Swipe to see who's online now!
- Erotic Poetry
- Loving Waves
- Comments
All Comments on 'Loving Waves'
by pelegrino
Sort by:
- 2 Comments
Ashesh9over 9 years agoPel , just imagine what your Poem would have been if you had replced the "a" with an
"I" in your Header !!??
Senna Jawaabout 9 years agoLet stanzas 2-4 be 1-3 :-)
Stanzas 2-4 are very nice, they make a total poem. Stanza 1 should be removed, it spoils the poem, it is a bad eyesore, with its unnecessary political and scientific jargon plus semi-joking and semi cliched "heart". No need for all these.
You may still do something about line "And what else there’s to reach". It has no content, be it in general or poetically (I hope you are not counting on any graphic interpretation of phrase "to reach", it would cheapen your poem).
PS. I don't understand the other comment when it talks about "a" and "I".
Our Comments Policy is available in the Lit FAQ
Post as:
Swipe to see more cams!
