All Comments on 'Our Little Secret Ch. 01'

I'm sure it's been done before — everything's been done at least once before — but this is a welcome intro to your story.

Joel's milquetoast personality was well presented without the usual over-egging that rubs on your last nerve. I look forward to more of this quality of character development.

Now, I'm off to read something else of yours.

Compelling and engaging start. Can't wait for more

But I liked it a lot. I hope I find chapter two one day. Now off to see what else you have written

....not that there aren't other unique and great stories, but that there are so many rewrites of stories that were among the first defining stories of a given category. It seems a rare jewel, then, that someone has the creative will to write a story and present it well, leaving us both surprised and delighted.

Thank you.

Thanks for your input and feedback. More chapters are coming.

The first page almost put me to sleep, doesn't help that I'm reading at 3am. Then just when I thought this is too much mundane for any sane person ..... WAM, it becomes a story that forces me from a lying down position to sitting up with my full attention! I really like where this seems to be going and best of all there are six more chapters to gobble up. Thank god no work tomorrow(Easter), I'm going to make some popcorn and start the next chapter!

Wow, a story that is not only intriguing but also well written. He didn't just get a ring et al that gives him amazing powers. I haven't read any of your stories before but I am excited to continue reading this story arc. Thanks for sharing your work.

This was a dazzling stream of discourse. Being something of a tech myself, the jargon was splendid. Yet Mind control leading to leaden lovers, quite the opposite of what we are used to. Still, I like your choice of words (bedroom brown eyes comes to mind), and Keith had that room-filling presence. I suspect that much will change as Joel realizes his new powers..?

Great set up. Unique story. Excellent detailed bringing the characters to life.Five stars

Looking forward to the next chapter.

Really enjoyed this.. Makes a refreshing change. Would love to read more into the mystery...