All Comments on 'Divorce and Future - Passed'

Another fun read, I'm enjoying the bit of sci-fi that you're adding to the stories. Keep up the good work.

This story is amazing! While maybe not the best, no one is better at writing a great story.

This story is a sad one for me because it marks the end of an era. As it appears right now, this story will be the last one edited by Mikothebaby. As editors go she will be not just difficult but probably impossible to replace because she was more than just an editor she was a friend. She was also extremely great at what she does and incredibly fast. In fact with my output it may actually take two or more people to fill in for what she did. I've contacted a couple of people already but as of this moment I'm looking for another editor to work with. If anyone is interested, please let me know. So thanks to Mikothebaby for everything she did to get me this far. I wish her well and look forward to jealously reading her future collaborations with other writers. SS06.

Lift a bit from Dicken's 'A Christmas Carol', a litttle from Asimov's 'I Robot" and you have a jim-dandy Sci-Fi story. A humorous Sci-Fi story.

So why is it in LW's - to get a wider readership? By now I would think your name would attract enough readers that you don't need to be misleading about the nature of the story!

That had to be ur best ever story u have written

Naturaly 5 stars for a good reconcilation story.

1. Many stories in the LW hub a very good attension sign for young male readers: Do not be DUMB to be young husband and a secret DNA test can solve many problems in the future or the results can strenghten the marriage. Here was the reverse problem, because the husband thought the baby is not him, but he was wrong. DNA,DNA, DNA...........

2. I think there is a factor sometime children will be in such situation wich is a without loving background after divorce or during marriage and these situations could couse very dangerouse future for the near society or for the mankind.

2.1. Adolf Hitler thought himself he was bastard (his father was a cruel parent).

2.2. Herman Goering was son of a willing cuckold husband and the loverboy lived together with the family...........

3. There are romantic and erotic fembot and robot stories from DB_Story on ASSTR and from expresso42 "Oceania" on SOL (storiesonline.net).

Not your usual fare, but a good read. The sci-fi thing was a real kick for me, and the romance angle sealed the deal.

Another winner Stang. You and Miko keep 'em coming!

Since I am a fan of all SciFi and fantasy, I naturally think this is one of your best. For future reference, please ignore anyone who says your stories are too long. Longer is better, it allows better development of the characters and story line.

While I like the premise and am a big sci fi fan from way back, the timeline has problems. Based about 40 years in the future you would not have the opportunity to see the genetic results stated here. Most of the people at the mall would be representative of the daughters generation so the there would still be racial diversity clearly evident in the looks of the general population. The writing was as good as we have come to expect and the story is somewhat believable. I have problems with a ‘rational’ person holding a victim responsible for their rape. This is especially true where the ‘victim’ did so much to attempt to avoid the problem. The only problem I have with her victim status is that she continued to work with the SOB to start with.

Just my thoughts.

Excellent. This comic book geek is now moving you into his top 3 authors on this site. And the story wasn't bad either.

sadden me. The story brought a tear to my eye. Worse yet I could only give it *****. Finally your post that your editor of fame and longevity was leaving you. Maybe there is a loving wves story in that. This was what some call a true loving wives story. Once explain to this dumb reader, who would have kick her to the curb, just as our hero/jerk did. Sarah showed all the qualities we could want in a mate. She only made one mistake and that out of a sense of honour. She should have waited until divorced and then proven that Jake was his son. But that would have changed the story. This is not your best work, it is still better than almost everything else written by everyone else. There are few that can compete with your vision. Who knows maybe your editor will see the error of her ways. It is a hope to be wishes for.

ToS2/1Tm

Yet another interesting and original tale ... I don't know where you find the time to be so prolific ! I can't for the life of me understand why anyone can be so obsessed with any modern car that still has a 1950's style live rear axel either ! But these things I can live without understanding.

Looking forward to your next effort.

Wow, certainly not your usual Loving Wives story. Like someone else said, it has a bit of everything. A Christmas Carol, with warnings about the future, I Robot, with the robots taking over, and even Wall-E, with the fat incompetent future humans, heh.

It actually didn't really read like an LW story. Much more sci fi.

I do have a nitpick, but a very minor one, depending on how big of an impact this future Tina had on Jake (like, total perspective change revelation). Why doesn't Jake do a DNA test on Jake Jr, after he knows everything? To verify future Tina's statements with hard facts? OK, given the sci fi setting, and all the proof she had given him of future tech, he'd probably believe ANYTHING she said. Still....It'd give him peace of mind.

I wish Stang had put the actual "confession" by Sarah in the story, because that would've made some things more clear. Jake mistakenly believes Sarah slept with her boss willingly, instead of being drugged and raped. Did Sarah ever tell him that at the initial confession? Did he (not) believe her? Did Jake throw her out before she could tell him? Or did she never mention it at all? Because that is THE gamebreaker, it changes everything.

