by babygrrrl
i really liked your story got me really horny. I love being with an older man and calling him daddy. Cant wait for another story!
Sexy scene, good, hod dialog and some great Daddy/babygirl talk. Keep it up and think of some new places your characters can go.
Though I agree that you need to work on your writing abilities, I LOVED the story itself! Don't get discouraged by the ones who are over-critical, just take your time and make sure you're using words in-context.
For those leaving negative feedback on the story itself...c'mmon guys.. the category is Incest/TABOO! Fucking the neighbor's daughter certainly falls into that category (at least where this little girl grew up)! It's the imagery that matters ...the Fantasy! I for one love my Daddy/Daughter fantasies but that doesn't mean I'd screw my father...it means I love my "Daddy" balling me until I scream.
Keep up the good work babygrrrl!
This was a half way decent read but I was really disappointed because when I choose a story out of the incest category I want to read about a real daddy fucking his own daughter not about a neighbor pretending to be a Daddy fucking his neighbor's daughter. It should have been in either erotic couplings or first timers.
What a great story! You have the Daddy/BabyGirl scenerio down pat!! I love the daddy/little girl role!!! Keep the story going babygirl, keep it going and let's see how naughty daddy's girl can get!!
I loved it Babygirl!!
what a babygirl craves, dreams of, and needs. You captured her needs (they sound as if you have lots of personal knowledge) but I thought you could have developed them better. This story was more like your fantasy, spotty. You could have made it so much more realistic and wonderfully believable. Daddy/babygirl is one of the strongest of all bonds. You could have developed that into a very strong story line. As it was, it was still HOT. Don't be discouraged, babygrrrl.
Daddy
The words are spelled right - but they are the wrong words.
You used quite for quiet, and waste for waist.
You confuse consistently plural and possessive forms.
Example - daddies is plural, you used it where it should say daddy's.
Learn the difference, and proofread!
Daddy got soo hard reading this and thinking about you. will we get more stories from you?