All Comments on 'Escalation Ch. 04'

He RAAC'd out. Seriously? Damn, dude.

2 Stars.

mostly

Well, you pulled that off pretty well. I still do not think he should trust her. I wouldn't for sure. Cheers!

Very good stuff sir.

A surprising ending of a couple learning about their bad moods, and like in "A thousand and one nights" he was reconquered by her talking all nights. Of course the child was the perfect ending. A good story...

for real?

so in a way she won, how soon till she becomes a slut again

By the way, I like surprises.

Some of the assholes might not like this,but this one was amazing,a seemingly impossible situation that resolves itself in a weird,wild way. Yeah,it is a bit over the top,but it has its own rough beauty,that combines a BTB with reconciliation...5*

Good writing, the plot and characters held my attention. It was not very erotic, it was not even all that much of a spectacle piece. It was more like watching the psychological melt down of a woman and watching as the illness spread to her husband. In the end, this story is about two self destructive irrational people who are now jeopardizing the life of a child - great. In real-life this is not romantic or entertaining, it is sad,creepy and depressing. I see years of police and CPS interventions and horrific emotional scarring ahead for all involved.

He just couldn't quit her. I would have, but I'm not him. The third installment that seemed to blow chunks and was uncomment-worthy by my standards, looks a whole lot better given the added context of conclusion. This story had so many wobbles as it stumbled over credibility gaps but finished VERY strong. Entertainment squared. *****

Wasn't expecting the kid thing...well played. I still think the story overall is over too unbelievable even especially for a FTDS story, but...the ending chapters (3 and 4) got me.

"I was humiliated to be married to you, and didn't want to be married"

She said that when she was drunk, "in vino veritas" is the saying meaning: in wine truth, the truth slips out when people are very drunk.

So the 180 degree turn around in her feelings toward him rings false to me, especially after the things they did to each other.

....at the hospital. Yes, she fucked up. But really.....she was even willing to dig her own grave at his behest. They're both crazy, anyway. They deserve each other. I feel bad for the kid, but otherwise....it was touching to see them get through to each other and face their demons. Yes, she was batty, but so was he. Like I said, they deserve each other and perhaps they can get some therapy. And LOTS of medication.

So your proof that you can write original stories is to just start repeating yourself now? And I thought only Stangstar was allowed to get away with writing the same story again and again with the names changed, this is just your ending to Danielle's Revenge over again.

and yes if you look at FTDS previous works you will see that many of his stories feature some pretty extreme stuff like this., Even the sex scenes were boring and painful to read. Just awful

The end of this reminds me of the story where hubby kidnaps the wife and her lover, binds and keeps them naked in a neighbors basement, he builds her an underground house and he ends up forgiving her. These characters flipped and flopped so readily between rational adults to bickering siblings that I cannot fathom how this chapter takes place. I simply don't like character's personalities changing to suit the "twist" the author is looking for.

just a wacked up unbelievable Looney toon of a tale. I cant believe I read this !

Where to even start!

Ugh!

Excuse me while I go throw up after reading that RUBBISH! And wife or not, RAPE is RAPE and that is exactly what he was doing. FTDS can't even write an original story. He goes off about these cuck writers but thats exactly what he is!

I liked it. It reminded me a lot of a similar story you wrote. Regardless of if you cared for the story or not, it was well written. Keep on giving us original stuff. As much as I like your finishing others stories, your work deserves a read as well.

Enough said.

I thought you could have done more with the ending. As I read it, I kept thinking you were taking us down a familiar path, but you'd change it up in the end. You didn't and the ending was rather humdrum and sadly, predictable.

the call it in while watching prime time reality TV, but, made in china.

usually when you finish the damn story there is some form of completion. some portion of an ending. a bit of a wrap up of the issues leading up to the penultimate point of the precipice upon which they are perched. .

instead we are left with a Stockholm Syndrome couple nurturing an infant in a cabin in Strawberry Canyon outside of Logan, UT, using their own names during the period of penalty for major felonies, while in contact with the immediate and unforgiving family.

a former live in lover in Chubbuck, Tyhee, or Alameda who would like to know what happened to the lady he took into his life after meeting her at the Green T?

a sister who thought she had a chance at happiness, only to be rejected for ? ? ?

while Debbie is sitting, wondering wtf happened to her potential future.

shall we even ask about the boss who pushed Marty out of the company on his way to join the 3 employees who were enjoying an airtight encounter with the unremorseful bride?

oh well, will we have a 5th chapter in this 4 part series? or will someone step up and FTDS ?