If Sarah HAD tried to tell him, and he ignored or disbelieved it, Jake is a bigger asshole than I thought. If Sarah had NOT told him, but led him to believe she had willingly cheated, then Jake's anger at her "cheating" was NOT misplaced.

As far as I can tell with this story, apparently Sarah had NOT told him because Jake would never believe it was rape.

"If she was a real woman, she never would have let herself get in a position where someone could take advantage of her."

Like Tina said, he's got a real stick up his ass. Don't think I would've liked the old Jake, with his selfrighteousness, and blaming rape victims...

Would Jake have divorced Sarah if he had known she was raped? In this "timeline" Jake immediately goes back to Sarah, once Tina tells him that it was rape. Would the Jake from the past, right after Sarah's confession, have done that as well, if he had known?

(Tina knows it doesn't work with "before-the-rape" Jake, but after? Who knows?)

Anyway, good story.

Quite another story than we're used from SS6 but, although the time travelling plot is off course quite unbelievable, it was – per usual - well written. It's also nice to see a reconciliation and a happy ending. Because his wife in effect didn't have an affair but was actually raped.

I wonder though where the rapist went… how can he disappear into nothingness?

Also what about the time paradox… A time traveler goes to the past, and does something that would prevent him from time travel in the first place. If he does not go back in time, he does not do anything that would prevent his traveling to the past, so time travel would be possible for him. However, if he goes back in time and does something that would prevent the time travel, he will not go back in time. Thus each possibility seems to imply its own negation. With his “elder” daughter rectifying the situation she will never exist in a way as to need traveling back, so she can’t return to rectify the situation! Cause and effect!

As another commenter said, you missed the ball a bit with the genetics: no way that through normal “breeding” in 40 years we’d all look alike… that’s something that happens over a much longer period. It’s called evolution.

I’m curious too to see what the effect will be of having an other editor… Onwards to next week’s story thus!

Sorry but you lost me on the first page. I stopped reading about 3/4 down.

I have to admit that the protagonist's declaration:

"If she was a real woman, she never would have let herself get in a position where someone could take advantage of her."

Really broke up my reading for a couple of minutes... Man, he has problems!

Basically he is saying that the world has to obey his will.

But he sucked it up and recognized that she did not cheat, she was just penetrated by evil!

Change of pace from the usual stuff, I really enjoyed it - even if it was way out there.

As many have said there is alot of "Back the future"... time travel Star Trek ...scrooge references in the story. Never mind the silly obama dictator references.. I have mixed feelings about that.

But getting away from the science fiction... The store is total abject failure because there is no possible explanation ....no possible chain of events which explains WHY Sarah could not find the time to say the 9 words...

"Jake is YOUR baby and I can prove it" . The rest of the story is just contrived because with respect to how folks interacti in the year 2012... it's not realistic in any sense whatsoever.

reaclling that the PREMISE of the divorce was that it was relatively calm and peaceful one that was actually filled with some warmth and love ...and they Husband and Wife were still talking to each other... then Sarah's decision to NOT say anything about little Jake and who his real father was ...is absurd and morally reprehensible.!!

But no one says anything about that. Even worse ... how is it that Tina ...the time travelling daughter... can go through time... KNOW he truth about all the events yest says to Daddy/ Big Jake " you are the one that HAS to do something . YOU are the one at fault".

SS06...were you like drunk when you wrote this ?

The truth about Baby Jake was HIDDEN from him... So how was / this his fault?

WHY doesnt anyone over the decades ever say to Sarah the ex-wife... "hey Big Jake has the right to know about his son." If over the years SHE was racked with guilt and remorse and longing for her ex... how could she then for decades lie through Omission about who little Jake's father was?

This is not a good story

look dumbass remember bush the one who drove this country over the cliff.the one who drove us from a black into the red.a republician party that said no to everything even if it help the country.if we elect romney you will see the same as bush,depression agan.you a good writer,bad in judgement.

getting w a y o u t t h e r e........and as for anon....Oh ba mah lost me when he gave the pres of Mexico a blow job in front of Congress. He is a hell of a salesman and disaster as a president. Just another lying politician with a growing lower class constituency hoping for bigger entitlements. Good on ya' Stang...thanks for a good start to the weekend.

KEEP OUT OF POLITICS!!

Good Grief! when did a sci-fi story become a political campaign? SS06, that was an excellent story and well told. I enjoyed it thoroughly. I have no idea what the two previous comments were about, other than they manage to read their own paranoia into every story.

Oh and to the person that thinks the economy is Bush's perhaps that person should examine the changes in the laws in the mid-to-late 90's that forced/allowed/encouraged to make loans to people who up until then could not have qualified for them and in retrospect could not handle them.

maybe your op-eds should appear in the Journal or the Post with the other "Let Detroit Go Bankrupt" stories. This is a sex story site. 1 star.

