Getting to Know Her Ch. 02

I smiled up at her and the lust in her eyes was like nothing I had ever seen before. She wanted this bad. I gave her a small nod and she began rotating her hips back to withdraw a few inches before pushing back in again.

I've read any number of stories on this site where a guy and a girl do something like this for the first time and its made to sound like something straight out of a porno. I don't know. Maybe we're uncoordinated or something, but it was far more like two virgin teenagers trying to do it for the first time. There was some fumbling as she tried to smoothly withdraw and then gently push back in. I likewise didn't know whether to help or just remain still.

We had plenty of lube and there wasn't any painful friction, it was really more my poor spinchter muscles being put to the test while being poked and stretched in completely new ways. It was, to be honest, a little awkward and a little more painful than the initial penetration. While I put this down to our collective inexperience in wielding a strap-on, it didn't change the fact that this wasn't exactly the greatest sex experience ever. It certainly was a far cry from the 'pain turned to pleasure' magic that so many seem to describe.

Little by little she picked up speed as she found a bit of rhythm that pleased her. Her eyes were closed now and her head was lolling back in pleasure. Small moans were escaping her throat as she thrust into me and I could hear the soupy squelching of her pussy as she pushed all the way into me and her attachment pressed into her.

She was fully into it now and encouraging me with every thrust. "Oh yes, oh my love. Oh this is so good. Oh this feels so perfect....oh, thank you my love. So good. Ohh cum with me lover I love fucking you girlfriend. Please cum for me. Cum for me while I fuck you."

After a bit more of that she collapsed on me and shuddered through what was clearly an amazing orgasm. The sounds she made and the length of time she spasmed through it was like nothing I had seen before. She actually seemed to fight for breath for a second it was so intense.

Of the whole evening, her best moment was pretty much my worst for two reasons. The primary reason was that as she collapsed upon me and lost control of herself, she had unintentionally jammed the dildo into a painful position. This of course caused me to gasp out, which I'm sure she interpreted as me cumming with her, but which was in reality probably one of the more painful moments of the entire experience.

Second, and maybe just as importantly, I hadn't actually cum. I was good and hard throughout most of the process, but I didn't really feel as though I was working towards an orgasm and obviously the finish as I described above, sorta cut my desire.

My wife clearly didn't notice this and as she came down from the throes of her passion she snuggled up against me and returned to the soft kissing and caressing that we had begun with. After awhile she again thanked me for making her fantasy come true.

She had always wanted to 'fuck her girlfriend' (her specific words). I assured her how happy I was to have made her so happy and told her I was happy to be her girlfriend.

Nothing was said that time about how little pleasure I had really gotten out of the whole experience, but for a first time anyway, I was content to chalk it up to making her happy and left it at that.

*****What came next *****

Over the subsequent six months or so we continued to experiment with our 'lesbian' sex nights which were becoming more common than 'ordinary' sex nights. My wife clearly loved this form of sex most of all and, in what can only be termed an ironic turn of events (or maybe not), often asked Stacy if she could use the strap-on as part of the lovemaking. I say ironic because it often left Stacy in the odd position of using the well worn arsenal of female reasons for effectively saying 'no' without saying 'no.'

We did try it about half a dozen more times including trying a couple of different positions. While the movements did become a bit more fluid with additional practice, each time we ended up with pretty much the same results as I described above. My wife had a tremendous, head-spinning orgasm, and I had nothing, except maybe a slightly sore bottom and a bit of frustration. While it didn't seem funny at the time, I guess I shared a bond with the many women who face having sex with a lover that can't satisfy them.

Eventually my wife noticed that I didn't cum with her. Maybe I hadn't 'faked it' well enough, maybe she had noticed before and just hoped things would get better. Whatever the case, that night our usual loving post-sex afterglow, cuddle and pillow-talk took a different turn.

After some questioning I admitted I wasn't getting much out of the strap-on sex and while I was willing to indulge it from time to time, I wanted her to understand that it wasn't something that was working for me.

Her reaction and her defensiveness told me that this hurt her. "Where did this come from all of a sudden? I thought you loved this as much as I did? We were so good together. What happened?"

I'm sure no one wants to read the details of what came next. Most wouldn't call it a true argument, but it was definitely a case where two people saw the same things in very different ways. In the end, whatever one wants to call it, feelings were hurt and suffice to say, things were different from that point forward.

In the weeks that followed, as the fates would have it, we both had significant job pressures which in my wife's case included a good bit of travel. Additionally, I had caught a fairly severe case of the flu and generally felt crummy and lethargic. We didn't get to spend much quality time together and our relationship, already a little fragile, soured a good bit more as neither of us were really taking care of each other's needs.

About that time, when our relationship was at a low point, my wife was assigned to a big project on the west coast (San Fran, to be precise). It was a excellent opportunity for her (she's a consultant) and one we both knew she had to take. I had some misgivings about her being away considering where our relationship stood, but I think we both welcomed a little time apart to figure out where we were and where we wanted to go.

Initially, she was away three weeks. It was spring time and my health had finally improved so I immersed myself in being Stacy every evening and weekend she was gone. My make-up and grooming skills were progressing and I added a little to my wardrobe. I went out once as Stacy to do basic errands, and went to the movies a couple more times.

Each time went really well and my confidence grew. No one ever knew, at least as far as I could tell. My comfort with being Stacy increased and it was during that time I first accepted that the Stacy side of me was a part that was important to me and one I wanted to continue.

At the end of three weeks my wife was home for a long weekend, but would need to return the following Monday. Although we had talked most every night while she was gone, I was excited to see her and looked forward to some time together. However, almost from the there was an undertone of awkwardness that I couldn't quite understand at first.

Guilt turned out to be the answer. The final night we "had a talk" during which she confided in me that while she was away she had 'made a friend' and had strap-on sex with 'a real woman.' She said she liked it and needed time to explore the 'true lesbian' side of her sexuality. She emphasized that she still loved me, but wanted to understand this part of her sexuality and hoped I could accept that.

Somehow I wasn't surprised by this and while I felt a range of emotions from anger, to loss, to resignation, I managed to accept her comments for what they were. She was searching for something within her sexuality, much as I was, and while I didn't like it, I knew where she was coming from.

In response I shared with her how I had been spending my time to which she said she was 'not surprised.' After some further discussion, which I would have described as pretty reserved given our respective revelations, we decided to separate until her project ended which was slated to run about six more months. We agreed that during that time we could each see who we wanted and do what we wanted, but at the end we agreed to make a stay together /stay apart decision.

Again, I'm sure no one wants to read all the specifics. Suffice to say, some unfortunate things were said and there were a lot of tears that night as she packed to go. I felt like we parted as friends, but was deeply uncertain if we would remain lovers despite our love for one another.