About a month after I started my senior year in high school I got this note to see Nurse Stallings right after school. I had swim practice that day, but the note seemed pretty insistent, so I showed up at exactly 3:30.
The last time I was in the nurse's office was like two years ago, when I was 16, because I twisted my ankle running. There is an outer waiting area and then another office where you go to get examined. When I walked into the waiting area, Nurse Stallings was writing something on a clipboard. I just stood there shuffling around until I caught her attention.
"Oh yes," she said, "Bryan Atkins."
She disappeared for a second and then came back with a file. "You haven't turned in a physical exam form."
I was supposed to get checked out three weeks ago before school started, but I got the flu so I skipped it. I thought it was kind of funny then - I'm not going to doctor because I'm sick. Well she didn't think it was funny.
"Mr. Atkins, you're not even supposed to be going to practice without an exam," she said. "It's state law."
"If you want to keep working out with the team I'll need to examine you right away."
I wasn't really thrilled with the thought of being checked out by Nurse Stallings, but I couldn't keep skipping practices either.
"Now?" I said.
"Yes, now." She led me through one of those little half doors into the office and area and motioned me to go into the examining room. "Strip down to your underwear," she said, "and sit on the table. I'll be with you in a few minutes."
I walked into the room, laid my backpack on a chair, looked up and noticed Jennifer Lowry sitting there reading a book.
Jennifer Lowry was a senior last year. Slightly geeky, somewhat undeveloped, no date for the prom. The only reason I even knew her name is that she was always showing up at pep rallies and organizing school events last year. She has an equally geeky sister, Pamela, currently a sophomore who sometimes acts as a timer at our swim meets. So why was Jennifer sitting here in the examining room?
She put on her glasses. "Bryan?"
"Yeah. What are you doing here?"
"Oh I'm here for Student Shadow Day."
The local community college runs a Shadow Day, where the students can pick a job they're interested in and then find someone willing to "shadow" them (meaning: work alongside them) for the day.
"So you're interested in being a nurse?" I asked like I really cared.
"Yes, and Nurse Stallings is letting me shadow with her for the day."
"Why are you here?" she asked.
"Physical exam," I shrugged. "They won't let me play without one."
"You're on the varsity baseball team and swim team, right," she said.
"Yeah -- and track.."
Then Nurse Stallings opened the door. "Bryan, why are you still dressed?" Jennifer and I looked at eachother.
"Jennifer," Nurse Stallings said, "Bryan is here for a complete physical exam. This will be a good experience for you. As a nurse you will assist in many physical examinations for young males."
No one bothered to ask me how I felt about this. Being examined by this old crone was one thing, but having Jennifer, who was practically my age, seeing me in my underwear was slightly uncool.
OK, so now I was supposed to just casually take off my clothes. I started by removing my school jacket and draping it over a chair. Then I took off my running shoes and stuck them under the chair. I took off my white socks and rolled them into a ball and put them in one of the shoes. I removed my sweatshirt and tee underneath in one motion and put them in a pile over my school jacket. I could feel the air from a ceiling fan on my bare chest.
I loosened the belt on my pants and undid the top button. I looked up and could see Jennifer and Nurse Stallings standing there looking at me. Fuck it, I thought, the sooner I do this the sooner it will be over. I pulled my jeans down to the floor and stepped out of them. I put the pants on the pile of clothes and stood there wearing only my light blue Gap boxer-briefs. I tried to avoid eye contact with Jennifer who I think was staring at my crotch.
"Jennifer," Nurse Stallings said, "I'll let you weigh Bryan." I walked over and stepped onto the scale and Jennifer just stood there trying to figure it out. This was one of those gym scales where you had to balance the weights. I moved them myself while she watched and it came to 155 pounds. Nurse Stallings gave her a sheet, which had the words "Physical Exam-Male" at the top and I could see Jennifer making some marks on it.