STANGSTAR DICKENS

I found out, I divorced her and got revenge.

My wife cheated on me with twelve black guys and I took her back

Becuz I luvs her. Those are the basis for every LW story in the world

Two months ago people here were complaining because all of the

Stories were the same. Now he gives you something different and

All I see is this isn't an LW story or there's not enough sex. I loved

It. I've already had sex so reading ooh ahh fuk mi isn't necessary.

6 stars

But not a smart one - even though Ford didn't get bailed out by Obama like GM and Chrysler, the supply chain collapse would have forced them out of the country or out of business. I'll take my cars American made thank you very much.

In the future there won't be any divorce cause there won't be any marriages. What for, today's fems who whelp babies aren't married so why in the future? Arh, a blast of the past mixed with craziness projected into the future . . .

Not one of your better efforts.

Perhaps the editing killed it but reaching for humor, a morality play, and draping cliche plot devices all over it sank this effort to the bottom. Rule #1: don't try to please everyone - you just end up pleasing no one.

and you'd kept it so fucking sharp before and after..tight as a drum - savvy interesting read. Perfect length for me. I enjoyed it a lot, and enjoy the comments generated, thanks. 5*

To SMS for writing an original story. So sad that the LW "kill the bitch" trolls can't comprehend that.

In my comment. It should of course be ss06

While this story didn't hit my fancy, it was a good effort. I hope you may be realizing that three more pages of "amazing bits" would not have helped this story any more than it helps most of your stories.

on a tip from the future, TK U MLJ LV NV

As a proud member of the troll community I am sick and tired of you using us as a negative descriptor.

As for the story, it started out great, but you couldn't bullshit yourself out of the major flaw which is why I only gave it 3 * ... she could have just gone back and warned her mother about the food. As careful and concerned as that lady was about being drugged, she would have accepted the situation much more easily than dear ole dad did.

Also, and this is a pet peeve of mine, the world wasn't coming to an end. Humanity might have but not the world. Earth was here billions of years before us and will be here billions of years after we are gone. 21 December, people, here it comes.

A very original idea although based on another story. The LW twist made it different. It was also an interesting look at a possible future and the butterfly effect. My third point really doesn't count as bad to anyone but you Stang. I've never really cared much for Milkythebanshee as an editor anyway. she seems to bring out the worst in most writers. The story she edited for Rehnquist was his worst ever so maybe you're better off without her.

Sad day for the automotive world. Sad day for closet cucks as well since no women were burned at the stake in this story. Felt like a vain attempt to pander to the low brows but with a reconciliation thrown in, just not gonna work. I agree with the 3* guy.

this story is too short you try and that too quickly and in effect you create tale less greater than this story could be

one more thing why Tina just don't take in nothingness before he rape her mother

You are prolific and consistently interesting. You are also a gifted wordsmith. Since retirement, I have had to edit my own work. Self-editing fixes technical errors and grammar/spelling stuff, but misses the story idea help gotten from another set of eyes. I agree with your political persuasions, but considering that posting stories here (or writing for the general public in any way) is essentially a popularity contest, I recommend reigning it in or being more subtle.

Glad to see I wound you up.

Some aspects of this story were powerful & a couple were woefully contrived & borderline pedestrian. The father & doomed , future daughter dynamic was awesome & very effective without being ' affected ' . I hated the petty politics jabs & I'm far from being a Obama fan.

I also didn't like the passive-aggressive deception in the plotline where the wife makes the decision not to tell the narrator that Jake really is his son. To me that arbritrary in the extreme where the narrator is not told ' for his own good' that he has a child.

There is major communication chasm in how the wife communicates in both this aspect & the details of her involuntary tryst with her boss. Maybe I'm being too petty .... afterall if things were completely ducky in the marriage then there is no story.

Yet the positive features of this story canny be ignored. The humor, imagination & interaction of father , daughter . Loved it. This is either a extremely strong four star story or a weak five star effort. It's a compliment to Stang Star's powers as a author , I'm facing this dilemma.

What is not in doubt, is how hard this sprawling effort must have been to edit. As a reader , I have much to be grateful for in terms of Miko & Stang's collaboration. I have no idea what to vote but I thank both these people now for enriching this site through dint of their imagination & hard work.

You are still one of my favorite authers. From the time I realize you must spend writing. I can't beleave you could be one of the 10 percent that should be Republicans and I can't understand how any of the rest of us could be.

Bill

I love the creativity in the plot. Though I too wouldn't have been so obvious about the political portions, I am immensely grateful to you for the work you put into providing entertainment for me for free, week after week. Five stars, SS, and keep on writing.

I read this on my I phone and you had me going at the end of page 1 with the President Obama ending line of that page. It was really hard to believe at that point and I almost did not go to page 2. I thought oh no, they got to you ala The Bodysnatchers or some mind control way, lol. When I did go to page 2 and seen you were talking about Sasha Obama in the future, I thought ok maybe that would be worth a try. lol.