?

OMG!

A RAAC story?

Really?

A Goddam pathetic RAAC story at that!

I am truly disappointed and amazed that you would actually post some shit like this after some of the amazing work that you have done for the other bitch writers, and non-men so prevalent on this site.

This story should have been left unfinished, so that somebody else could have given it a decent ending.

there will be pit-falls. TK U MLJ LV NV

What as great ending. I really never expected it. I was wrapped up in the revenge plot.

Congrats on a good story!

Unoriginal, badly plotted and nothing more than a piss poor rehash of your previous work. You should stick to finishing off what other writers come up with.

the thing that was not addressed was whether her pregnancy was due to living with the other man. The timelines would not have precluded that, at least at first. Almost reversed Stockholm Syndrome.

Hasn't this ending been presented elsewhere? Perhaps even by FTDS?

Actually I thought it was a good story, not great but still good. Admittedly ch.4 was mild compared to the build up, but fans of FTDS will have almost expected that the idiot would finally have to succumb to love once she accepted her punishment and reminded him of their history. The BTB's will be screaming - so what - this is his story and he calls the shots.

More please??

Nothing else these two nut jobs did made sense, so what's one more unbelievable act, complete reconciliation. FTDS has rescued a number of worse stories, so I say cut him/her (sorry if should know, but I don't) some slack here. At least this couple is keeping their psychoses contained within their own relationship, rather than going out to fuck up other peoples lives. The movie Psycho was much better written, but no more believable. You kept me reading, even if it was out of perverse fascination. Thanks for all the work. Do more, but better.

I just kept wondering what happened in their earlier life to make them this stupid. It's hard to enjoy a story when you keep thinking "morons" to yourself with each new paragraph.

Masterful! No other way of putting it. We go into chapter 4 salivating to see him kill the cunt and by the time she finishes digging the hole, you know they are going to make it.

Though he didn't truly BTB, I absolutely loved your story. 5 stars from me.

I kept waiting for her to up the ante as it was her turn to attack, instead she gives him a wonderful present... Did he keep the gun?

The end was kind of anticlimactic. I guess you gave both sides of the argument something to like and dislike. I guess the ending wasn't terrible, it just didn't 'pop' and as someone mentioned, you might want to ftds the ftds story. What about the boss, Debbie, Amy, (I still want to see the sisters together, maybe that can be part of their punishment)? I'm still not certain he can trust Sheri or Amy. I could have been happy to see him never even get physical with her, just follow her from town to town, leaving little signs that he was always watching. It wasn't bad at all, I just think you can still ftds. Now on to Party of Five hopefully. Good job and good luck.

Wait. Seriously? After all that's happened, it's RAAC? And with this many loose ends as rightbank pointed out? FTDS didn't ftds...

I don't even know where to begin...How would hubby know wifey has changed? He believes her only because she says so? Though she has not outright LIED, she's changed her mind more often than I change underwear! One moment she dryhumps his coworkers, the next she wants to be buddybuddy with him again. Then she wants an amicable divorce, and next she does a gangbang to hurt him.

And, ofcourse she's going to say she loves him, she's changed, she'll never do it again, etc. ANYTHING to get out of being killed. She was literally digging her own grave at that moment!

Had she really not married that other guy, instead living with him? Not verified.

That kid of theirs (if it IS his!) is going to be MESSED UP.

What about the police? Didn't wifey say they were after him? What about Debbie? Would the sister in law be impossibly smug about the two of them getting back together?

So the two of them just make a rule about never talking about that again? That's it? They're never even going to try to resolve any of their problems, but instead shove it under the rug? What if she gets angry again at him? Gangbang with dozens of guys, on TV, to rub it in? Because hey, he'll always come back to her, no matter what she does.

