All Comments on 'Wife Burns Herself'

Love the story. Money does not buy a life. AAAAAA+++++

so, where was the revenge?

Interesting story!

5

This went to pieces when he got together with his mother in law. I really felt bile in my throat. Could have been 5 but ended as a two.

I'm afraid that I found this story unconvincing. Karen went with Jackson despite clear (and checkable) warnings. She fell under his spell very quickly and followed the path taken by (at least) two other wives. Even with her enthusiasm for money she has heard something to make her think. James's sudden relationship with his mother-in-law also seems very improbable. She had been raped and seems to have little sexual experience, certainly not recently when she was living with them. Despite that she seems to very experienced once she is in bed with James. I am also not sure why James would get such a huge pay off - Karen might be able to sue Jackson for rape (or similar) and but as she "went along with everything" this legal action might not go very far. The 50 men, and their partners, would have to be informed of the STDs. There are some good passages of writing here but the overall plot doesn't seem to add up. Thank you, nevertheless, for posting it - don't stop writing, just tighten your plotlines.

I don't know what to think of this story... I do know I feel a bit disgusted especially what Annabelle said at the end ..

/

I think I disliked the story.

WTF?

I wasn't sure if I was going to enjoy reading this one. Most of your other stories/series just were not my cup of tea. I did not rate them because I consider rating stories ⭐ or ⭐⭐ when they are decently written and have a good story line that doesn't agree with how feel. It marks them down not something I care to do.

I used to give ⭐ and ⭐⭐ but recently I have re-evaluated my opinion on giving them. I will read a story. If I feel if I truly hate it or I feel it is just not worth the time to read I will give them ⭐ or ⭐⭐.

This one on the other hand showed me, you are a writer of stories that I thought you were in my mind. This was an excellent story and earned the ⭐⭐⭐⭐ I gave it.

I see how many will comment about the gold digging side of the story and she got what she deserved. Others will complain they hate the graphic details you gave to the gold diggers in their bridal shower. While I agree with them in the first part about the gold diggers getting what they deserved. The second on the graphic details were not that detailed just enough to show the story what happened, all I can say is what is the name of this site, get over yourselves. I enjoyed the story the way it was written.

As I tell almost everyone whose story I comment on, "It is your story, you tell your tale your way."

Keep Writing

JH4Fun

So many negatives from people that have never written anything here, and neither have I but i try to be constructive and not whiney little Duche bag. You wrote well and your ideas flowed clearly. I never had to stop and figure out what you were trying to say. Don't sweat bad reviews by anyone, too many are asses. I have my personal problems with this but they are my problems that others don't seem to have, far too many details about sex, I've never been with a woman that talked as much as you seem to during sex. Some people don't mind that but its not what I'm here for. I prefer a good story to detailed sex. Thanks for a nice story.

Which was the style at the time

Story wasn't bad but the ending was rushed. Still, I could see the effort made to make a good story! so I gave it 5 stars anyway.

If Jackson is a billionaire with a penchant for unethical behavior and illegal business deals, he's going to have tens or even hundreds of millions salted away in overseas accounts that US courts can't reach. He might end up losing the majority of his wealth, but he isn't going to end up in a poorhouse. Maybe a villa in Montenegro or Vanuatu.

When 20 just isn't enough you have to go for 50, and piss and STDs. Its a great premise but This story is unintentionally funny. However,

I do appreciate the effort

4. A decent story but the ending especially the revenge was too abrupt. Barely any revenge.

Fun read but a little bit too far over the top. 4*

Was a real good story on the way to 5 stars until he got involved with the mother-in-law. That was bad. Should have brought back Ann at that point. The revenge against Jackson was way too rushed and was pretty anticlimactic. Also, the whole fact that Karen never said she loved him would certainly be an issue in any serious relationship and would have been addressed before they even got married. Either she would start saying it or she was history. Like I said, could have been a 5 but dropped down to a 2...maybe a 3 for me.

Wonderful story! Karen was a whore and went nuts, believed a professional whoremaster and bullshitter, and basically lost her life. Ellen helped James back to sanity and they fell in love. This CAN happen. Please continue the story, where Ellen becomes a bride, gets artificially inseminated and produces a beautiful baby that nurses her 38dds along with daddy. Mama is proud to feed her family, husband and child. For those that say it can't happen, have a lady 17 yrs older, kiss you and tell you she loves you and you return the statement. She goes on a coma that night and dies shortly after ...

Really rushed ending. Over the top funny spoof....the irresistable billionaire and the wife of 20 years who never told him she loved him.....you crack me up. Wish you had put a little more effort in the ending though.

Undeliverable, but an enjoyable story

Things started pretty well, but then hubby stated doing his mother-in-law. Okay, things are getting kind of shaky but we're still making headway. Then, you pulled in the daughter and the wheels fell off. Crash and burn.

