Cate's Struggles

I curled up to her, my head on her breast, and stroked her lovingly as she struggled to breathe.

"Yo—your mouth felt so delicious to my body, to my pussy. Lord, I had so many sensations going through me that I never wanted it to end, and they kept on blowing up in me, meeting like a bunch of wild sex maniacs in my body, but god, I loved it. Thank you, Cate, thank you," she said, pulling me harder into her breast.

"I'm glad you did want me to shave," she said after we'd realigned our bodies. "When can I feel yours like that?"

"Whenever you want," I quickly told her.

"Now, then. God, now, Cate," she laid back suddenly, and started to pull me over her.

If I hadn't been so excited myself, I would have smiled. I would later, I decided, but I was much too anxious to feel her facial lips on my pussy's lips.

Yes, it was just as she had described, but my body, my pussy, remembered it vividly, and welcomed it again. Haley was, loving it too. I was once again feeling the sweetness of the joys we are so able to have. We not only could have many orgasms, but love giving many, too, and if I sensed her correctly, we would have many more. We were perfect for each other, and we quickly learned of it when we loved each other together. Exhausted but both feeling the sweetness of our afterglow, slept as we were, our pussy's where our faces had to have them for the night.

Chapter 22

We had to run, our bladders screaming at us, but afterward, we couldn't wait, and were in bed again loving each other as if we hadn't yet. Once again, exhausted, we cleaned ourselves, then headed for the kitchen, coffee, and breakfast.

"How about we go to the cabin for a few days?" I suggested. Her eyes lit up.

"That sounds good, but, uh, can we..." she asked as if I knew what she wanted. I thought I did. I was right.

After we'd had enough sex to hold her out while we drove, we packed a few things, but not many. On the way, we stopped off and did a little shopping, pretending we'd be anything other than naked, and that included a bikini for her, as well as new shoes for both of us for the cabin and going to the lake. We also stopped to refresh our pantry with some fresh foods.

"I think I love this place. I've had too many fantasies and dreams about coming back, and us making loads of love here, and on the pier too. God, Cate, you have no idea how I wanted you to make love to me when we were on the pier."

"You're probably right. There's no way I could have been wanting to make love to you then, right?" I asked, one eyebrow arched high.

"Yeah, I guess you did. Wish you had. Anyway, now I'll get my wish—I hope."

She got her wish, and so did I. After checking for people being around even if it was night time, we dropped what little we had on, and dove in. It was much different this time than the last time. There was no hesitancy on my part in touching and being touched, or of holding each other and kissing in the water. Our motions kept us warm, our bodies kept our insides boiling hot, but loving how we were teasing each other.

When we finished swimming, and headed back to the pier, I helped her up, but stayed in the water. I also made sure she didn't get away. Holding her legs, and lifting them over my shoulders, my lips found her pussy. This time it was truly surreal, our loving like this. She made as many sounds of pleasure as I made in taking her. She gave me pleasures that she had in her that couldn't wait to come out and be drunk by me. It was forever before I quit licking her luscious lips, and drinking her honeyed love. I was truly lost in my love of Haley.

When I did get up on the pier, we laid there for a while, then Haley had to love me. Climbing atop of me, she pushed her pussy down to my lips again as she bent to take mine. If it was rough on her knees, she didn't complain, and I didn't ask if she was all right like that. She loved sex as much as I did, it seemed.

Afterward, I pulled her to lay atop of me and held her.

"I love you, Cate. I love being with you, feeling you, knowing you love me, and god, I love us naked like this."

"I do too. Your body is all my body wants to feel—all of you, from the tips of your toes to the top of your head. You make my body drunk for you, honey."

"Mm, I love that. I never thought I'd be this way with anyone. That thought never came to mind, only what my mother had me believing what it was that I should do, to be like she was. This is so much better. At least that's what my heart tells me...and, oh, yes, my pussy too. It adores being like this with you," she giggled.

Back in the cabin, we showered, and hopped in bed, and made love for a long time.

Chapter 23

Waking up, the first thing on our minds was making love again. After that, it was coffee, then breakfast, and all the time naked as we both loved to be. Clearing the dishes, I stepped up behind her and wrapped my arms around her. One arm went to her opposite breast, my forearm under the near one. My other arm searched out her pussy. My hand tugged gently on it, a couple of my fingers in her, making sure her ass was firmly against my pussy.

