All Comments on 'Westbound Pt. 03'

The fact that it was from the first word on obvious where the story was going diminished it a little bit, but I found the way how you got there quite believable and original...

Therefor... well deserved 5 stars for the part and the entire story.

I really love your storie so far and I didn't expected that turnover, well done my friend it is quiet believable . I really hope that you will continue Frankie the slave storie, what will be done to her and is she gona learn to love her collar and beg for it to stay on ? Keep the good work and thank's for sharing your incredible work .

You are doing really great with this story. I hope that you plan to continue the story.

I agree completely with the other commentators. This is an excellent story. Even though the general outcome is obvious, I still found myself empathizing with and becoming excited along with the protagonist. Please follow her through her six months of indenture.

Well, that Linda turnabout was a bit far fetched - the heir turned slave, turned prospective owner thing. Other than that, just magnificent.

Liked the many outstanding scenes done with real attention to detail, makes them come to life, well-paced, witty, entertaining and enough surprises to keep the suspense momentum going.

Agree w previous commenter, the betrayal by her media outlet was pretty obvious from the beginning. Nevertheless, the plot line worked outstandingly well.

Story arc might be finished now - or might be continued of the author has enough creative ideas and dedication to meet our new highly risen expectations.

Another natural ending point might be when slave ends her contact and meets with Linda again and decides on her future. Return to freedom and career or settle down as pet or slave or surprise us with something entirely different?

So after her employee negotiates for a large bonus and the use of an expensive outside vendor, Marla never tries to confirm the situation with the employee in question, and assumes that the frequently predatory slave business is telling the truth, while ignoring the coincidence with the recording equipment miraculously inoperative?

Also, if the contract was terminated, why did the cop show up?

I adored your previous two series, but this one runs me wrong. The antagonists plans required way too many things to go right.

I would very much like to know about Frankie's stay at the obedience school, the Venus Academy, and the resort in Taos. All of the trials and tribulations of what Frankie has to go through to survive even if she is being monitored by Theo, her work (Amy I assume), and a couple of other girls. Details of how she endures the beatings, trainings, her "duties" as an indentured woman would be much appreciated. Loved the twists and turns concerning Linda and her turning her lover's family into slaves would be a nice couple of chapters for our viewing pleasure (not for them however). I really liked the compassion and concerns of the other girls and was pleased to find out that there are time limits on how long the girls are slave or indentured. More please.

We need more about Venus Academy,....

I loved chapter 3 and how "Frankie" got flipped! I would love to see more, I love how this is going!

I loved seeing Frankie get used on the side of the road. I t seemed by the time Amy got to her she had accepted her fate, although that sort of ran counter to the anti-enslavement insurance. That seems to have been circumvented too easily. But Marla accepting her new assignment and willing to pay her through the indenture was a nice touch. She might come out of it all messed up in the head, but at least she will be fairly well of financially.. In the first chapter you mentioned "a truckload of money" for her participation. Would love more chapters or another story to follow her along....Gamblnluck

Thank you! I'm so glad you liked the whole thing.

Thanks! Much appreciated, and rest assured Frankie's story is far from done...

Thank you! The next arc is being written as we speak ;)

Good to hear from you, Carl! I was just telling someone yesterday about how much I enjoyed your slave psychology series.

And thanks, I'm very glad you enjoyed it! Frankie is my favorite character so far, so yes I'm working on the next story arc right now :) And if I might humbly suggest, I would love to read something new from you as well!

Thanks for reading, I'm happy you enjoyed it - I'm always gratified to see someone use the word "magnificent" about my stories!

Was the heiress thing a bit far-fetched? Well sure, but then again *all* of my stories are far-fetched, and often more than a little :D

I'm sorry you didn't like this story as much as my earlier ones. Can't win 'em all!

Let me address three things, though:

- The cop showing up was a red herring, purely coincidental - he saw flares and two large vehicles stopped on the side of the highway in the middle of the night, so he was just checking on them. I included him to make Frankie feel a bit cocky.

- Yes, isn't it odd that Marla, a seasoned journalism professional, would roll over that easily? Hmmm...

- Linda's original plan (she mentions it at one point) was to just drug Frankie unconscious, switch places, and use it to buy time before Frankie woke up and her escape is discovered. The alternate plan only came up during the trip, so many of the pieces were already in place. I see that I really should have made that more clear.

Thanks for your thoughtful comments, and I'm so glad you enjoyed the story! Let me just say that all of your wishes will come true...in the fullness of time :) Thanks for the suggestion about Linda's relatives - great idea, I'll be sure to include that. Finally, I have to admit that I enjoy writing about the relationships too - rest assured that we'll see them all again.

Thanks for all of your feedback, good AND bad, I actually really appreciate it! This was a complex plot, and there are parts of it that I'm proud of and parts that fell a bit flat, but the only way for me to grow as a writer is to hear from my readers about what works and what does not!

Onward,

GM

RE: Venus Academy - fear not, it's coming!

Thanks man! Fear not, more is coming!

I'm glad you liked it! This story is far from over, and we'll learn more about what's going on with Marla for sure, and how (or even IF) Frankie can withstand the mental conditioning.

