All Comments on 'Chinese Takeout Ch. 05'

You describe the toxic culture of the OLMGs so well. Although your Keith has some decent qualities, for a woman to have "Property Of" displayed on her leathers says it all.

Lue

Ps: Now, how about Srawberry? I like Strawberry.

Their foreplay is steaming hot but I'm hoping these two get to the action soon. Though, of course this pace is more than reasonable in real life... they just met.

Nervously awaiting how her original date is going to tie in and mess up their relationship. Potentially the son of the strip club Wong and part of the Triads?

I don't want them to have to go through any hardship before their happily ever after but somehow don't think that's the way it will go.

Regardless, looking forward to more!

When ,and if, this story gets bound together as a book, it will be a great read.

The only problem I have with it now is that I have to wait for the next episode.

The characters are getting better and better, ( I was waiting for Round Out's other side...) the foreplay is hot, and the story is intriguing.

Keep it up....

I don't want this one to end.

I love your writing. It's like a drug that takes me to a different existence . Once I start reading, I can't stop. You have amazing insight into so many things for someone so young. You either have a very diverse and interesting group of friends, or you're actually 60 years old. LOL. I love your characters. They seem so real. Thank you for sharing your writing with us. I will definitely buy your work when you go pro.

Steve in NC

So, been reading the entire story through and while I usually come here for the obvious reasons of sexual fantasies, im finding myself reading this for the story rather than the sexual interludes.

Now before I go further I should mention that im a huge reader, going through multiple books during a normal week and have been for the last 25 years or so.

I think this story has massive potential, not just as a Literotica story but as a "real" story.

While it does read like something taken out of "Brothers of Anarchy" with the vocabulary and some of the personas, it's really interesting to read about the "other side" of the table, get the girls view.

I like the action as well, and I like it's not a 1% club, since turning it into a story about a bunch of drug-sellers or gun-smugglers would make it too much like SOA for my taste, keep's it "real" and it'll definitely keep me coming back for more.

Please keep up the good work!

Chloe,

you've knocked it out of the park again, another 5* from me.

Great character development.

Story flows well.

Enjoying the slow burn between Jay-Lin and Keith.

However;

Some of the paragraphs tend to ramble on a bit, could be more concise.

A few spelling/wrong word mistakes, notably the word "of" instead of "off" in several places.

Also found the premise that a girl at a Catholic school could be picked up by a biker and then a condom delivery van without word getting back to her parents a little far fetched. However, I understand the tension/conflict you are building between Jay-Lin's existing life and her future life with Keith adds to the story.

Overall very enjoyable read and looking forward to future chapters.

Don't know how to express my admiration of your story and gratitude for the education

Andrew

I've really liked your story and can't wait fo #6 ,, it's amazing how you've made the seam so much like a great novel and not a erotic story thanks again for the

Enjoyed it as always. Your Subject matter is on point with respect to most bike culture also.

Benn riding since I was 5 and I can almost see some of my brothers in your characters.

Again, well written and very enjoyable.

Jump into story at Chapter 2. Then I found my self start in chapter 1 till now.I'm a Chinese so totally understand how is Jay Lin in the stories.Good Stories, great character, nice bodyline.The story do bring the feelings of the Keith and Jay Lin like im one of them, Appreciate all the hard work you did on the reseach, I enjoy it a lot, Love it , Great job and really looking forward to next one.and last . I LOVE IT.

... when's the next chapter coming? Please Chloe don't keep us waiting. Re your comments about the ratings, When a chapter or story is several pages long it may be that the reader has to stop part way through and then come back to it and maybe more than once? Anyway keep up the good work, your stories have the ring of authenticity about them which makes them a great read. Many thanks. GJ

Be patient. Chloe has so many serial stories running at once that she does bits and pieces of each one as the mood seems to take her. It's frustrating if you are waiting for the next chapter of your favourite, but there can be gems from time to time in other stories she produces.

So while you are waiting for more Baby Blue, look across at Chloe's September Blue. For mine, this is the best thing she has produced to date. It is exceptional.