I loved the feel of her body against mine, her ass against my pussy subtly wiggling against me, her sighs of contentment as I kissed and nibbled on her neck. I was aware of how her breast felt to my hand that caressed and alternately kneaded it, when my fingers weren't lovingly pinching her nipple. Those caresses brought more sighs, and the pinches being so sexily soft making her moan as her head moved back against my lips as best it could.

Was I more mature now to be more appreciative of the way one could love, the way I was with Haley and having all of these feelings suffusing my being so fully. They were contradictory, paradoxical: a deep sense of being at peace mixed, blended, with all of these sexual sensations that were so comforting as they stirred me so lustily. And yet, for the present moment, it was the peace that was the greater, but it did not war with the sexual, the sensual within me. My happiness was a feeling of satisfaction with all that was Haley and I, our love, the peace I sensed she also felt.

"Cate, Cate, god, I love what you do to me. I love being with you, loving you, and feeling you love me. You make me so happy," she said, and in a moment I felt her tears on my arm.

My heart swelled with happiness and joy at knowing she did love me so much, loved my love of her, our togetherness as we were. We stayed as we were for a while, my fingers going further into her pussy seeking up toward her front while my thumb lightly flicked at her clit. When she couldn't help but orgasm, I made sure to cup my hand under her, then wiped up to catch as much of her love as I could. Turning her around, I pulled back, and let her watch as I licked her love off of my hand and fingers.

Her eyes flashed with a lust that was deep and burning, then she kissed me hard, her arms making sure I didn't even think of moving away from her. As if I would move. No way. Our bodies, our pussies, pressed into each other until we both had to have each other. We christened our kitchen floor as we rolled about it, first one on top, then the other, both wishing we could go deeper into the lips we were loving, wanting to enter into their moist warmth.

This was our honeymoon, I thought, as did Haley, I was sure. When we weren't loving, or eating regular food, or swimming, or working out, or even dancing naked to drive ourselves mad with the need to love, we did laze about, but always with towels under us, we kept each other so worked up. We even read, Haley some history books she was finding she did love, and me some other books, interested now in Liv's teachings and ideas. That girl was really a smart one, one who wasn't afraid of thinking for herself and going against the common beliefs—or should I say common erroneous beliefs—of our day. Even more was the simplicity with which she taught; that was more than amazing.

But when Haley needed a break, I'd find those sweet lips kissing my tummy, then she'd wiggle her way down and lift one of my legs and help herself to my pussy for a long time. If she'd gotten over her wish to be a submissive, she still wanted to please me, but more, I think she simply loved eating my pussy and drinking of my love of her.

Other times when we weren't making love, Haley would lay her head on my lap, but soon lift up to suckle my nipple as if taking milk from it. She loved doing that too, but then again, so did I. It wasn't unusual for me to soon move to also suckle on her nipple for she did have some sexy breasts that I loved to fondle. We knew we'd have to visit this cabin frequently, we were loving our time in it so much.

"I guess we'd better head back sometime," I said on Thursday night.

"I'd rather not," she said, suckling on my nipple in bed after we'd made wild love once more, her greedy hand telling my pussy she wanted more of it.

"You don't miss the group on Fridays?" I asked.

"Well, now that you mention it, can we go and then come right back until next Friday?" she asked with a devilish grin.

"We could, but you do need to register for your history class."

"Yeah, I guess I do need to improve my mind. Okay, but that's tomorrow. Tonight still has a way to go, and I need your pussy. Come up here, my gorgeous lover."

Mm, my pussy was made to feel very gorgeous as I sat on her face until she'd had enough—that or she felt I'd had more than enough, which was probable. In any event, she did take her time on me, making sure not to have me orgasm too hard in succession. That did put me to sleep like a baby as she held me to her breast as I'd often held her.

"I love you so much, Cate," I heard her whisper as she combed my hair with her fingers, and pulled me tightly against her.

That was a switch, but I loved it; she had a nice cushion to her breast that made my cheek love where it was.

Chapter 24

It was an eclectic crowd at the club: it seemed that there were a few more older women than usual, and perhaps more in the middle aged grouping too. When we walked in, Jade called to me.

"You're with the new girl now, huh?"