After my weigh-in, I was told to get on the examining table. Nurse Stallings got this little flashlight and shined it in my eyes while I looked straight ahead. Then she had Jennifer do the same thing while she jotted something on the sheet. Then my ears were looked at. I was told that they could be cleaner, which made me feel like I was 5. Then I had to stick out my tongue and Nurse Stallings and Jennifer looked down my throat.
Nurse Stallings listened to my lungs with a (cold) stethoscope and then Jennifer did too, except that she dropped the stethoscope on the floor and they had to get a new one. When she was listening to my chest, I thought Jennifer's hand grazed one of my nipples. But maybe it was my imagination.
Then Nurse Stallings showed Jennifer how to take my blood pressure and heart rate. This took several minutes because she was so clumsy. "Your resting heartrate is 60," Nurse Stallings said. "That's very healthy." "You have a very athletic build, very little body fat," Nurse Stallings announced clinically.
"Bryan is on the varsity baseball and swim team," Jennifer said.
"Yes," she added, "and track.."
"Now Bryan, lie flat on your back," Nurse Stallings said, thumping on my stomach. Then Jennifer felt around my stomach, which was just weird. Then I got back up again and with my legs dangling from the table, they tested my reflexes. I think Jennifer hit my knee like 15 times before she got it right.
Nurse Stallings then took Jennifer over by a desk in the corner and made some more marks on the form. I was still sitting on the exam table in my underwear, swinging my legs back and forth. Then she pointed to an item on the form and asked Jennifer something, but I couldn't quite make out. "Is it something I should observe?" Jennifer said. "Oh definitely," Nurse Stallings said, "it's a standard part of the exam." Jennifer looked over at me, then thought for a moment and nodded to Nurse Stallings.
"OK, Bryan," said Nurse Stallings, "could you please come over and stand up straight."
I hopped off the table and walked over to the two of them, Nurse Stallings who was almost my height in her white uniform and Jennifer who was a foot shorter than me.
"I'll need you to pull down your shorts for me," Nurse Stallings announced. Or at least that's what I thought she said, I couldn't quite believe it.
"I'm sorry, what?"
"Pull down your shorts," she said slowly. "We need to inspect your genitals." We?? So that's what they were whispering about. Again, no one bothers to ask me.
"Bryan," Nurse Stallings said with a trace of exasperation, "this is a standard part of the exam. And I think it will benefit Jennifer to see it for her future studies." I looked at Jennifer who had this like dreamy look in her eyes. But when our eyes met, she quickly looked away.
So what's the deal? I'm supposed to expose myself to this girl whose sister I see every day? Something about this was very wrong. I'm supposed to be the one looking at naked girls. They're not supposed to be inspecting me and checking me out.
"Well I mean, do I have to.. you know, in front of... you know..." I just stammered trying to think of something to say. "What I mean is, you know in front of... a girl..."
"Bryan," Nurse Stallings said firmly. "Jennifer is here to learn about being a nurse. Most nurses are women and most of the younger doctors are women also. So I suggest that you get used to being examined by females."
"And a complete physical examination requires an inspection of your genitals." Nurse Stallings turned to Jennifer: "Jennifer, you'll find that high school boys can get very bashful."
I closed my eyes, pulled down my light blue Gap boxer-briefs to my knees, and stood there with my dick and balls hanging out for everyone to see. I could hear Jennifer inhale through her mouth.
"Bryan is circumcised," Nurse Stallings announced. "When a boy is circumcised, the foreskin is removed. You'll notice that the head of Bryan's penis is exposed." Jennifer nodded.
These two women are discussing my dick! Is Jennifer going to tell her geeky sister that she saw Bryan's dick? I mean we talk about girls' boobs constantly in the locker room. Is it possible that now girls will be talking about my cock in their locker room? This is just not right.
"If Bryan were uncircumcised, we would need to check under his foreskin. But that's not necessary for circumcised boys." Nurse Stallings jotted something down on the form - probably noting that my dick is cut. Great.
