All Comments on 'The Exiled One Ch. 02'

both exilers ended up on Main Street leading the parade, TK U MLJ LV NV

Maybe a 2 would have been more accurate; but I am a sucker for happy endings. And while death is sad, it is definitely an ending.

However it seems to go all over the place and finally wound up in heaven.

Hmmm,,, I give it four stars because it had a decent premise but could have been better. I see lots of potential and I hope you keep writing.

An author that captures the true spirit of a husband in a dilemma. The wife cheats, but never loses hope or his commitment to his marriage. In the end, that is what you do. You fight for your marriage you fight for your life partner. Well done story. The ending is perfect none better. Until death do us part, except, both still stayed together after death.. Very nice touch. Partners in life and in after life.... Great job keep writing 5 stars.. should be more

I loved it. ***** Thank you

A happy ending for a change in the LW section

Great job! Looking forward to more of your submissions

Just loved it. Stay on track and don't move around and you may be one of the great ones.

At last, a true loving wives story. Well done, keep writing, we may get this section back again from the cucks.

Great story and a finish that few other writers have matched. But you left open the mystery of how Jason's apartment is just a few doors away from the home he buys with Jennifer after her return. What is special about that street?

The only good wimp, is a dead wimp.

The price of lowering your guard can be very high...

is sick and now the idiot has to help. keep your workplace and don't go for a writer position

It sounds to me like this girl was essentially raped. I liked the boss and his girl friend. Story was a little difficult to follow. Not sure why we needed the boating accident at the end, but que sera. I still gave it five stars, though, it is an entertaining read.

WOW ! This was almost as exciting as watching the grass grow and the paint dry !

Thanks for your comment. Feel free to skip reading any of my future stories since it will be unlikely that you'd like them either. Foolish me for working hard to finish this story earlier largely based on your earlier post. Based upon most the of other comments I've received both public and private, as well as, its ratings, your viewpoint is in the minority.

if your gonna take the bitch back at least make them suffer.

There are a few better stories on this site but this one's up there as well. I liked the idea of the help given by Greg & Evelynn, it gave the story a nice touch. There are some real arsehole comments here, I wonder what their home & love life's like, must be pretty pathetic. If they don't like your work well ok that's their prerogative but hell some of it was vicious, grow up guys.

I read the stories here on lit erotica to get some instant gratification. However every once in a while you find stories that really are well written and touch your heart.

That's what this story did for me, and I appreciate the time and effort that you authors put into your work! Loved it and gave it 5 stars.

Congrats. Wow. What a powerful story. Five out of five. I loved the ending. I loved the overall arc of reconciliation. I found this by accident just scroll among the forgiveness LW stories on this site. I loved the scene where she realized she needed to shave her pussy and that she wasn't on birth control and was scared he'd be upset when she stopped him. Those really rang true. The ending was fantastic and sad and powerful and uplifting all at the same time.

I know I gave this a five, but I have a couple of constructive criticisms. It's too short. The reconciliation was too fast. I think the husband would have needed more time to absorb what Greg told him about Jennifer. I would have liked to have seen a conversation between the husband and Jennifer about what really happened that night. I think he would have wanted to hear it from her mouth.

The Wizard of Oz reference seemed to come from no where. Maybe I missed something but it needed to be set up better. The reference to her friend Sally was confusing. Again it seemed to come from no where. The husband's girlfriend after prison wasn't really resolved. Jennifer's mother is four hours away in a nursing home and we never hear about her again. I know this seems like a long list and it would have made the story longer to resolve all these issues. But this story was so good I would have love more of it.

I found the jumping between the different POV occasionally confusing even with the headings. Also I was confused about the time passing once or twice. I went back and reread the story and then I got it. Maybe tell the story in Greg's POV, then her POV and then her husband's POV without jumping back and forth.

Don't get me wrong. This was a great story. You have real talent, It just needed a few minor tweaks. Thanks for posting. Cheers. Steve

One big problem, the BS about the Porsche. An SC kicks the crap out of all the cars you mentioned and and LS would not fit properly. That was a really bad screw up, really a mits and a sub, why ruin things with screw ups like that? Also if you write again, use a fake company name that is somewhat real, xyz means you didn't put in any effort, kind of like the Porsche comment showed.

Is dead rabbits,when you have to be a politico to get a facial and manicure on Sunday.

You are 100% wrong!! I am a PCA member (Porsche Club of America) and I own an 80's SC. I know exactly what I'm talking (and writing) about. There are several companies that make Porsche to GM kits and one in particular that offers an LS conversion turnkey. A Chevy V8 with aluminum heads is nearly the same weight as a 3.0 or 3.2 liter Porsche flat six and IS a good fit. It's done frequently. 500+ horsepower is better than 180, right? Give me a break, use of an "XYZ" company has been used hundreds of times, on this site.

deadrabbits

I love this! Especially as Jason realised that Jen was essentially drugged! Any decent husband would wake up and smell the coffee here, this clearly was not a eoman who would constantly hurt her husband and family. She is worth forgiving and taking back. Definitely!

- A powerful ending to this fine story about lost love found again.

Fn good story. Pretty sad ending though. Never-the-less, a damn good story well worth the five stars I gave it. Now, I have to read your other story just to see if they are as good. Damn good job on this one though.

have to be done right. I believe you did it right. Most writer turn a chance to reconcile into a RAAC that shouldn't and is implausible.

Thanks for the story.

You write two good stories. Where are you ? We want more

Nice story,sorry you disappeared . A religious fantasy life after death.

one hell of a good read. thank you very much

Didn't expect that! Good story and good ending, sort of anyhow, a happy ending! Thank you.

Damn, got me with this one, well done.

Very touching story, greatly enjoyed. Wish you were still writing.

I enjoyed that story. A little bit unusual, but in a good way.

We walked down the hall towards a bright light. It looked like a nice place to be a cuck

In addition, this absolutely sealed a 1:

"Let me tell you that coercion by a older male superior on a younger, attractive, unsuspecting woman, married or not, happens more often than you think. I'm not sure you realize the power and control these men can cultivate. The power to affect one's financial livelihood and future can have tremendous influence and can surely catch someone 'off guard'. We, 'we' being my psychologist girlfriend and I, both believe that Jennifer is a victim here."

Like so in many other stories, we get the cliches of modern psychobabble and the tired trope that the little ladies can't be responsible because they lack moral agency.

Nice story, though it started jumping all over the place after Jason and Jen got back together.

Wonderful story...

Damn but that was an enjoyable read. Thank you

By cuckshit rabbit

Wonderful story. To the commenters who think the husband is weak: (a) he beat the crap out of the predator and did his time in jail and (b) the predator harassed her with economic rewards, she worked late because she wanted that promotion which gave the asshole opportunity, and he drugged her, hence her indecision when he raped her (yes drugged sex is rape). If you think that makes him cuck then you are either not reading the story or you don't know what rhe word means. Reconciliation was a no brainer.

Excellent story - excellent author! Very well done. Very believable

Don't care for reconciliation stories but the ending made up for it

Very well done, it was a very good read.

After pt 1 I thought it was going nowhere. God, if only....

Good story, thoroughly enjoyed it. More, please. As a newbie contributor to Lit., please be prepared for the sickos and weirdos who would throw rocks at the perfect stories. They cannot help themselves, the are truly sick. 5 *

I have never given an excellent review to anyone but you are the first and a 5 star.