The Prisoner of Glenda

One night I decided to stop off for a few beers after my work-study job in the library. The crowd at the bar was particularly animated and I stayed until closing. The camaraderie and the drink took my mind off Gail, if only for a few hours.

It was some time after 2am when I entered our darkened apartment. After so many beers, I was feeling sleepy and having problems negotiating the darkness. I removed my shoes then closed the door. I did not want to awaken Gail. My being drunk would not improve our relationship - what little relationship there was.

I felt my way along the wall of the corridor leading to my room. About midway through the hallway, I heard sounds coming from her room. Afraid that she might be soon be coming into the hall I dashed the remaining distance and quickly closed the door.

I thought that I had been quiet. I now heard talking through the wall. They were somewhat muffled but I recognized Gail's voice. She was moaning and someone was talking to her. I got very still and concentrated. It was....Brad. Brad was in there with her.

From what I heard, they were not studying. There was movement on the bed and moaning bordering on sobbing. I had to leave. Seeing those two huddled together everyday was one thing; I drew the line at listening to them have sex. The fact that it was Gail was particularly disturbing. I could probably camp out in the roof lounge until daybreak.

I grabbed my pillow and bedspread and quietly left the apartment. When I arrived in the lounge, I found it deserted. I threw down the pillow and crawled up on the closest couch. Sleep claimed me within minutes.

I woke around 7am. The lounge was composed of floor to ceiling 20-foot high windows on three sides. Someone had opened the drapes and the invading light was blinding. Whether I wanted to or not I needed to return to my room.

The apartment was empty when I arrived. I showered, dressed and made breakfast. As I finished eating Glenda called for Gail. I told her I had not seen her all morning but I guessed that she was probably out with Brad. Glenda's was curt with me as she asked that I have her call when she returned.

An upcoming exam caused me to return to the library. I was there until dinnertime. Brad was in but there was no sign of Gail. I did not let on that I knew about their tryst; instead, I asked if Gail were cooking that evening. He then informed me that she had moved out!

Without questioning him, I went into her room. Her clothes were gone and so were all of her things. Gone were the pictures on her bureau, wall posters, even her curtains. I then went in the kitchen and noticed that her cooking utensils were missing. There was little doubt now. She had left. I asked Brad if he had helped her move and he simply said no. When I asked him where she had moved to, he said he did not know. He did not sound too pleased, so I stopped asking questions. I thought it odd she left so suddenly but she had been with us so much longer than expected.

A few days later Michael dropped by the apartment and asked about her whereabouts. I told him she moved; she had not spoken with me about her intent to leave. However, I was the last person to ask about Gail. I suggested that he speak with Brad.

Michael seemed to suggest that I had something to do with her leaving. He said that Glenda thought I had somehow driven Gail out of our apartment. Nothing could have been further from the truth I told him. Initially, I had been hesitant to befriend her, but now I missed her.

I did not pursue any more information about Gail. I wanted to but the knowledge that she had been with Brad acted to check my curiosity. I had no right to be so concerned. She and I merely shared an apartment. That we got along was a bonus.

By the end of April Gail's name was rarely mentioned. It was as if she had never existed. Why had she gone? Brad suggested that there was some "female" dispute, similar to the one that had driven Gail from her former roommates. I translated that into an impression that she had had some falling out with Glenda. That would explain her sudden departure and Glenda's distress. That reason fit my limited understanding.

One Friday night in late May, Michael made another of his increasingly rare appearances. Glenda was out visiting with her mother and would be away that weekend. Her parents had just split up and her mom was despondent over the separation.

We were lounging in the living room watching a game and nursing a couple of beers. It was just he and I. Brad had left earlier for a concert. Michael was fidgety. It was obvious he had something on his mind.

"I'm going to ask Glenda to marry Me.", he began.

"Am I supposed to be surprised? When did she tell you she wanted a ring?" I said before taking another swig.

Michael feigned annoyance but started laughing. "Well she sort of hinted that she didn't want to wait till I graduated law school. But hell, it doesn't matter to me as to when. If it will make her happy..."