"Next we check for a hernia," said Nurse Stallings. "This is very important. A weakness like that could cause Bryan to hurt himself." Nurse Stallings then grabbed my balls and told me to turn my head and cough. I'm been through that drill before.
"Now you try it."
Jennifer hesitantly put her hand on my nuts. My dick twitched right in front of her; I couldn't help it.
"Please cough," she said trying to emulate the nurse.
"Turn your head and cough," Nurse Stallings corrected.
So we went through it again.
"Now we should take a closer look at Bryan's testicles," Nurse Stalling said. Great. I already wanted to crawl in a hole and die.
"Boys Bryan's age are prone to testicular cancer so its important that they perform a self-test on their testicles periodically." Can't she say "guys like Bryan"? "Boys" makes it sound like I'm a kid.
"Bryan," asked Nurse Stallings, "do you periodically check your testicles for a lump?" Oh God, does she have to ask this now?
"Um.. well.. sometimes.."
"See?" she said to Jennifer. "Boys don't check themselves out. So we should do it now while we have the opportunity." I guess the "opportunity" she's talking about is that my shorts are down to my knees and my dick and balls are dangling in front of me.
Nurse Stallings grabbed each ball gently but firmly and rolled it around in her fingers. "Nothing abnormal here," she said, and wrote something down.
"Your turn," she said to Jennifer.
Very hesitantly, Jennifer reached down and felt my left ball.
"Now roll it around and see if you feel anything."
She started delicately fingering my nuts and... well I tried to think of doing sit-ups and math homework and disgusting insects... but the only message coming from my teenage brain was - a girl has her hands on your balls. And right in front of her eyes, BOING, my dick started to rise. By the time she was through checking my balls, my 18 year old penis was pointing straight out at her like a guided missile.
Startled at my erecting penis, Jennifer backed away. Nurse Stallings said, "Don't be concerned, Jennifer. Boys Bryan's age are very sensitive and often develop erections when their genitals are being examined. It will subside."
I just stood there with my head down, not really wanting to look at Jennifer while my dick was bobbing up and down. OK, so now lame sophomore girls are going to hear about my hardon too. "Can I pull up my shorts now?" I asked.
"Just a second." Nurse Stallings looked at her watch. "Jennifer, since we don't have anyone else waiting, I should take this opportunity to show you how to perform a digital rectal exam. Its optional for boys as young as Bryan, but its standard part of a complete physical for a male. Would you like to see how a rectal exam is performed?" she asked Jennifer.
Of course no one asked me. I guess Jennifer must have nodded yes because I was asked to remove my underwear completely - now I was totally naked - and lie on my back on the examining table. I just closed my eyes and tried to think of being somewhere else, except that my dick was hard and pointing up at the ceiling.
I just kept thinking that this girl is getting to see me - Bryan - totally naked, totally vulnerable and there's nothing I can do about it. I have to lie here and let her see all my private parts.
I could hear the sound of latex gloves being snapped on and Nurse Stallings talking in hushed tones about "lubricating" something or other.
"Bryan," Nurse Stallings said, "could you please pull your knees up? OK, now spread your legs."
I opened my eyes and lifted my head a bit and saw Nurse Stallings straddling my legs and Jennifer right behind her starting at my hole. This shameful part of my body and I have to show it to this geeky college girl. I imagined the conversation between her and her geeky sister. "I got to see Bryan's hairy asshole" -- "Really? What does it look like?" I can just forget my cool rep now.
Nurse Stallings said, "Bryan, I'm going to insert my glove now. Try to bear down like you are having a bowel movement." So now Jennifer's sister can picture me sitting on the toilet. Another great image. I mean forget it now. I can never show my face to a girl in this high school again.
I felt the finger start to enter my butt. Nothing has ever entered my hole before. It felt weird and actually kind of good in a way. It swirled around for a bit and I started to shake and.. oh fuck. Oh shit. My dick twitched suddenly and I came all over my chest.
