All Comments on 'Wrath of a Mother'

It is obvious that English is not your primary language. Learn the language better. Have someone proofread what you write before you post or publish it. Have the same person or someone else edit your writing before you publish it. Keep writing, and recognize that if you are going to write in English you need help. Good luck.

Never argue with your mother, as it's said- "Mother knows best"!

Beautiful writing on how her touch felt and affected his body.

The story itself was good but it's obvious English isn't your native language. Someone that could read over your stories and correct them would be really helpful.

Please! Get an editor! This story had possibilities, but the story was jerky and did not flow. The characters seemed wooden and the dialogue did not enhance the story. Overall, I saw this was your first story on the site and you have a lot to learn. So keep writing and keep learning. Thanks for your efforts.

TOO MANY GRAMMER MISTAKES. OBVIOUSLY ENGLISH IS NOT YOUR NATIVE LANGUAGE.

I liked your tale but you need to get someone to edit your work. It was full of

errors.

One of the worst written stories I've read in a long time, I couldn't even get halve way through the first page.

This story is quite good but your English is really bad you need an editor

Please please I beg of you learn the english language before you post another story.I was cringing the whole read.I wanted to have my 8th grade English teacher call you and teach you English and good sentence construction.

It's obvious English isn't this writer's first language. If you don't like it... DON'T READ IT!!

You will eventually learn the idiocy that is the English language.

I liked the story although I feel he (maybe?) could've done something more to make mom realize he isn't his father; something to help calm her anger?

You have a good first time story here - don't let these trolls beat you up.

Keep writing, can't wait to read your next story.

Is it fair to blame and beat a sun for his cheating father? This mother is so violent, in her anger over her betraying husband... Why did her son not hit her back, or at least push and shove his mother away from him, to escape the violence?

You cannot stop a woman once she is mad with anger. Yet an angry woman is so unattractive to me, that I cannot believe that an 18 year old son would start to feel aroused, even after his mother slapped him in his face several times.

Let's twist around the genders in this story: the cheating person is the mother, the angry person is the father and the beaten person is the daughter. Could you imagine the daughter feeling any sexual attraction for her angry father?

No, not me! The violence of the parent takes away any form of (reluctant) consent and turns the scene into rape. If the receiving child would be a daughter, this story might end up being banned from the site, for promoting rape.

Now the son is the victim, we assume he likes what he gets, so the double standard kicks in and we tolerate this story. Yes me too, because I did read till the end and I am able to image what 'forbidden arousal' feels like, from my own experience.

Just because young men get erections easily, does not mean that it is less emotionally harming to be sexually abused! The emotional damage done to the son will creep in later, just like this story left me with a foul taste in my mouth.

That does not mean the writer is a bad writer. I am strongly opposed against the contents of the story, but the writing style is OK. Otherwise I would not have read the story till the end. Maybe other readers did get really aroused, without remorse?

What language did you transliterate that from?

Obviously English isn't your first language but this was pretty good, easy to understand, of course there's plenty room for improvement but you did good. Loved the story just great keep up the good work.

I am guessing that you wrote the story in your first language and had a computer translate it. That said, while there was some merit, the plot was implausible. Keep at it but get help with your diction and grammar.

You're biography doesn't indicate where you are from but I'm guessing India. However, it really doesn't matter. That being said, your English is far better than my ability to speak any of the languages spoken where you live.

So I say BRAVO for your brave attempt to give us a good story. While I share some of the constructive comments submitted, I was still able to follow the story and be entertained by it. Thank you for your submission. Next time reach out to some of the authors in Literotica for support. I'm betting that many of them would be happy to help.

Keep writing, you'll get better with time.

Yes, this is written by someone who does not have English as a mother tongue. Needed a LOT of editing and independent help beforehand.

Bravo for trying...but much more work is needed to do a better job if you dare submit another tale.

Barely could read skipping whole paragraphs the broken English made it horrible

This is so different from any Mother/Son story I have ever read, forget the criticism, loved it, sexy and hot, had.me hard

A mystery with fucking. The mystery... figuring out what you are writing. You obviously speak English as a second language. You need someone to translate what you write into proper english. Keep writing but get the help that you need.

It's obvious English isn't the writers native language but he somehow crafted a wonderful story despite that.

Continue to hone your writing skills :)

Please edit it reads like a 3rd grade essay

Mother is way too abusive and it’s rushed. Please revise!

"LIER" Hilarious admission of illiteracy.

Here again comments are not understandable! Author write what he wants if you don't like don't read ! I liked this novel, yes the mother is strong, but if this is author view ?!

English, yes maybe, but how many are non english native ?

Sure this is good to provide return but to discourage a new writer is unfair... look like french teachers...