White Lies

Walker went to his bank, withdrew half of their savings. He drove to a different bank and deposited the check.

Carla earned as much as he did, sometimes a bit more so half of it was hers anyway. She had her own credit cards, nothing to do there. They both even had their own retirement plans, so that was it.

The house? It was paid for, the only thing left was his car and Carla didn't drive. He barely got back to the motel when his phone rang. Glancing at it, he saw it was Carla.

He pushed the button, put it to his ear, saying nothing.

"Honey? Please! Come and talk to me!" She pleaded.

"Why? Where the fuck were you all last night?"

"I stayed over at Johnny's. What I asked you, that was a mistake. I have been all mixed up. We didn't do anything, we just talked."

"Johnny's, huh? I will just fucking bet. Tell him I told him, now I am coming after him. It doesn't matter what the consequences are, I told him." That same cold flat tone was in his voice.

"Honey, please don't hurt him. Please don't. It will just cause trouble, I won't ever again, I promise!" Carla wailed.

Walker hung up.

++

Two police cruisers were parked at the hospital, Walker just drove right on by. He was almost back to his motel when another one pulled him over.

There was quite a discussion, Walker explained that he had done nothing at all. Since he hadn't, other than telling the Doctor what he would do if he was caught fucking his wife, they had to let him go.

"I don't blame you one bit, bud. But don't, OK? I would lots rather fuck with the jerk than you. Hell, we get this shit all the time, and we usually end up having to arrest the good guy." The cop told him.

Then he got into his cruiser and drove back towards town.

Walker went to his motel room, went to bed. He shut off his phone. The next morning he checked, she had called over twenty times.

That afternoon he was on an airplane, headed for New York.

Sara was floored when she looked up and saw him walking into the lobby of the big brownstone apartment building she lived in. Like always, he marveled at how tall, how beautiful she was.

So unlike her mother, who was much shorter. Sara had filled out, developed nicely.

"Daddy!" She yelled, running into his arms. Walker's heart melted, he could not stop the flood of tears.

"Where is Mom?" She asked, looking around.

"Carla didn't come, it's just me. I really need to talk to you."

Walker saw her face change from surprise to shock as he explained what was going on. He didn't mention that he was sure Carla had cheated recently, at least once.

"Mom wouldn't do that, Daddy. She wouldn't lie. I am yours, I know I am! You need to talk to her, Daddy. Please?" She begged.

"I have to know for sure, I will never have peace if I don't." He reached into his pocket, showed her the Q-tip sealed in a plastic packet, and the small vial to place the sample in.

"Daddy, this is silly. I am yours, I know I am!" She was crying now also. This was breaking his heart but he had no choice. She saw that, sighed and opened her mouth.

That evening they went out for a good dinner, Walker got to meet Sara's boyfriend. He was a nice young man, clean cut and well dressed, on his way to becoming a Mechanical Engineer. They spent all of the next day together, then that evening he was back on an airplane.

He had asked Sara to not mention that he had been there, and promised he would call with the results as soon as he knew.

He wasn't completely sure that she would not tell her mother if she called though.

+++

Once back home and settled, Walker returned to work. Carla called constantly on his cell phone, then tried the office number until she was warned by the receptionist to knock it off.

Sometimes Walker took the calls and talked briefly, sometimes he didn't. Without fail she protested that she had not done anything much with Jonathan, that it was quick and she didn't even feel it, then she apologized over and over for even considering it.

That wasn't enough. Walker just could not find it inside himself to forgive that.

"Haven't you ever looked at a woman and thought about it, Walker? Tell me the truth, damn you! I know I made a mistake but I love you. So I didn't do anything really. It was nothing!" She told him one day when he relented and they had dinner together.

"No! I haven't..." Then he hesitated, thinking of the few brief minutes when he had run into Sherry at the bar. It had popped into his head, that had changed only when he figured out that Sherry was now a working girl.

"I...I guess maybe there is guilt on both sides. But I never cheated on you, Carla, not one time."

Then he told her about running into Sherry that night. He knew he actually had considered it, briefly. The fact that he had made love to Sherry after they met was no different than Carla being with someone, there was no commitment to each other yet.

Outside, Walker opened the car door for her. She got in and settled, then looked at him.

"Please don't take me home, take me somewhere else. Please?" She asked.

+++

Walker was leaned back on the hotel room bed when Carla stepped out of the bathroom. She was stark naked, smiling.

"Do you love me, Walker?" She asked.

"Yes. I do." She piled on top of him, for quite a long time that evening it was like they had been before. Even her nipples hardened into tiny little buttons, she was excited again like they had been so early on in their marriage. Oddly, she even felt far tighter than normal, Walker had a small struggle gaining entrance.

