All Comments on 'When We Were Married Ch. 05A'

OK,OK!! Since we are fellow Vietnam vets, the "ghe" should have been "the". I was a little under the weather when I wrote that comment.

Hay guy, "gnu" that, but just being a smart ass for a little levity "WHILE WE WAIT".

AND A GREAT BIG THANK YOU FOR YOUR SERVICE TO OUR COUNTRY.

Tom.

Interesting comments!

I've been frequenting this site for six years. Initially I was hesitant to post a comment. I didn't want to sound too naive or stupid. However, I got over it and eventually became quite bold. TheCelt wrote a story "Billy” that bothered me greatly. I wrote my own ending and sent it to him. No, he didn't bite my head off but encouraged me to write more and even sent some of his stories to me to fashion an ending. He is a class act. <P>

From then on, I developed an appreciation for what authors do. They get no monetary reward. All they receive is our appreciation and sometimes our abuse. <P>

Like the rest of y'all, I'm pissed with the sporadic posting; However, I don't want the story to end. Some of us beseech Q to let us know what's going on. While others say shut up and write. <P>

To paraphrase curiousss: If you can't change it, you might as well learn to let it go. <P>

Thank you my friend for writing and all the enjoyment you have given me. <P>

Jen

Thank you, Jennybear!! I’ll kept your comments in mind whenever I have the urge to make nasty critical comments. I now realize that authors really are good people, and only publish to remain active and creative; and to provide readers the products of their labor as a way to spread joy, love, goodwill, and the opportunity to learn new survivsl skills.

PS -----Oh, by the way, I rarely comment on stories, and when I do its to praise the author. DQS1's WWWM has been the exception, in part because I believe that while she may be very smart she is also intellectually dishonest and maniputive.

Fantastic, I cannot seem to stop reading your work. I seldom comment. However, you do deserve the acompliment. Most works, I don't bother to finish, let alone comment. There are a few authors here that do hold my attention. You are one. PLEASE keep up the great work.

I just posted 5B. The way things go it will probably be posted Tuesday or Wednesday, although I could hope for Monday. As I mention in an editorial note, this is not what i'd intended 5B to be. It's only about 12000 words, 4 Lit pages, but I thought i'd hit a natural stopping point. Despite the fact it was hard as hell to write, I enjoyed it. I hope readers like it. 5B will be at least two chapters now, maybe three. And there will be more after it. This has turned into a second life for me, but I am still enjoying the product.

Thanks for the update.

I really enjoyed the story. Thanks for sharing it with us. You kept me so engrossed that I could hardly wait to read the next chapter. I'm looking forward to reading more of your work.

Dear MS Anonymous:

I AM SURPRISED THAT YOU ARE NOT AWARE THAT A dumb illiterate person usually does not know that she is dumb and illiterate. So, girlfriend, don't waste your time telling her what not to do.

I hit a nerve with my previous comment.didn't I, babygirl.

I LOVE YOU TOO, babygirl

we had comments from fake DQS, now readers are getting annonymous mails? wow.......I am sure it will all end once a new chapter is published on the website.

Even though the court action is a little far fetched, the outcome is understandable. I would buy the book because it is hard to put down for the evening. Keep up the outstanding work.

There are only two possible endings one could be typical DQS 'only thing which matters is what big boobie wife wants" or it would be story of movie 'Meet the Bill'.

DQS is very talented in using controversy for popularity of story, which was supposed to be 2 or 3 chapter story is now 5x4 probably more. because he does not want to lose the importance he got here.

Good Luck to you.

you had enough time to do it right and we waited this long.take your time and do your story right your way.don't fuck up a wet dream.thanks for your story and you are a star writer.

I wonder why this story continues. Wait we still have the mystery of Debbie's illness which will be the reason for her being a bitch. I am about a month (i.e., 2 chapters) behind the story which is fine. I will finish it when the last chapter goes out. No matter what other women come into Bill's life my predication is that there will be a great reconcilation between Bill and Debbie. I liked the courtroom drama but it is subordinate to the martial focus of the story. I can not wait until you finsh this story because I believe that future ones with be better and shorter.