I liked most, if not all of your stories, FTDS, but I don't like this one one bit.

usually pple put the backstory in on the 1st page , all those little details , how they met , what they did , how things progressed , etc etc etc. putting them in at the end during the last chapter was Genius. in hindsight using them as part of the reconciliation process is something i am surprised more Authors have not done. it worked remarkably well.

intriguing tale , interesting & enjoyable storyline/plot.

by not including any backstory in the early chapters , the readers view of the protagonists is tempered soley by the escalating events.

not sure how it could have been included ,but some clearer statements of how the time they spent apart calmed & softened their views may have clarified for some readers how they were able to reconcile. (then again a signpost written in blood will never be seen by those unwilling to look, so proly not worth unbalancing the story trying to achieve that)

i see lots of comments from the BTB fraternity enraged at the ending.

not so much interest on the topic of how or why a woman would take back a guy that had beat the hell out of 3 pple & whom then kidnaps her, enslaves her & who she had thought intended to eventually murder her..

just to add some background to my views relating to real life.

i am a one woman man who loves a one man woman

i hate cheating & betrayl

we enjoy consensual bdsm.

we despise abuse & non consensual violence.

having said that we both thought this FICTIONAL story was enthralling , sublime & exquisite. well written , well thought out , well executed.

i know the BTB brigade struggle to seperate FICTION from an account of real life events. and i know they will always struggle to see beyond the red mist that clouds their vision , it's a shame that if they insist on reading some storys that do not reflect their views & preferences that they are unable to have an open mind on the quality of the writing.

Salut.

xxxhugsxxx

TwistedOliver

you should have a fifth chapter where debbie appears with a child and have sherri go ape shit again and let the craziness continue

I liked it. I've enjoyed your writing, and can't wait for more of your original work.

This did not end the way I thought it would! haha, but I love a good reconciliation story. Enjoyed it!

FTDS absolutely surprised me. I could not believe RAAC would occur in chapter 4. I hope he writes more full stories, in addition to his trademark FTDS.

Mate, perhaps you should give the finishing of other stories a bit of a break and do more originals. This story was just magnificent. Unlike some others, I LOVED the ending because, for me, it made sense. They were two very headstrong people madly in love with each other but who lacked the communication skills & time/space to really fix their issues. They both had personalities where they had to have the last say (& we all know folks like that!) Too many other people and distractions around them at home made it that much harder. It took the time and space that the solitude of the mountain cabin gave them to enable our heroes to really fix their issues and how - by talking (the device of Sheri quietly reminiscing each night while chained up was clever) and Marty listening - communicating. I love how you used the wild crazy ride in the first 3 chapters to set it up & more forcefully make that fundamental relationships moral truth point. 5* & added to my favourites list. Bravo!!! Ken

So one is an asshole for not liking this. Speak for yourself asshole. I have to agree (which I seldom do) with Harry and frontlinecaster on this one. Stick with writing endings, even some of those are questionable. Can't say I like any of the characters in this tale, but then I didn't have to read it, did I?

Awesome effort. And the BTB/ForgiveTheBitch ending was superb. 4*

Now you just need to stay away from those trashy stories you've been finishing :-)

waited all day to comment.

OK, so some people recognized the ending to "Danielle's Revenge" influencing this work........BUT NOBODY....

got the "Princess Bride" reference!

I for one, loved it. And it WAS just the thing to help the RAAC seem more believable.

The masterstroke of your writing is getting the savvy reader to understand that SHE (the - NOT REAL CHARACTER-) got the "Princess Bride" reference too. And it is what gave her the hope she needed to believe in the chances for her own survival.

I liked the idea of a woman confronted with the idea: " NOW I have to do WHATEVER it takes to save my marriage" commingled with "AND my life!"

As always (since I am a true fan)- GENIOUS. PURE GENIOUS!!!!

However, the ABSOLUTE FUCKING BEST PART for me was:

Her bedtime stories. Giving him a chance to relive the "good" times.

