All Comments on 'The Azra-El Series Ch. 10'

The comment by Master13 was also me, speaking about the level of detail. This was great in that regard. Lots of titillating detail with Claudis, I've definitely noticed a big improvement.

I found the combat super cool, I laughed with glee as Blaze battled with them. Best moment: "You can harden your feathers?" Damn straight.

Given that Blaze seems to be able to: 1. Win people over to his cause with his 'unique organ'

2. Has high innate physical strength 3. Has high levels of energy manipulation 4. Has pretty damn good flying. I think a bit of restraint with abilities can start to be exercised :D

-Opinion Poll: I think a school is a perfect way to explore opinions and culture, it's a realistic way to do exposition on the world. From this chapter we've gotten a true glimpse at the ugly side of angels, seen how capable Blaze is in combat but in a safe setting, explored his ability to purify impure energy. It's really hard to say how long things should focus on the school, as I don't know what milestones you're having Blaze reach for, and therefore can't comment on the ways to reach them.

I can only assume you're going for: 1. Blaze understanding the social dynamics of the world a lot better. 2. Develop a good proficiency in combat and energy manipulation that isn't at his full potential, but begins to approach Elyssa's level.

3. Develop a group of people as allies and recurring characters.

The school is a great place to address those things, but if the setting starts to get stale, can try freshening it up with an excursion to somewhere dangerous to see the characters under pressure and in danger, see how Blaze responds, leads, or follows others ideas.

Can also have the outing targeted by political intrigue (like you've alluded to with the Malakim). It also provides a pretext for finding others in the angel society that are the polar opposites of the Malakim, some powerful angel(s) that can start teaching Blaze personally if for story pacing you need to speed up his power gain, which he could pass onto his friends and keep them relevant.

I think a place to definitely explore is the pixie culture. The reason being that Siofra displayed a different personality than most other angels I've seen. In terms of the dynamic of the angel personalities, they tend to either be innocent and the bad ones come across as naive and ignorant.

It's been my suspicion that sexually speaking, if demons become involved they'd probably have pretty dirty bedroom talk. Story wise, that might be far away, though pixies might be a breathe of fresh air in

A. World building

B. Character personality

C. Different tone to sexual encounters

OK to start I have to say my mind has been blown that was just wow I can't think of words that describe how great that story was and secondly I am sorry to say I missed your reply I had checked the day after I commented and it said there was no comment at all not even mine and finally for the otters name I was thinking a name that has to do with water because sky is a quetzel and will be in the sky so why not go based on that so maybe something like Sea, Splash, or Aqua but nevertheless it is your story and therefore your choice I am just thinking along the lines of space like where they spend their time

DankMemez: I actually received your email first, but I prefer the comments section. Easier to keep track and it allows for others to see your opinions. I will give you a proper reply in the next chapter, but you've given a few things to consider (to say the least).

ReaderFic:I like all the three names and the common theme with Sky. I will pick one depending on how Blaze/Rebecca meet the otter.

I am glad both of you loved the chapter/ fight scene enough. Your comments give me both inspiration and insight to improve my writing.

PS: Literotica screens the comments so it takes a while for them to show up. So, I will keep replying to your comments in the subsequent chapters.

Regarding the school part of the story.

https://www.strawpoll.me/16902733

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Patrons will also get to see the chapters a little early. I post them the same time, but Literotica takes a few days to publish while Patreon is instantaneous. Chapter 11 was available for patrons from the 20th. Patrons also get other minor perks. Check out my website

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Thanks for your support.

Good fight and awesome scene with claudis

Appreciate and fully understand the answer, and the content more than overshadowed any other emotions I may have had about my earlier question. Holy Righteous Fury. That concept has appealed to me time and time again, when fighting for and infused with "Truth, Justice and the American Way!" (jk) you can break normal boundaries and beat the big bad, even though they (being the big bad) are stronger than you. Lovely story element for magic-esk worlds. Also really love that even more defining moment (imo) than his Paladin moment, where after he completed his hit he wasn't still suffused with battle rage, but immediately recoiled in disgust at his own actions. Really helping to address his earlier honest question of whether he is an angel, or a demon, biologically, at least in my mind. But its always easier from the outside, than looking in at yourself.