Lue

Thanks Lue :) - and yes, Chloe does.... usually when I've finished one of these chapters I need to switch to give myself a break by writing something different. I kind of immerse myself in my protagonist and it can be a bit intense sometimes. So switching keeps me fresh, I kind of do a round robin. And sometimes I get a story that just has to come out before I can focus on anything else. Strawberry Chapter 4 and September Blue were both like that. Now, that said, what's next.....

The LIT Winter Holidays competition opens Nov 10th and I have a story for that ("A Teddy Bear for Christmas") that's half completed already. I've had so many requests for the next chapter of Happy Birthday to Me that I've committed myself to writing that, and Chinese Takeout Chapter 6 is calling my name very loudly and I know exactly what's happening in that chapter - so these three will all be out for early to mid November at the latest.

After that, I'm planning Chinese Takeout chapter 7, two new Barbie Kiu stories ("After the Barbeque" - half written already - and then "Barbie in Bangkok"), a new stand-alone ("The Temptation of Sammi Woo") and then one in my head about two Korean girls who end up working in a room salon to finance their college study. And somewhere in there, Hayley is calling my name as well. So that's the plan through to Christmas and the early New Year anyhow.

Thanks Chloe and Lue. I know authors appreciate the feedback well so do those of us who add the comments appreciate that they are being read. I'm working my way through your stories and think that you are one of the best authors on this site. GJ

I'm enjoying the daylight savings out of this, though I would like to see Keith and Jay-Lin get it on. I would appreciate it if you have her visit her doctor and get an IUD, though. I feel that would add realism and responsibility, which is consistent with Blue's character.

A good story needs some kind of conflict, however, and I am waiting to see the form or forms you will give it. There is the inevitable fight when Daddy and Mommy discover Keith is almost twice Jay-Lin's age and a biker; the rematch with "the Chua bitch," and how her stripper sister will react to it; the fact Ginny's dad goes to a strip club and may not be confining his activities to the mah-jong tables; and Blue working her way into the biker culture. Don't keep us waiting for it too long, okay?

And although I may just be an old softy, I want this to end with a wedding. Or maybe two, the official Chinese wedding for the family and the community and a much bawdier biker wedding with a few of Jay-Lin's school friends there as well -- especially Ginny, who I'd love to see take up with a nice guy in the SBC when you wind the story up.

As I said, waiting for the next chapter.

First bunch of stories, delicious - with no fault in the language. Latest ones, however, many apostrophe errors, plural / possessive inversions, as well as common misspellings. Why the difference? Did you lose an editor? Are you too busy to edit yourself? I was so pulled in by the earlier "Chinese Takeout" stories. Very puzzled by grammar/spelling in the last couple or so. I'll still read you, though!

The grammar and spelling? Woe is me. I was pounding away intent on getting this one out and I didn't do the last couple of edits I usually do because I was so focused on finishing it and getting it submitted. I don't generally (ever) use an editor, I get too impatient waiting and every now and then it shows ... badly. On the other hand, I kind of treat Literotica as a good draft - I know there's mistakes and I have a huge rewrite planned to this once I actually finish the story in Lit. A new first two chapters, a lot more early hostility between the Chua bitch and Jay-Lin, some sort of issue that's troubling Jay-Lin's dad (a kind of secondary plot), building up Peter Wong as more of a stalker-type character. Anyhow, that's for the rewrite, right now Chapter 6 is the remainder of Jay-Lin's Saturday and dinner at Sally's, where Sally and Brody are introduced to Round Out.

Sir Galahad - Conflict? Yes, you're so right. It's been a bit too gradual and the rewrite will address some of this in future, with more up front conflict between Jay-Lin and the Chua bitch, and also with Peter Wong or one of Jay-Lin's other one-date wonders as more of a stalker type. Also, her Dad will be having some type of problem, which will be worrying Jay-Lin. Not to mention that Jay-Lin's Mom is also Hayley's aunt. So there's a link in to Hayley and some of the troubles facing Hayley's Dad (he and Jay-Lin's Mom don;t talk because Jay-Lin's Mom blames Hayley's dad for the death many years ago of her sister). Anyhow, in this draft the conflict does come at about Chapter 8 or 9 I think it is - the inevitable parental discovery of the relationship along with "Luther" seeking his revenge for his public humiliation by Round Out .... and then it's all on ....

