Operation Fit Bird

"Here, let's have that, Bogart," said Ant.

Will handed the joint back. "You're gonna need to bring a charger the way you're going with that," he said, nodding at Ant's phone.

"Aww, poor little Willy's got no one interested," Ant teased, playfully pushing Will.

"Shut up, knob head," Will snapped back. It was true, though. On Friday he couldn't wait to escape Louise after their frankly weird shag but now, with his mate apparently well in there with a new girl Will wouldn't have minded some kind of contact with the girl who had been so keen to sleep with him. Not that he was prepared to initiate contact, of course. They hadn't exchanged numbers but will was sure Louise could have asked someone for his. Ridiculous as it seemed, he felt he might have been used. Ant's phone chirruped and he laughed again at the text's contents. Will resumed his absent-minded, stoned staring and contemplated life as an object, simply there to satisfy someone's carnal desires. He didn't think he'd ever treated a girl badly but he was probably wrong. In the past he'd convinced himself that if he'd made it quite clear to girls if he wasn't interested in a relationship and it was just a quick fling then that was him covering his back but maybe that didn't really cut the mustard. The truth was he wasn't really interested in Louise, but that wasn't really the point. Now, if it'd been Julia instead of Louise things would have been different but Will was beginning to lose faith in the idea of he and Julia being a possibility.

"Looks like I'm on for a shag later, just gotta wait for her parents to go out," Ant said, rubbing his hands together.

"Great, I'm so pleased for you," Will replied glumly.

"Fuck's sake," Ant said. "You got laid on Friday, it's not my fault you were such a crap shag that she doesn't want to know you."

"It wasn't me that was crap," Will said defensively, suddenly chilled by the possibility that Ant was right and Louise's silence was down to his poor performance. He quickly banished the thought and put it down to the weed. She'd been way too eager, it hadn't been him at all.

"What's your problem, then? You couldn't wait to get out of there the other night now you're moaning she's not hitting you up."

"I'm not. I suppose I just thought she might have been in touch since we had sex and everything."

Ant snorted in derision. "Cos you always make sure you text a lass you've gone with to say thanks?!"

Ant was right. Now he thought about it he might not always have followed up with promised texts or calls the next day or whatever, but still.

"You're just jealous I'm getting some and you're not. Now stop being a pussy and skin up, Bogart."

Will rolled his eyes. "That's not what Bogart means. It's when you hold onto a joint too long."

Ant raised his eyebrows. "Do I look like I give a fuck?" he asked blankly. "Hurry up, anyway. I need to have a shower before I go and see her."

"So what am I gonna do all afternoon?" Will asked petulantly.

Ant looked pityingly at him. "I don't give a shit, I'm getting laid. Have a wank over Julia or summat."

A mild feeling of panic spread through Will's body. This wasn't the way round it was supposed to be. He was the one with the prospects, wasn't he?

Will sat at his desk trying to motivate himself to begin his essay on Beckett's 'Waiting for Godot'. Each time he went to type an opening sentence something held him back. The weed he'd smoked with Ant that afternoon had worn off so that wasn't the source of his inertia. Neither was the self-loathing after he'd taken Ant's advice at face value and knocked one out over that picture of Julia in her knickers. It was a general sense of unease, that he'd done something wrong that was going to come back to bite him. He'd more or less rationalised the Louise business, telling himself he was being stupid, the last thing he wanted was for a girl he wasn't into to be after him so he'd come to terms with the fact that she might have actually used him for sex, pretty much the way he'd used her, in fact. His toes curled involuntarily at the memory of coming inside her but she'd assured him they were protected so he managed, pretty successfully, to park that little worry somewhere in the depths of his mind. Will hoped his problem wasn't that Ant seemed to have potentially met a girl he'd want to spend time with because that would mean he was feeling jealous and that was idiotic. The thing that annoyed Will most about Ant, after all, was the way he seemed to try to hold Will back, putting down his talk of university and finding a life beyond their northern town. For the first time Will was getting a taste of what it was like to be the one left behind and he didn't like it. Over the weekend he'd more or less abandoned any hope of pulling Julia, convincing himself that she was just a flirty girl and was probably like that with all blokes. He was pretty sure that her absence at the party was because she was off shagging someone, as he had been, and he was sure he'd be better off forgetting about her. Of course on the other hand, there had been her suggestive 'still curious' statement and Mark's insider info. Will contemplated another quick wank to clear his mind and facilitate work but, looking at the time, decided it probably wasn't a great idea.