P.S. Glad you are no longer in pain. xD Have no concerns about my reading stamina, I've read multiple books in a row before without more than fixing drinks/ sammich breaks. Loved the story, and so very happy he is able to do more good.

Poll: If you've got comfortable content for school, I for one would definitely love it. They way you've already written is great, and it does help that plausibility when we see the progression, though it doesn't need to be inch by inch, naturally. Yeah, training montage!

Btw, totally with you on the technology. Lots of people underestimate just how complicated any piece of tech really is, much less how to invent it in a new world. Because you have to invent every process necessary that allows the tech to function as well, and the ones they need, etc. etc. I know when I try to actually think about how computers really work I give myself a headache, because JUST HOW?!?!

Loved the mention of Ali and Tyson. If you don't want blood and guts I understand. But Self-righteous stuck up is as evil as evil itself. So you need to put it down in some way. Maybe verbally make them realize how wrong they truly are. Great story so far!!!.

Well, I’m surprised at some stuff but pleasantly surprised, for example I didn’t think a teacher would be fired but after the way she acted I’m glad it happened that way, and even though you are able to understand quantum mechanics (which is so cool btw) I’m pretty sure you could have blaze introduce some of the simpler technologies that earth has, such as steel working or some kind of special trick or two that while being considered simple on earth, would advance technology for the angels, ( I’m not expecting things like nukes or rockets and stuff) this would allow blaze to receive more respect from the scientific community of the angels, and to be honest I would have liked to have seen the after affects of the righteous fury and stuff, you also seemed to have glossed over the visit siofra was supposed to make or was that supposed to happen a bit later on? Other than these few suggestions I think you have done amazingly well on this story so far

Can’t wait for the next chapter

Also the fight scene was pretty good wished it had a bit more tactics used and maybe a bit longer or something but other than that amazing work

Not gonna lie I reread this chapter and I started thinking about the tech and it made me wonder if blaze understands the basic concept of guns and such tech but he also can manipulate world energy couldn't he use the energy to make his own tech like many shooting little balls of energy at an opponent but also I think the bat is really cool but think about a two handed hammer like a warhammer or something that he reinforces with energy and it has a chance to say brake that one chicks shield or something I dunno I've just been thinking about it all day, well since two this morning when I finished reading (yes I litteraly have dreams about your story I'm that immersed)

This was probably the best addition to the series aside from when Rachel was added. The new friendship with the pixie adds a new dimension to his circle of friends. I would however like to see the shoutouts limited lol

Thank you for the work you have done and for the work to come. I feel as if this series can go on for eternity, and I hope it does. Take your time, you've done great so far and I am so excited for future chapters. Take care and enjoy yourself.

-A happy fan

I was trying to make an account but I was running into problems. ANYWAYS I loved the chapter today. The double sex scenes are nice, especially the Pegasus one. Pretty interesting choice. I think the story is at a good pace and I expressed my interest on the poll that we will need more school stuff. This is going off of my experience of reading tons of books that have school arcs. 3 chapters will be TOO short unless your planning on doing a major time skip. This would take potential development for the new friendship you started in this chapter and we would be missing out on some sex scenes xD. Before anything else I have a weird question to ask. How hung is our boy, Blaze? You never explicitly stated how big his penis is and not enough description if given for our imaginations. It may sound weird, but I think it is good to give some what of a description for his penis.

I understand that you will be setting a age limit on who blaze will be having sex with. But I assume you plan on having some sex scenes with his fellow classmate that are of age. It doesn't seem right if he is banging older women or in blazes words grannies and not with people around the "younger" range like 60 to 100. You can prob guess by reading this comment that I like the sex scenes a lot.

The Fighting scenes was good, but you could have done better. My understanding is that you don't have much knowledge to work off of for martial art besides black belt. I would suggest to do some research on potentials styles of fighting to introduce in the story. If you already have a plan on how you are going to approach this then awesome! If you don't for now you could treat Blaze as a brute who only uses raw power to fight until he picks a style on his own or he gets a master.

