All Comments on 'Her First White Man'

This needs to be edited for content. The writing is like sex for the first time. The guy that wrote this climaxed too fast. The rest of the story kept repeating itself. Seemingly, nothing new or eventful..... it just kept going and going. This reader didn't get taken for a ride. More like "uhh, get out!" I was "involved" in the story - then the person who wrote this lost me.

Good story,but you need to proof read it,as their are many spelling errors.............but maybe you were just too excited trying to write this story.......I would have.

Like the other person said there are some editing problems here. But first, the beginning and rug scene were awesome. You did a great job there. Shit can everything else between that and when you described the first night in detail. Describing the whole relationship made the ending (the 1st night) anti-climatic. And cut down on the Viagra too. lol jk

Please continue even tho you begin fucking the younger sister, too. You can make it up with her by breeding her with your white baby, and then perhaps you can develop a 3-some with the two nigga girls, giving them both babies.

The story could of been better! Said the same thing over and over. Very annoying.

I like it a good boy girl story.

Although I gave it a 5, there is room for improvements

From personal experience, when a couple of friends begin having sex on a daily basis (as stated in your story), a deeper bond developes. Yet in the story, she only wanted to be friends. I can't see that, especially being that the sex is great for both.

I'd like to see a sequel with her becoming pregnant (being that it is always raw sex) and the sex gets even hotter or she gives in to him and move in so that the sex can become even more frequent and exciting.