Nurse Stallings removed her finger from my butt and looked at it. "Everything seems normal. Jennifer, could you hand Bryan a paper towel."
"Sometimes rectal stimulation causes boys to ejaculate," Nurse Stallings said.
Jennifer handed me a paper towel and stood there looking at me, lying naked on the table. While she watched, I wiped my dripping cock and the cum from my chest. She also watched as I spread my legs and wiped my hole.
"Can I please put my underwear back on," I asked, trying to restore some sense of modesty. Nurse Stallings nodded.
The phone rang and Nurse Stallings picked it up. She talked for a moment, put the receiver down, and motioned Jennifer to come over. "I'm needed elsewhere," she said, handing the exam form to Jennifer. "I'll let you take care of this last matter," she said pointing to the form.
Nurse Stallings exited the room. Jennifer took a plastic cup and motioned me into a small bathroom inside the office.
"Um, Bryan," she said, "Nurse Stallings asked me to take care of one last thing."
She waved the plastic cup. "Urine test."
I waited for her to leave.
"The form says, 'Urine test-observed.'
"What do you mean, 'observed'?
"Well they need to make sure it's your urine, so its not tampered with, you know, in case of drugs."
"So you're telling me --"
"I have to watch you pee."
Well I started stammering again, which is what I do when I'm nervous. "Well, now... now... come on... Jennifer... now... you know I don't do drugs... I mean you don't actually want to have to see me... you know..."
She smiled, for the first time. "Bryan, I've just seen you naked. I've touched your balls. I've seen you cum."
Well I couldn't argue with her. I was also a little shocked to hear her use the words "balls" and "cum."
"Can I ask you something?"
"Well," I said, "I mean - for you - this was like all professional right?"
"What do you mean?" she asked.
"I mean... this was part of some career thing... its not like you got off on it right?"
She smiled again. "Bryan, I do want to be a nurse." Pause. "But I'm also a girl."
"What does that mean?"
"It means I like looking at boys."
I was afraid that's what it meant.
"You mean the way guys look at girls?"
"We girls aren't that obvious, but yes."
"So you liked seeing..."
"Your penis?" she said. "Yes. Its beautiful."
I've never heard my dick described as beautiful before. "Are you surprised to hear that?"
"I remember watching you at varsity swim meets last year and thinking you had a beautiful body."
OK, on the one hand I was flattered to hear this: I mean who wouldn't be? On the other hand, I felt violated. Violated? Did I actually say that?
"Do you feel uncomfortable letting me see you like this?" Jennifer asked.
My pride wouldn't let me admit it. But my red face gave it away.
"I felt... a little on display."
"Having to submit your private parts for inspection?"
"Well I enjoyed the education."
I smiled at last. "Glad I could be of service, I guess."
"Nurse Stallings believes that its good for girls to inspect boys. She says that it removes a lot mystery surrounding gender."
"Some of us like to keep a little mystery..." I said, still smiling.
"Don't worry," she said, ruffling my hair a bit. "Your mystery is safe with me."
She looked at her watch. "Speaking of Nurse Stallings, she is going to wonder what we're been doing in here."
Oh yes, I had one other duty to perform. I lowered my Gap shorts to my knees one more time, letting her see my soft dick flop out. It took a few seconds, since I'm not used to urinating on command.
Jennifer looked on in fascination as a pee stream flowed out of my cock. She handed me a plastic cup, which I quickly filled, and the stream just went on and on - I hadn't peed since lunch.
Eventually, the stream reduced to a trickle. Then I pulled up my shorts for the last time and tucked my penis inside. "First time I've ever peed in front of a girl."
"First time I've ever seen a guy pee." Then she squeezed my hand. I quickly dressed and left the office. On my way out I saw Jeff Drake, one of my baseball teammates, sitting in the waiting area.
I could hear Nurse Stallings: "Mr. Drake, strip down to your underwear. I'll be with you in a few minutes."
I turned around and saw Tim go into the examining room, greeted by a smiling Jennifer. Another boy for her inspection.