I realize that there wasn't a post on the Reddit thread /r/noveltranslation like you did before. I would recommend to do so if you can because it is a great place to get exposure for series(this is how I found it). Another thing is I was wondering if you have a planned release date for your chapters. Like once a month or something. Having something like this will bring back readers most of the time. I know I was checking everyday for a release, but since I didn't know a estimated release time I was getting drawn away. I understand that you are treating this a hobby so I don't expect you to grind out chapters, but like a update on how you plan on releasing chapters will be good.

I am going to have to reread the Pegasus sex scene again, I was reading this chapter at 3 in the morning. If you looking for a erotic book to get ideas off of I would recommend Road to Kingdom, but its a bit extreme with how hung the MC is and the sex scenes are. I still think its a good thing to read since you haven't read much erotic books.

-dhrew

Holy shizzzz! Wish this healing sperm Blaze could start a business or a charity in some shape or form and "help" so many natives of Azra-el! The Deva of healing sperm. It has nice ring to it lol.

I loved the first real fight where it felt like the opponent was was too smart for him and Balze was way too overconfident that he would lose. I honestly wouldn't have been surprised if the bullies won and Blaze lost. There would be no coming back from such a loss so I am personally glad he not only beat Priscilla and her lackey(s), but also won himself a loyal servant!

Yes, I know he thought he didn't like it. But... He never actually denied it either! He never said outline that he refused or was against it. And latter she said she "was just following his orders" so that gives me hope that his finally and reluctantly got his first biggest fan (and disciple?)!

So let's see. What has Blaze accomplished on his not so little conquest of this school? Well, he is now the King of Class 1A. He has a throne room. A throne. He acts like a king. He is treated as a king by his "foll.. umm friends." His "subjects" out of loyalty to the alpha king, big bro, sneak into hiss throne to sleep with him without him having to order them to. He has had to work hard to earn respect even with his wings and his recommendations from the headteacher and mayor(?). This has forced him into a situation where he's unleashed his "Rhiteous fury" upon the unbelievers lol and consequently made the entire class and school look at him with some varying levels of reverence. If it wasn't certain before they then it is certain now that he has a magic dick that shoots magic sperm to heal all kinds of oddities. I can't wait for his humanitarian (angelicanitarian) effort in the war between angels and demons; especially the part he Rhiteously heals injured angels or demons lol. There's your Saint right there! Saint Blaze of the healing dick "essence." Got a nice ring to it.

Oh wait... What will happen if all pixies find out that his "Rhiteous Fury" mode is reminiscent of that of their saviour from a long time ago? Will they see him as some form of deity? And dare I say a.. Deva? :0 Holy shizzzz!

Does this mean when demons learn of Blaze's holy "essence", will they spies and/or infiltrators behind enemy lines to attempt to kidnap him?

Well, in the healing thing. I think it would be nice if you put some occasional cases like these where he has to "heal" someone, angel or not. I mean.. you've al kinda turned his dick milk into a form of Chekov's Gun so why not fire it into more unhealthy persons who're either mentally or physically unwell and justify is as an angelicanitarian (humanitarian) effort or some logical thing. Or like in the last principal encounter where they said it's "for science." You know, to keep the ball rolling. Since you've set up the precedence that Blaze is actually will get to attend to umm.. special cases of hi particular specialisation in the umm.. "medical field" of dick milk "essence therapy" on sad cases that touch him deeply on an emotional level. For science! ( ͡☉ ͜ʖ ͡☉)

"Made a bunch of foll.. umm friends." Oh wow! I am so touched that you added this! Did he mean to say "followers" if so then respects to my senpai! ( ͡☉ ͜ʖ ͡☉)

The humour in this story is a nice touch. It shows that the character are able to have fun too. Poor Alice lol. Her character description literally say she will always walk in at the wrong times (to paraphrase). And rip Carbine Momo. The REAL UNSUNG HERO of this story. Turns out carbikes have an angelic lolita complex but sonlmetimes they could actually be doing the noble thing like chasing away or fighting to the death against all potential predators, all to protect babies of any species... :'( Momo was the real unsung comedic villain and mastermind of this story lol! Rip. Type "F" to pay respects...