Why Aline? This is going to turn out bad. She's still married for crying out loud! NO! Bill should be there for Debbie, even if she's a lusty, horny bitch. She's not looking to hot and he just smirks at her? Now he's the one pissing on their 20 years of marriage. Sure, he let himself go, sure she was a bitch to rub her disdain for him in his face, sure she was the one to bury the marriage by rubbing his face again when she told him she didn't love him anymore, but he's pissing on a grave they both still care about by not showing ANY compassion for his unfaithful wife. The 'bigger man' would face the problem instead of hoping time will wash it away. The way things are going, Bill doesn't deserve much more pity than Debbie, if any more.

All that cursing on the witness stand. Conversing with a juror. BS

BS. CRAPOLA IS WHAT

I sure don't agree with the other comments....That was the first chapter I gave a five.

life

Hey the guys EX has a PhD a Doctorate, why not play up her education against her stupidness....bill

This is a great story and GREAT writing. Keep it up Dan and ignore these fools. Perhaps posting this up in sol would be a good idea...

I love the R Heinlien quotes, he's my favorite author and I love his stuff. Make sure you've read "The Lives of Lazarus Long"

This chapter really showcased your great talent, so much so that it could almost have been a good stand alone story A N D that is becoming a major problem with this tale.

This is whole long saga was supposed to be about Bill & Debbie, their problems & how they dealt with them or so you wrote in earlier chapters & notes, but now it seems more like what a great prosecutor Bill is becoming. I can see in future chapters Bill dealing with different cases, such as the black cop, the drug overlord etc, which means more bloody legal battles & courtroom dramas, no wonder it's so long. I'm at the stage now where I wish it would just end & soon, but there's 7 more to go & I never give up reading a story once started unless the writing is crap. Unfortunately you're a good writer, you started with a great plot, moved along ok for 2 - 3 chapters then got side tracked with silly little sub plots, so I'm stuck suffering through numerous chapters still to go. What a waste of your talent. Would have been a 5 ***** if a stand alone but in context of this tale just 2**

Lew can't have it both ways.

He claims that Ballantyne testified to avoid an accessory charge.

But if, as Lew says, there was no murder, then there can be no accessory to murder. If Ballantyne says that Granny never planned to kill her husband, then how can Bill prosecute him for not going to the police with her plan?

It's sort of a Catch-22.

Glad for the recap in pars. 2 and 3, been so long ago I forgot all that.

So Bill is making up for lost time, plugging women quite quickly now.

Finally, why did I not expect to have seen the last of Aline in Ch. 4?

low self esteem

with a God Complex

an interesting mix

I still can't get over Debbie's attitude towards her breasts - she talks about flat-chested women, when she REALLY means anybody with smaller boobs than her! Then, when someone like Myra shows up with bigger boobs, suddenly they're a "cow" with "udders"!

"You like that Mr. Maitland? Feel that?" - Um, they're having sex, and they're not on a first-name basis?

"We're two old friends who finally scratched and itch. That's all." - While I guess it's cool that she's not LOOKING for some sort of a commitment, I find it a little odd that she's pretty much arbitrarily ruling it out.

"Deb has got to be eating her heart out seeing you get younger and hotter." - Yep, as he gets older, he can keep working out and still look good. She can keep working out, but nothing short of a boob job is going to keep those tits (or is that "udders"?) from sagging.

I loved how he scared the hit-and-run defendant into taking the plea deal, and I REALLY loved the return of Aline!

This doesn't apply strictly to this chapter, but Debbie always claimed that her attraction to Bill wasn't just "hero worship", that she really loved him.

But when things go difficult, when he got out of shape and dedicated too much to his work, where was that "love" then?

I know it's been said many times (including by me!), but she supposedly can get any man to bend to her will with a crook of her finger, yet she is powerless to get the man who loves her deeply to hit the gym and cut back on his hours?

re:

Idle Thought

This doesn't apply strictly to this chapter, but Debbie always claimed that her attraction to Bill wasn't just "hero worship", that she really loved him.

But when things go difficult, when he got out of shape and dedicated too much to his work, where was that "love" then?

I know it's been said many times (including by me!), but she supposedly can get any man to bend to her will with a crook of her finger, yet she is powerless to get the man who loves her deeply to hit the gym and cut back on his hours?

------------------------------------

Must be that the saying:

"The only thing that gets most men into the gym is divorce court"

is true.