Only the second story on literotica I've rated a five. It actually brought tears to my eyes at times. First time in twenty years that's happened.

Can't wait for more chapters. Keep them coming, Chloe

Love this story! Can't wait to read more.

Working on CT6 and CT7 now, as well as two valentine day competition stories, the next installmentz of Happy Birthday to Me, Jeong Park, two draft novels and a Barbie Kiu story. CT6 will come after the valentine day stories along with HBtM.

Going into withdrawal here and it's too f'ing cold to ride. Hope six seven et all is coming out soon! Excellent work!

Love your descriptive way of writing

It's wonderful and I do love the story

Thanks 🙏

Great story, I only ever give 4 stars in case there is something out there that is extra amazing, but you come very close. Can I make a suggestion? Be more descriptive about the look of the characters and their surroundings, it adds depth to the story elevating it above the average. I'm looking forward to the next episode, in the meantime I'm going to read your other submissions. Good luck.

It's hard to believe you've only been writing for a couple of years. I've gone through several of your stories in the last 24 hours and can't believe your talent.

I can't wait for the next chapters.

I've read a few of your other stories, maybe only a chapter or too, but this one has me hooked. I'm anxiously awaiting Chapter 6.

... so hopefully not too long a wait. As well as the next chapter of Happy Birthday to me.

Ms. Tzang,

Please continue with the storyline. I have found it quite intriguing. Several subplots have potential: the Benz-punk from chapter 1, finding boyfriends for her classmates, the mob boss causing trouble, the bff's father's gambling addiction, her parents, her sister & husband, college career choices, etc.

Aaaaagggghhhh! Next chapter already! The Tong boss is the Rice Boy's old man right? Do the neighbors get back in the wind? More!

Way past time for the next chapter. Really want to see how meeting the parents goes! Ready for the consumation!

LOVE YOUR STORY. So nice to find a writer that cares about GETTING IT Right when dealing with the biker lifestyle. So many write about us like the 1970 biker exploitation films were somewhere near reality or like the Sons of Annie Oakley was a documentary. Thank you for doing your research. I am checking every day to see if chapter six has arrived. Hope it does soon.

Love it. Ready for more... 😉

When might we see chapter 6 or more ?

There is still lots of story to be told :-)

Such great characters!

I just discovered your postings after reading your 2017April fools posting and thourghly enjoined Chinese Takeout! I can't wait for the next installment andi hope you do take it all the way!!!

Awesome story, Chloe. So primal, complex and sometimes slyly humorous., Such rich detail in the plot, characters, scenes.

The stories are a bit long. Readers with less "staying power," and I mean that in more than one way, may not be "up" for them.

Love your story Chinese Take out, you have what it takes to write a novel. Keep it coming, looking forward to Ch 6 and 7!

Please finish this story. I love what you've done so far. Looking forward to more, Baby Blue's could be one bad ass biker chick.

Not too long. If readers want short stories they can look elsewhere.

In response to reader requests (and I want to write them as well), I'm working on the next two chapters.... they're top of the list right now.

since I got my last fresh serving of Chinese Takeout that I had to go back and read the entire story again to refresh my taste buds and it's even tastier reheated. But another serving would be most excellent, but thanks most wonderfully for the Valentine's Day appetizer, The Wolf With Red Roses, that was most excellent! Your writing is most excellent, keep teasing us, we all hunger for your kind indulgence.

Interesting read - I really liked the variety of characters and situations.

Saw similar situation one time. Want to be scary ( and little drunk) guy wanted to scare a girl and was too slow to notice she was with a REAL scary guy. Scene ended with the want to be scary guy with broken jaw, on the floor doing EeeeEEEeee sound. But best i remember hes perfecly round 100% scared eyes. Crying.