Good writing and it seems you and Miko are a good team.

Keep writing. Your muse is doing a great job.

... if you are going to leave a comment, learn to spell first!!

The story was quite good, although the author seemed to be in a bit of a hurry to wrap up all the loose ends.

This one was well done. The time travel ploy gave you a way to talk about cause and effect and how little we know of the good and ill we do. The comments on your (putative) political leanings were bizarre. The commentors seem to believe your Democrat. And maybe you are. But I don't think that's at all clear from your character's comments. Or maybe the commentors can't psychologically distinguish between reality and fiction.

I got to the beginning of page two and crossed it off my list. You are without a doubt one of the best of these writers if not the very best writer, but this story is so far out of the known universe I could not think of continuing much less enjoying it. So, I will say good night and wait for the next story which I am sure will be a super-duper winner.

Dennis

of all things to mess with a taurus and electric hybrid car and call it a mustang, extremely sad. If your taking a pole on the endings I liked it, just saying

...fertile mind.

You like to screw around with your reader's minds. Funny thing of it is, it seems the readers like that.

Good job. Thanks for writing.

Regards,

-Pultoy

I was a big fan of Stangstaro6 but this sets a new low, not only for him but for the site.

This should be made into a God damnable movie.

Erp, ack, bleep.

Nice - another unique story; thanks for sharing!

Love that you are daring to do something different and I found your.jabs at politics funny.It took some thought abd inteligence to do this.The one bit of a problem is sarah could have gotten a blood test to show doping and used that to show him she was raped.As far as future cities looking like shopping malls lot of towbs already do,full of wall marts,olive gardens and bed,bath and beyond.

NIce bit of Sci Fi, but more importantly it shows how important reason and communication are. If he hadn't flown off the handle in the first place and had really sat down and talked with his wife, it would have been obvious that that the sex had not been with his wifes consent, and probably would have resulted in getting the boss for rape. Another good one Ss06, I like the way you are branching out in your stories.

not sure about it though. you have done better, a lot better. drugged wife? ok i can buy that. kid is his, ok there too. wife smart and true but does not say she thinks she was drugged and gets a test? ok it s a story. but how many times do we have to read "i'll get back to that" or words to that effect. this one is not a 5, and it was just a little slow and not as good as you usually do and i bet you think so too. looking forward to your next story.

I'm not a science fiction buff, but I liked the overall premise. Unusual for you. Thanks

Nice premise, well-told. But oh! those mechanicals. Quibbles follow via "Send Feedback".

I am one of your BIGGEST fans, I usually love love love everyone of your stories-- but this one really didn't do it for me. It might have a lot to do with the fact that I hate sci-fi-- not hate, but if I can skip it or keep it I'd skip it....I love that the boy was his and the wife wasn't really a habitual cheating slut.. But the cheating sluts are the reasons why I read these stories... The sluts & the revenge makes me hungry for more... I absolutely love your stories SS06... No more sci-fi

I am so glad that you explained the symbolic meaning of your title and story. If it had been modeled after Shakespeare or Dickens I am sure it would not be as classy as modeling it after a comic book.

started out very familiar with a different story i read on this site but recovered very well. i only seen three mistakes but other than that it was good read.

1) he referenced "our kids" to that point in the story he only had a daughter.

2) again with the kids, when they were talking about him calling in the middle of the night.

you wrote that he would only call if something serious about the kids but he would have only called about his daughter. til this point he basically ignored the boy because he thought he wasnt his own.

3) it was a mistype you said "the" instead of "then".

again, great story and thanks for sharing! looking forward for the next one. =)

Romantic tale - sure

Sci Fi - definitely

Erotic -NO

LW - sorry but no

Stang, i am sorry for your losses(Your editor and Carroll Shelby passing)

Nice story but i think something is amiss.

Best Wishes,

.

Story line was very good. Not too much description just enough to fill in the back ground. Was able to visualize most of the story and did not feel like I had to skip ahead to keep it going.

Suggestion - keep the flash backs to a minimum. There was almost too many. Also the argumentative part between main characters was borderline too much.

Very nice in all

A bit off of the wall for being a normal loving wives story, but it was very interesting and entertaining.

A sweet and happy ending is always good to read .

Thanks for the good read

Loved the story and also the ending. About time you forgave one of the wives who made a mistake and for what better reason than to save the world for humanity. I know, it was a dirty job, but someone had to do it and I am proud of you, just sayin.

Oh yeah, five stars for originality and for finally having found a fragment of forgiveness in your overly rigid soul.

...actually liked the unique way of excusing the recon.

southern MI or northern OH - we'd be happy to see the prez get another turn if he keeps supporting our auto industry. as for future/passed, this is what happens when you try and get cute, a cute flop but still a flop, 2 stars

"A Christmas Carol" meets "Back to the Future" meets "The Three Laws of Robotics".

