Wedding Crashers Pt. 09

"Looking to invest?"

"Sort of, looking for a new home."

"Why?" Mel had dropped her egg flip on the floor and seemed genuinely shocked by my statement.

"It's time I suppose. I mean you and CC, you know, you probably want a bit of privacy."

"We need to talk." Mel replied then she turned off the gas and sat down opposite me. "Firstly, yep, me and CC are going great. I really like her a lot and it seems to be mutual. There's just a couple of problems. Firstly there's that weird connection you two have."

"That's why I thought I should get out of here." I interrupted.

"That's the last thing you should do. You're like the ying to her yang. You balance each other. You're both better people when the other one is around."

"That's ridiculous mumbo jumbo. And how is it going to help the two of you if I'm still hanging around?"

"Glad you asked Nathan. You see, I'm bi. That is I'm bisexual. I love everything that CC brings to the bedroom but sometimes there is no substitute for a real cock."

"Whoa up there girl." I'd cautioned her. "Do you know my history? I'm not getting involved in any shady, behind the partners back relationships. I've been burnt by that before."

"CC knows what I want."

"Yeah well, until I hear that from her it's not going to happen. And even if she says it's okay I'm not sure I want to get in the middle of what ever this would be."

My response didn't go down well. Mel had stormed out like a petulant child. When CC got back that afternoon she came into my room. The discussion that followed is blurry now. The result a lot clearer. We all went out to the pub for dinner that night and afterwards Mel was in my bed. We hit it off as well in the sack as we had that first morning over breakfast. She was a generous and exuberant lover. So our unconventional relationship evolved. CC and I stayed in seperate rooms and Mel moved between the two as her desires demanded. Despite her constant urging the three of us getting together was a rare occurrence.

Just when we'd worked through the dynamics of this new relationship the spectre of a baby came up. As I had been at the beginning of our unconventional relationship I was reluctant. However the ladies were persistent. So now our recent downtime was spent turning a spare bedroom into a nursery. Mel was due in four weeks. I was one part excited, two parts scared shitless.

The truckie gave me the thumbs up as I cleared the side of his truck. I rolled back inside, putting the crate down next to it's companions. After rechecking the crate numbers against the invoice I went back outside to finish the paperwork so the driver could get back on the road. As I pulled down the roller door CC came back into the workshop.

"I'll lock up, it's your turn," she said jerking her thumb towards the front offices.

"Who is it?"

"You'll see." CC brushed past trying to appear nonchalant.

"Hey," I stopped her and turned her so I could see her face properly. "Are you okay? You look upset."

"Yeah, I'll be fine. Just go, it's you she wants to talk to."

"Who?"

"Just go." CC pulled away from me

In the showroom two teenage boys sat astride seperate four wheelers. Mel was with them chatting and laughing as was her way with strangers. As I walked towards my office I could see an older lady sitting with her back to me. She had a brightly coloured headscarf covering her head and looked frail. I should have guessed but it wasn't until I was sitting down facing her that I recognised who it was.

"Eleanor?"

"I haven't changed that much have I?"

The voice was the same but everything else was a shock. Her face was gaunt, sunken eyes made more stark by the lack of eyebrows. The top she was wearing hung on her like she was a coat hanger.

"What is going on with you?"

"Breast cancer, stage 4." I sensed she was watching me intently searching for some sympathy. "I guess karma is catching up with me."

"Yeah I guess it is." Empathy was sadly lacking from my reply. "Is there a stage 5?"

"Yes, when they lower me in the ground."

I've never been comfortable around really sick people. I let my focus drift to the window behind her head.

"Is that my sons out there?"

"Yes," she smiled and some of the old Elle sparkle appeared. "They've grown up so fast."

"I wouldn't know, I wasn't allowed to see them."

Eleanor sighed and lifted her hand up. She moved her thumb across the tips of the two closest fingers.

"Do you know what this is?"

"Enlighten me."

"The world's smallest violin." I rolled my eyes. "Seriously Nathan, just extract your head from your own arse for a second and get over yourself." Her voice cracked as she showed she still had some fight left. "I'm going to be lucky to see another year and those boys are going to need their father."

"Oh fuck off Eleanor."

"What did you say?"