Cant wait for the next installment

Well, the picking up your teeth comment was based on real life, just not mine :) - altho my partner kind of counts as one of those REAL scary guys if you meet him in a bar when he's hammered. His sense of humor is awful as well. Fortunately, mine is just weird and my party trick at College was thumping drunk guys in the guts so hard they puked. For a bet (as in "go on, I betcha ya can't...."). Usually the bet was for a free drink. Moral of the comment. Never pick on the little chinese girl in the corner of the bar that says she trains in Tae Kwon Do. She might, and she might be quite good at it and come with a weird sense of humor that tells her "go on, do it...". Or she might come with that big scary guy you didn't see ... LOL

I know, I know. And I am working on that next chapter. A few thousand words in right now. It covers Saturday afternoon, the evening at her sister Sally's with Round Out for dinner and Sunday morning.

And you are a wonderful storyteller. I just found you a couple of days ago. I am now anxiously waiting for the next chapter.

plz post some updates from time to time either here or on bio page so we see that u are still there and working on the next chapters :)

...this extended biker nonsense is getting boring. Really sad because the first 3 chapters were brilliant.

Have you abandoned us?

Thank you Chloe, I'm enjoying your stories immensely. Your plot, your characters, your dialog, what's not to love? YOUR LEAVING ALL US POOR SOTS HANGING! That's what not to love! Please, PLEASE, put us out of our misery! I for one, am dying to know how Blue (or you) is going to sell Kieth to her parents.

Ah, well, in the mean time I'll go on to one of your other stories.

Thanks Again

Don

This can't be a First Time story if there is no first time. Time for a new chapter, please. Looking forward to it.

... For leaving you all hanging so long. I'm going to get that next chapter up soon if it kills me. It won't, but there's a couple of others I'm trying to get done fast as well. Give me three weeks and you shall have your desire satisfied.

Nicely done, surprisingly good writing and character development. And very sexy.

Thanks, where's the next chapter?

I like most of your stories, but I really enjoy your Chinese Takeout series. Please please please can we have the next chapter?

It has been a very long time. Please send the next chapter soon.

Thanks

You write very well. I have found myself fascinated by Round out and Jay-lee; the sex scenes are an additional bonus. How will the dinner with Sally go? What impediments will arise to the course of true love? And will the relationship finally be consummated?

I particularly like your "one liners." Jane Austen did these well too!

Does anyone know what happened to Tzang? Did she die or get into WITSEC or something? Just saying it's been a year....

Love your story.

Please keep on writing.

Can't wait to read the next chapters.

No, still alive and working on Chapters 6 & 7 along with the next chapter of Happy Birthday. Give it a few weeks.

still amxiously waiting for more from this series!! its a great slow burn story

As a biker, and a member of a Patched Club, I love this series because you took the time to research WHO WE ARE and didn't run to the stereotype, thank you for that. Think you could throw up chapter six please? Even a rough draft would be appreciated.

I have to say I just love this story. The characters are great. I find myself reading just to find out what is going to develop. One of the best stories I have ever read here by far.

Love to hear that there is more chapters in writing.

Thanks for the reassurance about further chapters. Too good not to. Waiting with bated breath.

Any chance these stories will be turned into an epub file? Yes, I think your stories would be well-worth the extra effort. :)

.... try my latest story, "The Temptation of Sammi Woo." Round Out and Blue play bIt parts, the main character is another Chinese girl (Sammi Woo) and the sex is a lot more in your face. Anyhow, enjoy.

This is the coolest story. There's nothing quite like it on literoica. I'm not into bikes and clubs but respect those who are. I love reading about the lifestyle, the bikes the clothes; the new discoveries for someone from a different class/culture of people.

Please Finnish this story. You're an insightful Andy interesting writer. Plus you know how to tell a story in print like we were sitting across the table from one another . I love it. Thank you for all your hrs work and time. Pleas Finnish it.