And oddly enough, they get along famously :)

Great story

If she had been raped, she would have been hollering "Rape" first thing in the morning. Secondly her reasoning about not telling him that Jake was his son just didn't make that much sense, since her marriage, and the emotional well being of her child were at stake.

Tina coming back from the future and taking out Davenport was genius, and the whole story had a great surrealistic old "Twilight Zone" feeling to it, that I grokked to the max.

Nice to be able to disappear in a story once and awhile. Always good stories flow from your pen! Thanks for writing

because you main objective, at least HERE, is to write for a general audience, NOT a partisan crowd who love just Bush or Clinton or Obama or Reagan or Carter, etc. <p>

#2: decide whether it is a fictional belonging in the "Loving Wives" section, or a science fiction/time traveling story --- with some "loving wive" aspects in the story... <p>

#3: when you put #1 and #2 together --- with dissonant/out of wack pacing, odd and unbelievable emotions, inappropriate and out-of-place dialogues and monologues --- you lose most of your story; you're a prolific writer and probably you simply wanted to "experiment" a bit with this story... but, regardless, eventually you will have to decide more firmly... <p>

I love science fiction and time traveling stories: PERSONALLY I think you had focused on the time-traveling angle of this story, making it the CORE story, with the cheating and its consequence (including the confusion, sub-plot developments, be they imaginary or real, in alternate realities, etc.) are MERE concomitants, this story WOULD/COULD have turned out to be rather unique and interesting; and it would have worked better. Indeed, it would have satisfied BOTH audiences more... <p>

many of the classical science fiction stories by masters like Heinlein, Asimov, Anthony, et al were indeed about all kinds of human foibles like cheating, killing, murder, scheming, psychosis, etc.... with the masters focusing on ONE MAIN writing genre as the ANCHORING one...

If I learned that my estranged wife had given birth to my child and not told me about it until he was old enough to walk and talk, that would hurt me more than any affair. All those lost moments...not seeing him come into this world or grow, not hearing the first words or helping him learn to walk or seeing his eyes light up as you take him to the zoo or forest...these are powerful bonding moments and they are part of what make an abstract concept ("my child") real and overwhelming.

I see a bunch of left wing liberals think this story is "political" because you decided to use the name of a sitting president and show some things that government being your mother could cause in the future.

The hell with them. the story was creative and a breath of fresh air on this web site. Keep it up!

I thought this was a good read. Everybody got what they deserved in the end. The grammer was good, the plot was good and the climax was exciting. I wish real life would sort itself out like this story did. I will tell you though, some of the crap coming from the anonymous peanut gallery is getting a little boorish and boreing. *5 stars*

I enjoyed your story very much it was a nice twist.

Why doesn't Tina just go back before Sarah's fateful trip and convince her not to go? No rape, no divorce, no questions about paternity. Both kids get two loving parents.

Well done again. A fine tale and enjoyable change up fro your usual fare-yet still a good read.

I may be showing my age ...but the future Tina set out in your story seems to be directly from the song lyrics of the old 60s tune "In the Year 2525"

Thanks again for another good story.

I'm starting to think that you believe reconciliation stories fall under the same category as time travel stories - FICTION. HAHAHAHA!

the premise is too simple. No single person is ever responsible for a world shattering invention. The A-Bomb would have been invented by other nations eventually but the U.S. was driven by World War II and the fear that the Germans would build it first. The Manhattan Project invovled an army of scientists, engineers and the military following 3 separate approaches. The idea that a kid no matter how gifted can create a self aware robot without the necessary infrastucture is a simple fantasy. Then you take that same genius add his true father and he is a normal guy? Good story but you stretched the premise too far. A guess a time paradox is out of the question!

The merger of a (inherently complex) scifi story with a (in this case really lame) cheating wifes tale just didn't work well. You had to dump the scifi story down so much that it was painful to read, on the other hand it took away time from the cheating wifes tale so that there wasn't much either.

Sorry to give such a negative review, but i was just thinking all the time: Get to the point. And that is just not good enough.

I think both tales could have worked, but not together. Add to that the fact that writing a good scifi story takes much more time than one week. I can not imagine a case where you would get away with less than 15 pages. You could write a story in that setting, i am sure, because you are a good Author, but not in this very constricted timeframe.

