All Comments on 'A Rude Awakening Ch. 1'

You may want to trim your paragraphs, as big bulky paragraphs are a lot for some. Easier in this online context to simplify things a bit. ^_^

And I like your writing, although I do think you need to give the characters (particularly the male protagonist) more of a background. Why is he there? What does he hope to accomplish? Why/how did he manage to get her friends to participate in his plans? .. etc. It all came out of left field, so to speak. The dialogue was also pretty run of the mill...or maybe I've just been reading too much bdsm lately? *chuckle*

Keep up the good work, though! <3