He was reasonably sure right then that it had been nearly two months for her, also. He woke up the next morning to her making a great effort to get him up and going.

Later, as they lay basking in each others arms, she asked him to please come back home. Walker knew that was where he really wanted to be.

But he still could not get that Jonathan out of his head.

"I don't know, is that guy still around, still asking you out?" He asked.

"Johnny? He is still on staff, but he doesn't bother me now. We just work together, is all. To be honest, I think you scared him. I heard he has applications in all over. You won't hurt him, please? It will just cause trouble."

Walker showed no reaction at all to her calling him "Johnny." Not Jonathan, or Doctor Hansen, but "Johnny."

"That is exactly what I planned on doing." That flat tone was in his voice again. Carla gave him a nervous look.

"I know. But we didn't, we really didn't do anything that mattered. I was all mixed up, confused. I am on some medication now, too. I didn't tell you before, but I was going through the change. I am a nurse and knew but...it made me all crazy."

"I love you so much, Walker!" She rolled over against his chest.

"All right. Let's try." He said. Carla was suddenly happy, excited. By that evening, he had moved back into the house.

+++

Two days later the packet arrived. Carla was at work. Walker went in and sat down, he sat there for a very long time. He didn't want to know, but at the same time he had to.

He opened the packet.

The first line read, "The probability of paternity is 0.00%." It was what he had expected. Walker did not read the rest, he took the packet into the other room, ran it through the document shredder.

He had already dug out the old checkbook stubs for Carla's account, apparently she had not even been thinking about it. All saved and filed in order, going back years.

Birth control pills, not one time had he ever known about that. Then he found the receipts from her trips to different conventions over the years?

That part was fairly easy to figure out.

Next he called Sara in New York.

"It looks like you were right, honey! You are my daughter, all mine!" He forced brightness, happiness into his voice.

"I knew that Daddy. I knew it all along. I am glad. How are you and Mommy doing?"

"We are OK. She is getting some medicine that helps her, things will be all right."

"That's good, I am glad. By the way, we will be flying home in a couple of weeks. We have something to tell you."

"We?" Sara said? Walker knew what that probably was.

"Neat, Honey. We both love you!"

"I love you too, Daddy. Tell Mom for me, too."

"OK. I will." He hung up.

He knew very well that eventually Sara would find out the truth. But there was no way in the world that he could deal with what he knew her reaction would be.

+++

So his baby girl was getting married? That was obvious. Walker was pleased with that. That would delay things a bit, it appeared.

No matter. He went down to a local lawyer's office, placed all of his savings, all of his assets into a life estate, with Sara as the beneficiary.

Back at the house, Walker called the hospital, listened to the list of options. "Doctor Hansen, extension 1430." The recording said.

Walker checked on that every single day. He hung up without saying a word.

He told the man what he was going to do. He thought he had been perfectly clear on that point.

"Johnny" was still there, still working with Carla on a daily basis. Carla was still coming home from her shifts late regularly.

All of those trips, those conventions? The receipts told the story quite clearly. Birth control pills, even though he had tried to have another child, always hoping?

Carla did not want to carry another man's child, or she did not want another one at all.

The reason why no longer mattered.

Walker went into the garage, unwrapped the stun gun he had purchased. He placed that in the case he bought.

Walking over to his workbench, he opened the box. It really was a nice hatchet, solid handle, just the right weight and length.

"Made in China." The tag read. He peeled the sticker off with his thumbnail absentmindedly. Everything in the damned world is made in China nowadays, he thought.

Dull though. He plugged in his bench grinder, began to work the edge of the tool. Then he picked up his honing stone, carefully brushing the edge.

He had told the man, told him in no uncertain terms. Perhaps Jonathan would take the advice, there was still time for him to run.

That was no longer going to matter, though. He had told the man that Carla was his wife.

Walker had a daughter to get married off first. Sperm did not change the fact that Sara was his.

So. A month, maybe two, perhaps six?

No hurry. No hurry at all. He told the man what he was going to do. He had given him very good advice.

One just does not fuck another man's wife, willing or not. Good wives do not lie and cheat on their husbands.

Once, a moment? He could perhaps understand, the flesh is weak. He knew he had that possible flaw inside himself. Something like that one might be able to forgive, get past it.

But years? Lies, going on and on for years?

Walked tested the edge of the hatchet on a piece of paper, it sliced it easily without tearing.

Satisfied, he put it in the case with the stun gun, pushed the case up onto the very top shelf.

Inside the house, he saw Carla in the kitchen.

"What's for dinner, honey?" He smiled.

No hurry. No hurry at all.