He anxiously gnawed at his lip. 9.30 pm and his essay was due the following afternoon. Unlike Vladimir and Estragon he didn't have all the time in the world and there was something to be done. He jumped out of his chair and did ten press-ups and twenty sit-ups then, panting slightly, his heart rate up, pushed his knuckles into his eyes to try to force himself to concentrate. His vision went black then flickers of light began to appear. It seemed to have worked, as his breathing relaxed and his eyes focused his opening sentence came to him. Just as his fingers touched the keyboard his phone buzzed.

Chase & Status playing Apollo Friday nite. Sold out already. We gotta get tickets. Can u ask fit bird?

Will sighed and threw his phone onto the desk. Yes, Ant. I'll just conjure them up shall I?he thought. His mate was right though; that was a gig they couldn't miss. Just how he was going to get tickets was going to have to wait, much like Beckett's protagonists.

It might have been childish but sometimes a kick-about was still the best way to spend a dinner hour and Will and a handful of lads from his year were reliving boyhood fantasies and trying to recreate various classic goals. Having already scored a beauty after he slalomed through the flimsy defence on the left Will was now somewhere around the right wing, pinging crosses into the box as Danny, who had been at Friday's party, attempted to score with a back-heel. Will was enjoying kicking a ball more than he had in months, until a rather less-talented team mate hoofed the ball over a wall and into the road. As they waited for the ball to be retrieved Danny and Will chatted.

"Good to see you on the pitch again mate! Better than netball, eh?" Danny grinned.

"Well, yeah," Will replied nonchalantly, wondering to himself how everyone but him saw being warm, dry, and surrounded by girls a punishment.

"Was good on Friday wasn't it?" Danny asked. "Didn't see you after we were outside, though. You find Jules?"

"Yeah, later on I did. Not for long, though. We didn't stay late." Will wondered if his dalliance with Louise was common knowledge but Danny's question didn't seem loaded in any way.

"Yeah, I didn't see much of her, either," Danny said.

"Where was she?" Will asked, hoping Danny might know something useful.

"No idea, mate. Why, you think you've got a chance?"

Will tried to gauge Danny's tone. Was that meant to suggest he had no chance, or was it an innocent question? He reminded himself he'd decided to forget about her and elected for the fake-laugh-don't-be-so-silly response. "Nah, was just wondering," he said, hoping the flush he felt creeping across his face was masked by the general redness from running around a bit. Frowning almost imperceptibly Danny looked at Will for a second longer than he might normally. He looked up and saw the ball had been retrieved.

"Rooney's overhead kick against City?" Danny suggested, standing up.

Will looked at the Tarmac beneath them. "Maybe not. I feel a Cantona chip coming on though," he said, flipping his collar up.

"Nice one," Danny grinned and jogged off towards the ball. "I'll set up the one-two."

Ten minutes later, on his way to hand in his English essay, Will was waylaid by Kiddy Fiddler.

"I was watching you then, lad," the teacher said. "You really think you're it, don't you? Showing off, chipping goals like you're something special. Well you're not. It looks like you haven't learned your lesson yet so don't expect to be back in my team any time soon."

Kiddy didn't wait for a response. He turned and made his bow-legged way towards the staff room so didn't see just how happy that made Will.

Despite his decision to put Julia out of his mind Will was finding it easier said than done and as Wednesday afternoon approached he was feeling more and more excited at the prospect of seeing her again. He wasn't quite sure what it was about her that he as finding so alluring, apart from the blonde hair, perfect legs, great tits, sense of humour and so on. In the past Will had done pretty well with girls. He was a good looking lad, in good shape, bright, confident, and, despite perhaps wanting for a few inches in height, was a pretty good catch, even if he did say so himself. He might not always have been the perfect gentleman but he certainly knew bigger bastards but, the more he thought about it, the more he realised that he'd never really been the one to do the chasing, the girls had tended to come to him, one way or another. It was true he hadn't exactly been chasing Julia but he was certainly showing a keener interest than normal. There was just a naughty sparkle in her blue eyes and every time he thought about what Mark had told him about the precocious Julia his cock twitched. As he walked towards the school gate that morning he had felt a thrill and as the clock hands in the library next door to the sports hall crept round towards one o'clock those twitches were becoming more pronounced.

