All Comments on 'Catering the Beach Photo Shoot'

Starting off ok but there are errors in it which are annoying

Not clear what the point of the story was. It's related as a casual anecdote, with little real eroticism.

I am hastily working on the next chapter. Thanks for the comments. I will make sure to release a corrected form as well. Any suggestions for the next chapter?

I am hastily working on the next chapter. Thanks for the comments. I will make sure to release a corrected form as well. Any suggestions for the next chapter?

doesn't go anywhere, do anything

The plot was very interesting. It has so many directions in which it can go. Erotic development of the college age prevously sheltered girl can lead to "firsttime" "romance" "erotic adventures", etc. Will check in for future adventures.

Interesting story with plenty of places to go. A number of annoying spelling mistakes. Apart from that, it is worth a next chapter.

Ok, for a pretty good story, at least as a first chapter leading to more, there were too many negative reviews. As far as I'm concerned, negative feedback without useful suggestions is worthless. There may be some corrections needed, but if so, they didn't bother me and I usually notice such things. I thought the story was a great start at building what could be a very good erotic story with several chapters, starting at the beach, going to college, etc... I hope you will be writing more soon!

I'm intrigued with where you will take it. Bear in mind that most readers are probably hoping for at least one orgasm per chapter, or they will lose the mood before you can post the sequel. If you remember that, you will probably have far fewer negative comments. :)

I think you did a great job of setting up what could possibly be and excellent long-term story with quite a few chapters developing the job with Mack, a burgeoning friendship with Jennifer, etc. Keep writing and don't let the critics bug you, you've got some talent and could do quite well with only a little editing....Good on ya!!

Nice third point story of how the world works. A massive plus bikinis get mentioned.