We're a Wonderful Wife Ch. 09

We're a Wonderful Wife

Chapter 9

Lanh's Angels

Lanh blossomed in her position of Speech Pathologist at the Northern Colorado Children's Hospital, and she absolutely loved teaching at the University of Northern Colorado. For his part, Don wasn't wild about the place, but he could make do, and after a full year it was starting to feel like a home. But he missed his barn, he missed the tractor shed where he could putter and fix things. He missed the pond and the woods, and just getting on the tractor and tilling the land. He even missed those smelly old cows. They travelled back to Minnesota whenever possible, and the house here in Greeley was always full of visitors from home, Kim-ly practically lived with them, but it just wasn't the same.

But there was a smile on Lanh's face when she came home from work, a smile Don hadn't seen for a very long time. It was the smile she wore when his high school GPA rose, and he made the honor roll because of her help. It was the same smile she wore when she saw him in his dress blues for the first time. It was the same smile she wore when she drove the tractor, or milked the cows, or took Marissa (the goat) for a walk on a leash. It was Don's job to keep that smile coming and now he knows exactly how she felt as he dragged her around the world while he was in the USAF.

To keep that smile coming he became Mr. Handyman and learned to fix and upgrade things around the house. He replaced the broken garbage disposal. He removed a cracked toilet in a small bathroom off the kitchen, retiled the bathroom floor, painted the room then installed a new toilet, and he did it all in the week she was down in Colorado Springs for a conference. When she got back and saw his work, that smile shown brighter than daylight, he was just as overjoyed that he found a hardware store that understood his inability to drive and delivered anything he needed.

It's summer, so he's concentrating on the outside of the house, things like installing hooks to make putting up Christmas lights easier and trying to simulate the Victorian charm of his dad's farmhouse without having a porch. To that end he put a patio out front and installed hanging flowerpots full of flowers and colorful dangling vines.

Today it's the rose garden that borders the front lawns between their house and the house next door that is his focus. As he was weeding, he noticed a car pull up to the house next door and a tall blond woman stepped out; for some reason the woman looked familiar to Don. "Probably another realtor," he thought. She was tall, well over six feet tall, and her shoulder length hair was a brilliant platinum blond, and the most striking thing was her large breasts. Don never considered himself a "breast man," but he did feel the urge to get a closer look. As she unlocked the house door a brand-new pickup truck pulled up, it was jacked up with chrome wheels and it radiated loud thumping music. Don went back to weeding and trimming and had the garden looking like he wanted it to look when a big truck arrived and began off-loading furniture and boxes. "Might as well see what's going on," he said to himself, and he brushed off his hands and strolled over to the new neighbor's house.

That night Don made taco salad for dinner, as he and Lanh munched she talked about work, in the summer she worked full time at the hospital and was loving it. There's something about working with children that have similar speech impediments to hers that made her feel like she was part of a community. "What did you do today?" she finally asked.

"Weeded the roses, trimmed back that hedge next to the garage..."

"You're moving a bit slow today, did you overdo?"

"A bit, we have new neighbors next door and I helped them unload a few boxes."

Lanh looked at him completly stunned. In her world that's the lead story, not weeding the garden. "Did you meet them? What are they like?"

"I met him," Don didn't look happy about it. "Kind of a greasy character, his name is Jayce. His wife or girlfriend or whatever was working."

"Did you get her name?" said Lanh as she left her salad half-finished and dashed to the kitchen.

"Carol, I think. Yeah, Carol, because he said to never call her Christmas Carol, she hates that..." Don heard the clattering of pans and mixing bowls in the kitchen. He leaned over to see what the clatter was all about. "What are you doing?" he asked.

"I'm making brownies," said Lanh as she started to craft her treat. She had the batter mixed and in the pan by the time the oven was up to temperature. She slid the pan into the oven and returned to the dining room and returned to eating. "Hopefully she'll be home tonight."

A few hours later they went over to the house and found that Carole wasn't home, she was working a double, but tomorrow is Saturday and she'll be home all day. They made small talk on the porch with Jayce, and learned nothing about their new neighbors, but Lanh did get a chance to crane her neck in and look around a little. Jayce made it clear that he wasn't feeling sociable, so they said their goodbyes and Jayce disappeared into the house with the brownies. As Don and Lanh walked back to their house Lanh agreed, "When you said he was greasy, I thought you were exaggerating. All he's done is set up the recliner and the TV."