The novelty of having a boy in amongst them seemed to have worn off for a good number of the girls and Will attracted much less attention now. His netball skills left a lot to be desired, too. He kept instinctively running with the ball as if it was basketball and this habit was starting to annoy some of his 'E' team mates. For Will, on the other hand, the novelty of being the only boy in a veritable sea of girls wasn't something he was going to become tired of anytime soon. Julia was down the other end of the hall and he'd not had a chance to even say hello as yet but Will found he could content himself with his current companions who were, not only young and female therefore of great interest to him, but also of a similar standard when it came to passing a ball around the court and attempting to land it in a net, provided he could control his urge to run.

"Mis-ter Watson," Miss Cookson's voice rang out. "Are you deliberately trying my patience?" For probably the tenth time in an hour Will had set off on a mazy run, bouncing the ball as he went. "Mr Fiddler will not be amused to hear you're disrupting my class too, you know?"

Will looked at the ground as the girls around him groaned. "Sorry, ma'am. I can't seem to remember not to run," he said meekly. It was a genuine apology. Will didn't like not being good at a sport and he was quickly learning respect for the different skills that netball required.

"You'll have to try harder, won't you? Don't expect to excel here just because you can kick a ball well out on the football pitch. Your lesson in humility is taking a while, isn't it? I can see what Mr Fiddler was referring to when he said how cocky you were."

For the first time Will felt less than happy where he was. Much of the hall had fallen quiet and the games of netball had stopped. All eyes were on him as he received his dressing-down. Over Miss Cookson's shoulder, a few feet away, Julia was making a face at him, trying to make him laugh. He glanced at her then back at the teacher.

"I do hope this isn't for the benefit of the girls, you know. I'd like to think it would take more to impress them than a little clowning around," the teacher continued. Behind her Julia was nodding vigorously.

"No, ma'am," said Will. "I'm not trying to impress anyone."

Julia shook her head and mouthed, "Oh no."

Will cursed Julia for appearing now and seeing him red-faced and, at last, humiliated. He felt the last shreds of his credibility drifting away on the femininely-scented air of the sports hall.

"I think you'd do well to keep a low profile," Miss Cookson said. "I don't want to have to speak to you again."

"Yes ma'am. I will," said Will.

Miss Cookson's whistle blew and as she turned to address the rest of the players somehow Julia's mocking expression fell away in the nick of time to be replaced by a face so innocent it was inconceivable any teacher would be suspicious. That was another skill Will had never mastered. As soon as the games were over a chastised Will scuttled away before anyone, especially Julia, could talk to him. Chase and Status would be playing another time.

Will's confidence had been well and truly sapped. Being squashed like that in front of the one person he needed to impress had left him feeling drained. A series of texts from Ant remained unanswered. The initial inquiries about the gig tickets had morphed into questions about Julia, demands for an additional ticket for Charlotte, and now had descended into insults, threats and an assertion that from now on Will was buying his own weed and getting the bus.

Perhaps the teachers were right. Maybe he was a waster and a show-off, squandering his talent and potential in return for a few laughs and a reputation as a bit of a lad. Will lay on his bed and contemplated the unthinkable -- turning off his phone, iPad and laptop and doing something constructive. He picked up a Thomas Hardy novel -- one that wasn't even on his required reading list -- and vowed to change. From now on he'd stop fucking about and work hard. He thought about Ant on a freezing cold building site surrounded by mouth breathers and shuddered. That university place wasn't a shoo-in and he couldn't, just couldn't, end up in a shitty job, never having experienced what life had to offer.

