Darcy, Come Home & Find a Bride

"Good girl Lenora. As I said in the interview, I'm required to give 30 days' notice. Will be in touch."

* * *

Lenora introduced Darcy who with his flaming hair, light green polo and dark green pants and brown shoes cut quite a dashing figure.

"Hi, I'm here to work and work the butts off you lot so I don't expect to make friends in here," Darcy said to his gathered personnel. " If I do that will be a bonus."

He put down his bags and portfolio case.

"I can see by some of your disgruntled looks you are still sore that the two departments were merged. It wasn't my idea but I'm going to make the merger work. I don't know how you guys have worked in the past but this is a new ball game. We have two main rules: You get to work on time and you don't leave until you've finished what was expected of you on that day. In the main I leave it to you to decide what was expected of you and how to manage your time and access to our resources."

The looks Darcy received were mainly grim.

"Oh, almost forget. Another rule: No sex on desktops. The floor is quite okay."

The looks changed to puzzlement or amusement and there were a few sniggers.

"I've had no advertising experience. I've told you that so I know you know that. Genuine tips and offers of assistance will be appreciated. You and you, please rip down that trash on that notice board."

"But they are management edicts, workplace regulations, and reports from the chairman," said a woman, hesitating while the guy began ripping.

"This is the electronic age babe; in this department we read only what appears on-screen. To hell with the regulators and anyone can see that's a fire alarm without having an explanatory notice beneath it. Now who's our Girl Friday?"

A short, bright-faced young woman with a twisted foot stepped forward.

"Who fucked up your foot dear? If it's someone in here I'll kill them."

Everyone looked startled and the victim turned pale. "I was born like this Mr Farnsworth."

"Call me Darcy pet. My mother called me Darcy because she has red hair. I'm Darcy to everyone. What's you name Pet."

"Tammy."

"Nice name. Please take the top photo from my folio and pin it at the top right of that board. That photo stays there in that king position until one of you photographers takes a better shot as judged by our Monday morning conference. Diverting for a second, we leave here at 4:00 on Fridays for a bar where everyone is required to stay for one hour's conviviality. You film guys can have a single frame shot printed off for this board. By the end of this week I want to see an example of every cameraman's best work on this board. Tammy please attach the contributor's name= to each photo."

There were gasps as Tammy held up Darcy's photo.

"I took that in northern India in a deep ravine. An upriver dam and burst and we had warning the giant wave would pass at that point in twenty minutes and would probably surged to 30ft about normal height in the ravine. An electricity line repair guy was standing on the bridge, waiting to see the wall of water. He was wearing one of those jackets they use to rope themselves to a pole and leaned back to work on the insulators above their heads. I borrowed that and also borrowed a rope off him and he had a small can of orange paint on the truck. I called for four strong guys to lower me down and pull me back up. It worked but I said they'd have to pull me up faster when I signaled. They gave me bad-teeth smiles and said they understood, that I would signal at the very last second."

"Well I painted a cross on the shirt of each of those guys and said I would pay each guy twenty bucks in our money for pulling me up fast. I then gave the linesman the paint and told him to lock it away. By then the clever guys knew if they didn't pull me up fast enough they each wouldn't get their 870 Indian rupees. So with five minutes to go I was lowered and the linesman had another rope on one of my legs and stood a little way off to stop me spinning. Local police cleared almost everyone else off the very high bridge. I heard the water before it saw it. It swept around the bend, causing more devastation and amid the muddy brown water where remains of houses, bridges, trees, livestock and human corpses. I wanted to get right down in the path of the flow to get the most dramatic shot."

"The guys got their payment and I gave the linesman his safety jacket back plus 2000 rupees. I made a tidy profit though, selling that film to an Indian news agency for worldwide distribution for the equivalent of 5000 US bucks. I got wet and my leg badly bruised when hit by a log. I'm only doing this to show I can take photos and to make you guys want to work your position on that board. On Friday morning we will put place numbers on each photo, starting with mine, as Number 1 and I will remove my photo on week two. For week five we'll switch to the photograph of an object to test the skill and creativity of us all. The subject will be a solitary wood match against or amid any setting but the match must have dominance. Anything goes."

That released a real buzz of brief conversation before Darcy said back to work. He spent the morning reading office manuals and reports and in the afternoon looked over profiles with Lenora of in-house women who might be suitable as his PA.