@ SleeplessinMD3 Majority of SS06's stories are fable stories, so the without loving parent(s) children could become dangerous for the society are a symbolic. However some similar mind people could gather in a technical invention group (not 1 more) and they together could become dangerouse for the sociaty or the results of technics and sciences could be misused by a similar team...........or the leader(s) of an important state (Adolf Hitler). A.The centrum the lack of loving parent is in this story and for the child is benefit if his/her mother's husband, exhusband is DNA relative to the children. In the paleolit the ancient Homo Sapiens Sapiens goups lived in small group (like the San (Bushmans) people in the Kalahary desert) and the all children had to bring up to survive the struggle against the Nature and the meeting with other groups assisted avoiding the inbreed. The ancient mankind did not know the DNA test and the new baby may be a benefit with newer genetical positive from other group. The Inuits and the Polinesians gathered new DNA from the strangers in the XVIII-XIX Century with similar method . However today we are more than 6 billion the Homo Sapiens Sapiens and except for some isolated territories as Tristan Da Cunha islands the danger for the young children is not the inbreeding but the lack of loving parent and the not DNA test proof children can couse frustation at a husband or it can couse such problem as in the story, where the exhusband took the DNA test proof daughter with the free meeting but the boy remained at home with his mother for long time memento for his bastard state............Science takes that time the father is sure the mesurment is only money question..........

...but not horrible either, just a little confusing. Maybe not Huedogg2 confusing (see "My Dad's Dad") but a little confusing, nonetheless. Hey, even the great ones (DG Hear, Slirpuff, yourself) have an off day every once in a while.

As far as the 2015 Mustang goes, that's why I've sunk about $15,000 (exterior trim, CAI, throttle body, Bullit wheels, HP intake, cams, long tube headers, high flow cats and, last but not least, Flowmaster "American Thunder" exhaust system) into my red candy metallic 2010.

Aside from the sycophantic meanderings and recurrent lectures of a few idiots, this story did not elicit much in the way of positive reviews and here is why. A good story writes itself in the sense that the characters tell it to the reader. In this case, the characters acted simply as vehicles to narrate a narrow, simplistic, humorless, and preachy diatribe that had no suspense. No wonder so many readers decided to skip out after a page or two.

3 star effort, thanks for trying, next time don't write the whole story and add a couple of one-dimensional characters on as afterthoughts.

@ Dear Anon To understand well some stories is not only itself the plot. Yes, many stories are only the plot and no more, but at SS06 has more stories where the story is not alone the plote itself. SS06 used Sci-Fi equipments to show this is a fable story.................Sometime to use the brain the way that the reader understands some fable story. The people are tired and to use brain is tiresome, I understand........

If you want to read a good scifi story where there is a believable and interesting background, i suggest 'The Preacher Man' by hammingbyrd7 over at SOL.

The background in this story was just a stupid al gore rant dumbed down for third graders. Stang is a very good author but you just have to see that in his one-story-a-week speed there are severe limits to how complex a story can get. A teacher can not teach fourier transformation in 30 minutes, no matter how good a teacher he is. And Stang can not create a believable scifi story in 4 pages, no matter how good an author he is. (That the version he presented here is also totally retarded is a different matter)

I try to explain the meat of the story for people with tired brain and mind.

The children must be loving parents and lack of one of the parents are problem everytime. The divorced parent can play a helping role, because the custudy winner parent can be the strick parent and the every second weeked parent can be the liberal parent and against the broken family this could work for the children benefit. The died parent may be a helping picture in the children's soul, but it can not subsituate the died parent. However this situation where the exhusband thought the first child the daughter is his and the second child is from an extramarital affair ARE NOT SIMILAR TO THE PREVIOUS EXAMPLES.......... THERE IS NOT ANY LAW, ETICAL RULE, SOCIETY REQUIRMENTS for an husband or exhusband to love a BASTARD from an extramarital affair. In the story the exhusband could play the liberal parent for his daughter, but the second child the boy will learn in young ages he is not a loved person (except for his mother) and he will be envy for his sister. In the school he will think the fellows tell him "you are a son of the bitch" is not humorous but it is right. Adolf Hitler's father was cruel to him in his childhood and Hitler thought in his all life he was a bastard and his father was cruel to him for this thing. The childhood imprint may be a starting step for a cruel dictator's soul developing with 50 million died people. In the story the boy became a mankind destroyer with AI robots, which was built and invented by his company. He became a miserable personality because he got negative imprit in his childhood. This origined from an extramarital affair as the root couse the fall of the mankind. This is an over the top scenario, but as in a fable story by SS06 it is not surpising for me. An asocial member of the sociaty as criminal may be also a problem. DG HEAR has an excellent story about such a man who became normal by the romantic love: the title is the next: "A Thousand Bucks Ch. 05".

The sadistic women and wives can not oblidge husbands to love bastards from cheating. In the Roman Catolic countries there is divorce so in Ireland recently and some country the exhusbands do not pay any children support money for bastards, so in the USA the children are below 4 years old the exhusband do not pay children support for bastards.

I have some excellent stories in my favorit collection, but in every story the husbands acccept and love these children VOLUNTARYLY. The key word these stories the VOLUNTARY decision: The list is the next from my collection:

Thecelt "Special Day Ch. 04.", leapyearguy "Strictly Business Ch. 02", StangStar06 "Forever Gone, Forever You".

