All Comments on 'Finally We Meet'

It's repetitive and not checked for and grammatical structure, making it slightly more difficult to read. The thoughts are convoluted and you seem to have no clear idea of where the story is progressing to. Also, the outfit the female character is wearing is not sexy but little girl-ish. A grown woman should not be acting like a small child. There is no physical description of the male character either.

Try keeping every sentence no longer than 10 words.