"I set up the recliner and the TV," growled Don.

"All he's opened is a case of beer!" she said, her hands flailing about.

"Didn't even offer me one," muttered Don.

"That poor woman..."

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The next morning Don slept in a little bit, when he finally got up, Lanh was nowhere to be found; she usually sleeps in on Saturdays. He looked around the house and she was nowhere in the house. He found Lanh out front, kneeling on the lawn, her face glowing in joy. "What is going on?" he asked.

"I saw my angel... right over there," said Lanh, pointing at the new neighbor's house with a shaking hand. For years Lanh mentioned seeing an angel and sometimes two angels. She's never got a clear view of their faces, but she knew they were tall, platinum blond, and had breasts to die for. They were her angels and she couldn't be dissuaded that they didn't exist.

"You sure? The purple one?" Don asked. Lanh had told Don several times that one of her angels had purple hair tips. Don was sure he saw a platinum blond in Saudi Arabia through the cloud of Purple K fire extinguishing agent, but everything was purple (and red as his left eye filled with blood)... there were those two blonds on the morning of their wedding, he saw them far off in the distance... he was standing next to the pond, they were on the other side near their camp site...

"No, this is the other one," she said, out of breath, as Don helped her to her feet.

"What are you doing sitting out here?"

Lanh looked embarrassed. "I was going to go over to say hi and I saw the angel on the porch, and I started to get all dizzy and..." Lanh looks so cute when she gets embarrassed... "I almost fainted."

"Hmmm, you never faint when you see me," said Don as they headed across the lawn to the new neighbor's house.

"'Course not," she smiled, "I get horny."

"Good save," grinned Don.

"Gotta keep my hubby happy!" By that time, they had reached the neighbor's house and were on the porch standing at the front door when Don leaned in and rang the doorbell. They heard movement behind the door and finally it opened.

There stood a tall, curvaceous woman with platinum blond hair dressed all in white. "How y'all doin'?" she asked.

Lanh was eye level with those large, round, heavy breasts, hard nipples were pointed right at Lanh. Lanh's head tilted back, and she saw those waves of platinum blond hair and Lanh's eyes shot open, wide as dinner plates. "It's her!" she squeaked then her eyes rolled back in her head, and she slumped to the ground.

"What the fuck....?" The tall blond was shocked and quickly tried to help Don with his collapsed wife. While Don tried to ease Lanh down to the porch, the blond just said, "Let me," and scooped Lanh up like she was a little doll and carried her into the house. She laid Lanh on the couch then knelt beside her and started to take Lanh's pulse. At the same time she said to Don, "Ha, I'm Karole, Karole Krigbaum," and held out her free hand.

Don shook her hand, "Don... Don and Lanh Campbell, we live next door and came over to say hi."

"Does this happen often?" asked Karole, her southern accent as thick as the gravy on your biscuit.

"Not that I've ever seen, but this is the second time it's happened today."

"Is she pregnant?" Karole searched through a couple of boxes and came up with couch pillows that she put under Lanh's feet.

"No," said Don sadly. "There's no chance for that." It still hurts after all these years.

"Shame, we coulda been prego buddies," the blond patted her flat tummy.

"You're expecting?" Don asked.

"Just found out this morning. I should have told Jayce first, but he disappeared last night..."

Lanh's eyes fluttered open. "Angels can't have babies." She looked up at Karole confused.

"Heya little buddy," said Karole, she put her hand on Lanh's cheek. "Ya kinda scared us."

Lanh became apologetic, "I'm sorry, you look like someone I met a long time ago, it took me by surprise." It was the first thing that came to mind and the only thing that would sound plausible.

"Who? Who did you meet honey?" Karole helped Lanh sit up slowly. "Ain't no one look like me, 'cept me, Ah wanna send 'em a sympathy card."

Finally, shaking off the shock of meeting who she thought was her angel, "I'm sorry, I thought you were someone I met years ago," Lanh came to life and suddenly she was a little fangirl and buried Karole under a barrage of machine gun fast questions. "Welcome to the neighborhood, where did you come from? Where did you get such a cool accent? When are you due? Do you like making lefsa? Did you like the brownies? I made one side with nuts and one side without just in case, some people don't like nuts, OH NO I hope you're not allergic!" Then she squealed and threw her arms around Karole. Her sudden rush of questions and display of affection shocked both Karole and Don. He had never seen Lanh so animated in his life. She was gazing at Karole like she had just met her favorite Hollywood star.

