All Comments on 'The Conspiracy Upended'

Great story - I'd like to be the guy.

ejfudd

Good story,maybe a bit unbelievable, but I enjoyed it. Wish I could meet a woman like that.

Good story about a woman transformed, one of my favorite themes.

Lime,

This has the makings of a 100%er for me. If it were mine I would tighten it a bit by trimming it to get to the meat a bit faster. Some of the 'he said' and 'she said's could be dispensed with. Some of the conversations are not quite realistic: friends tend to speak more 'easily' and informally. They don't explain everything. I also noted a couple of words missing in two spots.

Overall it rates higher than most in this catagory, and was enjoyable. If you would like more detailed critique I would be happy to dissect it a bit by pm and show you what I mean.

Very presumptuous for a whipper-snapper, however, I feel honest critique is worth loads more than an 'I really liked it.'

I will certainly read more of your postings.

Candida.

Something in the story rings true.

And that is always a big plus for me.

The epilogue was probably my favorite part. I wish I had thought of that when I got married! :D

There should be a warning at the start of this one...

COLD shower will be required ;-)

Great stuff hon!! (and an excellent sex scene!!)

A firm handed, caring, master and a newly made slave withhen extremely well. Just the right mix of discipline and rewards. As an added bonus, there's no gratitious violence or degradation! Simply two people finding themselves to be very compatabile.

Well done!

Kydreamer

I remember this story as well, as something I read a long time ago. Your stories certainly seem to linger in my mind, so I guess I was a fan and I didn't even know it :)

Great story Lime, wished I had read this before I had read mrssublime's story. Either way both were great reads none the less. There is no greater woman then one willing to give themsleves over to the will of their man, besides I love being called Master or Sir personally. My wife 'er slut' loves the orgasms, not to mention the attention she gets from me.

I think you did a great job of setting up the ultimatum. It set up the rest of the story nicely. The thing I liked best about this story is how easy it is to believe. I could see a true Master taking in a new slut in such a way. The simple command at first building up to the more risque ones is a perfect way of teaching. I agree that it is a perfect blend of rewards with punishment. The imagery mixed with the emotions behind the symbolism is a great balance. The collar was well represented in this story. :-) I truly enjoyed this story and appreciate the realistic insight you give into this lifestyle.

Well-crafted and rolled along nicely, no tree-roots for the reader to trip over, until. . .

(yes, there's always a 'but') . . . Until the epilogue, where you were "sanding" (using a good quality sandpaper) and the "alter", (it was going to be different) and you raised her "vale" (and said goodbye). What was it that made the wheels fall off the story at that very late point?

But really, 4 / 5 for the tale.

Cheers, and thanks for the reading.

Kilroy