"You sound married already." I said smiling. "Seriously though, congratulations. You are a lucky man. Glenda is the perfect girl for you. You guys getting married will not be a surprise to anyone. "

"Hmm, I guess you're right. Look, I'm in need of a best man..."

"Me? I am honored but what about Brad? He has been your friend longer than I have. Aside from that he's known Glenda longer too."

"Glenda said the same thing. But this is not her decision."

"Michael I don't want to be the cause of your first argument with your wife to be. I don't need to be your best man."

"I want you to be. You know Brad. He is a great guy but who knows if he would even show up on time. He hasn't known Glenda that much longer than you have but what matters is that he's too unreliable."

"Brad would be on time, he'd just be at the wrong church!" I said, as we both cracked up. Taking another swig of my beer, I was glad Michael was going to tell him and not me.

I do not know when Michael and Brad had their conversation about the wedding. The outcome was that Brad was OK with the idea of me as best man but Glenda was not. The wedding was slated for June of the following year, just a couple of weeks after graduation; there was time to change her mind.

Contrary to many of my peers, I recommitted myself to my studies in my last year. Senior year came and went quickly. It was June 1982 and we were graduating. Michael had been accepted into the University's Law School. I had job with a local computer-consulting firm and Brad was going into pharmaceutical sales in a nearby drug company. We would all be staying in the area.

The wedding however, proved to be more of a challenge than I anticipated. Since Glenda's parents were now divorced, she did not want her father invited. After months of wrangling, Glenda relented. Michael negotiated the settlement with Glenda so her father would be giving away the bride.

I was tasked to speak with her father. I initially thought of drafting Brad to help but decided to act alone. I made an appointment to visit his office. As soon as I entered, I could tell that I was not his kind of people. However, I spoke with authority for his daughter, so in exchange for a significant role I managed to have Daddy gift her and Michael a home in Swarthmore as a wedding present. I left feeling good about that.

Even with this agreement, there was a recognizable tension the entire day of the wedding. The reception was like a gauntlet with us as Michael's friends avoiding the father's family altogether. Many of them sided with her father and wanted to argue their position with members of the wedding party. Twice irate relatives corralled me. I never saw such a mess. I was glad when the evening was over and that Michael and Glenda had left for their honeymoon. If I ever married, it was not going to be like this.

With the wedding over, my attention turned to my career and beginning my life as an adult. For the first time ever I was living entirely on my own. I had found an apartment in University City and was busy selecting furnishings.

Late one fall evening I received an unexpected call from Glenda.

"Hello"

"Andrew?"

"Yes, is this...Glenda?" I responded. I knew the voice but I was taken aback that she called.

"Yes it's me. Are you busy?"

"No, I was just watching a tape of yesterday's game, nothing important."

"Good, I wanted to call you to thank you for your help with the wedding....and to....."

"Yes?"

"Andrew will you please forgive me?"

"Forgive you? For what, you haven't done anything to me that I'm aware of..."

"Yes I have. I have not treated you fairly. I have purposely kept you at a distance. When Michael told me you were going to be his best man, I was against you. I tried to get him to change his mind. I was upset with you because of Gail. I thought you forced her out of the apartment. After what you did to that other girl I thought you did something similar to her...I was..."

"I never told Gail to leave", I said, interrupting her. "I never wanted her to go." I said my voice almost cracking.

"I know that now. Michael explained all of that to me. He also explained why he chose you as his best man. I never understood how very close you two are. You are his best friend; he trusts you more than anyone except his mother... or me. It really hurts him that you and I do not get along. I'm so sorry to have misjudged you. Can we start over?"

"Yes, we can start over." I said sincerely. Before she could speak, again I spoke up to lighten the tone. I also wanted to avoid speaking about Denise. I was still coming to terms with my immaturity in that misadventure.

"So how was the honeymoon? Was Hawaii all they say it is?"