"Where are the male candidates?"

"I didn't wish to waste your time presenting their profiles."

"Why aren't one of your staff doing this with me?"

"I wanted to be with you a little, to have you looking at me with carnal interest. I'm five years older than you and my husband is twelve years older than me. I was thinking a bouncy time with you say once a month could keep me in good shape sexually."

"Why not?"

"Oooh, thank you. Now here she is, single, well qualified, slightly younger than you with legs that go right up to her...well, very long legs indeed. She is rather sweet."

"No thanks. In the block of my rented apartment are dozens of long, leggy women, including quite a number of airline flight attendants. My cup will runneth over if that's what I want. No, I'll have Ida Smith."

"But she's fifty-five with adult children?"

"So? Is she set in her ways?"

"No, she's actually very competent and flexible."

"Then please fetch her and if she likes me she is my choice."

Mrs Smith liked Darcy, obviously, speaking to him warmly and asking where his parents lived. When she left Darcy said, "Please arrange her transfer."

Mrs Smith joined the department two days later.

Lenora had a lot of hair around her slit and Darcy said, "Tut-tut."

She giggled. They were both a little drunk.

"May I trim it before we get started?"

"Yes but Frank is going to have a fit."

"Go on; it's unlikely he'll notice."

With that job done Darcy got on with the job she wanted from him: to fuck her athletically. Within an hour she was hoarse from screaming. She had to stay the night because she was truly fucked. She did call Frank to say she's met an old friend and apologized for being late calling. He said she sounded drunk and she said she was. Frank said he wanted her to stay because she sounded in no condition to drive. Lenora dropped down beside Darcy to find he was already asleep, astonished she'd not been asked by her husband who was the friend.

Darcy arrived at work next day feeling a little worse for the wear, took a call from managing partner Robert Twill and felt a whole lot worse. Gallery museum Mrs St Leger wanted to see them at 10:30 'to look your new chappie over'. Robert said the old bitch was English.

Darcy's female staff had been helpful, two of them coming to him and explaining earnestly that it was politically incorrect to call females babes or for that matter bimbos even if the speaker was the boss. He thanked them gravely and committed political infamy by staring at their swinging asses and seamed-stocking legs as they walked away. An older woman from the darkroom whispered that he should stop calling Tammy 'Pet;' because that could be misconstrued to mean he was rejecting the given name of a physically handicapped employee.

Darcy felt steam coming out of the back of his shirt but said politely, "Thank you Janice."

In five days on the job no one had offered him any worthwhile tip or constructive advice. That annoyed him. Workers were so fucking pathetic.

"Here dear," said Mrs Smith with political incorrectness. "Drink this and you'll see a new world."

He drank it and felt a weight beginning to lift (as Mrs Smith took her hand off his shoulder) and his eyes watered but that was clearing, as were a gag and two hearty coughs.

"What was that mix?"

"Milk of magnesia, four ground aspirin, a teaspoon of Lea & Perrins Worchester Sauce, one egg yolk and a quarter of a cup of brandy."

"I thought I was feeling worse; now I don't know."

"Give it ten minutes and you'll be chasing me around the office."

"But I have excellent eyesight."

"Saucy hunk," smiled Mrs Smith, swaying her mass.

Ten minutes later Darcy was wondering if he was feeling better when Irene Kennedy, who possessed the best legs in the entire agency of some one hundred and twenty females bent over to pull something from a filing cabinet. Darcy's dick snapped to attention but unfortunately it was bent over in his briefs, causing him agony. He was snorting, attempting to deal with it when Irene raced in.

"Can I help? I saw you were in trouble. Oh god do you have cramp of the penis? Here let my help you. Darcy tried to wave her away but only succeeded in sending his coffee over his computer keyboard.

"Oh fuck," he groaned.

"You won't be doing any of that with cramp consuming this thing," she said, oozing sympathy. She had him unzipped and her hand inside his briefs before Darcy had time to push her away.

"Oh God, it's not right one man can have so much. You are twice as big as Alec. I don't want to rub it in case..."

"Thanks Irene. This is terribly embarrassing. Please go."

"Yes of course. Perhaps you can thank me by taking me to a bar a little away from here one evening."

When recovered Darcy toweled up the coffee and called the fascinated Mrs Smith, who'd been watching the carry-on through her window. He asked for a new keyboard from supplies.