Very good but felt a little rushed. The ending was too quick and short. Thanks.

Sociopaths screwing with and screwing over other sociopaths. Take it off LW and sell it to E! Entertainment (that's on oxymoron)! 4/5!!!

Good story! I hope you get to write an epilogue or even another chapter.

The surprise ending was perfect! Excellent read. 5*

Munchie184

REALLY? WTF, CINCO.

A really well told story, the only thing that bothered me was that in the final sentence the daughter demands that she also wants to be fucked. The mother-in-law is just fine, but your own daughter?! 4*!!!

38DD tits? Bet her back hurts from holding the weight.

I liked this story for one reason. After reading 100's of L/W stories, finally a writer who gives a horrid example of what a cheater will do to reach whatever goal they cheat for... The story may go to extremes in some people's view; however, I love it better than the dumbass cliche' that most cheaters expound after being caught in the act. The skank had all the evidence a "box pf rocks" needed to resist her most basic flaw. Go figure. One last comment; how could anybody do this after having a great husband and three kids? Go figure. Yea I know the story was fiction but hey they all are right?

It wasn't great to begin with, but it might have still pulled off an okay rating but then he ended up with the mother-in-law, which was just pure bullshit.

I think of colour by numbers but this was written by idiots. The entire narrative couldn't have been more ridiculous who the fuck knowingly marries some 'whore' just because she's a good fuck? She's a whore of course she's a good fuck!

And the first person narrative was so dry as to make any preceding story completely and utterly irrelevant. This was so bad as to make any actual score something like -5 out of 10

[09.09.22]

Nize und Twizted!

11/10!!!!!

This was incredibly stupid. Had I noticed Alec Baldwin as the author's icon picture first I would have known beforehand it would probably be stupid.

A story like this needs a negative star rating.

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ A complete work of fiction. Not probable as reality. A fantasy. An entertaining story. I don't understand all of the negative comments.

A fun story. Pure fiction. It could have had a much better ending.

1.The sex hook up with the mother-in-law was taudry and hurt the story.

2.You went W-A-Y overboard with sex with Grandma. That hurt the story.

3. The M.C picking up the pieces for her was simply a silly device. It hurt the story, badly.

All this is unfortunate because it started so well the you let it go off the tracts by adding the above.

Have a proof reader, preferably two-it will make you a better writer in the process-as they will quickly see issues like this.

Please keep writing but, I implore you, don't repeat these mistakes. The condemnatory comments below I believe support my critque.

Last point. IF you prefer stories like this, yet insist raming it down the LW readership then expect to get dumped. Yes, some readers are cruel but most are rather discerning and demand quantity stories.

Please read the work by Bill and Kate as well as Saddletramp; their are 10 others of that quality there as well.

Please step up your game or consider submitting your stories to some other area.

I'm not sure what I just read. Some stories here go off the rails but this one was never on them.

The story is just as worthless as the writer. It's a shame...

What is this worthless shit of a story I think the writer has knocked his brain more times than the wives have been in this story

Yeah my man this one is just silly.

The problem was the main characters were ALL so unlikable it made it impossible to like the story.

Too bad Ellen couldn't have eggs planted in her pissy. that way, he'd knock his wife up and she'd have a baby by someone who loved her. Besides that he could drink out of those 38dd baby feeders, when the baby or babies finished...

What a load of fucking rubbish about a pathetic loser written by someone obsessed with big tits

story is too improbable even for fiction marry grandma totally ridiculous, providing for the selfish bitch would never happen. put in science fiction category

Rich guy fucking and humiliating wives of men that got on their bad side is very real. Marrying the grandma is not. Good story.

"So, I fucked Karen's brains out and gave her three loads of cum in ALL her holes." - Really? What enviable Sexual prowess! Wow Takes me back fifty-odd years, all the way back to my mis-spent (or was it?) youth, way, way, back in Nineteen-hundred-and-frozen-to-death! Happy Days! .

Nowadays, even on a good day `fucking-her-brains-out, I would struggle to give her just ONE full load in each of her three holes, let alone three in each, without a break!

Great story though, well done!

R.S.

Well, it is a fantasy so not believable. Fucking the MIL was tacky however plausible. Next he wants to marry his MIL? Then the last part was his daughter was first in line to fuck him? Really?

Doing the mother in law, was just a little sick! The rest, not so believable. But in any case, I gave it 3 stars.

This was the worst most ridiculous story. Ever

How did you get stoned enough to stick your tongue down on 63 year old woman.

The author thinking it was clever added something at the end (trying to please Literotica readers?)

Previously I rated his work 5. I feel that I should rate this a 1, but that would be from my great disappointment over an absolute waste of talent. Most will rate it a 4 or 5. I will not rate it.