The novel was holding his attention, which was a good sign. As he read he began to understand a little better the value of reading widely. Ideas that could have made it into his Beckett essay came to him and he found himself jotting things down for future reference. As the pages turned Will saw a future that didn't revolve around getting wasted with Ant and lusting after an unattainable woman. He wasn't constrained by Victorian norms and ideals, he was an intelligent young man with the world at his feet. Maybe this was what his teachers meant when they talked about losing oneself in literature. University wasn't that far months away. If he could retain this feeling, this mindset, then his exams would be something to relish; a challenge to be tackled and rather than a minefield to be negotiated. Will felt good, better than he had in a long time. Perhaps he could even speak to Kiddy about re-joining the football team. On his bedside cabinet his phone vibrated. He ignored it and went back to the book but the phone buzzed again, reminding him someone was trying to communicate. He could leave it, the phone would be quiet now and he could go back to his book. He hadn't read this much in one sitting for a long time. Then again, a quick break couldn't hurt. Will picked up the phone and slid his thumb across the screen.

Hey u, hope ur ok. Wanted to chat this afternoon but u disappeared. Miss Cookson can be a right bitch sumtimes. U busy tomo after school? Wana come to mine for a bit? I can pick u up. Xx

Will's academic-fantasy bubble burst. Julia had invited him to her house. No matter how well Thomas Hardy explored love between social classes the chance to experience it for real was too good to miss. Operation Fit Bird was back on.

Thursday felt like the longest day of Will's life. Lessons dragged and his dinner hour seemed more like three. As 3.30 inched closer Will's stomach began to fill with butterflies. He felt like a child, all excited before a big treat and had to tell himself to calm down, that all it was just an invitation to her house, nothing more. When the bell rang at long last, he jogged to the toilets for a check on his hair and a splash of aftershave, top and bottom, just in case.

Julia was leaning against her little white Range Rover as Will came into the car park. Taking none of the same subjects Will hardly ever saw her apart from on the netball court, and even from a distance she looked good, wearing a tailored grey suit with black tights and shoes, her blonde hair in a simple ponytail, twirling her car keys round a finger.

"Hi," she said with a smile as he approached. "Good day?"

Will cleared his throat so as to be sure he didn't croak. "Hi," he said. "Was okay, dragged a bit."

"Couldn't wait to see me, huh?" she smiled.

Will hesitated for a second to try and decipher any hidden subtext. "Erm, well, ya know."

Julia gave him a grin and stood up straight. In her heels she was a touch taller than him. "Shall we go? You wanna drive?" She handed him the keys and walked round to the passenger door.

The interior of the car was as stunning as the outside and smelled of expensive leather. As Will settled into the bucket seat he realised his hands were sweating. He'd passed his test a year or so before but rarely had the chance to drive. Now he was at the wheel of a footballer's wife's wet dream with the girl of his dreams next to him. Nothing to worry about then. He fumbled about, looking for where to put the key. Thankfully Julia came to his rescue.

"You don't need it. Just press the button," she said breezily and leaned over to fire up the engine.

"Right," he muttered, his incompetence doing little for his confidence.

Julia put her hand on his leg to reassure him. "I've only had it a couple of weeks. Took me ages to work it out, too." She squeezed just above his knee and grinned again. Will grinned back, comforted slightly but now acutely aware of her hand.

"It's a lovely car," Will said once they were safely out of the car park and on their way to the posh end of town. "Smells wonderful."

"Thanks. My dad buys a new one every year. Something to do with tax I think." She looked across. "You smell pretty good too."

Flattered, Will laughed and said, "Thanks. My mum buys that for me once a year, too."

Julia chuckled and fiddled with the car's entertainment system to put on some music. The clearest, sharpest sound Will had ever heard soon came floating from the speakers as Rihanna filled the car. As they drove Julia chatted away, pointing him in the right direction when necessary and told him about her day. Will wasn't sure she had deliberately allowed her skirt to ride up as she crossed her legs but he thought she might well have done. Flirting whilst appearing not to was clearly a talent she had.

"So how come you wanted me to come round?" Will ventured.

"I dunno," Julia said. "Just didn't get the chance to chat yesterday, didn't see you much on Friday, just fancied hanging out. You don't mind, do you?"

"Course not," Will said smoothly.

"Cool," Julia smiled. "Next left."

The next left led to a huge set of iron gates that swung open as the car approached. At the end of a gravel drive sat the kind of house Charlotte's dad could only dream of.