"Hold on! Slow down honey child," said Karole, overwhelmed at Lanh's sudden outburst. As she untangled from Lanh's embrace, she started handling the questions she remembered, "Mah name is Karole Krigbaum, ah'm from Folkston Georgia, ah was born jest outside the Okefenokee Swamp. Ah may come from gator country but I'm a bulldawg through and through..." Karole paused for a reaction then tried again, "get it? Gators? Bulldawgs?" Both Lanh and Don shook their heads and Karole thought how someone could not know about the legendary rivalry between University of Florida Gators and the University of Georgia Bulldogs? Are these people even educated?

"Is that like a team?" Lanh finally asked.

"God dawg! Only the best team in the S.E.C.!" Karole was still facing blank stares. "Don'ch y'all watch college football?"

"Air Force," said Don.

Lanh nodded, still starstruck. "Falcons."

"Y'all silly. Where you from girl?"

"Minnesota," said Don filling in for Lanh who was stunned and marveled because her angel sat down on the couch next to her.

"Goll Dang, it's cold up there! How y'all stand it?"

"It gets cold here too, it was twenty below for a week in January," said Don.

"Twenty below! Awww fuck..." and she looked like she was going to start to cry.

"What's the matter?" Lanh put her arms around the weeping blond.

"Ah can't take th' cold..." she sniffed, "When ah first moved here, I didn't even have me a coat!"

"It's Denver," said Lanh, "Everybody knows..."

Karole shook her head, "Ah know, ah know, but they promised me! They said it didn't get cold 'cept up in the mountains!" She turned to Lanh and said, "Don't never trust hospital recruiters." She then looked around the house and her shoulders slumped, "Ah had a nice lil' apartment in Fort Collins for about a year, it was a long commute, but then I met Jayce an' he said, "Let's get a house!" She leaned on Lanh as they sat on the couch. "An' Jayce ain't been no help, he packed but hasn't even helped unpack; ah don't know where he's gone to." It appears that her fiancé Jayce is just as worthless as Don suspected.

Don looked on sadly as Lanh tried to comfort their new neighbor. For a guy the way to fix emotional issues like this is to do something, anything. Just get the hands moving, the mind will follow. "Let's start getting this house organized, you guys do the kitchen, I'll try to deal with these boxes out here, ok?"

"Let's do it," said Lanh and she coaxed Karole up off the couch. "Come on, let's get the kitchen set up before he decides to do it," she said as if Don wasn't in the room with them.

"Why, will he mess it up?" asked Karole.

"No, he'll do a great job... it will be perfect... FOR HIM," said Lanh as she looked over at Don, "and he won't let you forget it." They got up and headed for the kitchen, Lanh following her idol like a puppy, her eyes wide with admiration.

Don snickered and started going through the boxes, since becoming more mobile he's taken to cooking the same way he works on an airplane. Every recipe is followed to the letter, every tool has its location, and these locations are set logically according to HIS needs. Worst of all (for Lanh) Don has no problem using the upper shelves of the cabinets which put a lot of things out of Lanh's reach.

Chuckling to himself he started sorting the boxes in the living room as they were marked. With the admonition of "Don't overdo it!" from Lanh, Don began to move the boxes to their marked destinations: bedroom, living room, kitchen, garage, etc. He started with the ones marked garage, they were heavy, and they smelled bad, it was a scent he recognized. He assumed they were packed and marked by Jayce, the writing on most boxes was curly and precise, that was clearly Karole. The boxes marked garage looked like they were written by a seven-year-old with his left hand. He stacked the boxes neatly in a corner of the garage and using a blue plastic tarp he covered the boxes giving the garage a neat look. After catching his breath and straightening up the few yard tools, he returned to the house.

In the kitchen Lanh and Karole arranged, then rearranged, then rearranged all over again, and it's not like Karole has much to put in her kitchen. To Lanh's thinking she barely had enough to make a proper meal; she had two pots, two pans, one baking dish, one cookie sheet, and that was it for cookware. A place setting for four, mismatched silverware for four, and a cheap knife set. There were also some mismatched drinking glasses, coffee cups, and mixing bowls and that was it. It reminded her of the dozens of newly wed kitchens she saw in the Air Force as she helped young wives get settled into their new lives. "Ok girl, this afternoon we go to AmVets and fill out this kitchen."

