All Comments on 'His Cajun Moon Ch. 01-02'

Good start, I enjoyed the story line very much.Keep writing. You do need an editor to fix grammatical errors and spelling mistakes.

for the ladies SO GET U AND EDITOR AND FIX THESE CHAPTERS UP SO WE CAN LOOK FORWARD TO THE NEXT TEN TO SIXTEEN CHAPTERS THAT ARE COMING

Look, I love this story...the mistake were minimal and I will continue to read your story with or without mistakes

People will be harsh, like the person who wrote in capital letter should realize that is SHOUTING. Please continue your story for us who are willing to overlook certain grammatical errors.

reverso.net is a great place to start.... and even for dialect Cajun french, it helps to have the spelling a little closer.

I think the story line is interesting.... good luck with it, I am looking forward to more!

We will find you if you don't! This is one of the best beginnings I have ever read. I can't wait for the next installment.

This story is off the chain! Don't make us wait too long for the follow up chapters

This was a warm up, I hope any way. This story was really great, regardless of the mistakes. Hopefully you update real soon.

You have got my attention. Keep writing.

If you keep writing like this you will quickly become a fan favorite. Please don't keep us waiting .

For your first stoyr its awesome..I love every minute and every second of it. Please keep writing more...thank you

I had fun reading your story. So few authors realize that funny and sexy can be a good combination, or maybe they don't have the gift for it that you have. I liked this so much that I ignored the misused words, but a good editor will help you become a better writer. Looking forward to the next chapter!

Yves

Your characters and storyline are interesting, cute and funny.

Please get an editor or just read over your draft to maintain a smooth story flow.

I had trouble a few times understanding the story because of spelling or duplicated phrases.

Thanks for this story. It's a great first effort. I eagerly look forward to its update.

vt

i love your story and the way u write ,yes u have little mistake here and there but that ok with me and i enjoy reading your story.

i enjoy it so far but i cant help but think why in all the stories set in this genre the man has to have such careful need for the mate, why cant we have a different sort of story where the man takes what he wants. That would be a welcome change.

As a person from New Orleans, I found myself cringing at quite a few things in the story, particularly lines spoken by native New Orleanians. Despite the stereotypes that are out there, we don't speak like that at all. While you may hear an occasional stranger call you "boo," "baby," or "sweetheart," you don't hear any of the other things said. (In 26 years, I have never heard someone addressed as Mon Ami or Cher. Honestly, That use of language is usually found in your lesser educated populations WELL outside of the city.)

That aside, I would have loved to see more detail in your story. What was the city like? What did the hotel look like? What did the room look like? Have you ever been to Hotel Monteleone? It is an amazing hotel- absolutely beautiful. Tell the reader this.

As far as your editing goes, I agree with the other comments. You need an editor. There were a few inconsistencies, spelling errors, and grammatical errors that could have prevented with an editor or by simply reading the story aloud (it sounds dumb but it works).

Your use of italics confused me. You may consider using them to distinguish between people talking to themselves (talking to their wolf, etc). They should also be used to signify a different language being spoken- Mon Ami, Cher, etc all should be in italics because they aren't English.

I promise that I am not trying to nitpick, only to offer the feedback you wanted.

I would work on your description. The description seemed like just another stereotypical black woman sex story. I almost didn't read this because of it and that would have been a shame because I really enjoyed this story. It is a good story, I wish it were a book because I want to finish it and i lack patience,

Cant wait for the mext. follow the story in you and it will come write its self. plz hurry i cant wait for the next ch.

Great start!!!

Hey there great story you got there. I would just like to give the correct pronunciation of a few French words you used. First one it's "bonjour" instead of "bonjoun", ma belle is pronounced "ma" like the Italian "ma" for mother, you git the the belle right. I am still thinking of how to help you with the "monsieur " pronunciation, will get back at ya as soon as I figure an easy way to do it.

It's simply great! Just one thing it's "Monsieur" in french for Sir :)

I'm engrossed and plan to read the rest of these, but wanted to leave you a comment about some stumbling-blocks I'm already struggling with.

You need an editor. Badly. Also, the shift in PoV is jarring.

If these issues were resolved I'd be ready to buy this story on Amazon. There simply aren't enough erotic/romance fiction titles available with a black female protagonist. Thanks.

I couldn't help but notice the ties to Princess and The Frog 😝

Love me a Cajun accent. Haven't meet a Cajun man yet, but I enjoy the story.

I really like the story concept but I'm struggling with finishing the story because of all the grammar and spelling errors. It's really hard to gloss over the fact that you need an editor.

Love the start ...Ray is hot