The fable story got help from its Sci-Fi equipment Time Travel. His daughter came from the future to show him the fall of the mankind by her cruel brother. His daughter explained him, his exwife was victim of a rape, which was organized by her boss with drugs in her food and she was pregnant with his DNA proof son. From here the reconcilation with the punishment for the son of the bitch boss (to disappear in the nothing) was straight way in the story...............We male people like generaly better our genetic offsprings and to compel accepting bastards is a sadistic thing from wives in the DNA test World and sadistic FOR THOSE CHILDREN who suffer from being bastard!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! An exwife also is better if the children are common............or adopted.

BTW The story logical way would be the daughter from the future to explain her wife the rape plan from her boss, but the FABLE story needs other story logic.

@ count2three SS06 did not write some Sci-Fi story he wrote a newer fable story which uses the Sci-Fi principles. Here you can see well the not reality atributums against other SS06 fable stories, but I listed many funny things in the other SS06 fable story "Falling Off of the Swing" as well. I suggest to read my Assay in the comment part. I am also big Sci-Fi and Fantasy fan and this story is not Sci-Fi at all against the Sci-Fi instruments.......

My favorits "A Beautiful Wish" from 800IBgorilla and the "Outlander" from sirreadsalot10, "Aftermath" from All Steiner on SOL or the 40000 years ago stories from cmsix on SOL etc..

he said "sycophantic meanderings and recurrent lectures of a few idiots." LOL

1) The author is writing about the human condition. Part of the human condition is politics. The author gets to pick and choose which side of the political divide he's on. If you want to write a fantasy where the Left (or Right) is always correct, then write your own story. Stang is a tongue in cheek writer, but as an AVID (obsessive? fetishist?) car fan, and with the support the Big O has shown in 'green' cars, emissions, his extrapolation is not out of line and done in a funny way.

2)While the WRITER can mention politics, I think the comments should NOT include them and I'd strongly suggest that political comments be deleted. This isn't and shouldn't be a political forum. I go other places for that. This is a place about the writing and the choices people make.

3) Writing here is a struggle in some ways; one's which the readers may not actually understand. Speaking personally, I do not to go to Lit and scan ALL new stories in all catagories. I scan LW stories. Most of the authors I like and respect are here. Only AFTER I find an author I like and respect will I wade into his/her other works (romance, non-erotic [shudder] occassionally novellas...). Sorry HDK. I'm still not reading your Western.

Likewise, Stang's readership is in LW. He is a household name HERE. If he wrote a story in Sci-Fi, he'd get nowhere near the number of views or comments as he'd have to cut a brand new fanbase there. We don't get paid. You'd have to pay me five or six figures to make me do the kind of output that Stang makes and the only payment he gets is the comments, good bad and indifferent. It's enough to know that people care enough about your byline to actually READ your stuff. So no, I understandy entirely why he wanted to post here. Unfortunately the mods don't give us control for multiple catagories. It's a choice and one the writers have to make.

I tell you this because it is not apparent to the readers. I have a number of stories which distincty belong in other catagories but I haven't posted them because of such an uphill battle for readership.

These are my opinions and some background information regarding some of the comments here.

Stop for just one second in your busy world of your own creation....and understand one thing....NONE ...of...ANY...of the STORYS...on this site are REAL....ok ...got your attention...now THANK...ALL...the writers ...for taking their time and efforts...too entertain us...Stangstar06...I love reading your stuff...PLEASE...don't stop writing....it would be a much sadder site without your input....not ALL of us believe in the cut and dry..INSTANT world...nor do we ALL believe in Burn the Bitch...I like some REVENGE...but tempered with ...what this world sadly lacks...Compassion....by the way fellow readers...I'm 60 yrs old...and married for 36 of those years...not that that will matter to most of you..once again Thanks Stang.

Exactly right. Stang writes great LW stories. He even had great trips into other genres. eg. Western or recently Horror/Non-Human. But those are genres that are, for lack of a better word, very forgiving of contricted writing space. You can port a story into a western setting or make some of the characters werewolves without having to write too much additional information. (You can of course create a whole paralell world as evidenced by JazCullen et al. but you don't HAVE TO) Other with the SciFi genre. There you have to really flash out a setting before it can become believable. And you can't do that in the space of 4 Pages, not even Stang. So what is left is you can go into totally shallow/superficial rants. For example how the Mustang my be emasculated in future designs. Stang decided here to do that at the cost of having barely space left to give even the tiniest bit of depth to his plot/characters and it shows, badly.

So I would totally love to see Stang dab into new territory in the future but you have to do it carefully and consider that the plot and the character must come first, otherwise its just a pseudo scientific rant and there are other people who do that much better, eg Steven Hawkings.

Congrats to Stang, on another excellent story!