I liked the way you wrote it. I liked the way you edited it. I liked the power it gave this final chapter. I liked the way it made the RAAC believable. I truly felt you hit a high point few other authors have seen with that exchange! Again, even if the previous 3 chapters were inconsequential drivel, you fully redeemed yourself in showing us readers that it was all about this last chapter. WELL DONE!!!!!!

I don't care who the commenters are who deride you. A true fan (like me) will ABSOLUTLEY ASSURE you that this WAS your best work to date.

I have one more observation.

It seems to me that your last two stories ( One chapter quickies BEFORE you started this series) were also part of the build up for today.

You needed to get your single-minded BTBers ready for a new FTDS who will pursue the ultimate end.....

This of course, throws EVERYONE off from the idea that INSTEAD of DEATH we are rejuvenated with the promise of new life.

Fuck that guy- SwingerJoe! Everything he wishes the BTB crowd ( and we ALL know it is him doing the "angry old man Literotica Morals Police Spoof" in the comments) would aspire to, YOU, a champion for BTBers, bring on a well deserved RAAC! Again, pure GENIOUS!!!

Too many people forget that it really isn't about punishment as much as it is about getting someone to understand WHAT IS RIGHT!!! And even more, what should have been right from the very beginning. Is it really BTB to ask the philosophical questions like " Couldn't this ALL have been avoided IF........"??????????????

I hope that the volume of the critic's ire doesn't get you down. ALL three of your latest contributions have seemed to bring out the worst in our narrow-minded audience of commenters. All I can say, is that for me, I keep reading the progress you are making. I keep seeing the evolution you are enduring. I seem well equipped to visualize your (at times) meteoric rise to greatness. Every challenge you make to your reading audience.....if it gets just ONE PERSON TO THINK.....well.......

THEN YOU HAVE MORE THAN DONE YOUR JOB!!!!!!

Thanks again for the important work you do here in the LW category.

This site is a-damn sure better off with you contributing, than with you not!

and why not. Slick writing tremendous fun 5*

Never thought we would see an RAAC like this by FTDS. Unlike many of the commentators, though, I did mostly like the story. Excellent portrait of two fools - escalation is indeed an appropriate title for this over-the-top but highly entertaining mess.

Loved it. I actually enjoyed the reconcile.

Predicable path, in part because the title told us what to expect. Somewhat surprising ending. However, did it not occur to him she might be 3+ months pregnant instead of 2 1/2 months? If anyone would have you raising somebody else's kid, it would be that Bitch in an effort to score 21 years of payback and to save her own life.

Well written. Fair tail. Downside is none --- not a single one --- of the characters are likable. No hero. No good guy. Just really stupid people who deserve each other. Three Stars for the series.

Well thought out story. The final curtain came down on a mundane, common ending.

Thanks for another entertaining story, FTDS. 4*s earned , totally!!

But ! If you had finished with page 1 as the end, that would have been scary and worth 5*s ! Lol.

AMerryMan

Tremendous revenge on the cheating wife.

Huh?

True love is really fucking strange.

I guess.

These two selfish crazies definitely deserve each other.

can't believe your the,BIGGEST WIMP of all wimps!

Man, do I feel badly stretched.

This chapter, in its own way, is just as over the top as the others. Sorry I can't get where you are going. He hates her with an obsessive passion. Being willing to kill someone up close and person is no small thing. Spending $10's of thousands to track her and stalk her is no small thing. Being willing to put your life on hold to get her is no small thing. I'm convinced. He hates her with all his soul.

But wait! Maybe not? Ripping off the meme from "The Princess Bride", "I'll probably kill you in the morning.", tells me right off that he isn't a serious man. What is this? Over 3 chapters of hateful revenge and he isn't serious? Gee, that tells me the author isn't serious either. The author is screwing over the reader like the wife screwed him over. I really wasn't going to give you an over the top vengeance story, I just wanted you to think I was going to. Instead we are going to get a happily-ever-after tale with everyone Kumbayaing together and a baby in its cradle. How sweet. It isn't over the top, it's under the bottom.

If I were him, I would worry about waking up as a knife Is plunged into his heart.