"Oh, it was beautiful. The beaches were incredible and resort spared no expense on our behalf. We visited all the major islands. We even went snow skiing."

The conversation just flowed from there. We talked like old friends. I found out that night that she had a wicked sense of humor. By the end of the call my feelings about Glenda had turned a full 180 degrees. We were not great pals but we were not enemies either. I was relieved to be feeling good about our talk.

She called again a few nights later asking about my apartment and whether I had furnished it completely. When I told her I was still in the process of getting things together, she volunteered to help me shop and to decorate. That way the place would have some semblance of a women's touch and I would not scare away potential girlfriends.

For the next few months on Saturdays, Glenda and I formed an expedition to furnish my apartment. Where she found the time, I do not know. With Michael in Law School, she was already working two jobs. The house might have been a gift but the upkeep was a significant financial responsibility as were the expenses related to Michael's schooling.

I welcomed her intrusion. What man would not want to be the object of a pretty woman's attentions? Our time together allowed me some insight into her as a person. There was nothing romantic in our relationship. I came to regard Glenda as a second sister and I am sure she felt the same towards me. She was not the snob I had earlier believed. Quite the opposite; she was one of the most down to earth people I'd ever met, and one of the most considerate and thoughtful.

I learned that her father was the ostentatious one in the family. He liked to shower her with gifts. He hired the interior designer to reshape her apartment. He purchased her car for her, picked the make and model and had it delivered to her doorstep. She had not asked for any of these things. In fact she was somewhat embarrassed by it all. She just did not want to hurt his feelings by seeming ungrateful.

She might have continued on this course had he not cheated on her mother. His infidelity and their subsequent divorce changed everything. She stopped the gifts and determined to become more self-reliant. Her mother became the main connection to her family.

I had not thought much about infidelity until I started talking with Glenda. It became apparent to me that the impact of her father's unfaithfulness went far beyond just him and her mother. Glenda was shaken to her core. She began to question all of her beliefs and close relationships. While she never came out and said it, I understood that at times she even questioned Michael's love for her.

It did not happen often, but if they had a minor disagreement, which was common for newlyweds, she had a tendency to either call me later or tell me about it at our next outing. Initially, I asked her to speak with her husband, later I learned that it was not about giving her advice but about just listening.

With Michael's studies, she could not burden him so her trips with me along with our conversations were a form of relief away from the pressures of her jobs and family.

Shortly after Glenda and I reconciled, Michael established a tradition that we continue to this day. We began having monthly poker games at their house. The normal players were he, Brad and I, Reuben when he was in town, and the fifth rotated between friends of his or Brad's. These games became our primary vehicle for staying connected to one another.

Chapter 3: Betrayal and Obsession

Three years passed without any significant changes in my life. I was making good money in a job I enjoyed. My peers respected me and I was on a fast track to management. I was reasonably happy, my only disappointment being my lack of a steady girlfriend. It was May of 1985 when trouble found me.

Michael was graduating from law school. The two of us were relaxing one Sunday afternoon on his patio. It was unusually warm that spring and we were debating the merits of an early barbeque. Michael seemed preoccupied.

I opened by asking, "Where is Glenda? I thought she would be taking advantage of the weather to start planting."

"Oh, she's at her mother's for the day. I am on her shit list. This is her way of letting me know she's still upset."

Now I was curious. "Upset about what?"

Michael sighed before he began. "I received a job offer from a firm in Chicago. They are flying me out next week for an interview and a chance to check out some of the communities where we might live. I do not know if I will take the position but I do want to give it a fair evaluation. Problem is that I agreed to the meet without discussing it with her."

"Glenda has always felt insecure in our relationship. No matter what I have done to ease her fears, she still thinks I might leave her. This interview has magnified those fears."

This last statement was unsettling. I had sensed some doubts Glenda had in our previous conversations. Her fears were just below the surface, nothing specific, but I understood where Michael was coming from.