"Shoot, ah can't afford no fancy kitchen store..." started Karole, but Lanh just shushed her.

"AmVets is a secondhand store, and the proceeds help veterans, we can get this kitchen up and running and get you cooking for real for under thirty bucks." Karole looked skeptical; she really didn't have much experience at cooking to begin with. Right now, her pantry is nearly empty except for some random canned goods, a few boxes of macaroni and cheese, a sack of grits and some flour and she's not quite sure what to do with the flour. Her freezer contained pizza rolls, frozen pizza, and fish sticks. "Let's get a couple of lists going..." sighed Lanh and she started three lists: Needs, Wants, and Groceries and started to fill the list with items that Karole's kitchen was lacking.

Then taking a break Lanh finally caught up with Don who was making the bed in the guest bedroom. It was really a cot but made up properly, it looked like a child's bed. "How are you doing?" she asked. He looked worn out.

"I'm fine," he said but he was lying, and she knew it. She gave him That Look, and he held out his hand. From the depths of her skirt pocket, she dug out a small device which clipped on his finger, a Pulse Oxy Meter. After a moment she looked at the numbers.

"Eighty-eight." She gave him That Look again. "Go home, put your feet up, turn on the oxygen and watch a game or something."

"Yes doctor," he said sheepishly. Good thing she didn't check him after hauling those boxes to the garage, his O2 level had to be down in the seventies, at that point he was gulping and gasping for air like a landed fish.

"Awww, ain't that cute," said Karole. She just caught the last few words of their conversation. "You got him calling you doctor. How'd you train him to do that?"

"She did it the hard way," said Don, "she got her degree."

"You're a doctor?" Karole was shocked. The vast majority of doctors that she knew seemed to be aloof to her. Lanh was anything but aloof.

"SPLD," shrugged Lanh. "Speech pathology, I teach at NCU, and I have a clinic at Children's."

"Wow, I ain't never had a doctor in my house, and here ah was thinkin' you weren't educated because you didn't know the Georgia Bulldogs."

"UNM is our recent alma mater," said Don as he made his way toward the front door. "But we never went to a game, for us it's the Falcons!" he called out as he struck a manly pose. Even though there's college and pro ball in Denver, their heart was still with the USAF Falcons. They never miss a game at the academy which is south of Denver.

"Yes sir, sergeant!" called out Karole as she gave him a left-handed salute.

"That's Doctor Sergeant to you," he said with a wink as he left his wife and Karole up to their own devices and headed back home to soak his aching back in their hot tub.

Karole looked quizzically at Lanh who nodded "He earned an Ed.D. from New Mexico..." She suddenly looked very sad. "We had counted on filling our lives with children and when that didn't happen, we kind of went overboard on college." Lanh shrugged with a nervous grin that faded, "I guess we over compensated..." She knew that was true, but this was the first time she had said it aloud, and it hurt.

"Oh honey!" gushed Karole and she wrapped her arms around Lanh. Lanh wanted to push her away but instead she found herself clinging tightly to the amazon. After Lanh sniffed back the tears, she pulled herself together and said, "Let's get back to work."

With Keith's mystery boxes out of the way it was easier to set up the house, and the mountain of boxes soon dwindled down to a select few that were going to end up at the local thrift store or landfill. Karole filled the time with chatter about her upbringing in South Georgia, moving from place to place as her mother found "benefactor" after "benefactor" to support them. "Ah was probably fourteen before I had a bed and a room to mahself," said Karole. "Before that ah was sleepin' on one couch after another." She stopped and thought for a moment, "Ah'm surprised ah stayed a virgin as long as ah did."

"I always had a sister or two in my bedroom, mostly it was Tam who raised me," said Lanh. "When she when off to college and it was Kim-ly and me." She paused and thought for a moment, "I never had a room to myself, and when Don went off to basic training I went out of my mind. Kim-ly had to move in with me."

"Ah spent mah whole lahf in Georgia until Jayce moved us here, talk about a culture shock! Folk's don' know how to say hello proper," said Karole as she loaded towels into the washing machine. "They don' say 'how ya doin' they say 'Howdy' like everyone's a cowboy. It's takin' me forever to get used to that."