an "aunt" ?!!!!!! As far as the red car - addicted lawyer Jerry....meh. Both Lois and Jerry were portrayed as extremely shallow individuals with very few redeeming qualities. The "reconciliation" at the end was so false and schmaltzy, I thought It was taken from the Disney channel!

Lois would be lucky to get a Christmas card from Betty each year. Why expose kids to two horrible people like them.

your whore wife cheats through out your marriage. Has no remorse and after everything you divorce her and find it easy as fuck to raise her kid with the guy she cheated on you with.

This wasn’t a BTB, but somehow seemed to be how real life should be if the adults had the kids interests at heart...I think anyway

But Jerry?

Jerry'd be buried.

5*

With what she did. Why does the woman cheater seem to get away scot free for most of these stories.

All pretty civil considering.

Other mom's last comment as she left was "We really hope to see you and the girls again, Chris. Please?"

Chris nodded. "I'm sure that can be arranged."

---------------------------

Of course Lois wont be part of that arrangement, she cheated on me hundreds of time before and during our marriage and she legally abandoned both her daughters

If I ever see her within 100 yards of either of MY daughters you will never see them again

Are we clear?

Jackie, when old enough, finds out who her mother is and then has nothing to do with her.

Aunt Lois? No, she can be Ant Lois so Brian can step on her once and for all.

fuck lois and fuck jerry

Lois' parents sure, they werent cheating fuck sluts who abandoned their children the moment things got tough

Lois should have been made to pay. What a slut. She screws three different men just before her wedding and gets off scot free. To make it worse she gets to be "Aunt Lois" later. I would have backed the car over here a few times. Then throw her off a cliff. What a skank

I don’t think I could be civil to either of these horrible people. She used him for her own ends without any concern about his feelings or well being. If the girl hadn’t been injured how long would she have continued with her deception or would it have taken to seek divorce, if ever?

It all ends too easily for me. I think he would want closure not being reminded every day how the bitch treated him.

I think an epilogue where Jerry has a crash and is left impotent and in a wheelchair would be good to see how the bitch deals with that.

If anything deserves a "Fag Cuck Shit", tag, this one does.

I know a woman who has three children by her husband's three brothers. And four brothers who have had sex with each of their brother's wives. The women have several children in total, but only one was actually a product of husband and wife. And I know a woman who has children by a father and son. And she had married first the son, then his father and back to the son. And I know a man who is raising his cousin's son. If these relationships can work, surely the one described here can work.

...screw uncle Jerry and the Lamborghini he rode in on.

Screwed ending

"Uncle Jerry"? Nope, you can fuck right off with that shit.

Not realistic ending.

No way would be ever be around his ex again and definitely never jerry.

Expose your kids to cheating lying people with no morales..

Nope.

I usually enjoy your work, but not this time. Pretty fanciful story in all respects, but the ending goes beyond fairytale. No way you have cordial relationship with cheating wife and.her lover. No way!

I really liked the story, concept and content. I was however disappointed by the ending. I feel like Lois and Jerry should have paid a much higher price for their dishonesty.

Although an interesting read, I could not accept the action od the characters esp the ending.

I read this a second time to see if it was as bad as it was the first time......worse.

And I enjoyed most of it. Right up until the ending. No way in hell should Lois and Jerry be allowed to be near either one of those kids. Brian needed to nut up and make sure that they aren’t. Not buddy up with the two idiots.

i m glad that the little girl got her daddy back she didn t deserve all the shit thrown her way

once again a cheater prospers and i hate when they do so you get 1 tiny little star

The story is a bit of a roller coaster. For Brian Jerry and Lois you take turns feeling sympathy and contempt for all three. Brian spends most of the story acting like a hurt Schoolboy and is selfish enough himself that he can't say goodbye to the little girl who knows him as her daddy. Lois's actions speak for themselves, and she at least thinks of her birth daughter's well-being before her own. Indeed she would not have been a good mother. At the end of the second page I did not know how to feel about the story but by the end of it I thought it was exceptionally well brought together. Kudos

It's hard to feel sympathy for the husband.

Brian knew Lois was a slut when he was dating her... he caught her with someone else and she admitted to fucking the other guy. Did he really expect her to stay faithful when she got married? The dumbass should have walked and never looked back.

But he didn't...

So she got herself knocked up by some random nameless cowboy (classy!), duping Brian into raising another man's bastard. Then she cheated on Brian constantly throughout his entire marriage.

After betrayal heaped on betrayal, there is NO WAY, he would ever speak to her again, aside from profanity laden tirades. However, we're supposed to believe that he forgives her and even lets her be a prominent part in his kids lives? Come on... no one is that forgiving! Even Jesus would have told the bitch to go fuck herself.

The hospital basically committed kidnapping. Their setting themselves up as the arbiter of the situation was insane, and would have ended with them being sued for millions of dollars for that, on top of the lawsuit over the baby-switching. No sane hospital would ever do that; they'd simply sit back, tell the parties involved to fight it out in family court, and until then, whoever's on the birth certificate is the presumptive legal parent.

The idea that Lois' real daughter would have been taken away from her parents and put up for adoption (but, hey, at least her parents had the inside track on that!) is just mind-numbingly moronic.

Here's how it would have played out:

* Betty would have gone home with Lois and Brian

* The hospital would have been sued over the baby switch, with a good chance of the switched kids splitting a million or so dollars

* Lois could have sued for custody of Jackie, but wouldn't, so nothing would have changed for Jackie

* Chris and her husband could have sued for custody of Betty. If Brian and Lois were staying together, it's pretty unlikely they would win (but might get visitation), because of a strong presumption against disrupting a child's life like that. However, since Brian and Lois were divorcing, it would have been a free-for-all for custody between whoever out of Brian, Lois and Chris&Jack wanted her, and really anyone's ballgame.

The middle section, where the exposition fairies spell out everything Brian needs to know, was incredibly blatant and bad writing.

The ending, where Lois and Jerry are loving aunt and uncle to the kids is nonsensical. I have trouble grasping the degree of ballessness necessary for that outcome. I've never really understood the "This person is a sack of shit with a moral code I find repugnant. I definitely want them to be involved in raising my children!" mindset.

Well played, plenty of plot twists, and couldn’t see most of them coming. The unknown sperm donor? No way to see that coming. When Chris finally said she had kids, it gave away that Brian would see Betty soon... but sometimes you can’t hide the plot twists. I just think Brian was too forgiving to Lois, too soon. Keeping the girls away would have been cruel to Betty, But still, Brian should not have had to endure Jerry’s presence at all.

What happened? No legal action against the Hospital (I might have missed it! ..but don't kick this dog..I Bite!? Ha ha ha) Oh back to the story!...You Betchem I thoroughly enjoyed the Story ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ WOOF!

Jerry Springer, Oprah Winfrey, Ellen Degeneres. Would have loved to have this on their Show! Ellen & Oprah would have given them a car & house "You Gotta love those Two Ladies"! See Ya