Ridiculous story written by someone who is obsessed with big tits

God awful writing

39G? Really? Why does everybody these days go D, DD, E, ETC? I quit reading after 38G. How the hell would she stand erect all day, or even for a couple hours? I skipped to here and gave a mercy Three Stars. JPB

This story, which I couldn't finish, was the most perverse story I ever started to read. Are there no monitors at Literotica to log each story into proper category? This batshit opus deserves a category all of its own.

Chop your hands off as penance for writing this fucking pile of shit

3 stars was being generous. Very poor storyline. Who would tell their children what this story portrays? My god, think before you write!

Not credible.

I finished the story out of morbid curiosity. Your language as a writer is stilted and clunky. All the dialogue was delivered with the grace of a ditch digger on meth. Seriously, I wanted to stop reading but I mean it was almost entertaining in the way of how stupid could you make a story if you really tried. The wife was totally brain dead even when confronted with incontrovertible evidence. The children all wanted to see graphic pics of their mother? Utter rubbish. Fifty man gangbang? All peeing in her mouth? Unfuckingbelievable! Holy jesus on a stick, this is one stupid story. At least I just read one of your inane stories.

I’m sorry but not only is this implausible but it’s nauseating. It’s wrong in so many ways & it’s not even particularly well written.

I read a few of the comments to see if they had the same thoughts. Lots. Who in their right mind thinks ginormous breasts are what real people want. My wife quit riding with me on our motorcycle because she hurts with 35D. Granted this is a porn reader's site but come on... plus, authors, get your editing tools updated.

That was going along pretty smoothly until you had to put the mother into the sexual mix. I'm sorry, that was just creepy. And I think ALL of the kids would have thought it was creepy that grandma, who had been living with them for years, was suddenly shagging daddy. The other lousy idea was making the tits so big. Don't know why that bothers me but my first wife had large breasts, they were constantly causing her pain and it was impossible to find a decent bra. All in all, not a good story.

Adding the mother was a real turnoff. Otherwise we'll done

Too stupid to be enjoyable ⭐️

Amazing everyone is up in arms about him banging his mother in law but no one was disturbed that his daugher wanted dibs on her father before her mom in three future. Even as a joke that's disturbing.

So, not really a great story. I will admit with the beyond stupid wife, gang-bangs and grandma fucking, it was bonkers enough to keep me reading till the end.

Agree with others. The grandmother as the replacement is just gross. If it had been wife's sister maybe, but like dude traded up to a 62 year old?

I know she’s a lying cheating whore who got what she deserved but the reason she’s been out of the work circuit was to bring up THEIR kids so surely she’s entitled to some alimony if it wasn’t for her watching the kids he would never of made his fortune

"Actually I did pick the right person. If it wasn't for Jackson going after mom we'd still be married" what the fuck is this logic?

38G??? Seriously??? Bye. no stars

This story doesn't worth reading at all.

Amazingly enough, you have no writing talent to speak of. This must be, in actual fact, one of the very worst stories here on LW. No, upon reconsideration, it’s one of the worst I’ve EVER read.

Dear reader, if you truly enjoyed this story, you are undoubtedly of substandard intelligence. I’m sorry.

Do you think you can move the writing style from 7th grade to maybe 12th grade?

Seven kinds of stupid.

Would have rather seen father and daughter incest.

I only managed to read one paragraph then gave up with it deciding that it was too pathetic to bother with, just a load of bollocks

Iv got nothing good yo say, So I’ll say nothing the sequel may help you redeem yourself, but you’ll have to burn the bitch too. She needs to be punished.

1 ⭐

Why? Why I am not an attorney. Put ethics and morality before legality!!!

After first set of pictures should have dumped him as a client.

Speed read rest.

Should not have lied about taking her back.

Should have told kids would not take her back under any circumstances. BUT he definitely had some signs of wimpy cuckold.

How stone do you have to be to stick your pen inside a old woman. Are you that weak that you can't get a date?

Great story didn't need the incestuous ending. 5*****

Lol, as a rule of thumb don't write characters that are clearly meant to be intelligent because you're limited by your own and it doesn't work.

It seemed to be going so well. Then he got involved with the mother in law and it started circling the drain.

Wow 5 stars for Great Epic Story. I liked the Hot MIL I have had several young GF that had a Mom even hotter than my GF. LOL I found it very hilarious how the stubborn wife would NOT listen to her X husband and ended up in the gang bang. Maybe she wanted all the men to piss in her mouth. Takes all kinds. LOL Great fun story. Good Effort. Tks Buster2U

Weak 3 stars. Why the fuck is he paying for the gold digging evil cunt and letting her be in the house? Could have been an amazing story, then turned into complete garbage in the last page.

Fucked up story. I think the author is trying to convey his frustrated sexual history through this story.

This story seems to be written like rehearsal for lies and betrayal after one is caught red handed.