As he was leaving for the meeting Mrs Smith said, "I'd never thought Irene would have the courage to pull out the boss's dick during office hours when anyone passing would have spotted her obscene behavior."

"Irene was doing me a favor."

"I bet."

Darcy thought of fleeing but had a better idea. "Mrs Smith, what you gave me to drink has improved my health no end and I think the fumes are a powerful aphrodisiac and attracted poor Irene who was powerless to resist."

"Blatant sexual misconduct in the office is one thing Darcy and I am prepared to overlook it, but lying to me is something I cannot stomach. I..."

Darcy fled.

CHAPTER 4

Bonnie was desperately unhappy. Her mother was practically consuming her life. Bonnie was permitted to leave for work at 6:45 and was expected to by home by 3:30 or else call to explain the delay. On Saturday she was expected to do the washing and clean the house all morning and from noon she was permitted to go out till midnight. On Sunday she had to take her mother in her wheelchair to church. In the afternoon her mother's friends visited or she visited friends and Bonnie had to accompany her. Her mother cooked all the meals and washed up, refusing assistance, because she liked having something to do. She had bouts of depression but had medication to keep it under reasonable control. Bonnie had Sunday evenings off to do what she wished. Every day or two she had to promise she'd 'never see that awful man again', the awful man being Bonnie's darling. She was in email contact with Kevin and Louise and they kept her informed about Darcy who returned to Chicago occasionally.

Bonnie was terrified her virtual imprisonment could last for years, perhaps twenty years. To get he mind off her despair she began studying on-line and found she had the capacity to take three advance diplomas to add to her degree in nursing. She believed that would give her sufficient to gain a Masters in Science degree in nursing. It was tempting to email Darcy but she wanted to free him from his attachment to her to allow him to find love elsewhere. She horrified herself by occasionally planning her own freedom by devising ways to kill her mother. She knew she couldn't do that any more that she could walk away from her mother and thus provoke his mother into killing herself as she'd threatened. Her mother went for a walk on fine afternoons. Perhaps she might get knocked down by a vehicle and killed? It surprised Bonnie that thought didn't heap guilt on her. Fortunately working at the hospital and studying most nights brought her peace of mind and made more sense of her life.

* * *

The hawked-nosed woman who smelt of lavender had an oil painting on her office wall that Darcy guessed would have a value in excess of $2 million. She poured from the teapot. As the milk went in Robert and Darcy had the look of men thinking they were being served poison.

"Is that Twinings tea Mrs St Leger?"

"Oh very good Mr Farnsworth."

"Early Grey I should think, my mother drinks it."

"And you don't?"

"No, but I shall be polite."

"You are an honest gentleman. She called out, "Mary, two coffees for the gentlemen please."

"I-I'll try and hope to like it."

Mrs St Leger ignored Robert's insincere late initiative.

"What can you gentlemen tell me about my painting."

Robert said confidentially, "It's an oil."

"Oh very good. And what else?"

The heavy frame is fine quality."

"And you Mr Farnsworth?"

"I recognize it so it's not a test Mrs St Leger."

"Advertising executives are sneaky devils Mr Farnsworth. They don't even trust each other. Detail please."

"Christine Brighouse, Baltimore, 1877-1930. She completed it 1927 and it is titled, A Snow Cover Pony Pasture. The pony was long dead and it was her pony pasture when she was a girl. She'd purchased her old home in 1923 and lived there in summers. The painting went on a touring exhibition and then disappeared into a private collection. Did your late father purchase it?"

"Oh, very clever and almost correct. The only purchaser was my maternal grandfather and it has passed down in the family. I, not the museum, own it. How did you know so much about it?"

"We had a fundraising night at the university -- students against tutors. The tutors had to donated one hundred dollars for each painting they failed to recognize. We students paid five dollars and were taken into debt. Our tutors were too clever for us but we got $100 credit each off each of them for failing to recognize it. My interest grew in it and I used Miss Brighouse as my American painter to study."

"So you know what killed her?"

"Yes, riding a kid's pony as a bit of a giggle. She fell off and struck her head on a post. I studied other American painters after that, looking for other tragic deaths and found them."

After finishing tea and coffee Mrs St Leger escorted the men through some of the gallery and as they were leaving she said, "Mr Twill, if I request Mr Farnsworth to be in charge of our account totally do you have a problem with that?"