(1) Finding out there is good sex after divorce without having to pay for it.

(2) Scaring the vehicular homicide culprit into taking the State's please bargain by his presence alone.

(3) The reappearance of Aline.

Truly a great story. You are so very talented. Just wanted to add my 2 cents. Can't wait any more to roll to the next part. Love Aline!!

but beware.......the price of fame detracts, TK U MLJ LV NV

Bill is having a day.

"And Bill didn't have any friends, not any real friends. Apparently a lot of people respected him, but he wasn't the type to go out drinking and he'd never gone out to a bar with the guys or to sports events. Because he was either working or home watching television with his wife and kids.

It was strange, she thought, that she could recognize that now, when she couldn't before. Bill had spent too much time at work, but any free time he'd ever had he'd spent with her or the kids. Maybe he had been dull as hell, but he had always come home."

Debbie fucked some 20 guys by the time she was 15, gangbanged in college, apparently raped by three pieces of shit who should be physically castrated before being dead and didn't tell her husband; time will tell how she got into that position in the first place but I have my suspicions, no matter if she didn't fuck them she was cheating every time she let someone feel her up, fucked Douch while she was still married in the marital bed among other places, coming on to Lew and all of the rest of her whore actions to degrade her husband = you can't take the slut out of the girl. She'll wake up eventually, but I'd move heaven and earth to be with Aline, the next time I danced with Aline I'd ask the band to play Jay and the Americans "Cara Mia" and "This Magic Moment". Signed: BTW

Many women would look at a husband like him and realize he was a Paladin holding the bridge and be proud to hold the home sanctuary for him. She thought her body was enough and he should be satisfied with whatever leavings she could save for him. No respect absolutely none for him or his calling.

I love Bill , I am 45 but i can understand the magnetic attraction he has with women he wouldn't want me, who would when they can have the lovely Aline, but how can anyone say he is not worse than Debbie. He is prepared to fuck a friends wife while she still loves her husband, she is a much bigger slut than Debbie was. Come on you Debbie haters, whose done the most wrong, between the three of them, sorry I am in Debbies corner.

This is basically a "Made for TV" story. A series. At times this has been a very good story. Some not so. But just the same riveting. When I hit the end I'll rate it.

Five stars except I don't think attorneys either prosecuting or defence can carry on a conversation with s juror during a trial. Only during the selection process.

This is epic, what a wonderful tale of heartbreak and rising from the ashes!

Definitely my Favourite.. even if it ended here. Bill got his Aline.. The End.

So.....what is Debbie going to do know? Bill's getting plenty of nooky and frenchy is back?

hmm at this point I feel like we got a bit too much "filler".

Also Aline is back, just why?

The court scenes in this chapter were the worse written I have ever encountered, they were completely wrong, attorneys asking no questions of witnesses but providing testimony themselves. It would have taken very little effort to get this correct.

Lews questioning, while not asking a question doesn't seem feasible. That said, I haven't been able to put this series down. I hope we hear back from the Priests son. 5 for the book.

MORE OF ALINE PLEASE!!!

As another commenter said, it's difficult to put this series down, even if it is the second time I've read it. No criticism and the story or the writing of , there are few sentences that didn't quite read right, it does need some beta reading, but still a great story.

Some unprofessional conduct in the courtroom but still a great read.

5 Stars on this one . Can I get Aline's number ?

2nd reading for me and if anyone is interested the next part has an Outstanding !!!! scene involving Aline and Bill and his family, so read on.

Very interesting. A little bit too long in the courtroom but still keeping my attention. Glad Bill is getting some and skank slut isn't. Please don't turn her into a victim and let her off the hook. She's a self-absorbed tramp and if you change her this late in the story it will be terrible!

Woohoo! Aline is back!!

Great suspense, great action, the good guy might get the girl and ride off into the sunset... maybe. Thank you.

Uh-oh. Trouble is back. At least times with Aline are romantic, uplifting and bitter-sweet in this gloomy angstfest.

This was worse than others. Not only did he commit a discovery violation but his closing committed several offenses that were mistrial worthy. In real life, a mistrial is granted and she walks on double jeopardy grounds.

Murder trials in the U.S in LW stories seem to last about 1/10th the time they do in the U.K.!

Much too late to do anything about it, but waters are "roiled," not "rolled."