This is like anime. In how now I have to wait for the next part. Oh well, I will just set up my tent right here at Blaze's academy and watch him grow as the King of each year group he joins and promptly subdgigates.. ALL HAIL KING BIG BRO BLAZE! ( ͡☉ ͜ʖ ͡☉)

I'm so sorry. This was supposed to be a constructive review but this story just makes me wonna throw all logic out the window. Never read an angel Vs demons story that felt this good before. I mean... I created this account just so I could comment on this story. Isn't that proof enough of just how memorable and impactful this story is? Or rather the author who invented the systems in this world that seem to make some logical and cohesive sense? I can actually see this happening. I don't have to scratch my head in wonder at how anything is happening. It just seems to all flow. To all.. mesh! ( ͡☉ ͜ʖ ͡☉)

Keep it up! See you next time Senpai and big bro Blaze. And yes I like the fights and the school story arc would be nice if it wer extended a little. Our your King is growing up. The best part about a person is watching them grow up. They are supposed to be the moments that may define you or you can define.. I think. Anyways, I would have to find his school days rushed to the point where we don't even see him graduate. Perhaps he may even reconcile with some goes by then and make them into his new subjects...

I said bye already right? Ah heck. This story has made me high lol!

So I won't say bye anymore. Instead, I will say "until we meet again!"

Also, I hope you brought enough presents for angel Xmas, King Bing Bro Blaze!

And I hope there's a "natural" phenomenon where carbikes become Easter Bunnies!

And demons dress in Halloween costumes

A d Angela dress in skimpy Xmas costumes.

And Blaze's royal subjects at school become "Santa's little elves. Although, I see Pixies matching the elf theme perfectly!

But honestly. Just look at our human calendar. Look at the holidays. And somehow implement similar events in this story. I play many online games and they tend to do events like these too during special annual holidays too! This would fill up this world you've created. Right now in my head it feels like it's still summer. Will there be winter soon? Will it snow? Because if/when it does I wanna say:

"Winter is coming" to reference one of my favourite shows! ( ͡☉ ͜ʖ ͡☉)

Because "winter is here!" ( ͡☉ ͜ʖ ͡☉)

Id like to say im glad your recovered from your illness. I really liked this chapter, it portrayed how blaze is OP but not completely self centered. "He had to shake off an image of Muhammad Ali wearing Siofra's wings and ears." Dead honest i laughed out loud at that. But most of all, Righteous Fury. Like Damn, even the world is backing him up. Really hope he turns out to be a Deva. Speaking of Technology, i think blaze should maybe meet someone who can take his description of earth tech and make it possible with a combination of Tech and World Energy/Magic/Enchanting kind of like hybrid Tech. And For Sex scene ideas, i have a personal preferance for Footjobs/Femdom but like the femdom where she gets overpowered in the end. Just saying.

Let me start off by saying that I was hesitant to start reading this when it came out due to description and the Title. It felt like it would either disappoint me with lackluster effort or overly crass and pointless harem sex! But finally after seeing a consistent ratings, I decided to give it a try, and boy am I glad to have done so. Your first chapter was a little underwhelming but it did manage to keep me on tenterhooks! Finally after a couple of chapters you have seriously improved the story and writing style really well. In fact I was starting to get worried last chapter, especially after the Brija fight which while appropriate and tactical was a little bit underwhelming, about how you will manage the more exciting part. I can safely say that your skill in writing fight scenes are very VERY good and satisfactory! You fight between Prissy and Blaze was very vivid and just enough to make me feel the adrenaline! Stronger than others he may be but the thing that made me love this story the most is that he is Just a bit stronger than others! Not too OP and yet strong enough to win. That is the best kind of MC in my opinion and you have done it my friend!

Let's go to the reason we are on this site. Smut, erotica, sex, fucking, lemon etc., whatever you want to call it, it seems to be the most integral part of the story. Uncontrollable lust, healing sperm, harem settings, uninhibited sex all are present. I personally think the sex parts could have been done better. They were a little bland and at times just a bunch of words put together without much emotions. Don't get me wrong, there are some scenes that are well written such as the first times but more often than not, they are brushed off and not too artfully either. I believe you could have left some of them at the insinuation part instead of following through with the description as it would have had a bigger effect. Otherwise, I think you are doing an okay job with a potential to be better.