"No ma'am."

"Then I shall stay with your agency. Please personally supervise that he does not fail me. Good morning gentlemen."

On the way back to the office Robert said, "You clinched that by recognizing the painting but I'm astonished your memory recall was so clear."

"I cheated. I looked in our files and found a brochure we produced for the museum. There was a wide-angle photo of Mrs St Leger at her desk and on the left I could see half of that painting and recognized it. I looked up my study notes on the web in the archives of my university and refreshed my memory on that artist, expecting to be asked by Mrs St Leger about that painting."

Robert grinned. "We need more people like you in our company.

* * *

Irene Kennedy twice hinted at the drink Darcy owed her for attending to him when he suffered what she called 'penis cramp,' so one Friday night he invited her to a bar for a drink. They met at a quiet bar out of the city center and had an enjoyable time. It turned out Irene wasn't married but may as well have been because she'd lived with the guy for nine years.

Just as they were leaving Darcy invited her to his apartment but she declined and declined his offer to take her to a hotel. She still looked interested though. He took her arm as they walked out through the backdoor to their cars and he said, a little awkwardly, "Then this is it?"

"I don't mind if you kiss me."

They merged and kissed and Darcy soon had her moaning, so assumed she was ready for it. He leaned her against her car, still kissing her and as he felt down over her belly she began tonguing him for the first time and he felt her legs open. He still wasn't totally confidence but was motivated where hearing, "Push it into me."

As Darcy unzipped she pulled her dress up high.

"No knickers," he whispered.

"They're in my handbag. I removed them in the restroom. I was hoping I'd sample your long fat cock tonight Darcy but I won't make a habit of it."

"That's fine."

"Wait," she said, as she pushed him away so she could get clear of the car. She sat on her heels and sucked him till he was wet and then returned to her original position. She told him she was on the pill.

They were under a light, not caring, and both looked down as Darcy fed some of his eager cock in, but it was hard going. Irene lifted her right leg up and out. Darcy caught that leg in the crook of his arm and they were away, his length sliding into her virtually all the way in one smooth forward push.

"I'm not small am I?"

"It's a pleasure not to have to grunt my way in."

"You are so kind."

Darcy found she was surprisingly good moving her body and assisting to minimize discomfort and catching his rhythm well in her forward presses. From that he assumed it was not the first time she'd been fucked standing up. They ignored two couples arriving and laughing friendly enough as they went by. One of the woman in a slurred voice saying, 'Give him one for me."

Finally Irene stiffened and she expelled breath and sucked air back in rather noisily and then Darcy felt her release run over his balls and down the inside of his left thigh.

"Bang it into me -- I don't want it over my clothes," she said. Darcy obliged and pumped and pumped quite a little flood of semen deep into it.

"God, if we did this often we could become really good," she sighed and kissed him deeply before taking her panties from her handbag and cleaning herself.

Darcy opened his trunk and emerged with two hand towels, passing Irene one. "I never know, when, with whom and where I'm going to conduct my next round of sexual activity so I travel prepared," he grinned.

Irene stooped to look at her watch. "It's not too late. Want to do me doggie over my trunk -- do you have a rug?" Darcy pulled out a rug from his trunk.

Darcy took his role at the agency very seriously, wanting to establish and grow a reputation. So he pushed for emphasis in outdoor and studio filming and photography on 'creativity, composition and clarity,' earning a nickname for himself of CCC Darcy. He did all the camerawork for the museum's new brochure and thus quietly earned the respect of his team because this was Darcy in action commercially rather than performing a one-off wonder feat in India taking a huge risk that could have killed him.

That brochure led to unexpected focus on Darcy. The star of the current TV series hit 'Texan Women Don't Back Off ' Cleo Jones appeared on a TV 'Entertainment This Week' show and was asked what she hated most and the reply was "Forgetting my mom's birthday...she turns fifty this year." The interviewer said send her a present now and Cleo replied her father was wealthy so her mom had everything. The interviewer said, well send her a lovely photo of yourself. Darcy who was watching noticed Cleo's eyes widen so picked up his phone and called the independent film company who made the show Texan Women Don't Back Off and was told to call back in the morning. He did and next afternoon was at the studio talking to the assistant director of the show.