Fin, I enjoyed the story, like War of the Roses. It's not necessary to be plausible. I feel entertained.

By the third chapter you were complaining and tearing the story apart. Yet, you OBVIOUSLY actually read ch. 4. If you thought "Escalation" was so bad, why did you read the whole thing? Repeating something over & over figuring you'll get a different outcome is also known as insanity.....

I liked this one! I also think they deserved each other. I liked the way the story went up and down and in the end you had to see the writing on the wall. Good tale FTDS. I enjoyed it brother!

Guys! Did you hear that, you're not supposed to read stories you've already decided you won't like! God, that must be a load off of all you btb readers, you don't have to go read every single cuckold story put up in this section, you can tell by the title, the description, the author, and usually the text itself within the first few sentences what kind of story it is. And reading that and commenting on that would be insanity at this point!

I'm so glad someone pointed that out!

I didn't see that coming. I was just hoping he wasn't going to kill her. This probably really pisses off the BTB crowd. I'm amazed the score for this chapter is over 4.00. Of course, it's just barely over that mark. It was over the top, but I liked it. It's said there's a thin line between love and hate. This couple kept hopping back and forth over it for 4 chapters. I love your style FTDS. Even though I don't always like your endings, you're fast becoming one of my favorite authors. Every time I check the new stories listing, I look for one of yours. Thanks.

I still don't like your FTDS stories, but I DO like this one. 5*

Feels better when you write an original story from beginning to end, doesn't it.

As for Laurel's lapdog frontlinecaster - go fuck yourself.

Time and again I'm reminded what a cesspool comment sections on the internet are. On Loving Wives? The same sniping, untruths, halftruths and flatout lies, like I'm watching Republicans and Democrats during elections. Blech.

I would have got a morning-after pill and made her swallow it. Then laughed.

I wouldn't have ditched the chains. Wouldn't kill her, but she is what she is, and she IS and ALWAYS WILL BE, untrustworthy. Still, a wet hole is a wet hole, whether you hate the bitch attached to it or not.

Liked it better at the end of chapter 3.

As for that fuckwit whining on about rape all the time... snore....

Because of the reconciliation you were gonna get 3 from me, but both frontslitclapster and HIV (or is that full-blown AIDS) both HATE this story so it's 5 stars ALLLL THE WAYYYY!!!!!

thanks for the offering.

Well I hope you still 'Finish the Damn Stories' that are just left in limbo. I just go nuts sometimes when a starter story is left up in the air or don't like the ending.

Thanks for helping us guys for getting our mojo back. Some of these stories bring back some old memories we had to face that never got finalized.

bill.... I always give you a 5 just to fix finish and make these stories more manable....

Congratulations!!! Excellent story!!!

But it was in spite of of the childish, hateful ways they treated each other. The only positive comment I can come up with is thanks for putting Sheri's partners in crime into the hospital. Seriously, these two were so fucked up, I couldn't even consider this a RAAC; just a fitting punishment for two idiots.

I have a proposition for you.

Please accept this as a creative writing challenge.

treat this as a project for the completion of a story you have read online. apply all the criteria you normally use to complete the unsatisfying non-completion of a story on Lit. and, give us an ending to this particular series with which you would be satisfied. cause this is not it.

you have done much better.

I found it fascinating, believable and oddly romantic. A weird combination of 1001 Arabian nights, "The Murderer Next Door" (my favorite text on evolutionary psychology - a great read), and all the things I like best about Quentin Tarantino movies.

The one down side for me is that the wife is not at all likable. My sweetie and I disagree on this; he says the stories she tells when he goes to sleep do show her likability. For me that's way too little far too late. I'd say the male lead should just kill her and be done with it - I don't see how he could trust her love - and that is entirely based in the fact that I don't find her likable.

What I would have needed was something in the very beginning to show her as the sweet nice person she supposedly was. I never really saw it. Maybe a momentary memory or a dream sequence early on would have done it for me.

Totally amazing masterful delightful seriously F-ed up writing.

Obviously the BTB crowd doesn't approve, but this strikes me as a well-earned reconciliation.