"Haley? Yes, and good evening to you, Jade."

"Hey, just trying to keep everybody straight," she grinned. "How've you been, girl?"

"Decent, how about you? Making a ton of money?"

"Not so much. Maybe Evelyn needs more and pushes the upkeep of her to where this place needs to provide more."

"Uh-huh. I can tell that you're advertising more by the size of the crowd."

"Okay, smart ass. Hey, ever hear anything?" she asked quietly, knowing I'd know what she was referring to.

"Not at all. You?"

"Just that they think they've moved out of town. That's what I heard a few girls saying among themselves. If it's true, it's probably someplace where they're not known. Just wanted to touch base with you. You want your regular?"

"Yes, and thanks again, Jade."

"Hell, girl, I'm probably still in your debt. Paying you back is hell on me," she fibbed in her best manner, a wry look on her face to add emphasis to the fiction.

Haley already having been greeted, I had my turn of hugging and kissing, and waving at some others. After some talk, Haley and I did some dancing.

"You are much better now," Haley praised me, but then again, the slightest improvement would have been much better, so I didn't take it to heart.

"You've been dancing, I see," Penny said, augmenting Haley's comment, and making me wonder if I had truly improved that much.

"Just a little. Only enough to soothe Haley's need for it."

"She's much better, don't you think?" Haley pushed for more compliments.

"Actually, you are," Caryn, one of those who never would think to lie, said.

"Thank you, Caryn. You all have been a wonderful influence on Haley."

"Uh, yeah, sure we have," Mary said, and that led to guffaws by one and all that were nearby.

"You know, it's true," Ariel said in that soft voice of hers. "We did tell Haley what a wonderful girl you were, and she should go and make you happy because you were making all of those puppy eyes at her."

Much more sniggering at that, but I didn't mind it. It was something new to me, to belong to a group who were as homogenous as this one was, as happy and fun loving in the best of ways. They had their fun, and I learned what it was to be a part of them.

"We're going to have a get-together at my place tomorrow starting at lunch if you and Haley can make it," Eleanore advised me. "Think you can?"

Looking at Haley, and seeing her wish to say yes, I nodded.

"Noon-ish,huh?" I needlessly asked.

"That's it, bring your own fork and napkin," she joked.

* * * *

After our hugs and kisses as if we'd not seen each other recently, we all sat about and chatted as Paula brought out some finger sandwiches and drinks she had ready. There was much talk as we ate, but finished, and relaxing, the talk changed, becoming more serious.

"There's so much we don't know," Sally, Ariel's partner, said.

Sally was a professor at the nearby college.

"Not knowing what life is makes for some difficult thoughts, odd feelings of what we are, or might be, or not be, that you're not used to thinking of," she went on. "That has to mean we really don't know what we are, though nobody acts like we don't know. Ask most anyone what life is, and they'll look at you like you're nuts."

That was pretty much the truth as far as I knew, but I never asked anyone so I couldn't say for a fact.

"As far as I know, that's the truth," Eleanore seconded Sally. "We really don't seem to know what life is, or why, other than it's a lot like us, or we're a lot like it, or something like that, but in very different ways, as far as our inquisitive minds are now seeing or thinking."

"How so, Jabs?" Caryn asked.

"Honestly, I've not read that much on it, so I can't say. Sally, Cate, either of you have something on this?"

"Not me, other than that I believe it's true, or pretty close to it, which means Liv was right-on whenever she spoke about the god of the bible." Sally then looked at me.

"I don't have any facts either, but I have read a few books about it written by people researching it in various ways. According to them, life, as we think about it, simply started, but exactly how and why, they can't say with certainty. What they think is a fact is that it started a couple of billion years ago, or so, and that it took a long time developing to be what it is now, or making us what we are now. Liv was right in saying we're all atoms that breathe, eat, and drink other atoms, at least basically. There's a lot more to it than that, but for starters, that's it.

"That all means that the bible is incorrect too, this stuff about making Adam, then Eve; she was cloned from him as described in the bible, but whoever wrote this didn't know about cloning back then. 'Bone of my bones, flesh of my flesh,' was actually DNA of my DNA. We're nothing more than atomic molecules that became cells, and then multi-cells, and somewhere in between maybe, we split into different types of cells, then progressed from there. DNA makes a shambles out of the bible's account."