20 stars for writer! Big Blazing stars. I like Annabelle, a hot young college slut who is ready to fuck her Daddy! Sweet! Thanks, for the effort. Good Job. Thanks, Buster2U

You might have had a little too much fun writing this one. Talk about over the top.

Well that went to hell in a hand basket the minute you made all the women in it dumber than stumps and then you piled on by having him fuck his mother-in-law. That was creepier than all getout.

My only issue with this is the husband bailing the slut out of everything. Shit, she couldn't say "I love you" in 20 years, why would he lift a finger? The kids are adults, if they want to help that's on them.

Enjoyed it, wife not believing what was going to happen was a little stupid and the mother-in-law sex/marriage felt out of place. not enough damage to the billionaire at the end.

Picture 38G tits! Now picture the big ole heifer carrying those 38G's. Every woman I've ever met with big tits that large were very large women. Nah, I don't understand why Authors think big udders on a big ole heifer is appealing to most men. Tits may be the primary attraction for most men but not me. Give me a set of B's or C's and I'm interested. The story was good but you need to proofread your own material. Like I've suggested to a dozen friends/Authors, Load your story text into Text Aloud and listen to your story and it'll help you pickup on your mistakes. Typical for a story at Literotica but scored 5 stars for originality.

Really? How stupid would she have to be? If you had access to the other two videos wouldn't all it taken would be to show *them* to her then say, "Now, feel free to find the records or when either of *those* two stupid women married Jackson."

I mean you're still divorcing her of course...

[27.11.23]

Top Shelf!

11/10!!!!!

Are you kidding me? All this reprehensible stuff in front of, or involving, the kids? Really? What psychotic, F’d up world do you come from that this is where your mind goes in creating fiction? For fucks sake.

A bit ridiculous, too many holes. Karen didn't believe husband but he was too dumb prove it all by showing her videos of the other wives downfall. 50 guys scewing her and peeing in her mouth would have taken a long time. Ten minutes per man for at least 500 minutes. Divide 60 that would be over 8 hours and she proably would be dead in 6 hours or so, or drowned. The he marries the step mother? Just too absurd.

Marrying the Mother-in-law was a terrible idea this story. It actually ruined it. 1 star. Too bad, because this author had other stories that were good.

This was a very crazy, poor effort from a writer who usually tells a very good story. It paints the wife and the other two women as completely stupid and with no ability to think and learn. Also what did he sue Jackson for that would produce a guilty verdict ...Worth $ 350 M? Sorry maybe a 2/5

So the millionaire buys his kids a Small Car (read death trap) to Share! but buys his slut ex wife a house. You are obviously not a father, and please don’t be one. Absolutely terrible plot and characters. Good writing though. Kinda like mixing 21 year old Single Malt Scotch with Coke Cola

I’m sorry, but this just seemed like “this happened, traen that happened, and the this other thing happened.” There was no suspense about what was going to happen. The main character was a prince among men the children all devoted, the mother-in-law one in a million, and the ex-wife stupid beyond words. So realistic? Nowhere near.

dumb & unbelievable

Totally absurd: 1) he lives with a wife that never says she loves him after he says those words? He knew she married for the money & lifestyle, & he accepts that? That's not a marriage.

2) she doesn't believe him, or later the children, when told what would happen, which happened 2 other times. She deserves WTF she gets. For me, for the total lack of respect & betrayal, I wouldn't have bothered to get her after Jackson dumped her. She had her chance, well chances, & blew it big time.

3) she got a few STDs from her "party"; let her go to social services for the medicines. He could afford it with little problem, but WHY should he? The same goes for the phone: cancel it.

4) unless there's no apartments in the area, why is he getting her a house, albeit a small one? Get a small 1bdrm apartment, pay some months in advance, & tell her to get a job somewhere. After those months're done, she's on her own. Same for electric, phone, etc.

5) bottom line- he owes her nothing but giving her a great deal, even with that disrespect & betrayal. For a big lawyer, he's actually somewhat wimpish in what he's doing- setting her up in a house, expenses paid, etc. And the car! (Well, that I can see, as long as it's used.)

6) not fully ended: how ex-wife fared, what happened in the lawsuits, & mostly with Jackson. Best of all worlds, he's visited late at night by all 3 husbands in disguise, & winds up in the hospital with some broken bones & his balls kicked into his mouth.

7) the mother in law: they start having sex, not only before the divorce's settled, but at all?

8) all in all, this entire story, even for fiction, hard to believe. No real dialogue between wife & husband, nor the setup dialogue between her & Jackson. Almost like a "what happened" report like I used to write, which's why I'd suck at writing any stories (I tried!). All in all, 2 stars- esp. for him setting his ex up & the somewhat unfinished story. Make it more believable & it could be easily a 4.