The most schizophrenic story I've ever read. Sorry, nice effort, but it just made me shake my head. Two stars.

That FTDS is a big BTB guy until he writes his own, from scratch!

I enjoyed it, man.

HELL NO! I don't care how you write it but there was no going back to that bitch. Sell her to a Mexican whorehouse or bury her in the swamp but get her pregnant and forgive her? What the hell did you pull THAT rabbit from? Excuse me while I go throw up. What a god awful ending.

I started out thinking he should divorce her, thinking no way he should even be listening to any of this. There for a bit I was thinking, good good, beat the shit out of the guys, and then maybe scare the shit out of her. Toward the end though I was hoping she'd kill him. Well written story though.

But I am not into cuckold stories.

Hope springs eternal. Legitimate reconciliation didn't think you could pull it off. But that's why I'm a simple reader. Extremely well written

FTDS is not a true BTB he has shown "mercy" more than once and a lot of tolerance - he consistently exacts a price however and he certainly did here on both of them.

She is still manipulative but no surprise there she is probably deeply in love with him and just a pure psycho but them so is he so it ought to work out great - RIGHT???

It was a fun ride - thanks -

That woman is one of the few that knows how to evaluate a story without being nasty about it. Man was this a well earned reconciliation. Wouldn't want to go through something like this twice. What a read. At times I was pissed off at her, other times at him,actually I thought they both were crazy. But the end was awesome. Who would have thought it. An emotional turmoil for both character and reader. Well done. (ML)

The bit where he kept saying "I'll likely kill you in the morning."

The story also reminded me of "The War of The Roses" - though oddly, I loved this story and hated that movie. And I don't think it was just because this story had a happy ending - though I'm a sucker for happy endings...

It's odd that I honestly believe that she's crazy in love with him, especially when it also seems likes she's CRAZY and "in love with him".

I'll probably have to reread this real soon to see if I can get a feel for why she'd initially behave as she did. Everything escalated FROM that point in an ever worsening game of one upmanship.

It disturbs me that people will play a game like that - especially in all seriousness - without realizing it either HAS to be stopped by one party quitting... Or by one party going "all in". UN-fortunately for the way they were playing, the only valid "quit" eventually became a divorce.

FORTUNATELY, his version of "all in" actually worked out even if at certain times he was totally serious about killing her.

reconciliation. They tried to kill him, she did everything she could to emasculate him, lying and cheating the entire time. Then she gets pregnant and he takes her back. Evidently he is tired of living. She will kill him the first chance she gets. She may not set out to do it, but it is in her nature to go bat shit crazy with little provocation. Her idea of entitlement takes her so far over the edge in her retaliations that it is only a matter of time. As I have said before, I wouldn't go to sleep, unprotected, if she was in the same state I was in.

Sorry man, 2 stars and that might be subject to reconsideration upon reflection.

Danielle's Revenge redux, anyone? Psycho wife getting over the top revenge, husband goes crazy, kidnaps her chains her up in a remote cabin, gets her pregnant, alls forgiven, happy ever after. Sound familiar? It should, because this is the re-run. Why write the same story, twice? Especially since the 'Redux' was so poor. As was this. Four chapters leading up to....what? More Raac. Starting to see a pattern here. You say you don't write wimps or cucks, which is mostly true, but you DO write a lot of ridiculous reconciliation at any cost stories. Disappointing.

I've just had a think from another point of view. It's not that FTDS wrote a Raac story (I was a bit harsh there. Emotions; so sue me), but I think it may be a case of Stockholm Syndrome. And I don't mean the protagonists, I mean the author. It may be that FTDS becomes so invested in the characters that he creates, that he he simply cannot bring himself to destroy them, with a reconciliation being the obvious and easy escape. Can't really be too harsh on a guy for becoming invested in what he writes, even if it does leave readers frustrated and pissed. Well, this reader, anyways.

Once he said that he was going to kill her he should have followed through. As the story went since she got pregnant and expressed what seemed to be severe sorrow I will go along with the reconciliation. But I still feel that he should have killed her for what she did when her fuck-buddies beat him up, no excuses. Although as fucked up as he was in his mind I think that he would have ended up killing himself. Yes, I know that it is just a story and I would give it an 8 on a scale of 10. Thank you for writing.

