All Comments on 'Foreign Escapades'

I really feel that the first person point of view is most suited for erotic stories as it is so much more intimate than the third person pov. Unfortunatly few stories are written that way. You used 'I' a great deal to start the sentences, as in 'I tilted my head...' when you could start the sentence like this: 'Tilting my head to give him better access, I let out a breathy, "yes." Also starting a sentence with 'As he/she/I did " " helps to make it less repetive.

Hope this helps,keep writing...

"This was good. Yes."

Typical foreign love story; no twists or turns.