Coming to the story or plot or other similar stuff, I must say that while familiar, it is also so unique in the way it is presented. The powers, species, kingdoms, interactions and the overall dynamics are very well described all the while still leaving a healthy room for more development. The characters set in very definitely and for most part no one seems too out of place. Not much to say as we haven't really seen much but I am very intrigued and an very eager to see more of this fascinating world.

On to the Characters themselves, kudos my friend. Hats off to you! You have a lot of characters to show considering you are building a new world from the scratch(at least for me). Many writers make the mistake of trying to completely define a character with a fixed boundaries and a billion lines of description both it physical and mental. That is a bad thing as there is an information overload and makes the story dull as it takes too many lines and makes for a dull read. Plus, it constricts the readers imagination. I always believe that a good character building means defining the most characteristic feature(not always) as concisely and briefly as possible and blend it into the flow of the story. This ensures an image is formed in our minds. As we read the story, we the readers should interpret various features and add it to the image in our mind making for a more memorable read. While not fully successful, you have managed to maintain the flow of the story without having to stop for cumbersome character descriptions more times than not. One more thing that makes it for a good read it the innate conflict that you have added. Conflict an essence of life. Be it MC or the "good" guys, you put an ample amount of light and dark without blatantly taking side for most part. This makes for a very engaging read.

Overall, I am really glad to have started this series and I hope that you will continue to dazzle us with a brilliant work you have done so far. Good job mate and keep up the good work!

Personal Rating: 8.5/10

J. Jamie Dupane

I was certainly looking forward to the next chapter for a long time! I hope you are feeling better about the food poisoning now.

I really liked the character developments and the plot development. This story has a long-ass way to go and I am EXCITED!

I liked the contrast of character that Uriel had to the rest of the angels we've been introduced to so far but it also seems a little un-angelic as he's too full of contempt and self-loatihing. I mean I can see it happening but it feels so different!

As always, I can't wait for the next chapter! I hope it's a little sooner than this one and with more sex! ALWAYS MORE SEX!

Fighting okay as you do not go to extremes.

What is OP character?

I check for new chapter atleast 2 times a day.Could you make it quick plz.

Is done. Will submit after a final edit tomorrow

Really enjoyed the story probably more than the sex but I am unable to see Ch.11 as it says you uploaded it yesterday.

I've already submitted chapter 11, but it will take some time for Lit to review it and post it. It is already available on patreon.

If you want to be notified on chapter releases, follow me on twitter or on my patreon account. I will also update on reddit as soon as the chapter shows up on literotica.

https://www.patreon.com/CapDragon121

https://twitter.com/CapDragon121

https://old.reddit.com/r/noveltranslations/comments/a0lhia/en_nsfw_when_angels_cum_chapters_10/

Does it normally take this long for lit to approve stories? Seems like 11 has been pending approval for 4+ days now.

btw love the stories!

The fight scene was awesome!!!!

It adds variety to the elements of the story.

This Righteous Fury is a great setup for what Blaze's future might hold.

Maybe his name his a tribute to the phrase "Blaze of Glory".

The him joining the "mile high club" was fantastic.

What made it even better was that it was for a reason.

The fact that sex with him can heal adds a nice level of complexity to his relationships going forward. Well done!

It would be hilarious though if on one of the weekends the daughter walked in on her mother and Blaze working on her "Physical Therapy".

Talk about "AWKWARD"!!! hahaha

This may not be a long the lines of your fantasies but I think it would be nice if some of the older angels were able to get in on the "loving".

I know Blaze has explained that he feels no affinity toward the 300+ angels, as they only look to in there 30s and maybe 40s I could still see some gorgeous angels being worthy of doing the fun. Just a suggestion. Maybe some thing to think about as Blaze starts to look like a man. I wonder how the angel would will react when that happens.