Well shit! Just shit! The negative critics are really comin' out of the woodworks, Eh?" What the hell, it was good fiction. Kudos, FTDS! Do some more. Cheers!

actually it was a pretty good story well worth reading good job.

I am glad it worked out ok in the end.

Well written and conceived story. 5* for the writing / 1* for the RAAC.

Way too much negative history to even think of reconciliation.

Just my take, YMMV.

Morgan DeWolfe

Not usually my favorite type of story, but really liked this one.

Loved the reference to the dread pirate Roberts.

Thank you. tom anon

The mark of a good story is that it keeps you thinking about it long after you've finished it. This 4-parter is one of those.

I really enjoyed their realization of how much they loved each other after all the shit that had gone down. (It was kind of scary,though,that this kind of "separation could have happened after only 4 years!)

What I really liked was her recalling the events of their initial joining as they went to sleep as he reveled in the comfort of hearing them. Very sweet,after peeling off all the bullshit that had happened in the last year.

The description of his going to reacquire her rings,and her finding them on the table just as she was getting ready to run also stood out.

I really liked this story,although kind of long,especially the romantic rejoining at the end.

God bless little Dale.

To keep my interest. Found myself skimming through.

I am actually one of your biggest fans...BUT this story just didn't do it. It was well written and I didn't mind the length...BUT how in the hell can he take her back! After what she did to him - Oh Wait, it wasn't her fault. The blow jobs, the screwing of his enemy on top of him and then the gangbang and beating and lying about it!!! No way can you take a woman like this back. Thanks for the story.

Anal sex. Yes. Oral sex. Absolutely. Vaginal sex. No way in Hell. When I got back with the rings. I would have taken her back to the backyard. Watch as she put the rings back on her fingers where they belonged. Then I would have put a bullet through her skull at point blank range between her eyes. The End.

"My sister? Did it have to be my sister?" – At least he didn’t do it in front of you and rub your nose in it! And it was your SISTER’S way of paying him back for giving YOU another chance!

“You had to know I didn't have protection." – Well, SHE certainly knew, and chose not to say anything!

Although I lean towards BTB, I;m not against EARNED reconciliation, and I do believe this one was earned, and I certainly don't condone murder, which was really the only other option here.

What still sticks in my craw though, is that after all the other crap, and after they had come to SOME sort of agreement, she threw that gang bang in his face and LIED to protect his attackers. I think I would have just left her to live her life on the run, always looking over her shoulder and never seeing her family again.

"I'm sorry, but I had to. They threatened me.” – That’s crap; what could they do? If she told the truth they’d be in jail, 2 or 3 of them dealing with angry wives!

"They were available. I knew they'd go along." – So, she WAS trying to deliberately hurt him!

"My only one.” – Earlier she said it was her “smallest” thong that at implies more than one.

“I'd denied you sex for six months, just to punish you” – What was she punishing him for? I don’t think it was ever said.

You sort of stole the ending from your “Danielle’s Revenge Redux”!

but I read the whole thing. Like you can't not look at a car wreck. I can't figure out a good critique of this story only to say that it was disturbing to me and I didn't like it. Good grammar, pace and all that. Still I'm left with, why bother?

entertaining. Thanks for the effort. A big old 5 !!

I loved the writing and really started hating the story but couldn't keep from reading.

Solid 4 stars. I loved it!

There r a few inconsistencies But who cares. Good interesting story. I Liked the ending😃

Personally I believe she deserved death. Reconciliation is a fairy tale until the next betrayal. They only get smarter at doing it. Loved what he did to the lovers. I didn't think of the stun gun/ tazer though.

I can imagine an ending like that after they got away from the place of their core issues. She may have needed a bit of therapy (but I think the wilderness therapy did the trick). Great ending to the original story! THANKS

A story about a marriage with a truly fucked up relationship that seemed very real. Both the husband and wife were mentally disturbed. Sadly, ending with them bringing a child into the world leaves me with dread.