"I said fuck off. Don't come here with some supposedly noble gesture when you've maliciously kept me out of their lives for twelve years."

"It's thirteen actually."

"Well how would I know? I don't even know what day their birthday's are."

"I just thought you might have been more excited about this. After all it's what you said you wanted."

"This has got nothing to do with what I wanted. It about what you want. Just like Jim conveniently dying without ever knowing his wife had an Anglo kid inside her. How do you think he would have taken that when he got out?"

Ellle stood up abruptly.

"Well I've obviously wasted my time coming down here."

"You've wasted your time?" I exploded. "You took five years of my life. You took the skin off CC's back. Do you know she still has nightmares and flashbacks about that?"

"I didn't know about that until after. I would have stopped it."

"Just another unintended consequence of your little power games." I said quietly my anger doused as quickly as it had flared.

Eleanor sat back down again.

"We all had our part. It's probably not much comfort to you now but I am sorry. The boys are my priority now. Are they going to be yours?"

"I don't know them."

"We have time to remedy that."

"Do they know who I am?"

She shifted uncomfortably in her chair. "Not yet. They think we are visiting CC, they like her."

I did suspect CC had stayed in touch with Eleanor. It sounded like it was more substantial than that.

"And by visiting you mean?"

"I thought they could stay for the weekend. See how it goes. Ease them into to it so when the time comes..." Elle paused and swallowed. Perhaps from emotion or maybe just for empathetic effect. "It won't be as much of a shock."

"A seamless transition?"

"Exactly."

"And when do they find out I'm their father?"

"When the time is right."

"Which you choose?"

"Yes, of course. I mean it won't be like they are living with you twenty four seven after anyway. They've just started boarding at The Kings School so there's only holidays to worry about."

"Kings? Jesus, what about the fees?"

"All paid in advance, right up to year 12. There's also a trust fund to cover ancillary expenses and University."

The old Eleanor was back. Scheming, controlling like a grand master at the chess board.

"No," I said firmly. "They find out today. Either from you or I tell them when you are gone."

"Oh don't be ridiculous."

"That's the deal. They need to know. So are you going to do it or will I?"

Eleanor huffed as she gave me a filthy look before acquiescing.

"Alright, but I'm doing it."

"One more thing."

"What?"

"My ex. If she finds out there's money to be had she might try to take Simon."

"I can assure you that won't happen."

"How can you control that when you're gone?"

"Your ex wife's main source of income currently is an Only Fans page where fans pay to fuck her and she films it so it can be posted pay for view on her site. The last time I looked she was taking on four guys at once. Do you think a judge would have give her custody of an impressionable adolescent male?"

"Yeah... okay." Even though I hated Claire it still tugged at me inside to hear how far she'd fallen.

"Add on to that she's probably still a regular drug user and she wouldn't have a snowballs chance in hell of convincing a judge of anything."

"Alright, alright I'm convinced."

"Good, not that your current relationship status is, er, orthodox but..." Eleanor shrugged and stood up. "I'll take the boys down to the beach and tell them there. If they want to come back we'll come back."

I wasn't sure if she was having one last try to get me to change my position or she was just being a bitch. Staying neutral I watched her go. She got the boys off the bikes they were pretending to ride and corralled them out the door. Both CC and Mel shot me 'please explain' looks so I went out to where they were.

"What the fuck Nathan?" CC started at me.

"They'll be back." I assured them both.

"What did you say?" Mel joined in the inquisition.

"I'm not starting the relationship with a lie. I wanted her to tell them I'm their dad."

"You didn't think it might have been better to get to know them a bit first?" CC continued the full court press. "Their mum is slowly withering away in front of them and you want to add to the stress?"

"Better now than just after they've lowered Elle into a grave." I shot back.

"Stop it you two!" Mel got in between us. "Get the bikes inside so we can lock up. I'll go and book a table for six for lunch at the pub."

"Don't you mean five?" I queried.

"No she means six," CC butted in. "If you can have an ultimatum so can we. Elle comes to lunch."

I shrugged and started pushing the bikes into the shop. Thirty minute elapsed and there was no sign of Eleanor. I was getting icy stares from both CC and Mel. The shop was all locked up and we were waiting just inside the main glass doors watching the street.

"Maybe we should message Elle and tell her to meet us at the pub." I suggested.