I do agree with one other review, though - in the scant 40 years between Jake's contemporary world and that of Future-Tina, there would not be sufficient time for the human gene-pool to become so utterly "homogenized" that there would only be one skin-color.

Other reviewers have lashed the story because Future-Tina didn't simply go back in time far enough to warn her mother to watch the food as well as the beverages, for date-rape drugs. Still others have suggested that Future-Tina should simply have gone back in time and murdered Davenport before he could rape Sarah.

That second alternative smacks of the sort of deprivation of civil rights that we see in "Minority Report", where people are arrested and imprisoned BEFORE they can commit a crime. Technically, such people are not really guilty of a crime right up to the moment where they COMMIT the crime. There's always a chance that - at the very last nano-second, a neuron in the brain will fire a different message, and the would-be perp will walk away without doing the dastardly deed.

With regard to the first suggestion: If Future-Tina had either warned Sarah, or killed Davenport prior to the rape, then Jake would never have divorced Sarah, and the entire "reason" or "foundation" for this story would never have occurred. There would be no real reason for Future-Tina to show up and explain to Jake that - in an "alternate history" - Davenport had raped Sarah, Sarah had refused to tell Jake that it WAS a rape, not a willing copulation, and Jake had divorced Sarah... all because none of it had "really" happened, at least in the "adjusted" flow of history.

It should also be noted that Stang admits making a concerted effort to bring this story in at a significantly shorter length than most of his tales - and, thus, he had been compelled to omit a lot of things he had envisioned for the original version of this tale. My guess is that there is also ANOTHER reason for Future-Tina's precise course of action. She admits that there are things she isn't telling Jake. Perhaps one of those things is that - in a "timeline" where the rape never occurred, Jake is the one who eventually winds up cheating. As it is, Jake NOW knows exactly how much Sarah means to him - he's experienced all of the effects of losing her. NOW, he has even MORE motivation to prevent his ever being tempted to cheat on her.

Additionally, it's not completely stated, but Jake appears to change his profession in the wake of Future-Tina's visit, by starting his own business. Perhaps that business never would have existed, save for Future-Tina's intervention, and that business is somehow crucial to the flow of "future history". We'll never know, because the things Tina doesn't tell her father are obviously part of what Stang deleted from the longer version of this story.

And, since others are carping on politics, I might as well get MY two cents (slightly adjusted due to inflation) in, as well: Barack Obama will NOT get a second term. He hasn't earned it, and he doesn't deserve it - and most Americans know this, deep down in their souls, as well as their wallets!

Again, a great story, however, it felt rushed, you rushed to the daughter coming back from the future, you rushed through her explanations, you rushed through him understanding and coming to terms with what his daughter told him, you rushed through the sex, everything seemed rushed. Still a five star story though, as always.

To all those people who think SS06 needs to write shorter stories, oh blow me, some people need time to write a good tale that you can really sink your teeth into and lose yourself. Also, as for the politics, once again, Blow me, not everyone is from the states and cares about the politics, in fact, most of us sit back and laugh. This is a literary website, an erotic one in fact, and if you only read a page, or read a political leader's name and then procede to skip all the way to the comments solely so you can leave a nasty comment, then perhaps you should go to a library and try trolling there.

I will support those who want you to stick with your style and comfort level - if you had stretched it out some the "failings" people have most commented on would have been self resolving.

As for the complaints about the politics - tough nuts and chew harder - your story your decisions period. The concepts you presented are all viable - for some desirable for others not - whatever - it is a story d00ds, it can't be right or wrong - it just is.

The genetic blending would be hard without the added manipulation but so what?

Thank you both for the effort - I liked the husband and wife team both fallible both loving (if thick headed in both cases) and they eventually got it together.

@ Harry (8) Somebody who apreciates more literature form, as near to life, satire, fable or fantasy that reader can enjoy more stories and more Authors.

I divided the 10 sentences of my answer to Harry In Va in distict 10 stories.

1. Sentence leapyearguy „Strickly Business Ch. 02”

2. Sentence ohio „Visiting Richard Gronier”

3. Sentence DGHear „Another Chance”

4. Sentence K.K. „Flight Delay”

5. Sentence lucsmith „Let the Punishment Fit the Crime”

6. Sentence the Troubador „Wife Get Even”

7. Sentence FrancisMacomber „The Stairway to Haeven”

8. Sentence StangStar06 „Divorce and Future”

9. Sentence cpete „Blood from a Turnip”

10. Sentence Vulcez „How Are You”

Very nice science fiction story!! This reminds me of all the old sci-fi master writers.

Well done!!!

More please.

Best regards

It was good, I just thought it would have been a lot better to be just a tad bit more fleshed out.

A well thought out and exicuted story, one of the best I've read here in a long time.

Thank you

I am not a fan of sci-fi stories but this one was well thought out. A master storyteller.