Very exciting and erotic journey so far. Eagerly await the chapters that will follow!

Meet Miss Frankie Ontkean, star reporter. She's been assigned by her editor Marla to accompany a van transporting naked female slaves from HCI to auction. Persuaded to get the feel of slavery, by undressing and locking herself in a cage, the reporter learns she has been caught between the hidden agendas of her editor to get a great story up close about modern slavery and slave girl Linda whose friend Nicolaides is helping Linda regain her freedom to enforce an inheritance,

Disobedience is punished draconianly with the sting of the whip on the bare butt. "See how it feels, Frankie?" [Slave girl] Rhonda taunted me, laughing. "You wanted to know what it was like! One minute you're a professional, wearing expensive clothes and checking your phone. The next minute you're collared, cuffed, ...!"

Slaves offer no sympathy for Frankie's predicament. "That's normal," Linda said with a shrug. "Part of it is that slaves love nothing better than to see another slave be punished and humiliated. Some sort of pack mentality, I suppose. Part of it was that the girls wanted to make sure that he didn't back down, but gave you the full-on slave treatment so you had an even better understanding of what their life is like. And part of it was to make sure that it was you and not them ....."

GentlemanMariner makes an important point about placing oneself in a vulnerable position in which you must depend on the reliability and integrity of others.

Linda explains due to weaknesses in the system as long as eight slaves arrive in Albuquerque is the same number that left Houston. No one cares."It's also not difficult to alter someone's records at HCI .." she continued. "I can easily make you a slave and have you sold in ABQ, never to be seen again. And that was the initial plan... But ... once I got to know you I liked you. You're smart and honest, two things .... So I changed the plan. .."

"... Am I being made a slave?"

"You are not a slave: you have voluntarily indentured yourself for six months in order to undergo training as part of an investigative report," Linda replied.

How far can this be trusted? What choice does our reporter have?

The story started truly promising, I liked how each slave was given her own good backstory and that their personalities shown. Yet in the end, one slavegirl makes complete turnaround and doesn't bat an eyelash at ruining another human's life for no reason than her own gain, all other slaves seem fine with it and the journalist's boss actually sold her out in the first place. So basically everyone is rotten to the core, the slavegirls actually deserve all the abuse they get and for some reason the journalist actually enjoys all the abuse despite hating it in all previous cases. Sorry, but this just wasn't a good read for me at all.

Hopefully you will include a chapter or chapters on the escapades of Brooke and Kenzie. I think their stories could be really interesting due to their innocence and naivete. Just a thought or maybe wishful thinking on my part. Thank you for the great work you do.

i wonder if she really wanted to experience being a slave all along . in the documentary she really only puts up token resistance and gives in rather easily. also she get sexually aroused very much. she submits to being cuffed and collared and being slave naked with hardly any protest at all . i imagine my self in her place and lie her i feel extremely aroused, almost like a dream come true.

later on when she gets to suck off two cocks and swirl the cum around in her mouth i can imagine how it must feel and taste. (Is it really possible for cum to dry like that and form a foam like substance, sounds really sexy.I have swirled cum around in my mouth but usually it mixes with my saliva before i swallow it down and i know sometimes i can still taste it even the next day, thank goodness i simply adore the taste of cum.) i love this story keep up the good work can't wait to hear how she proceds as a naked slave girl.

I truly loved this story and would like to read more of Frankie's training and indentureship as well as to what happens to the others, esp the niave young Brooke and Kenzie. I am a bit disappointed that GentlemanMariner didn't take the opportunity to introduce a bit of femdom into the storyline prior to right at the end. Nicholades could easily have had her service the daughter that took umbrage at her father taking sloppy seconds after his useless son especially as she was in a position to wash her mouth out first. I can imagine the daughter being enthusiastic in punishing a slave girl for her poor treatment of her darling Daddy as let's face it is it not belief held by most, and even by slaves other than the individual that he slaves are rightly so as they have wronged and deserve to be so and treated as such? Is that not, other than a bit of self preservation why other slaves always seem so enthusiastic that the others should be punished. Linda touched on this with Brooke and Kenzie. It also never ceases to amaze me the naivety of the so-called powerful in a system open for abuse of process that they often willingly partake in themselves that they never believe they may fall subject to the machinations of others. I am certain that Linda not only likes Frankie but has personal designs on her and, if continued this will surely happen whether she likes it or not. Let's face it in a system riddled with corruption a little matter of her 6 month indentureship being 'voluntary' isn't going to be much of a hindrance to Linda to achieve her aim after she really breaks Frankie, moreso the machinations of others that may have designs on her as well.

Please GentlemanMariner let us read more of this journey.

That's so messed up. I can't believe she was fucked over like that and that Linda was a plant. This is the least fav of the chapters.

Don't understand why this story was ended here when it held so much promise for the future adventures of the soon-to-be trained reporter as a slave to tell her entire story in a follow on chapter or chapters? Pleas reconsider adding to this erotic tale to take it to its logical ending!

Anonymous, it wasn't ended there, it was continued elsewhere. Different sites have different rules. Literotica is very strict. "Strip*search*fantasy" without the stars, has different rules.