You said back in July "chapter six and seven, just give it a few weeks". Well, a few weeks have become several months. If you are not gonna finish just tell us. Might surprise you to know several Bros (and a lot of Ol' Ladies) have read this story and want to see the promised 6&7. Right now the betting in the club house is about 60 percent that you have run dry. Hope they are wrong.

Working on chapter 6 but I also have some paid for stuff I need to get done and that's been taking my time away from this for a while now. It is continuing. And wow? An entire club is following this? I'm stunned. Okay, you kicked my butt.

I'll have to come up with another title. Don't wanna get creepy. From now on CT6 will be the subject line. Actually it's more than just my crew. Ladies talk, hell some bikers are bigger gossips than their Old Ladies (about some subjects). Word of your writing has made the rounds and good folks from several clubs (& several chapters) are following your work. Unlike many so called biker romance writers you have taken the time (& shown the respect) to do your research and not act like SOA was a documentary. I swear, if I see one more story with a character named Jax! Anyway, thanks for the response and we are looking forward to seeing chapter six! Best, Dutch.

Folks from several clubs (& several chapters) are following this? Now there's inspiration and motivation. Biker romances? I've read more than a few and I was always so disappointed with their unrealistic portrayal of bikers that when I started this, I really wanted to make sure it was more accurate. "Round Out" kindly stepped up to help me and I'm really grateful for that, He's the guy that should get the credit for the realism. As for SOA, I love the music! but the fan fiction! OMG! Anyhow, I've promised a few readers now that CT6 is coming soon so I'll get moving on it as soon as I have these paid pieces out of the way.

Yea, I like the music and the first two seasons wasn't TOO HORRIBLE, after that it was Supranos on Bikes. Congrats on the paid gigs and we're looking forward to six. Dutch

Tic Tock, tic tock.... Any chance before 2018? Dutch

If anticipation is 3/4ths of enjoyment, we're going to enjoy the hell out of future chapters!

How does early 2018 sound? Doing 2 stories for the Valentine's Day competition done and then I swear on my ancestors ashes that another chapter of Chinese Takeout will be next and served up before the end of February.

I’ve really enjoyed your story to date. Anxious to read the next chapter. Keep the good work

......we all know who deserves to have her writtings on the silver screen. Just so ya know.....I'll be single until I find another Jay-Lin.

Hope to see the Ch06 next week Chloe.

Hi Chloe

Well another Chinese new year also gone by... and it is already end of Feb.

We are still eagerly waiting for you for the next Chapter on Chinese Takeout.

Well reading Sammy Woo's adventures did give us the idea what did happen eventually and where the plot was going. But it would be nice to read about the Journey there.

You had sworn on your Ancestor's ashes to give us Ch 06 end of Feb 2018....just saying

But absolutely love all your stories. keep up the good work.

- RedDot

.... and telling her to get that next chapter moving... I'm working on this, the next chapter of Happy Birthday and a story for the April Fools Day competition. OMG and I promised this for the end of Feb and that's today. I'm hanging my head in shame. Soon, really really soon.... gulp.

And boy are they pissed

Lol. I found out what The Ashes are. Cricket. Okay. It's coming. Here's the writing schedule.

- finish "A Troll is Haunting Tex's" for the April Fools competition on Lit

- complete edit of "Mistaken Identity" and send thru to publisher

- complete next two chapters of Chinese Takeout for Lit

- complete next chapter of Happy Birthday for Lit

- two novellas for publisher

- next couple of chapters of Jeong Park for Lit

I love your story. I'm quite willing to suspend disbelief, especially given how hard I was laughing about the graphic image on a condom van picking Blue up from a Catholic Girl's School. That still makes me smile. Oh and the Catholic High School Girl in a strip club packing condoms into a machine was good too.

You also have me on edge about a whole bunch of ways Blue's parents might find out on accident: the condoms in her backpack, all sorts of clothing (the LBD, the lingerie, semen soaked panties, all the leather from this chapter), Ginny, Catholic School Adults, etc. And then there's your foreshadowing. I can see ways out of it, but I also see at least one train wreck coming.

