All Comments on 'A New Girl'

This is an excellent read.

You have this character getting into all manner of sexy situations. Excellent pace and timing. Well worded.

Keep writing for the ones who enjoy reading you.

Nicely written. I picked up on the obvious chemistry between Shae and Tara pretty early on. I loved them together, even before they were together. And I hope the arrival of the new girl at the end of the story didn't do anything to their relationship ... ~ L

A well written piece that develops the characters realistically and excels at moving through Shea's rollercoaster year.

The biggest issue though is the multiple english fragments that broke immersion in the story. I refer to the mixing up of homophones like 'waste' and 'waist', the pronouns 'his' and 'her', and changing verb tenses in the same sentence. ("We did a good deal of joking and we played video games, we make prank phone calls, and we talked.")

The vast majority of the story had me engrossed in the action, with the exception of the half dozen grammer and odd spelling errors. A well rounded story with only one place to improve. Congratulations.

long ... long! But there is no line I regret. All the characters are so very believable (including Crystal), the love was really sweet, and the group sex came so naturally directly from the girls' souls. And so nice that Tara's first orgasm was made by herself!

Very good work.

YKN, that was absolutely incredible. I've never read anything remotely like it and I loved it. It's all so believable too. Brilliant work. Do keep on writing. Oh, and Thank you.

Fantastic story! And, feel I well, the end of it is quite a beggining of a next story? I would love if you write a sequel. But if not, everything else in this kind of lesbian story as A New Girl and Scarlett's Challange is welcomed by me.

Great character development, great story line, incredible outcomes! Long but extremely worth it! Wow!

Really enjoyed your work on this story! The length was excellent and the characters were well defined.

Here is a possible new idea for you.

News report on a woman who was doing some high school gang bangs while her husband was on his monthly Army Reserve weekends. A female was also HS involved. Cell phone video of Mother and her HS plamates was taken by one and decemenated by a male student who had done her alone but was not in the gang bang. Hurdle will be describing the feelings of anguish which, in my opinion, drove the video forwarding young man to do it. Maybe love was not returned as he thought it should be, or perhaps he wanted her for his own plans and did not enjoy having the party thrown in his facwe by someone he introduced Married woman to.

Great work! I've read hundreds of Literotica stories and yours stands out as completely fresh. Perfect length, seamless flow, vivid eroticism and heartfelt emotions. You've seperated yourself from the used-up ideas and unimaginative sex of Literotica's toplist and accomplished something really special here. 5 stars!

PS this is my first comment on the site :P

I'd like to say this was a good story, well written, and very sexy as hell.I'd really like to see an encore piece concerning Tara, and Shae, Julie and Misty and the new girl across the street cumming home for Winter break and see what developes.Use your imagination, as I'm sure you can cum up with something for us here in Literotica Land! Thanks again for a good read!

I love, love, loved this story!! It was so sexy and very well written. I would so love to have you write a sequel to this involving the girl next door and Shae and her friends. I must say you are an amazing writer and make the stories you write believable and they are just so hot. I was very tired of the pointless smut on here that is less than a page long and I found some great stories here! Yours. Keep writing you are great:)

I just have to agree with the others,it was great and need to have a follow up storyline with Shae breaking in a new girl...yummy!

must...have...sequel!

I really enjoy your stories, but you really need to work on your editing. The mistakes

you miss are very annoying.

I'm a straight male and I gotta say this story makes me feel good, and not just in places below the waist...

Your stories are among those I try to save for when I have some extra time. Sure, they may be longer than some, but they are full of character development, honest struggles within relationships, hard choices for the best reasons, and, of course, great sex scenes. You let us into the thoughts and feelings of your characters with smooth narration and believable dialogue.

Suggestions for stores.... I'll have to get back to you on that. I loved this story and do not feel any urgency to read another tonight.

Thanks for sharing your talents with us.

I love this so much!

That was SO good! I loved that it just wasn't all flat out sex. It had character development, a good plot, and delicious scenes. ;) I didn't realize how long it was, read half of it one night, and HAD to finish the rest the next night. The only criticism I would leave is editing with some typos. Besides that, thank you!

That was on hell of a heartwarming storyline laced with erotic and surprising twists and turns to keep me enticed! The storyline and character development was outstanding... with truly believable characters that were engaging in so many ways.

I've read this story several times, it's my favorite ever

your stories are the best!! there not just slutty right to the sex stories.the story lines are incredable to say the least. not only do they turn me and my gf on but we get sucked into the story to see whats ganna happen next. these should be in a published book. keep up the fantastic work!!!!!!!!!!!

I love how you made what could have been just another sex story into something beautiful.

As I've come too expect from your creative mind another satisfying piece of writing

5🌟

Hii ykn

I loved the storie it was nice and sometimes sad

With very strong emotions in it (i May have cried)

But when i got to the part that 4 of them wer gonna have sex i kinda wanted to stop reading

To me it seemed really wrong because sex was the reason they got seperated and somehow magically they could be with the 4 of them together

Anyways do keep up the good work im only an opinion dont Let this get to you

If i wasnt clear, youre a great writer so goodluck with future stories

Just keeps going these well thought out and we'll written stories....

This was a wonderful story, and I really liked the characterization. The personalities were strong and interesting, and that was what really made this so good for me. Though the hate sex scene with Misty definitely contributed too, because that was crazy hot.

Very well written with great character development. You are very talented and really captured the angst and cruelty of high school years. Thank you so much for sharing this.

I think it was a little too long, but I read most of it and it was alright

Amazing story with exceptionally well described characters..

Smoking hot sex scenes.

I'm certainly going to read more of your stories.

Keep up the great work!

Another wonderful piece of writing....

Really highlights the feelings and trials of teens struggling with new identities when life forces a change in their familiar circumstances..

I remember the feeling well, when I moved schools....

Affectionately and with gratitude

Corinne x

A wonderfully entertaining story. One of the best. I look forward to reading your other stories!

Loved it!!!

So sweet!

The story was actually so good that the very few minor errors are quite irrelevant, they didn't spoil it one little bit.

When an author gets me feeling the characters, then they've got it right. And you did.

Well done.

Thanks

Really liked this story as it developed slowly but when the sex entered, you described the events superbly. I usually don't rate higher then a 4 however, I have now read several of your stories and had to rate each one a 5. I believe each is that well written and the story line, although a fantasy, could be very real. Great job and keep writing the girl/girl theme stories. Keep up the great work.

Just stumbled upon this after reading one of your newer stories. Really hot. Nicely balanced, and lots of great fantasies all connected together. Looking forward to more of your lesbian fare...

Great story as always. Thank you!

Loved this story!

Wonderful character development, sensitivity, and insanely good slow burn, edging, plot twists, emotional highs and lows and just some damn fine sex scenes - plenty enough to soak a couple pair of panties were I wearing any...

Was disappointed in the ending however. Felt you kinda threw Tara under the bus or out with the trash and simply dismissed her and Shae’s self discovery journeys culmination in their beautiful new relationship and promising bright future together.

All said I love your writing

Yummy great read

hmmmm I guess the love for Tara was not as strong after so short of time... so sad!

A little disappointed by the wandering eye at the end. Seems like Tara deserved her devotion. Not at all sure how that served the plot in any way given it was the literal last two sentences. Still a 5/5