*lil quirk of grin, soft chuckle*

You asked at the beginning of this chapter if you still have any female readers and, if so, what has kept our interest... While I can’t speak for other female readers, I can say that I am enjoying the world and characters you have created. You have developed a storyline that goes beyond the sex scenes... those are enjoyable *grins* ... but the story holds my interest even more so. I’m looking forward to what the future holds for Blaze, his adopted family and his friends. Plus it just makes me chuckle whenever he spots a backside he can’t help but drool over. I definitely think he is a butt man, although he does show a good deal of appreciation for a great pair of breasts. *chuckles soft* Anyhow, you definitely have at least one female reader enjoying the world of Azra-El and the angels that inhabit it..... looking forward to meeting the demons as well.

Oh.... and by the way... I think the fight scene with Priscilla was perfect! She deserved a broken jaw. *smirks*

So after reading this Q and A session I see that you have given more thought to the technology of the world you have created. I sent you something about it, technology levels, after reading the beginning chapters. I’m glad you had already thought about it. It makes perfect sense that they wouldn’t need to discover mechanical flight when they have wings. Or that they see to discover electricity since they can naturally manipulate energy and have crystals to store it in and use for multiple things. That said, I noticed something that infers a technical advancement I’m not sure that you planned. When Blaze goes to Claudis’s house there’s this:

The inside of the house contained a lot more furniture than Seshat's house. There were also two rooms, along with a kitchen and a living room. A picture of Claudis and a young angel with long whitish pink hair hung on the wall, adjacent to a brick fireplace. Gyrill stood behind them chewing on the young angel's hair. They seemed quite happy.

A PICTURE. Is that a photograph? Because that implies discovery of optics, film, maybe even pyrotechnics if it’s like 19th century photography. To avoid this unintentional problem, the picture could be a colored drawing or painting. Word choice in the story can lead to unintended consequences.

So I want to offer something to consider. I took a writing class many, many years ago. One exercise we were given was to take a picture and describe it. We then handed the description to someone else and they had to recreate the drawing. Then the original was compared with the recreation. I learned a lot from that experience. Not just in writing better, but understanding that the words that you use can be interpreted in different ways according to the reader’s understanding of them. So choose wisely what you write, it can make a story better or hurt it with misunderstandings.

I also want to talk about Q&A 6 and this point of hierarchy, “you'd usually think that a six foot five well built giant can beat up a five-foot five person. But what if its Bruce Lee?“. First, I want to an article about magic systems that might be of use to you. It is from mythcreants, a site I wholeheartedly recommend. They have many articles for writers.

https://m.mythcreants.com/blog/how-to-create-a-rational-magic-system/

Regarding the the strength and size vs talent and skill point you make, am I to infer that as Blaze continues his learning, this will be a lesson he learns? And in doing so, possibly find a mentor that can truly handle him? He has a bit of a fatal flaw in his arrogance and sometimes overconfidence and I can see him vexing his teachers. Perhaps he needs someone like Bruce Lee to reign in his flaws? Just a thought.

Thanks again for your hard work and sharing your story with us.

Sincerely and Respectfully,

Just Another F’ing Critic

The fight scene and it's consequences were great. More please!

It managed to:

Show us Blaze's fighting style

Give more character to Blaze (feelings wrt bullying)

Better define an antagonist angel/group

Introduce Righteous Fury

Give character to Siofra

I am enjoying Siofra's character. She feels more flushed out than anyone except Ely and Jie Er. Slightly disappointed she is ruled out as a love interest despite being well above legal age, physically being the size of an adult human female, and seemingly being more emotionally experienced (less naive) than most of the adult angels. It also seems like Blaze is attempting to make an emotional connection (friendship) with her instead of just being fuck buddies.

What's with all the suuppeer long comments on this series? And the series is great! See, done! XD

Loved the fight scene and righteous fury!

It's really hard to write comedy it's really hard to write drama and action let's be honest it's just really hard to write fullstop. I think people have this misconception that if writing words onto a page is writing then how hard can it be because everyone can do it?

But writing compelling characters, creating a world and exciting dialogue is just so hard to do and this author is genuinely talented 😎

Love the fight scene, was on the edge of my seat with the rightous glow!! Yelling at the teacher ! OMG