"Who says she's coming back? She's fucking dying you know? How heartless..."

Mel cut short CC again.

"Settle down you two. They are coming down the road now."

Eleanor parked beside my truck and they all got out. We went out to meet them. Mel took charge of the situation.

"Eleanor, why don't you come with CC and me. We'll go to the pub and get a table. The men can go together. I think they might need to talk."

I'm not sure if Eleanor thought it was a good suggestion or she just saw the fear writ large on my face but she agreed with obvious delight.

"That's a grand idea." She said.

The ladies left quickly leaving me with my two teenagers sons. Simon and Eli looked just as thrilled as me. They didn't say anything, just continued inspecting the pavement for imperfections.

"How about we go inside." I pointed to the shop doors.

They shrugged and walked inside. I followed trying desperately to think of something to say. They took up positions sitting on a couple of four wheelers. I stood in front of them and coughed to clear my throat.

"Right, well, um I guess this day has probably been a bit of a shock." They didn't respond in any way so I started to babble. "You know, the whole dad thing, I mean, yeah you know, it was quite a shock to me when I found out..."

I looked vainly hoping for some response. Eventually Simon replied.

"Yeah, whatever."

I was at a loss. I had about as much in common with these two as billionaire does with a beggar. The only similarity was none of us wanted to be here. I was about to give up and suggest we join the others when Eli spoke.

"It was pretty fucked, what you did."

It wasn't nice but it was a start.

"I didn't even know until you were six or seven years old."

"I'm not talking about that. I mean what you made my mum do just now." Emotion came to his face and he paused to control it. "She's been fighting this cancer thing really hard. Telling us she's okay, she's going to make it. Today she more or less said it was over. That's fucking harsh man."

It was my turn to shrug.

"I thought it was important for you to know. If we are going to make this work then we shouldn't start with lies."

"Bullshit!" Simon chimed in. "You've known for six years and now you suddenly care about us? The only reason we are staying here today is because of CC."

"I tried..." I corrected myself. "I wanted to try when I first found out but Elle made it pretty clear it wasn't going to happen."

"And you just walked away." Eli shot back.

"Do you know anyone who has gone against your mother and won?"

The boys glanced at each other and there was a hint of a smile. I thought it was time for a tactical withdrawal to the pub to let the dust settle.

"Okay, I think it's time we joined the others. No doubt you guys are going to have more questions and I'll do my best to answer them. Some stuff probably should stay in the past." I found myself getting emotional. "I know I've made some dud choices previously but there's not much point in dwelling on them. Just know that now Elle is letting me have this chance to get to know you I don't want to waste it."

If I was hoping for a Disney type family huddle and reconciliation then it seemed like I was going to have to wait. They both stared at me blankly giving no clue as to what was going on inside.

"Let's go."

I pointed to the door and they scooted out to the truck like a couple of errant schoolboys let out of detention early. There was precious little conversation on the way. My questions were met with a seemingly random replies yeah, na, or don't know. It was a relief when we got to the pub so Mel and CC took over. I went to the bar and got a beer. When I got back Eleanor was watching CC, Mel and my sons in the games area playing table tennis. As I sat down she turned back towards me.

"So how did it go?"

"Frankly Elle I have no fucking idea."

Eleanor laughed out loud. Her head scarf shifted so the bare scalp was exposed. As she sort to contain her mirth she readjusted her head covering.

"You best get used to that Nathan, it's called being a parent."

"Yeah," I took a sip of my drink. "It might have been easier if I'd been able to see them before this."

"Oh Nathan," Eleanor surprised me with both the light tone of her reply and by reaching out her hand and placing it over mine. "If I could go back in time I would do things differently. What's that old saying, hindsight is twenty/twenty. Don't you regret some of your decisions?"

"Yes but..."

"No buts, there's nothing that can change what's happened. All we can do is move forward as best we can."

She took her hand back and looked back over her shoulder towards the games area.

"What did you tell them?"

"What you wanted. That you were their father."

"I mean, what did you say about the detail. Um, the how and the why."

Eleanor looked back at me aghast.

"Why the fuck would I bring that up?"

"I thought they'd want to know how their birthdays are so close but they have the same father with different mothers."

