All Comments on 'Nightshade Ch. 01'

Do what you've been doing. This chapter seems very nice. As far as desires go however, we have a main character who is hypersexual usually, beautiful and far more intelligent than she lets others know, as a game. You have yet to have either of your other characters call her a human directly.

I couldn't think of a reason to have someone address Crystal directly as "human," whether dismissively or otherwise. I'm also surprised at actually receiving feedback; my other stories have no comments. I've almost convinced myself I write very poorly compared to other authors.

a poor writer. Your talent is obvious - what is needed is experience and skill - especially with regards to transitions. Please do continue as your tale is quite delightful to read.

Thank you, anonymous user who said all I need is practice. I can see your point as I've only been writing erotic stories on and off for three months. The 200ish short stories I wrote had little to no erotic content so I am pretty much guessing at a proper flow. I realize my main flaw is lack of detail which amounts to poor sex scenes.

This story has a lot of potential and it's really good so please continue for a long time!

The second chapter will be worked on as soon as possible. I have a sequel for another story in the works that should have been done already as well a third chapter for my fanfiction series. I hate that I'm behind in my work but it happens I guess. The other stories will be finished as fast as possible.

This story... Just wow. I can't even explain my thoughts on how good this story is. Please continue