by patricia51
You should take the discarded useless spouse from both tales and put them together. Now that would be REALLY funny.
Very funny short story brought a smile to my face went to read it to my wife... Where hell is she now... Must be in the kitchen that's where a woman in supposed to be...What's this note in the fridge Oh Nooooooo! ;^}
I read the other one first - thought this would be the other side of THAT story - pleasantly surprised it wasn't. all in all, a good read.
ps: I'm a guy, and can be sort of insensitive at times, but even I'd have to try really really hard to be that cold and insensitive. Come to think of it, the last time we went fishing, it was her idea. She buys the beer, and I do my own laundry...Hmmm perhaps she was one of these guys in a previous life?
I try so hard not to be that guy ,yeah im fat but then again always have been.but still im so glad im not him.
You have to wonder why we call ourselves 'Thinking Man' when so many of us don't ;)
Good one as always, patricia.
great laugh. can't wait for more stories from you. loved how it was only one-sided too, it gave it a certain feel.
Has been reviewed on the New Story Reviews thread of the Author's Hangout.
Great story because it's a fine example of "show me, don't tell me."
Loved it, thank you.
PUT ANOTHER LOG ON THE FIRE
Put another log on the fire.
Cook me up some bacon and some beans.
Go out to the car and change the tire.
Wash my socks and sew my old blue jeans.
Come on, baby, you can fill my pipe,
And then go fetch my slippers.
Boil me up another pot of tea.
Then put another log on the fire, babe,
And come and tell me why you're leaving me.
Now don't I let you wash the car on Sunday?
Don't I warn you when you're gettin fat?
Ain't I a-gonna take you fishin' with me someday?
Well, a man can't love a woman more than that.
Ain't I always nice to your kid sister?
Don't I take her driving every night?
So, sit here at my feet 'cos I like you when you're sweet,
And you know it ain't feminine to fight.
So, put another log on the fire.
Cook me up some bacon and some beans.
Go out to the car and lift it up and change the tire.
Wash my socks and sew my old blue jeans.
Come on, baby, you can fill my pipe,
And then go fetch my slippers.
Boil me up another pot of tea.
Then put another log on the fire, babe,
And come and tell me why you're leaving me.
Darn it, Patty. Just when the world was about to regain equilibrium from your first 'Clue', you had to give it a vicious kick right square in the south pole with a second 'Clue'. You've upset the natural balance and order of things again. Get a grip, girl. We can't take much more. There's a lot more I'd like to say but my fingers are shaking too hard from uncontrolable laughter.
Thanks for brightening our day.
I spewed my drink all over my screen reading and laughing so much.
You should have put a notice in the beginning 'make sure there's nothing in your mouth while you're reading' LOL
Patricia,
Your submissions truly deserve a forum not shared with the all-too-much drivel that is so often posted here! Another outstanding effort. It's a joy to see a new story with you listed as its author.
Sounds like Al Bundy on his next to worst day. His worst day would be giving Peg's Mom a bath at the car wash.
Wow, a hit right in the bullseye. This site really needed something like this. This should be required reading for every male entering matrimony. Very well done -- again, thank you, Pat.
This was a perfect folow-up to the original. Loved it.
But you didn't explain how to make the coffee---I would have liked to know... ROTFLMAO.
Thank you
Your Humble Knight
WD