"They did but I'm not going to tell them what a flake you were."

"Um I wouldn't have put it that way but whatever I guess. So what did you tell them?"

Eleanor chuckled to herself.

"I said I suspected Jim was cheating on me just prior to his arrest and I seduced you at a party to get back at him. Regretted it after of course but ended up pregnant."

"They say the best lies have an element of truth. Did they buy it?"

"No idea," Eleanor lifted her hands up to indicate the same. "They know how sick I am, they weren't going to give me the third degree."

"Yeah, they saved that for me."

We were both quiet for a bit. I was watching how at ease the boys were with Mel and CC. It contrasted with the indifference I'd sensed towards me.

"I'm not sure I can do this."

"You don't have a choice Nathan you are it."

"What about your other kids?"

"No. I fucked the first time, can't let that happen to these two."

"What do you mean?"

"Ones in the MC, my daughter is married to a guy in the MC, another son is overseas and if he comes back he'll likely be arrested..." she paused and wiped a tear away. "And my baby, he um, he, he's a junkie."

Eleanor pulled out a tissue and wiped both her eyes and her nose. I didn't know what to say to that. It was hard to feel sorry for her when her lifestyle had been funded by drugs. When she'd composed herself she continued talking.

"Eli and Simon, they're good boys. I've kept them away from that stuff. I'm not religious or anything, I don't believe in an afterlife, when you're dead you're dead. But you do live on through your kids and I've fucked up the first four."

"That's being a bit harsh on yourself."

"Maybe, it's just the lifestyle they are living. The crime, violence, drugs... it only leads one way. These two are my chance to leave something better."

"I'm just not sure you should be entrusting them to me. I have no idea..."

"It's not just you." Eleanor cut in. "There's CC and Mel. I will admit I was having second thoughts about this when CC explained your current living arrangements but after meeting Mel I think she might have more nous about dealing with teenage boys than either you or CC."

We were both distracted by whoops of celebration and looked across to see CC and Mel high fiving each other while they sledged their vanquished opponents. It continued as they made their way back to the table, even as the plates of food were placed in front of us.

"How does it feel being beaten by two girls?" Mel goaded the boys.

"It's only a stupid old peoples game." Simon complained.

"Losers, losers," CC chimed in holding her thumb and forefinger in an L shape against her forehead.

"We could kick your butts in Call of Duty." Eli shot back.

"In your dreams buddy." Mel replied.

"You probably don't even know what it is."

"There's an XBox Series X waiting for you to find out at our house but Mel and me get the gamer chairs." CC kept the banter going.

They kept firing back and forth as we ate our lunch. I sat back as a spectator most of the time. When Mel got up to go to the toilet, CC and Eleanor went with her. I was alone with my sons again. Eli shifted in his seat then lent forward and spoke softly.

"So what's the deal?"

I raised an eyebrow unsure what he was talking about.

"With you, CC and Mel. Are you married to one of them?"

"No, and er, it's, look it's complicated."

"But you're with both of them?" Simon joined in.

"Yes."

"That's like, wild, er what are we supposed to call you? Nathan?"

"Nathan's fine." I spotted the ladies coming back to the table. "And the situation at home, it just happened in an organic sort of way. It's not a sleazy pornhub video, so keep it respectful alright?"

"Yeah, yeah," they both sat back nodding.

"What have you three been planning?" Mel asked while wagging her finger.

"I was just passing on some table tennis tips," I offered.

"Looking for a rematch are they?" Mel eyed the teenagers with mock disdain.

"Yeah, righto." Simon replied. "As long as you think you can?" He nodded towards the prominent bump of her pregnant belly.

"I could be in full labour and I'd still kick both your butts."

The competitive talk started up again until Eleanor intervened.

"I'd better be getting back to Sydney so I'll say my goodbyes before you start."

She stood up and gave both the boys a hug and final instructions on the expected behaviour. CC offered to drive her back to her car but she declined.

"You stay here and have your rematch. Nathan can drive me."

It seemed Eleanor had a few more instructions for me. When we got to her car at the bike shop she handed over a list she'd compiled of known allergies, favourite foods and her local doctors after hours number.

"We do have doctors here Elle."

"Yes but if you need their medical history, if there's an emergency..." I could see she was fighting back tears.