One suggestion though, please reread your first chapter and fix a couple of continuity mistakes. In the first chapter it is one of the last nice days of fall and Blue is fifteen days away from her eighteenth birthday. I vastly prefer her being eighteen already, which is what you say everywhere else. And in this chapter and the previous one, it is now spring (which often works better for a blossoming love affair).

I guess I don't know if you can go back and do edits. Ignore me if you can't, it was just really jarring when things change later.

Riding weather is almost here. Anxiously waiting for the next chapter!!!

Actually you promised "on the ashes of your ancestors" to get chapter six in by the first of the year I believe. Those were the ashes that called and are pissed.

And how can Chloe write better

Than facing fearful odds

For the ashes of her fathers

And the temples of her gods

Then spake out brave Chloe

The writer of this ode

9k words are done now

But my brain is overload

Soon you will be happy

A readers demand met

Another chapter written

And yet you'll say, and yet

More Chinese Takeout needed

Please write anothe screed

One chapter then another

To satisfy that need

Okay okay that was awful and Macaulay is turning in his grave but it's coming....

I wish I could give 5 stars for your comment. Thanks 😄

Ms. Tzang,thanks for the gift of this tale. I love this story - you've got me riveted to the screen. I'll be re-reading this and awaiting the new chapters. :)

I'm a rice-rider, when with my lady wife, and a Euro when alone - so this story resonates with me. I really like that the sex is just one element of the story - it's the difference between a good erotic movie than a porn flick. Excellent work! :)

Dear ms Tzang,

I love your stories. Chinese Takeout is in my top 5 of erotic stories.

With: Aftermath by Al Steiner; Stacy's senior year by Parker; Histoire d' O by Pauline Reage; Blizzard & the Night of Firsts by the last high.

Please finish the story.

Thank you for the great writing.

On getting published 👏👏 (see her bio)

Commiserations to her Lit readers who are waiting for more of this story

It’s a coin toss on whether Winds of Winter or the next chapter of Chinese Takeout arrives first 🤦🏻‍♂️

My wife is Chinese and currently over there on an extended trip with our young son visiting and caring for her mother.

Out of boredom, I spent some serious time reading Lit stories, and well also the lack of a real flesh and blood wife.....so I came upon your work earlier this spring. Chinese Eyes completely sold me. And BTW I bought your book. Please get the next one out soon - I know you will sell at least one copy!

Anyway, love this story. Like others have noted you do not write the "hi! can you please fuck me" (words of a barely legal beauty with a perfect figure and great tits) who approached this 70 something on the beach. Those do serve a certain purpose, but as literature are sorely wanting. Also not very realistic.

I am currently writing my first story. A piece for a friend that will never otherwise see the light of day so I think I have a modicum of empathy for you as an author. Writing is fun, but not as much as reading. Just hard work sometimes.

But for the love of all us out here, please get this done. We all need to know what happens with the parents, how does the sister help, do the bikers defeat the tong.....

Just please hurry. I am already into my sunset years and would really like to find out before passing to that next place. There may not be access to Literotica there.

Hongye

(don't let the name fool you. just another white guy captivated by those Chinese Eyes)

Jay-Lin is getting awful horny! Time to write on this again.

I’m 3 miles from Langlitz, you studied up on leatherwork.

I’m digging you making Blue wait for his cock. Love your stories!

Finding this a great story that I find engaging regardless of the erotic contect

It has been a LONG day spell, Dutch

Is almost over. Planned out my writing schedule for 2019 and the first two months of the year will see two more chapters of Chinese Takeout.

More chapters of the Tale of Baby Blue! You are a very talented writer. Please keep us entertained.

Will be expectantly waiting for more chapters. Great story by a great writer, I felt as if I was there with you.

Because I was getting depressed when i realized there were no more chapters.

Your writing is captivating and this story has me hooked. Excellent work.

It's been so long. Can hardly wait for this week to go by. The real Roundout must be glad too.