"By comparing our DNA to that of other beings, or creatures, huh?" Arial asked.

"Pretty much, and even more, by comparing what DNA we used to have in common, and when," I added. "Since they believed we are related, they've looked at DNA and seen where at one time we used to have similar batches of the same code that are no longer used. When we evolve or mutate, apparently the useless code just dies, but much of it doesn't leave. Our old code that is no longer needed is still there, and we can see where we had it in common at one time or another with various other creatures. From that, they estimate how much time past since we diverged as they do with fossils. There doesn't seem much doubt that we evolved and weren't created as if out of whole new cloth as Genesis says."

"And if we don't blow ourselves away, we may live to figure it all out," Penny said sarcastically. We all had to smile at that. "But doesn't that leave us wondering why we are as we are? If we have a purpose?"

"Yeah, it can, can't it?" Eleanore asked as we all did now.

"Liv was right when she said those New Testament church father guys were like little children who were too smart, but really had no knowledge, or more, no research ability. They could have figured it out, but instead they were like that Pliny guy who wrote the confusing movements of the sun and planets around the earth. They accepted that for a long time without checking on their foundation, and both came up wrong as could be. It seems the worst of it is that they kept us all believing a lot of things for two thousand years. They were good PR people. Well, at least their book was large enough to keep anyone confused—other than Liv, that is," I said.

"Actually, Liv did give credit to those who today more than question things, but from what I've read, none of them put it together like Liv did, but again, she only put it together for lesbians like Caryn" Eleanore said.

"So, if we don't have a purpose like the bible indicates, or as other religions do, what is our purpose?" Mary asked. "Has anyone asked that yet—other than religious or philosophical types, that is?"

There was no response to that for a while, but then Anise asked: "Did Liv say anything about it?"

"Liv wondered about it a lot, but she couldn't come up with anything. Most of her efforts were on helping lesbians who were in need of knowing the real facts were that the bible had wrong, " Paula said.

"We talked about it some, but neither of us had a good idea about it. It's a real mystery," Eleanore added.

Once more everyone was quiet until Eleanore asked me about it.

"How about it, Cate? Anything you have on it?"

Thinking a moment, I began. "As you say, Eleanore, it's a mystery. I've thought about it, but it's difficult."

"Where do you start on something like that?" Penny asked.

"I've always tried to go back to what must be the origins of it all. There may or may not be the equivalent of a God somewhere in the mix, but like Liv, I'm sure it isn't with the god of the bible."

"Why do you say that there may be a god?" Eleanore asked, her fingers on her chin pondering it all.

"Right off we have to admit the universe, as we're discovering it, is larger than we thought, and far more complex if the little I've read is an indicator, but you'd know a lot more about that than I do," I stopped to see if Eleanore had more to add.

"Yes, it is, but go on," she put it back on me.

"If we start with what we know for sure, we definitely know that we're conscious—able to be aware of things including ourselves, though where that consciousness comes from, again, nobody knows. But we do know for sure that we're conscious. We also know that we think, and most of us actually hear ourselves thinking if I'm right, at least I do," I said and smiled.

"I never thought of that," Sally said, also smiling.

"Anyway, whilst we think, we have no idea what the process for it is. We can trace its workings in the brain, and that's from MRIs, or such as that, that show activity in particular parts of the brain, but to see the actual thought process, no one has yet, and I doubt they ever will.

"And lastly, or nearly so, we're all intelligent, at least in this room, and outside of it, most everyone else is to a particular degree or other. None of those three things, along with what life is, have been answered, and these last three may never be answered. But all four of them have to have begun someplace, and the only beginnings we know of is from those atoms I mentioned the last time," I stopped.

"So are you saying that atoms think, or are aware of themselves?" Caryn asked.

"Something is, though I can't say what," was all I could plainly say. "No one has any other answers other than the religious or philosophical types, and they have no proofs of what they say. What we have to do is to strip religious and philosophical thinking completely, and begin to wonder from what we positively know, and what our beginnings—as best we know them—might be. Now we can go further than atoms to the particles in the nucleus of them, of protons and neutrons, and then we have quarks, and they're held together by gluons and some other things that I guess Eleanore can tell us, but I think that considering atoms as the starting point for simplicities sake will do it, but what we'll get out of it, well..." I shrugged and grinned.