All Comments on 'Do I Make Myself Clear'

This made me want to throw up.

I'm confused because I don't understand. Was she being punished or not? The note would indicate that she was following orders, but her reactions and his demeanor didn't show that, so I don't understand your premise. As a submissive, I'm very conflicted about stories like this and while I try to not comment based on content, trying instead to comment in ways that assist the writer be better (because as a writer that is what I seek); however, in this case the two are very closely related. From the writing perspective, the sense you weave through the entire story - of her having failed in meeting her Master's rules (and I'm not going there) her emotions, regrets, sorrow, etc and his anger, disappointment, punishment, actions etc is completely twisted at the end by the note. A twist at the end of a story is fine, but that is where my issue with the content comes up. In this case, in this genre - if what you described was truly the scenario (that she was following orders as he left them in the note) then none of the emotions you detail in the story make any sense. I feel like you need to pick one path or the other and stay true to it. I hope this comment makes sense and is helpful in some way.

For some reason my login didn't take! If you want to contact me about my comment, my member name is lilsubalex. (I hate anonymous feedback!!)

If her monster just wants to punish her why go through any of the acting out for lateness. There will be occasions when someone will be late totally beyond control. I missed seeing my brother before he died while waiting 2 hours behind someone elses car accident one hundred adn fifty miles away.

I am not sure if this farce was started by a note he left before or after she went to work. It did round it out for overall stupidity. He needs psychological help and they need marraige counseling. If all she wants in life is punishment she is with the right idiot.

I guess the other commentators just didn't get it. It was all a game being played out - I thought it was very hot and it is something I am currently exploring with my lover. Very well written and exciting. Thank you.

I got the twist...as the story was from her point of view, it might have been hotter if there'd been more evidence she was enjoying the scene. I don't think it would have weakened the story any.

that ending was like the ending of the movie THE SIXTH SENSE...didnt see it cumming but made the whole thing even BETTER than it already was. OMFG! Loved it!

I liked the story until we got to the end... I think the note on the fridge killed it for me.