All Comments on 'Vault Ch. 01'

I don't think the pills need to be a factor. He's got a lot of baby bumps to make to help continue the human race. That poor boy is already swimming in the estrogen ocean with a ton of female fertility. Mommy included. Waiting anxiously for the next one. Hopefully a tad longer. Good job. 5☆

Great start cant wait for more 👏😋

The next part will be available tomorrow, and there's a scene that you all are waiting for, hehe.

Calm the F down!

Go back and outline a story.

This is so stream of unconsciousness as to be impossible to follow.

Please stop and rethinky

Even ChatGPT would do better than this.

It's not the people who expect a certain level of entertainment and fail to find it in your "writing" who are cock blocking. It's you and people like you. You fill up the site with junk postings that make it time consuming to find actual writing that's worth reading.

Follow your own advice. Stop trading up the place and let those of us with standards fund things worth reading.

Do not rush it! And please take all the time you need for the next part!

People forget that they are reading free erotica and complain as if they are paying money to the authors to do better. Give me one reason why I should follow your advice? You're on the wrong site, dummy. Go watch YouTube. If you're looking for quality writing, then you're in the wrong place.

Got about half way through reading this . . . And fell asleep.

Even at 75, I erct faster story development than this

Nice start, keep at it! If I had one critique it would just be that with an ensemble of characters like this, you might consider longer chapters so we get to know everyone. Of course this might happen over the course of multiple chapters :-)

A bit of a jump from part 1, whatever happened to Nicole's dad, brother, and the woman?

Then, where is Michael's father now?

"Free" is a term you're obviously not very familiar with. You're making us "spend" time on useless garbage "spending" effort to find something worth reading.

To you, that sounds free? You call me a dummy because my standards exceed yours. That's the epitomy of stupidity.

I'll just start giving every submission you make 1 star and let you Wonder why. I'm quite sure your mental defects will prevent you from ever realize you're wasting your time here

I'm not wasting my time. I write because I enjoy it, and I share here to talk about my fantasy. You're the very reason that I share my story. Did I ever say I'm a good writer or being proud of it? All I care about is my fantasy and the readers who like it. If you had read my first story, then you wouldn't even bother to comment like that. My first story didn't even get published because of bad writing, and the one that did get published was super awful to read, but it became the most favorite because of its idea. People still want more episodes of that series. Though you won't find my first story writing due to updates when my writing improved a little. Anyway, readers who know me from the start know I improved a lot.

A bit of a jump from part 1, whatever happened to Nicole's dad, brother, and the woman? Then, where is Michael's father now?

They are dead. What do you think happened outside? It was a nuclear apocalypse.

Amazing how people are complaining about this, some just not able to keep the "Genie in the bottle" long enough to wait on the plot unfolding.

Ignore them, keep going! Loving it so far.