All Comments on 'One Tease Too Many'

by writeonmylips

Sort by:
  • 1 Comment
jaldinsiconjaldinsiconabout 10 years ago
interesting story

the only thing i would add is the presence of others people while he is observing her, cause he would be hyper sensitive about others seeing him while he scopes..... then while he is in the bushes, make it so he worries about the leaves crushing beneath his feet, but the closer he gets to her the more the outside world is shut out, and only the two of them is present......

Anonymous
Our Comments Policy is available in the Lit FAQ
Post as:
Anonymous