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Click hereI went to sleep that night with a melting pot of emotions. First, and foremost, I was anxious. I had no idea what was going to happen and, because of my self-imposed rules, I had little control. I was scared, because I didn't know how my mom would act around me now. Did I scare her off just when I really needed her the most? At the same time I felt excited, mostly by my strong declaration to change for the better. But also, of course, was that little image of my mother stuck in the back of my brain.
Regardless of whose eyes I am looking through, our relationship had changed. She may not know the whole story, but at the very least, she has tasted my cum. I may have misinterpreted her reaction in the kitchen, but the rational part of my brain suggests that at least KNOWS . She knows that I masturbate. She knows I did it at her kitchen island, and for whatever reason it turned me on.
When I imagined asking her to help me get a body (and maybe a personality too), the butterflies in my stomach increased ten-fold.
The entire day was so surreal, that my mind became completely spent. My mind was so overworked with the day's activities that I had lost sight of everything else. I didn't realize I hadn't even said goodnight to my parents. To be honest, I wasn't even sure what time it was.
As I started to fall asleep I got the beginnings of an erection, while dreaming of the conversation I would be having tomorrow. I was too tired to do anything about it now. I simply wrapped my fingers around my shaft, gave it the slightest tug and slid up against my pillow, imagining it was my mother's smooth ass as I fell asleep.
This author turned out to be one of those "one and done" authors seeing as this "first" chapter was written over 4 years ago. It's too bad as this story had true potential and the author showed that he was a pretty good writer.
What the hell hedonist_at_heart! Where is part 2??
The kitchen scene where the sister asks her mom to taste the eclaire was the hottest thing I have ever read (so far :)). I like to think the two aren't in cahoots, but rather the sister is seducing the mom on her brother's behalf (only because she wants to see her brother squirm)
What seperates the good stories from the boring ones are those that build up tension before the climax. Your story does that well. Keep writing!
When are we going to read the rest of the story??? Will mom and michelle combine to have him for lunch or does it just die there??? Will Dad get involved and have the whole family in an orgy and learn to have fun when and where they feel their urges surface??? Write more soon and this time make it hotter than ch.01...
Yes there were a few errors, but anyone who couldn't follow the story need to take a reading course. Was disappointed that Chapter 2 and more were not already posted - hurry please.
Good job so far. Critics you don't need. Rarely reply but your's was worth it. Mystery needs to unfold gradually and give us hope it is going to get better and better soon.
Tasting your cum was a neat unique addition with good responses from the gals so far.
Now that the main characters are laid out and some background work has been done, I hope that the story will get to more than just masturbating and watching.
Mom, daughter and son could have a good time fucking and sucking while dads away all of the time.
It could have been a 100 rating but what may seem to others to be minor errors such as "but" instead of "butt" just takes away from the eroticism. It makes one have to back up and read again to make sure of the meaning. Of course the pure wankers probably really don't mind - they just skip over the errors because they're not that educated anyway.
Ignore the comments about the errors. Yes, there are one or two, but they don't detract from the story. You're setting the scene well, but a little more pace would be good.
I'm looking forward to the next chapter.
Thanks
Grow up on Mars, did you? People write shit like this because they simply repeat what they think they hear and then worse, never ask themselves what they are writing. You also have big problems with commas and apostrophes. You must have been traumatized by a small curved line as a child.
Even on the first line. The "date night" belongs to both parents, surely? So it's "parents' date night". You don't even know the difference between "your" and "you're".
Learn to write before you try to make a story.
Ver good start. Looking forward to Ch.02. Thanks. You have set the hook well dear author, very well indeed.