"When I was accepted to Law School they had an orientation for all the spouses. One of the speakers asked everyone in the room to look around them. He said, "Three out of every four of you sitting here will be not being here for your spouse's graduation. They will be under significant pressure and that often transfers to their relationships." I did not know it at the time, but this really freaked her out. I am not like that Andrew. We are married for life, good or bad, sickness or health. She's was not my meal ticket, she is my partner. "

Michael paused for a moment. The muscles in his jaw were throbbing. It was clear to me that this issue with Glenda was very sensitive. I knew as his friend that he needed to talk this through, and he needed me to listen. Therefore, I sat very still and waited for him to gather his thoughts.

"She worked her ass off for us. For the first couple of years she had two jobs. She never once complained. She managed all of our money, made all of the financial decisions. She bought all of my books, my clothes, my food....everything. She still maintains the same pace. I have tried to get her to slow down. She ignores me."

"Then this opportunity came up in Chicago. It is a lot of money. I would have significant responsibilities and a chance at becoming an associate in just two years. Glenda could stay home if she wants, or go back to school. We could begin our family. I could take care of her for a change. "

"Besides, it is just an interview. I thought she would be thrilled. We would discuss any offer they made. She would be part of the final decision."

"You know", I interjected, "You need to fix this. I remember Bill Cosby mentioning that a husband needed to remember three little words in order to have a happy marriage". That got Michael's attention. "Just three little words....I was wrong".

Michael's smile returned with the punch line. The conversation quickly shifted back to what to have for dinner and then the season the Phillies were having. A barbeque was looking more like a winner the more we talked.

# # # # # #

The next day found me staying late at the office again. It was 9:30pm before I remembered I needed to be somewhere. One of my co-workers was having a bachelor party downtown. I was not looking forward to it but I had known Ted since I joined the business. We were friends, so I was obligated to be there.

The party was to being given at a new club in the pier district. I had not been there before and the directions were not exactly the best. The result was that I arrived much later than everyone else and parked in the side lot.

The club had only two floors. The lower level was open to the public as a bar and restaurant, while the upper level was rented out for private parties. As I made my way to the stairs, I had to pass the entrance to the restaurant. The décor was ultra modern along the lines of my apartment. They could have used the lighting to better advantage though. Perhaps this explained why the space was sparsely populated.

As I scanned the room, my eye caught a man and a woman in a booth across floor on the far side. They were sitting with their profiles toward me and it appeared that they were engaged in a very intimate conversation. The woman's posture was slightly slouched and she looked as if she were going to tilt over at any second. I slowed my movement and squinted in their direction. I knew that pair. It was Brad and Glenda. Courtesy would have dictated that I stop by their table and at least say Hello. However, I was running late and I could see them later.

The bachelor party was going full blast as my friend Ted was getting a lap dance from one of the strippers. The crowd hollered when she suddenly let loose her bra and decided to hide his face between mountains of flesh. Two other women joined her. The look on his face was priceless.

After a couple of hours of constrained debauchery mixed with some networking, my bladder demanded attention. Getting up from my seat, I went in search of the bathroom. I then remembered Glenda and Brad so I decided to use the facilities on the first floor.

Entering the restaurant, I saw the restroom sign and began my approach. The place was still relatively deserted and the booth where Glenda and Brad were seated was now empty. I now regretted not speaking to them earlier.

Finishing my business I approached the basin and was startled by a noise. The room had appeared empty when I entered. There it was again. It sounded like someone moaning.

Walking back towards the stalls, I heard it again, and noticed one partially open door. Crouching I saw a pair of legs....female legs!

I wanted to leave at that moment. Turn. Run. Get the hell out of there. Whatever went on here it had nothing to do with me. She might be junkie or a prostitute. She? Hey, it might be a guy in drag? I should not get involved. All good reasons to leave I thought. Instead, I pushed the door to the stall inward.

I was completely unprepared for the scene that unfolded. Seated a mere two feet away was Glenda. Her dress was bunched around her waist; her panty hose torn in at least two places, one area being her crotch. She was leaning backwards trying to get up from the seat and blinking her eyes apparently struggling to acquire focus.